L2: JIMMY EAT WORLD!!! ("If You Don't, Don't")

Special Disclaimer: Don't own 'Napoleon Dynamite'. Or his tots. Or Jimmy Eat World lyrics, for that matter. Or Keane. (a special time limited 20 points for whoever can find all those referencesin this chapterhehehe)

Chapter 12: Finding the Connection

"What do you mean?!"

Gandalf nodded gravely while the others stared at him in disbelief.

"I am afraid that it is true." He sighed. "They have been taken…"

He was, of course, referring to the unfortunate misfortune of Gimli, Boromir, and Sam, who had disappeared from the school's premises.

Merry and Pippin looked at each other for a second before bawling.

"Oh, Pippin, hold me!"

"Oh, I will!"

Legolas' eyes enlarged, and he scooted his chair farther away.

Gandalf cleared his throat:

"It seems we have no ---"

Frodo interrupted him as a realization suddenly dawned on him. He pointed at Merry, who was busily crying into Pippin's arms.

"He-he said ---"

Gandalf immediately set upon Merry and Pippin after taking a minute to pry them apart. "What did you do now?!"

"No, no, it's not that ---"

Gandalf turned to look at Frodo with a questioning glance. "Then what is it?"

"He said…Pippin."

Frodo clapped his hand over his mouth, and his eyes widened. He said it again.

"Pippin." He grinned. "Pippin! Pippin!" He began dancing around the classroom, and Legolas found himself backing into the farthest corner he could fine.

Merry and Pippin joined Frodo in his wild dance, and Aragorn finally spoke.

"It may be that the powers of the CCC Ball have begun to wear off. Perhaps…we too…will begin to disappear?"

Gandalf nodded and then stretched forth his hand. "Give me your tots."

"What?" Aragorn looked at him, his face suddenly pain stricken. He felt his hand fall protectively towards his pocket.

"Give me your tots." Gandalf's voice grew sufficiently firmer. "They are necessary."

Aragorn looked away painfully as he obediently but unwillingly reached into his pocket and pulled out its squished-potato contents. Gandalf eagerly swiped them and stuffed them into his mouth.

Aragorn's own mouth hung open in incredulity. "You said they were necessary!"

Gandalf shrugged, his mouth full of the taters. "Shey were. I cansh shink wheh I ah hungwy."

Aragorn slunk away to a corner of the room to sulk.

Gandalf cleared his throat after a minute. "Now then. I guess the only thing we can do is wait." He grinned. "Who will be the next to go, I wonder?"

.o.

"Hey, Kat."

Legolas sat down slowly beside her on the cold, empty bleachers where he always knew to find her. She didn't respond for a while, and Legolas shifted in his seat, suddenly nervous.

"Won't you get your stories straight?"

"W-what do you mean?"

"I've heard you're leaving. For good."

Legolas shrugged and looked away when she turned to face him.

"I've heard you wouldn't have told me."

He felt his ears go red. "Yeah well, hehe, no idea where you heard ---"

Her voice turned rather dry. "Oh, no reliable source. I mean, it was only from you when talking to your other 'friends'."

"Kat, I'm sorry!" Legolas shivered at the words he had never said before. "I just ---"

"If you don't, don't!" She exclaimed before stiffly standing and walking off the bleachers, leaving behind a very confused and regretful elf.

.o.

"Gimme that!"

Merry grabbed the meterstick from Pippin's hands and measured himself against it.

"What does it say?"

Pippin squinted at the numbers.

"Depends."

"Depends?!" Merry glared at him.

Pippin shrugged. "You want centimeters, meters, feet, inches? I can do the calculations easy, but which ---"

Merry screamed out words he most certainly did not learn in the Shire and left.

Pippin shrugged and followed him out, muttering, "Well, five feet is better than three…"

.o.

"You want my advice?"

Frodo mocked a gasp and kept walking, Legolas trailing not far behind him.

"Don't be all snobby about this. I just ---"

"Snobby? Okay. Fine. Don't come to me asking your girl questions." Frodo made sure to raise his voice.

"Hey, could you be quieter?" Legolas flushed and said through his teeth, "I don't want everyone to know…"

Frodo rolled his eyes. "Okay, what is it?"

"Well, I sort of…I like this girl…"

Frodo scoffed. "What? As opposed to a boy?" He stood on his tiptoes for a second, peering into the side of Legolas' head. "By the way, your ears are pointy."

Legolas groaned. "Can we stay on topic, please?"

Frodo shrugged. "Fine."

"All right. Now. I was just, uh, wondering…well, I've noticed you and Mabel ---"

Frodo suddenly grew stiff. "You're not still after her are you? Because I will have you know, she ---"

Legolas shook his head quickly. "No, no. It's someone else. But I was just asking you because, well, you and Mabel…"

"Are perfect for each other?" Frodo smiled, his ears turning slightly pink.

"Well, yeah. How did you do it?"

