Pride Land Information Source
The Television Show of all the 'True'
Aspects of the Pride Lands- Inereeww
ih Ed
ONLY ONE MORE REVIEW? YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT! ER... CAN'T YOU?
Disclaimer : Seneerishness and Cameraman Jamiepoo belong to me. All the rest 're Disney in this chappiepoo. And I don't own Channel 3, Live Copter 3, Pride Rock, being live, cameras, or anything like that.
Notes : Finally, into Scar's Rule! This will be a good one, hmm?
We fade into classic different wacky 'Pride Land Information Source' signs, as traditional theme plays
Seneerie (our host): singing; tune is similar to that of 'Home on the Range'... the original, not the Disney song. A little too many words in some of the phrases...
Oh... the work was hard
and the pay was bad
and the way here was quite bor-ing
But on the way here
We see quite the advertisement
And that really got us lur-ing
So...
tune now similar to 'We're Gonna Take a Walk Outside Today'; if you've seen The Adventures of Milo and Otis you'll understand
If you're really bored and want to do something
Then at this show all your bells will ring
Yeah, if you're really bored and want to do something
Then at this show all your bells will ring
It's a really weird world and a good one too
for the stupid bums and the ones in the loo
Yeah, it's a really weird world and a good one too
for the stupid bums and the ones in the loo!
we now switch to a dome-like room, made of rock. In the middle is a polished rectangular table with two seats across from each other. In one of the two seats is a cream colored lioness; probably around Kiara's age at her time. The lioness is sitting like a lion, except her paws are on the table. This is Seneerie; who is giving you an Ed-like stare. She has been running this show for a matter of 6 years. On each side of the table is a microphone on a tiny stand with a long cord that seems to lead to nowhere.
Seneerie: Hello viewers! It's REALLY been a while... eh? Heh... for a while, I was in like, no shape to do like, interviews, and then Mufiepoo and Sambio died, and I was like, in a state of depression. But I'm over it now and ready to do more interviews! gasps Yay! Today, we get to interview one I obtained my stare from. All welcome... ED!
Jeopardy music.
Seneerie: Ed is a hyena, now with a residence in the Pride Lands! He was born probably the sharpest hyena in the pack, but as a tiny little guy, he suffered some SEVERE brain damage. Hmm, sounds like a story that could suit someone else around here, too. But that's okay! It doesn't keep us from doing anything. And - sighs I CAN'T THINK OF A GOOD OPENING LINE! mock sobbing Heeeeeelp me...
Cameraman James: How about something simple. Like on Channel 3! Something real snazzy and old-fashioned, like "Reporting from Live Copter PLSA, this is Pride Land Information Source!"
Seneerie: But that's so boring! It sounds so practiced, rehearsed! It doesn't sound live enough! I don't want my viewers to think that I PRACTICED MY LINES!
Cameraman James sighs
Seneerie: How about... "Here, on PLSA, Reporting from Live Pride Rock 48, that is Pride Land Information Source!"
Cameraman James sobs
Seneerie: looking at wrist as though a watch is there Hmm... he's late. Ed? ENTER ED!
we hear a considerable amount of noise outside the room, amid "go! Go in there!" from someone who sounds suspiciously like Banzai, Ed enters; Jeopardy music ends
Seneerie: FINALLY!
Ed: Hur hur!
Seneerie: ED! You're here! Congratulations on actually making it here, buddy. About half my interviewees don't actually make it into the building!
Ed looks concerned and tears well up in his eyes
Ed: Huh... Uh uh! Uh ahna oh ohme! Ah ee! Ah ee! Uh ahn uh ah ee! translation : "Huh... no no! I wanna go home! Mommy! Mommy! I want my mommy!"
Seneerie: pulling Ed close Aww... don't cry! It's okay! Ah ee's here!
Ed: sobs Ah ee...
Seneerie: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway, on with the interview!
Ed stares blankly for about an hour (come back in an hour)
Seneerie: I'm getting bored.
Ed: Ee ooh. translation; "me too".
Seneerie: So let us get on with the interview!
she hugs Ed, both make their way to the table
Seneerie: So erm... Ed. What was your former home like?
BTW, I'm gonna stop doing translations. You's just gona hafta figger 'em out yo'self. If you can't figger 'em out, good for you. Neither can I. But Seneerie can.
Ed: Ehn I uz oung, ih uz ate. Ut en I ot ol'er, e'rytin' an'ed.
Seneerie: Everything changed when you got older? How?
Ed: Ih all ee'ed app'n ight a'er I ot 'ain amage.
Seneerie: Why? Did someone give you a dog-treat? What was happening around that time?
Ed: Ehll, 'ar ol' ee at A'ah-ee ook' o'er uhs 'hyee'uz, 'n 'en ee all ot roke 'n 'r an' urned oo aste'an.
Seneerie: Turned to wasteland? Your land turned to wasteland after Ahadi made you broke? Why?
Ed: Y oul' I 'ow? I 'ad 'ain amage. Ehll, ih idn' eally amage y ain un'il la'er.
Seneerie: If your brain wasn't like, damaged until like, later, then why didn't you know what was goin' on?
Ed: ev'al art answer. Un? I uhz a uhb. A 'hyee'uh uhb, ut s'ill a uhb. Oo? E'ryone uhz a'raid I uhz ona et ain amage, n' so ey ar'd or ee oo uch oo ell ee uht uhz oin' on.
Seneerie: leaning toward Ed is there a three and four? A five, maybe?
Ed: 'Ere's a ree an' or. Oh ive. Ell, ree ih at oh un ells ee any'in, uhz I oos ee oh art. I uhz ah eally art hyee'uh. An or ih at ih a ime e'een ehn I ot iht ih uh eh an uh ime I ot ain amage, I oozally uhz ih ain. I oozally aa eh'ay. I uhn ahna ow uht oin' on en.
Seneerie: Hmm, just like Scar... so much resemblance between you two. Oh, yeah, and me, after listenin' to you talk. pops a pain reliever Anyway, can you tell us who you like?
Ed: Uh? I ain' ike o un! Ot oh un!
Seneerie: Aww... do you like... Scar? Ooh! Are you gay?
Ed: blushes Ehl... ay ee.
Seneerie: ah-hah... sure! I'll have to ask him in my interview! Scar and Ed, sittin' in a tree! L-i-c-k-i-n-g! First comes love, then comes begging, then comes Nala in a cub carriage!
Ed: Uh? Oh! I 'ate 'ara'ee'a!
Cameraman James: Er... getting in a tight condition here. End of transition! waves arms in front of screen, which goes static. Snow. Switch to Seneerie and Ed screaming maniacally as they get covered in snow
Seneerie: Christmas is white in America - it's not white in March in Africa! OR February!
The Closest We Can Get to the End Without Seeing Seneerie Freeze and see Ed scream like the maniac he is. Besides, we don't want to 'ear 'E'eerie oan an omplay a'out er eh'ay eh'yore. An ere eally ad in ow. El-ie ee, I ow.