"Folks, if you've just tuned in, you have missed one hell of a game," the ESPN announcer reported to the microphone. "It has been back and forth the entire night, and I along with everyone else in this booth have been wondering if the clock will finally strike midnight on the Dumples' season. One minute left in the fourth, and CGNU leads by four, but Louisville is threatening inside Dumple territory. A field goal is moot, though; the end zone is the Redbirds' only option at this point."

Both sides line up at the line of scrimmage.

"Kellerson looks downfield…scrambles a bit…throws to the end zone!"

Marzipan, playing cornerback, saw the ball in the air and immediately took off toward that part of the field. She jumped up, and got both of her nonexistent hands onto the ball, landing onto the ground with a thud.

"It's intercepted! The ball is intercepted! The Dumples have won Conference USA!"

Strong Bad downs the ball a few times, and the game is over.

"Marzy, you did it!" said the coach happily.

"It's not over yet, you guys," replied Marzipan. "We got our bowl game to worry about now."

"What bowl are we going to be in?"

"It depends. Unfortunately, since we're not in a top-tier conference, we'll probably get the shaf"-

Just then, Marzipan looked upward and gasped. ESPN2 was on the provided television, and she saw a score on the ticker at the bottom of the screen: Texas 31, Oklahoma 16.

"That makes things very, very interesting."

"What are you talking about?" asked Strong Bad.

"Oklahoma's loss means that there are no more undefeated teams in Division I. There are now five teams with one loss each competing for two spots in the national championship game. That includes us."

"So…are we going to make it?"

"Sadly, I don't think so. Like I was saying, since we're not in a top-tier conference, we'll most likely get the shaft when it comes to these things. We've done all we can, however. Our season is over. All that's left to do is sit and wait."

For the next week, everyone was on pins and needles wondering if they would get the berth. Strong Bad sat by the phone for hours waiting for the bowl selection committee to call him and inform him of what bowl the team would receive. Finally, he realized that he needed to get his mind off the team, taking out a pen and some scraps of paper.

Teen Girl Squad!

Cheerleader! (Cheers for the Dumples!)

So and So! (Calculates their finances!)

What's Her Face! (Wants on the team!)

The Ugly One! (Mascot!)

Cheerleader: Hey girls, the Dumples game is on!

So And So: Since when is it cool for you to like football?

Cheerleader: Um…uh…IT JUST IS DAMN IT!

What's Her Face: I think college football is awesome.

Cheerleader: Don't make it worse, baggy pants!

PYLON'D! What's Her Face is squished by a falling 20-foot tall end zone pylon

The Ugly One: She should have punted.

PUNT! The T-Rex come out of nowhere and punts The Ugly One

The Ugly One: Dag, I guess.

Cheerleader and So And So are watching the game

Cheerleader: That Strong Bad is my favorite.

So And So: Yes, he is easily the best football player in this universe or any other.

PARALLEL UNIVERSE!

sharp cut to a parallel universe. Everything is the same except Cheerleader is wearing So And So's clothes and vice versa

Cheerleader: It's true.

DEWORRA!

arrows shoot tail first out of nowhere and piece them both

So And So: Ow! Our parallel skin!

It's Over!

"Ahhh...comedy," said Strong Bad pleasantly. "Wait…that didn't take my mind off the team at all!"

Just then, the phone rang.

"Yes? ... This is him. … Thank you. Thank you very much."

Strong Bad, smiling, immediately called Marzipan.

"Hi, this is Marzipan. I'm out observing the sad futility of non-coniferous trees in winter, so leave me a message."

beep "Hello, Ms. Pan. This is Steven Repoman calling you to inform you that you haven't been paying any of your bills. I won't bother to list any of them individually, since you're simply not paying any of them. However, I'll let you off the hook if you allow one of my esteemed representatives who bears an uncanny resemblance to that The Cheat creature that lives around your parts but, I assure you, is not The Cheat to take some of your things. Y'know, like a cassette player, or a stereo, possibly a Colecovision if you've got one of them stored away, something cool like that. Just leave the door unlocked tonight, 'cause he'll be over around 1 a.m. This is Steven Repoman, signing off."

"Heh-heh-heh…oh crap! I forgot!"

beep "Uh, hi, Marzipan. I wanted to tell you that I got a call today, and we're in the national championship game against USC! I know this is so exciting for all of us, and I want to assure you that this is not a crank call, like that Repoman call I gave you a few minutes ago…which is yet another example of a call that is real and certainly not a crank call, and also one that I didn't actually make, but…heard through…my new astute amplified hearing device I have invented. Yes, now everyone can have audio surveillance on whomever they want at the push of a button, thanks to me! I'd show you the prototype, but Strong Sad just spilled some sort of Gloom Cola on it, so I can't. However, I will punch him later on. So, like I was saying…championship, girl! USC!"

A month later, the Dumples arrived at the Rose Bowl, the site of the 2005 National Championship Game. Once there, they met up with an unexpected fan.

"Hey! Strong Bad!"

Strong Bad looked and saw a person wearing a mask similar to his. However, unlike some of the paper masks he had seen lately, this one looked real. Strong Bad walked over.

"Hey. Who are you?"

"You don't know who I am? Well, I suppose you wouldn't know who I am since you've never seen me before. People call me Stinkoman. I'm from Free Country, too, but from the year 20X6!"

"20X- what?"

"I found this newspaper in a time box talking about a championship football game. I don't know what football is, but the pictures made it look like some sort of fighting challenge. Challenges have been scarce lately, so I went back in time X1 years to check this out!"

"Wait. If you're from the future, do you know who wins?"

Stinkoman laughed uncontrollably.

"I take it you don't know."

"Of course not! A challenge of fighting is boring if you know who will win before it begins. Good luck though!"

"Thanks…I guess. … That was weird."

The team made its way inside the stadium and suited up.

"Okay," said Coach Z, "I suppose since I'm the coach I should make some sort of speech. I must admit, though, I've never done anything like this, so bear with me. As good as this team is, USC is at least our equal. I won't lie. I also won't lie in saying that there are a lot of fans and reporters out there who don't think this team has what it takes. But what do they know? They are just fans. They are just reporters. I am your coach. I know that we may be equals in skill, but this group has enough heart for ten teams. Heart is what has gotten us through this season. Heart is what has allowed us to win 12 straight. Heart isn't something that shows up on paper; it can't be categorized or represented by a number. But heart is what will win us this game. Now go out there, and give those fans the greatest frortball game they've ever seen!"

"Um…I'm sorry, coach," said Homestar, "the greatest what?"

"You know what I mean!"

And with that, the Dumples took the field.