Disclaimer: Same as always, I own nothing but my plot and characters. Nothing of J.K. Rowling's is mine.

A/N: WAZZUP POPTART! lol...thought it would be funny to call Gilderoy Gilderoy Poptart...I own that name Dog Gammit! The Poptart part not Gilderoy...No, I don't own Pop-tarts...but I like the name a lot...it just...fit...oh and I don't know what the hell a deathly daryen is...but it sounded funny.

Chapter 22: Boggart Birthday

February first, the day of my birth. I awoke feeling horrible as I looked outside to see a blizzard brewing. Why did it have to snow on my birthday?

January passed fairly easy. Snape and I hadn't fought all month.. Hermione called me a teacher's pet, which was pretty bad since she is one herself. She never got on Snape's good side though. All of my other classes went by smoothly too. I learned to cope with Gilderoy Lockhart's excessive happiness. He isn't annoyingly happy, but joyous enough to make you want to smile. That's why his new nickname is Gilderoy Poptart. As for Draco the Ferret Boy Wonder and I, we don't talk, look, or think about each other. This is fine because I am currently busy bringing my grades up..(More like sucking up.)

Today is my birthday. I told Hermione in the middle of January and she wrote it down. She said that I would have a party in the Gryffindor common room and I could invite anyone I wanted. When I asked how I would go about having another house in there, she told me Seamus and Neville would yet again be bouncers. Laughing, I admitted that I didn't want a party. For some reason I feel that she didn't take me seriously. Perhaps it's because when I wok up this morning I found a birthday card resting on my pillow. It was signed anonymous... No doubt it was Hermione. That would be odd though, for it said 'Happy Birthday to the girl I love and admire, hope to see you soon..Love, Your Secret Admirer.' Hermione wouldn't of written that she loved me..

"Happy seventeenth Birthday, Maranda!" The Gryffindor table roared with birthday greetings. I felt my face get hot with blushing as I sat down with an emberassed grin planted on my face.

"Thank you, very much, for that warm and emberassing greeting. If you were any louder, my face would've had an alergic reaction from blushing so much." No sense in lying about the way I felt. I honestly thanked the Gryffindor table, but threw in loads of sarcasm..Just my style.

Hermione laughed, "You know you liked it. Wait until tonight. There's no way you can escape what we have planned for you."

"Yeah," I disagreed, "I could stay in the library all night."

"And get detention hence breaking your inncoent streak?" Ron retorted.

I gave up, "Good point.."

First class was Defense Against the Dark Arts with the Poptart. I entered and sat next to Seamus, as this was now my permanent seat. Hermione, Ron, and Harry sat a few rows in front of Seamus and I, so I could still chat with them. Since I had been partnered up with Seamus in Potions class, and since we sit together in Defense Class, we've been becoming pretty close friends. He is really witty, smart, and knows how to insult Snape behind his back without being noticed...Perfect personality in my perspective. I like Seamus as a friend, but I could tell he liked me more than that. I wouldn't bring it up, but he had no hope trying to make me like him in that way. I didn't need anymore problems with guys.

Gilderoy Poptart walked ...wow, I can't even think without laughing at that name... Ahem. Gilderoy Lockhart walked through the Defense doors with his normal giddy mood embedded in him. He made his way to the front of class and grinned broadly like he had just used some happy-pill or got a gigantic raise in salary.

"I heard this morning," He started gossiping, "That it's someone's birthday."

Blast you, Hermione for having everyone scream Happy Birthday to me this morning!

"I would love if the birthday girl stood up.. Come on, Maranda Maguire, stand up so we can all sing Happy Birthday to you!" Poptart just wouldn't give up, would he?

"This isn't happening," I mumbled under my breath. I took a deep breath and stood up. Every single Slytherin started chuckling at my humility.

"Now," Gilderoy declared, "We shall all sing to you! Let's sing class..."

The class' rendition of Happy Birthday was utterly horrifying. The Slytherins purposely sang out of tune just to spite me. But they didn't hurt my feelings. In fact, they made me feel much better. At least they didn't mean Happy Birthday to me.. I didn't want the class to sing in the first place, so before sitting back in my seat I smiled sarcastically at the Slytherin side of the room.

