Chapter 9

I think I must be one of those people who is a nurturer. At any rate, I seem drawn to the people who most seem to need me, and Lupin, or Moony as he and Harry soon had me calling him, certainly qualified. Harry had told me about him long before we ever met, about his being a werewolf, with all the implications that go with that. I suppose I had some trepidation about meeting a werewolf face to face, but having done so I came to realize a 'werewolf' wasn't who Remus Lupin really was. He was one of the kindest, gentlest men I had ever met, and the saddest. Any real happiness he may have had in life seemed to be tied up in his schooldays and his friendship with Harry's father and mine. Now those friends were dead and one who had been counted a friend by them all was a traitor, to them and to wizard-kind in general. Harry was really all he had left that brought him any joy. And I soon came to love him as much as Harry did.

About a week after our arrival, Ron and Hermione joined us for their visit, and I think the musty old house where we were staying brightened a bit. I certainly saw greater cheer in Moony's eyes than I had any day previously. Living virtually alone in this dreary place, which turned out to be my father's ancestral home, must have been extremely lonely for him. Granted this secret society to which he belonged dropped in now and then, but still, much of his time was spent solely in his own company.

I wasn't in the room at the time, but apparently Professor Dumbledore had sent word that Professor Snape was unable to make more of a potion for Moony; one he needs to take in the week preceding a full moon if he is to avoid transforming into a werewolf. Instead he only becomes a common wolf and retains his senses so he pretty much just sleeps it off until morning, not being a danger to humans. When I entered the kitchen a short time later, I walked into a spirited discussion of my potion-making abilities.

Hermione turned to me instantly and entreated me, "You will try, won't you?" She seemed to have forgotten that I had just entered the conversation and had no idea what she was talking about.

"Try what?" I asked, noting that all eyes were on me.

"To make the Wolfsbane Potion for Moony," she answered. She handed me a piece of parchment on which ingredients and directions were shown and I looked it over carefully.

"This is awfully complex. I'm not sure I can..."

But she cut me off, "I know you can do it. I'll help. Please. If he doesn't drink this, he'll transform. At least try."

Lupin seemed a bit embarrassed by her entreaty, "It's all right, Deandra. I don't expect you to..."

"Do we have the ingredients?" I interrupted.

Hermione nodded, "Professor Dumbledore sent them along with the instructions."

"Well, it can't hurt to try. Only thing is, we won't know for sure if I do it right until we see if he doesn't transform."

"Professor Dumbledore wants us all to leave tonight and come back in the morning," Ron explained. "Doesn't seem to have much confidence you can do it."

"Oh, Ron, I'm sure he has confidence in Deandra. He just wants us to be safe," Hermione admonished him.

I turned to Moony, "But will you be able to tell if it worked or does someone else need to watch to find out?"

"I should be able to tell," he said, though he didn't sound totally convincing.

"Well, I'll give it a try, but I'm staying here to find out if I did it right or not," I declared.

Moony objected immediately, "No! I can't risk your life over this. You'll go with the others."

Harry saw the look on my face and knew Moony was doomed to lose this argument, but he only smiled down at the floor and said nothing. "We'll see," I replied.

Hermione and I chased the men out of the kitchen and set up the cauldron. It took well over an hour to work our way through the formula, carefully step by step. Finally, we finished and Hermione went to find Moony to come take a look and see if it at least looked, smelled and tasted right.

He gave it his stamp of approval, but then suggested we head off to Ron's home, the Burrow, now and come back in the morning. Without comment, I set about preparing dinner as if I hadn't heard and Hermione soon joined me. Harry shrugged helplessly at Moony and took a seat at the table, followed by Ron. Moony protested our staying but Ron explained, "You don't know her very well, yet, mate, but when she makes up her mind about something, you might as well get out of the way and leave her to it."

I think Moony was going to argue, but he thought better of it and sat down with the guys. As we put the meal on the table a short time later, I leaned close to Moony and said, "Don't worry. We'll take precautions, in case something goes wrong." I don't know if that made him feel any better or not, but he didn't object further and, in a way, I think he was grateful for the show of support from us all.

Later that night, I had Moony take me upstairs and we chose a suitable room to lock him in. I made sure there was food and water he could get to, if he wanted it, and a blanket to lay on. Then I gave him a quick hug and sealed him in the room for the night, promising to come back and let him out after daybreak.

