Disclaimer: My life has not since ch. 2 changed.

A/N: I got nutin' to say…

Chapter 3: Pathetic

"Ground control to Major Tom!"

"What? Why are you making David Bowie references all of the sudden?"

"Um, look and see, young child."

Rory walked over to the window where her mother was having a panic attack and realized why.

"Oh no."

"Yeah, that's what I thought you'd say."

"Oh no. We have a new neighbor. He looks very…"

"At a loss for words?"

"Uh huh…"

"Same reaction. Oh, and guess what."

"What?"

"He's going out of town."
"That's a good thing…why are you making it sound like it's not a good thing? Make it sound like a good thing!"

"Okay! Okay already. Well, he's going out of town…and he is very picky about his lawn…and I couldn't get out of it, I mean if I could I would have. But the grass and the water…"

"What? You make no sense woman."

"We're in charge of watering his lawn for the next week."

"We, or me."

"Well…"

"Mom! How could you?"
"Well, technically, I can handle it for 6 days, but I have a meeting on Friday, and he has a very, very strict watering schedule, and he just got divorced, so this lawn is all he has."

"Since when have you cared about other peoples feelings?"

"I asked myself the same question…"

Pause. Silence.

"I need coffee," Lorelai stated.

"Me too."

"And we're off to Luke's."

"The crowd goes wild."

"Loser buys the winner coffee?"

"You're on."

And so the girls raced out of the house.

Lorelai won, being the more coffee driven of the two.

"Ha! Now go get me my coffee."

"Hey! I am supposed to pay, not order," Rory pointed out.

"Yes, but I am the mother, without me, you would be nonexistent, therefore, you must go order."

"And I was so looking forward to you and Luke arguing about your lifespan…"

"Hardy har-har."

However, it was not Luke who greeted her at the counter, but Jess.

"Oh, hey Jess."

"Rory."

"Um, can I have two coffees?"

Without reply, he reached for the two largest coffee cups and filled them to the top.

"Thanks."

"I work here."

"I see that," she said as she turned and walked over to her now "caffeine deprived"(yeah right, like that's possible) mother.

"Evil child. You have deprived me of my caffeine fix. Now I must sell you to the gypsies and use the money to buy a speedier child who is in less need of caffeine than you so I get more."

"I didn't raise me."

"And for that you should thank me."

"Thank you."

"Aw, you shouldn't have…no, you should have."

"There's the Lorelai I know."

"Be happy I'm not Emily Gilmore."

"All happiness shall ensue."

"Much rejoicing everywhere."

"Let's go sing Partridge Family Songs."

"Come on get happy."

"You know I was kidding, right?"

"Yeah, just kind of going with the flow there. Got a little lost in thought…"

"Understood."

"We are really pathetic, aren't we?"

"Yep."

"Just checking."

Luke and Jess observed the scene from the counter thinking about how unbelievably fanatical those Gilmore girls really were.

They were both in love, but too egotistic to realize it.

Well, with a family name like Danes or Mariano, what more could you expect.

Were talking about Jess, the boy Pride wonder and Lucas Danes, who Ripley, believe it or not folks, dubbed the world's most stubborn man.