Title: This is My Life, pt 6
Author's Note: Faith's POV
&&&&
It was amusing to me that over the next few weeks I had plenty of helpers to care for the baby. Among the staff were Albus, Poppy and surprisingly Minerva. From the students were Harry, Dante, Hermione (when she wasn't studying), Draco stopped by on occasion, and a few others that I never could remember their names.
Snape helped a lot too, I mused. He made sure that I was sleeping and taking care of myself. His theory was that in order to care for a child, I had to watch over myself and he helped with that. I noticed that he began calling me by my first name rather than 'Miss. McRae' and I found that I liked the familiarity.
There was so much that I needed to thank him for, but he didn't want my thanks. He was a private man with a lot of secrets so he only offered it when we were in private. I understood, Albus mentioned something about his huge job, but nothing more. It was a secret and I wasn't going to be sticking my nose in his private business, especially if it could possibly kill him.
The snow was beginning to melt as I sat in my common room with Harry, while Connor slept in my room. I had decided that it was time to talk to him one on one.
Hero to heroine.
The Chosen One to the Boy-Who-Lived.
Slayer to…well you get the point.
"So Harry, tell me about your plans." I began the unnerving conversation.
Harry shrugged. "I had thought about being an auror like my parents had been."
"Any traveling in your future?" I asked after a few moments, as if making sure he wasn't going to elaborate.
Harry chuckled softly. "You're new at this, aren't you?"
"Well they don't make guide books, I'll tell you that." I snorted, blushing slightly at being caught.
"You never did say why you're here." Harry started, green eyes curious.
"Well there are a lot of reasons why I'm here." I shrugged. "One of which is to help you, though I'm not sure how I can help."
"Ah." Harry nodded. "Dumbledore hasn't told you about me or the war."
"Oh no, he's told me everything." I said. "I made sure of it before I came with him. He actually had been asking me for months before I actually followed."
"Why's that?"
"I had a lot of healing to do." I answered casually. "Plus I'm not a baby-sitter, or at least I wasn't, but a Slayer."
"Slayer?"
"I fight demons, vampires and the forces of darkness."
"Oh."
"Exactly. I can't kill humans."
"Why?"
"It tends to throw me off." I answered. "You see, Harry, I have killed before. It was during a patrol and I was torn."
"How?"
"Well part of me said it was an accident and that there was nothing I could do." I said. "The other half kept saying that it felt good to hold that man's life in the palm of my hand."
"What'd you do?" Harry asked me softly.
"Well, I joined up with the local evil." I stated getting a pair of wide green eyes staring at me. "I did a lot of bad things that I'm not proud of, Harry, but I'm a different person than I was. It took a coma and fight with Angel to wake me up."
"Angel? The guy that was here?"
"Yep, though he's a vampire with a soul." I replied casually. "He's got a lot of experience in guilt and killing. He's a good vamp."
"Must be."
"He got me to release all my anger causing me to brake down." I began softly. "I was on my way back to Boston where my life began in hopes of finding myself."
"Then what?"
"Well after I broke down I felt a bit better. I took months of seclusion and doing patrolling for me to finally except Albus' offer. Even longer for me to trust myself around people let alone children."
"That first day."
"Yes, that was the first time I had seen anyone besides Albus for months and I nearly killed you by choking you to death." I mused softly.
"And now how are you?"
"Better." I replied meeting his gaze once more. "I wrote out everything I'd ever done in my life that I was guilty for and placed it behind me. I know it's there but now it can't haunt me."
"Why?"
"I've taken away its power." I said. "You see, when you're guilty the 'demon's' will haunt you until you loose everything you have. When you accept it as fate or destiny or even that it happened you've taken back your will."
"I understand."
"Good." I smiled softly.
"So what now?" He asked curiously.
"I suppose I should train you in self-defense without your wand." I answered. "Have you had any experience in fighting?"
"Only to protect myself from my cousin." Harry muttered, but I heard him anyways.