The four of us sat up talking til almost midnight. Hermione and I were sharing a room, but after I heard her breathing slow and knew she was asleep, I took my blanket and pillow and returned to the hallway outside Moony's cage. I knew that if he had transformed, I should be able to hear his rampaging through the door, but all was quiet. I settled on the floor for the night, not wanting to leave him alone, even if he didn't know that I was there.

I don't know what time it was when Hermione awoke and found me gone. She must have awakened Harry when she couldn't find me and he tracked me down. I know it must have been close to dawn because when he sat down to join me and put his arm around me, I stirred enough to know he was there and glimpse the sky beginning to lighten through the grimy window in the room across from where we sat. I snuggled into his shoulder and went back to sleep.

Ron and Hermione showed up around 7:00 and woke us both up. I was completely stiff and sore from my nighttime vigil on the floor; Harry, too, to a lesser extent. We stretched and yawned as Hermione asked expectantly, "Well?"

I grinned, "Not a sound. Must have done the trick!" I stood up and unsealed the room so we could enter. Moony was curled under the blanket on the floor, seeming none the worse for the night. I stooped down and gently shook his shoulder, and as he began to wake, asked, "You hungry, or do you want to go sleep longer someplace more comfortable?"

It took a moment for him to wake enough to register the four of us hovering over him. Then he sat up with a smile. "Apparently Hermione's estimation of your potion-making talents is completely warranted," he said approvingly. "And you're certainly a more pleasant potion-maker than Snape..." He let the sentence drift off as we all laughed agreeingly.

We headed downstairs for breakfast, which Hermione insisted on making alone. Moony dressed and joined us soon after.

Later that day, my vigil on the floor caught up with me and I ended up napping for almost two hours. When I awoke and went in search of the others, I came upon Harry and Moony talking in the parlor. They looked up when I entered, and Moony stood, gave Harry's shoulder a squeeze and left us alone. I went over to the couch and curled up next to him, still not fully awake. He wrapped his arms around me and whispered, "Moony was just telling me how special you are, and how I better make real sure I don't let you get away from me!" I hugged him back and murmured, "I like him, too."

I think I must have fallen asleep again, because I awoke with a jolt a short time later when Ron and Hermione came in. They were leaving the next day to go join their families for Christmas, so we decided to celebrate together that night and exchange our gifts.

Awhile later, I told Harry I needed at least an hour alone to wrap gifts and do some other things, and he promised not to let anyone come bother me. I headed to the uppermost floor in the house and put my plan into action. When I returned, almost exactly an hour later, I was carrying Christmas gifts for all of them. They had been busy decorating the parlor. Moony had acquired a tree from somewhere and they were adding the last few ornaments to its branches.

After a quick dinner, we adjourned to the parlor to open gifts. As Moony's resources were limited, he was only able to give us small token gifts, but we knew they came from the heart. I don't think he really thought he would get any gifts from us, except maybe from Harry, but Ron and Hermione both had gotten him something. And he seemed especially astonished when I handed him a gift from me.

"How on earth did you happen to buy me a gift when you hadn't even met me, yet?" he murmured, beside me on the couch. I just smiled secretively and answered, "I'm just full of surprises!" He wasn't about to argue that point and turned his attention to unwrapping the box on his lap. His astonishment returned when he found the dark blue sweater nestled among the tissue paper.

"I thought it would go well with your eyes," I commented.

"How do you know what his eyes look like?" asked Ron from the floor, where he sat with Harry and Hermione, his mouth full of chocolate frog.

All heads had turned toward me and I just shrugged, "I always look at people's eyes. It tells me about them."

"So, what do you see in Moony's eyes then?" Ron persisted, staring at Remus' face.

I hadn't expected the question and I hesitated to give a complete answer, so I merely told him, "I see great kindness."

Ron squinted his eyes and stared deeper into Moony's eyes, then shrugged, "Okay, if you say so. They just look like eyes to me."

I think Moony suspected I hadn't answered Ron's question completely because, when the others turned back to their gifts, he leaned over and teased, "And what else do you see in my eyes?"

Without thinking I answered truthfully, "Sorrow. I see incredible sorrow."

He sat back quickly, the smile fading from his face and I heard his sharp intake of breath. I reached over and took his hand in mine, giving it a squeeze of reassurance. I knew I had seen more in his eyes than he ever expected, or intended, and I knew that I was right about what I had seen. He just hadn't believed it showed. He managed a weak smile after a few moments struggle to regain his composure. "I'll have to pay more attention when you say you see something in someone's eyes," he commented.