A/N: Okay, so I realized that I haven't updated in a really, really long time. I also realized that this story has no plot. And then I thought… oh, plots are overrated anyway. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter!
Van Helsing and Dracula were locked in a staring match. "It's mine bloodsucker. Don't even think about it."
Baring his fangs, Dracula hissed back, "I think not, you Halfling mutt. I've already claimed it." The opponents stared at each other for a long time, waiting for the other to strike first.
They dove for the last can of Mountain Dew at the same time.
Unfortunately, the can rolled off the coffee table and bounced onto the floor, skidding into the hallway and all the way down the stairs. Looking back up at each other, they dashed out of the room after it. Helsing jumped onto the banister and slid down, catching the can as it rolled across the entryway floor, and was promptly tackled from behind by a very angry bat-man. They wrestled on the floor for a while, jostling the can more, neither of the two getting a solid grip on it. Rika and the others watched the spectacle from a safe distance at the top of the stairs.
Just when they thought the fight would never end, Helsing pulled the tab on the can, an action that was met with a gasp from Shara and a scream of "NOOOOOOOO!" from Rika. But he pulled anyway, and sprayed the fizzy concoction all over Dracula's face and his own.
Hissing, Dracula flung himself away and tried to wipe the soda out of his eyes. "Gah, it BURNS!" he moaned, tripping on a rug and landing sprawled on his back. Kyain grabbed a towel from the bathroom and threw it down to him.
Wiping his face off, Dracula stood and straightened up. Realizing that, at this vantage point, he was vulnerable to attacks from squealing, leaping, monkey-girls, he threw his arms over his head and ran into a dark corner, eyes darting around.
Meanwhile, Helsing stood and brushed himself off, wiping away the fizzy remains of the soda explosion. Licking his lips, he wandered away to find another Jell-o heart to eat.
Everyone else remains speechless and blinking, then go back to what they were doing. Dracula sneezes and wrings his hair free of leftover soda. "The worst part of it is that now I've got this damned stuff in my nose."
A/N: Okay, yeah. This is really, really short. I'm thinking of changing my chappies to about this length, so that I can start updating once a week. Let me know if that seems reasonable enough! Hope you enjoyed this odd little escapade.