"Oh, how wonderful," Sarcasm was my best friend..(Would that make Snape my best friend? He is sarcasm, after all.) "You Slytherins sounded so fantastic! You know, you all should record your voice and sing that again. Thank you for making my day complete! I now have your perfect voices in my head! Grand-freaking-tastic!"

Sitting down, I realized all of the Gryffindors began to laugh at my horrible insults towards the Slytherins. This factor made my morning.

"See," Gilderoy stared at me, "It wasn't bad now, was it? Miss Maguire, you're very lucky to have your birthday today because it's review week, and you can choose what the class will go over first. So, what would you like to go over?"

What in Merlin's white beard was Gildie talking about? My choice to pick something to review? Was this some kind of lame birthday present? I literally pinched myself to make sure I wasn't having an awful nightmare.

"Miss Maguire, if you can't think of anything, then pick from these few that I'll list for you." Gilderoy sounded like a bad nursery rhyme but kept talking, "I was going to pick boggarts or deathly daryens today, and then go on from there. How about it? Pick one of them.."

"Uhh..." I didn't want to see something deathly, "Boggarts it is.."

Hermione's hand raised in the air and Lockhart picked her, "Professor Lockhart, are we reviewing everything from our past years at Hogwarts?"

"Yes," Poptart answered, "Dumbledore requested it be done in this class because of the change in teachers every year. He said he hoped I would be the Professor for at least a few years, so I should review everything with my classes to make sure there isn't any confusion on a topic."

"Oh, I see," Hermione sounded a bit let down...Like she wanted to leanr somethnig new. I did too, but a boggart was something new to me. I had no clue what it was in the first place.

"Everyone stand up and come over here to the trunk." Gilderoy directed everyone to a clear spot in the classroom where a large. black trunk was trembling and shaking. Standing next to it was Lockhart, who finished his speech, "Now, everyone should know what a boggart is, but as I've been informed about some of your knowledge, I will refresh your memories. A boggart is a shapeshifter. It can morph into anything it wants, so long as it scares the victim. Usually, it will only form into what you fear the most, but on occasions it will change into something a whole group is afraid of. I've witnessed that one. . ... So, one at a time you will step closer to the trunk and I will let out the boggart. Once it changes into what you fear the most, just think of something that will make you burst with laughter, and cast the spell, Riddikulus with your wand. Have your wand at the ready..Who will go first?"

"I will," Neville volunteered for the first time this year. He must've had a good experience with this the last time he did it.

Stepping up to the trunk, Gilderoy unlocked it as Neville walked a few steps forward. At first, nothing happened, but soon enough, two masculine hands pushed the trunk open. Just as a mirror image, boggart Snape escaped the trunk. Something inside of my stomach jumped as the boggart Snape stared at our class. His eyes then fixated on Neville, as he stalked nearer to him. Neville readied his wand, took a deep breath, and shouted "Riddikulus!"

Boggart Snape spun around and changed from wearing all black to wearing a navy leotard and shining, silver tiara. The class laughed, except for me, and Snape boggart started to change as Hermione stepped forward. I didn't find a man in a leotard funny because...well...it just wasn't funny!

Hermione smiled as the boggart transformed into a piece of parchment with her name on it. She looked at it, and saw a large, fat 'F' on the top. Her fear was a bad grade? She swished her wand in the air, yelled Riddikulus, and the paper stayed the same...but with a different name on it. She glanced at it again and the name changed to Harry Potter's. Everyone, including me, started to giggle. Hermione stepped back and grabbed my shirt sleeve.

"Your turn," She ordered as I was pushed to face the boggart.

At first, the boggart spun and whirled around awkwardly. I didn't even know what I was afraid of...until I thought of it.. With a sudden hault, the boggart dropped to the ground as a big black blob. It grew larger and soon imitated the silhouette of a man. No face, no clothes, no eyes nor mouth, just a silhouette. I lost my breath...I lost my voice to scream as it swept up to me, hovering over me. I gaped at it for a moment before I realized it was touching my stomach. The room was silent.. I raised my wand, but couldn't think of anything to make me laugh, not even smile. One last look from the silhouette before I felt myself grow weak...