He grinned. "I found our connection…"

"Your link?" Legolas' eyes narrowed. "What would that be?"

"I can't tell you!" Frodo exclaimed, stepping back. "Are you trying to steal our ---"

"No, no," Legolas hurriedly interrupted. "Just, what do you mean?"

Frodo was not listening. "Though actually, it might not hurt. After all, it's not like you could possibly have the same one." He paused and whispered slowly with dramatic emphasis, "It's…somewhere only we know."

"What?"

Frodo sighed impatiently. "Somewhere. Only. We. Know. Got it? Good."

He left, and Legolas was left yet again, very confused.

Luckily for him, however, Pippin walked by, singing obnoxiously with his headphones on. And Legolas felt the relieving dawn of realization.

Shrieking with excitement, the elf ran down to the school library. Pippin, who had stopped singing, shrugged and went on:

" 'So iiiiff you have a minute why don't we go…talk about it somewhere only we know…' "

.o.

A/N: Yeah…sorry it took so long again. But yay! Shout-outs! (Practically everyone guessed right to the 3 who were missing…hehehe…easy, but THESE questions are harder (see above ) hehehe…oh, and the first person was…irukapooka! Congratulations!)

Irukapooka --- Yes, randomness does most certainly rock. Hehehe…thanks for reviewing! And reading some of my other fics…those seem to have been written so long ago, I'm willing to bet they're horrible. Well, thanks again! Sorry I didn't update earlier…I'm ::cough:: a slacker…

Hobbitgirl11 --- Yes, you are back! It's fun to see old reviewers… Hope you feel better! (You probably are better…that review was from…lesse…eek! September…)

Turwaithiel --- Nah, I don't blame you. I've just come across many homicidal Mary-Sue killers…it's quite scary actually. And you will have to remind me to stick in some more Green Day before the end…I was in a Jimmy Eat World mood today…but actually, just before that, it was all Green Day! Remind me! But anyway…thanks for reviewing!

Dunthonwen --- Yes! Do check out Dashboard! Hehehe…yes, sleep is good…and are you from the north? I know just one other person who uses wicked as an adjective…you people are so weird :: shakes head :: hehe I kid, I kid. You are very cool. :: grin ::

Ms. L. P. Weasly --- Did you see?! I am SO loyal to reviewers! Hehe…and Legolas even likes her…just tell me you like Jimmy Eat World. :: grin ::

Leap --- I know! Who detests Green Day? Only snobby elves…

Bberry06 --- Thanks! It's people like you who actually make me update…

Kagomehigurashi12 --- YAY! A fellow anti-Figwit fan! Yay!

Margarita --- Haha, I'm glad to help you out of your school misery then. It's awesome reviewers like you who keep me going!

Silvren ithildin --- The toilet thing has come back, has it not? I know…I would have forgotten…well, thanks for reviewing!

Lariencalaelen --- Thanks for reviewing! Yes, I know…I took a while. I'm lazy…

Shadowedwolf13 --- Thanks for reviewing! I most certainly am holding out for more :: evil cackle ::

AngryTolkienPurist --- Thaaaanks! It's nice to know I'm not completely shaming him… :: cough ::

Manwathiel --- Yeaaah…it's been like ages to me too. I'm lazy…very bad. Hehe, lo siento! Christmas break is almost here…I'm holding out…

Ha! --- Hehehehe…I can be a retard, can't I? (You know, of all the insult-ish reviewers, I doubt any of them actually read my comments…oh well)

Valarauko --- Thanks for reviewing! Like I've said before…still working on the funny part, but glad that it's working!

Mistymixwolf --- Yay! :: claps :: You got it right!

LoNe Elf --- Thanks! I am…continuing this fic…but if not for reviewers, I so would just be all, well, I know the ending and am too lazy to write it…

Lady Kaori --- You had better update soon! Gosh. Your reviewers must be fainting from lack of you, right now…hehe…

RainyNightz --- Hahahaha…don't worry, there are too many Legolas fans for me to dislike them all. Glad you can stand to watch him be tortured.

ChildofGod-4ever --- Hahaha…yeaah…I never liked :: cough :: Arwen…but I know it would only be right to leave her there…hehehe…or not…well, anyway! Frodo and Mabel are good together…that's because I love Frodo hehehe…oh! And you shall find out about the CCC ball! :: grins ::

Orlando's Hot Chick --- Thanks for reviewing! :: huggles ::

Aragorn waits for Arwen --- I guess I always wondered about them coming here…but it was more of like, hehehe…me daydreaming…yeah. Once upon a time I got a crush on Frodo…except he was only in the movies…very sad. This helps, no?

DracoScrewer --- DUDE! Do NOT give me that image. Bad bad bad. Hehe. And tig is SO great! Yay! And I saw the fiancée thing, and it got me wondering…very odd reviewer that you are hehe…I kid I kid :: grins ::