Author's Note: Answer to a question I received, Kali is fourteen. This chapter is rated PG-13.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

My eyes slowly open and I see Abby sleeping beside me? Huh? Then I remember sneaking in here last night. Her arms are still wrapped around me and I feel calm. I cuddle closer to her let myself feel comforted. I never had a mom; Abby sometimes played that role for me, along with being my sister. But soon her eyes open and see me staring at her.

"Hi sweetheart," she says in her whispery voice.

"Good, morning," I reply softly.

"You okay?" she questions.

"Yes, thank you for letting me sleep here last night," I mumble, somewhat embarrassed.

"No problemo you're a snuggly person," Abby laughs. I giggle and role over to check the time.

"Oh my gosh it's 10:20! I'm late for school!" I exclaim while jumping out of bed and dashing for the shower.

"Kali it's a PA day, there's no school remember?" Abby's voice calls out just as I'm about to step into the shower. Oh yeah. I slip my pajamas on again and go back to Abby's room.

"I knew that," I unconvincingly tell her as I peek my head into her doorframe.

"Sure you did. Now go make me some coffee please," she instructs me and wraps herself deeper under the blankets.

I make my way to the kitchen and start the coffee. While waiting I turn the heat up a tiny bit as the phone rings.

"Hello?" I answer it.

"Hey Kals, wanna come hang out this afternoon?" Julie asks brightly.

"Um okay sure. When and where though?" I inquire.

"Amy's, they guys might show up too. Scott says he misses you," she says pointedly.

"Well I hope he's there because I'll be there. Is three okay?" I suggest.

"Sounds great, see ya then girl," she says.

"Okay bye," I hang up.

I pour out some coffee, add the sugar and milk and bring it back to Abby.

"Who was that?" she asks as I hand over her coffee.

"Julie, she wants to hang out this afternoon," I explain, crawling under the covers beside her in an attempt to get warm.

"Okay I'm on at three so I can give you a ride," she offers.

"Great, but we're going to Amy's," I say, happy that I wont have to walk in the cold.

"Alright, I'm off at three in the morning though so I can't pick you up. How about you go to Carter's after his shift, I'll give him Amy's address and he can pick you up," she tells me.

"Sounds good, but what time is he off?" I ask.

"Um ten I think," she tries to remember.

"Perfect," I grin.

……………..

Music is already blaring as I walk up the steps, I know they wont hear me if I knock so I let myself in.

"Kali!" Julie shrieks with delight as I take off my coat.

They're all sitting in the living room and all sorts of alcoholic drinks are everywhere.

"Hey how's it going?" I greet everyone.

I grab a bottle of something a take a huge gulp. Knowing that I'll be drunk in an hour or two comforts me, being somber makes you think about things too much…

"Hey sexy, I haven't seen you since Saturday," Scott says, getting up and placing his hands around my waist. I wrap mine around his neck and we share a sweet, long kiss. Our friends hoot and cheer. I break away with a cheeky smile.

"I missed you," I whisper.

He doesn't reply but takes my hand and pulls me towards the back room. Amy winks at me and I giggle as I follow Scott. He closes the door and pulls me to him. I take another swig of my drink and press my lips against his. His tongue caresses mine and he holds me tightly. We stumble towards the bed I hear the bottle break as I drop it on my way down to the bed. My hands are roaming his body and I think that maybe this will help me forget. Just maybe. He's pulling my black sweater off me, I'm fumbling with his red shirt, and I feel so… focused. But what am I doing? This was not Kali who adored her older sister, Kali who was independent and dealt with things. No this was a Kali who would do anything to forget awful things. I wasn't this girl!

"Stop!" I cry, sitting up and pushing Scott off me.

"What baby?" he asks is a raspy voice.

"No, I don't want this, I can't I'm sorry," I kiss him lightly and pull my sweater back on.

"Kali c'mon babe, what's wrong?" he tries to pull me back.

"I have some things to think about!" I call as I rush out of the room, make a pit stop at the door to put my coat on and dash out the door. Ignoring my friends' shouts.

I hurry down the street and try to think of somewhere to go and what to do. I soon realize that Ray and Neela live a block away. So with renewed energy I head towards their place.

………………….

"Yes?" Neela's voice crackles over the intercom.

"Neela it's Kali, can I come in?" I beg.

The reply is a loud buzzer and I quickly open the door and down the halls to their apartment.

The door opens before I knock and Neela ushers me in with a look of concern.

"What's wrong?" the British doctor asks me.

"I was at a friend's house and things got a little out of hand so I took off. I hope you don't mind," I say shyly.

"No, no of course not," she replies quickly.

I nod and my body slumps against the couch.

"Do you want to take a nap?" she offers, already tucking a blanket around me.

"Thanks Neela," I mumble sleepily and drift off.

The doors crash open and Susan walks out. I watch her from my place on the floor. Then the door swings open again and Neela follows Susan down the hall.

"Dr. Lewis," she calls.

"What Neela," Susan turns on her heel and Neela stops just in time.

"I- I just wanted to see if you were alright," Neela offers.

"No Neela, I'm not alright. That's Abby in there, and she obviously went through something tonight. And we can't help her!" Susan screams.

"It's not your fault," Neela tells her quietly.

"IT IS MY FAULT!" Susan shrieks and falls to the floor in tears.

Doctors and nurses gather around and comfort her, no one is with Abby now. I go in and stand by her side. Abby's eyes blink and open, they stare at me unfocused. Fear.

I shake her and she doesn't look at me. She's looking through me… I'm not there. I sneak off and go home alone.

"Abby!" I bolt upright and my eyes are wide. Neela is instantly beside me.

"What's wrong Kali?" she inquires, gazing into my eyes.

"I was there, that night, that Abby was…" I break off as tears start running down my face.

"Oh sweetheart," she hugs me and I sob into her neck.

"She looked so scared, so different," I chock out.

"Shh, shh, it's okay, she's alright now. Kali I'm so sorry, no one knew you were there," she says into my hair.

"She never talked to me about it, she dealt with it herself, I couldn't help her," I say between sobs.

"I know, I know, she didn't let anyone help her. We all wanted to, but she wouldn't let us, it's what she wanted to do," Neela explains softly.

I pull away and look into her eyes. She offers a gentle smile and I swipe at the tears on my face.

"Let's go to the hospital and talk to Abby," she says and pulls me toward the door.