"I'll teach you what you need to know." I decided. "I'll also try to help you understand that you're not just mirthlessly killing someone but doing it as your destiny."
From that moment we began training in self-defense and I could see the difference in the way Harry carried himself after the first two weeks. We trained three days a week opposite of his Quidditch practices and I made sure he kept up with his schoolwork.
Connor kept growing and getting more active as time moved on. Draco and I were still on speaking terms as he confided in me. I was a bit skeptical at first but I had seen the changes in the snarky prat who didn't want 'Gryffindor wanabes' at his table.
It was an odd morning that I woke gasping for breath. I had just seen what Harry described to me as Voldemort with his pale skin, glowing red eyes and the snake like nostrils.
Climbing out of bed I checked on Connor who was fast asleep in the bassinet that Minerva transfigured for him. I brushed a lock of brown hair off his forehead before moving the blanket to cover his small form before exiting the room.
I passed into the large room when I heard someone talking to my statue. I laughed when I heard some of the passwords the voice tried but stopped when I heard the desperation in the voice.
"Harry?" I questioned after opening the door to find the young man leaning against the other wall.
"You dreamed it too." He replied knowing it was true. I nodded and allowed him entrance. He seemed relieved to be in the comforts of my room. It wasn't that it was bright and cheery, because it wasn't. My rooms were done in wine and champagne and very harmonious.
"Did you want something to drink?" I asked moving towards the fireplace that flared to life from the moment I entered the room.
"Butterbeer, if I could."
I smirked at his choice of drink and called the kitchen. "Two butterbeers, please." I requested from one of the house elves and it appeared within seconds. Handing the opened bottle to Harry I sat down curling my feet underneath me.
I watched as Harry glared at the fireplace while drinking the butterbeer, not saying a word. It was comfortably silent between the two of us, knowing that nothing needed to be said.
"I hate it."
"I understand."
"Why me?"
"Because you're strong enough to handle it."
"How do you know?"
"I've watched you the past few months." I answered carefully. "I heard the Sorting hat wanted to put you into Slytherin and how you chose to be in Gryffindor. It's the everyday or life altering choices that make us who we are Harry. Those choices help us when something is flung at us and others can't understand the consequences or see the rewards, but we have to."
"I don't see any rewards."
"You're life Harry." I said softly. "The chance to be free, the chance to avenge your parents death and the world are the rewards. It may not seem like something great when you do it, but you're saving everyone. It's a big thing."
"I suppose."
"Let me tell you a story, Harry." I started. "There was a young woman who was called to be the Slayer. She was fifteen years old, had two loving parents and was popular in her high school. Once she began her training her parents began to fight, her friends ditched her and she was left alone. She ended up trapping a gang of vampires in her school gym and setting it on fire."
Harry watched and listened to me with adept attention. I wondered if I was doing the right thing by telling this story, but in the end I knew it would help him.
"Her parents divorced and her mom and she moved to a small town that just happened to be on top of a hellmouth. The slayer of course didn't know this, but was excited to start in a new school and new life. She'd given up slaying saying she'd quit she didn't want the calling anymore. It was sometime later, she had gone back to slaying, met a vampire and two good friends that stood by her no matter the danger."
I could see Harry trying to figure out if this story was about myself, but I knew it wasn't. He would too.
"Then one day, she over heard her watcher and the vampire talking about a prophecy. A prophecy about her." I took a breath. "The prophecy stated that if she went up against a master vampire on such a night she would die."
Harry's eyes got wide and was about to speak, but I held up my hand quieting his inquiries.
"She was sixteen and she walked knowingly into the hands of the master vampire. She died and was revived by CPR. But by then the damage of dying had altered her mind." I finished. "The point is Harry, no matter what prophecy's say something so tiny, as friends, to big, as knowledge, could change the tides."
"Was this story about you?"
"I wish." I said sadly. "No it was two slayer's before me. She's still alive, her name is Buffy Summers."
"What kind of a name is Buffy?" Harry mused.
End pt 6
