Chapter 14: What does it mean to be a mother?
(Week Three, early Day 7)
With a gasp, May sat up in bed. She was breathing hard and her eyes were
wide. "No. It can't be. I couldn't have been," she whispered in
disbelief, still stunned by the dream...no, memory, that had played
out behind her closed eyelids.
What jogged the memory, she still wasn't sure. In all honesty, the
day before had been rather rough. Besides the fact that she was still
beating herself up over how she handled the whole Mamoru situation, she
had lost her temper and gotten into a shouting match with Yusuke AND
confronted the empress's time walk, all before noon.
The walk back after that talk with Pluto, the empress's time walker,
was tense. It was pretty obvious that Yusuke was angry about the situation.
He growled the whole way "home", occassionally throwing May an angry glance.
After they returned to the mansion where they had been living for the past
six days, Yusuke went directly to the gym and began to beat up on the
punching bag hanging in one of the corners. What Terry was feeling was a
little harder for May to judge; it was a weird mix of mourning, brooding,
and anger. He was completely silent on the way back to the mansion and he
had a rather remote look in his eyes. Upon returning, after sitting and
staring into space for a while, he joined Yusuke in the gym as well. And,
although a lot of noise came from the gym that night, none of the noise
held raised voices from an argument between Yusuke and Terry.
While Yusuke and Terry were taking their anger out on gym equipmenmt,
May slept. If she were more honest with herself, what she actually
did was hide. She really was not asleep for most of the time she was
horizontal, but as long as she appeared asleep, Terry wouldn't let
Yusuke harass her. At some point, however, all the stress, guilt,
anger, and helplessness caught up with her, and the resulting exhausion
put her to sleep. And that is when the memory started.
At first, May did not think she was dreaming. She sat at a table covered
with paper filled with writing and thought, for a brief moment, that she
was back to working on her thesis and that her death and the last three
weeks was the dream. Then she noticed that the papers were not coding
sheets, but held names that she did not recognize. She looked down at
what she was wearing and saw the skirt of a green court dress instead of
jeans. At that point she realized it was a dream of her past life, or a
"memory-dream" as she had begun to refer to them in her head. And, so far,
it had been the clearest dream she had had.
A door opened and in walked a man who was the epitome of the phrase tall,
dark, and handsome. He was causually dressed, but somehow May knew that
he was important. It was something about the way he carried himself that
screamed leader. Interestingly enough, he also looked a lot like Mamoru
and Terry, although he was clearly older. He looked about 47 or 48, but
for some reason May thought that he may be older than that. The appearance
of silver hair at his temples just served to make the man
appear more distinguished...and more attractive.
"Good morning, Adaunde," the man said as he walked over to where she
was sitting.
"Good morning, love," May heard herself reply as the extremely attractive
man bent to kiss her on the check. As the man walked to the other side
of the table and sat down, May marveled at his attractiveness.
But the person she was in this memory-dream obviously had something else
on her mind. "By the horizon! Terry, how did your mother accomplish
this task, after every party no less, for years and years with only the
assistance of your father? Already I am feeling dizzy and overwhelmed
and we have yet to begin!"
To say May was a little thrown by her dream self's statement would be an
understatement. First, she was extremely confused that she called the man
Terry. 'That is definitely NOT McGinnis, even if they do look alike,' May
thought to herself. She also had some problems following the conversation
because her speech, Adaunde's speech, was so formal. There were no
contractions, no recognizable slang...no short-cuts in communication. It
took a little longer to sort through the statement. In fact, because of
her various confusions she almost missed the reply from across the table.
"She had practice," the man called Terry replied. He glanced down at
all the paper on the table. "Also, she was more organized and she
invited fewer people as well."
May felt herself huff. "Terrius, we are celebrating 15 years of peace,
are we not? A peace that we would not have accomplished or maintained
without our military officiers or our trading collitions. It seemed
only correct and respectful that we invited some of them to our celebration."
"My wife, the reformer."
May heard herself laugh. "You are aware of how I feel about barriers
between people caused by titles, position, or class, are you not?"
The man, now identified as her husband, smiled...almost as if he was
remembering something. "Yes, Adaunde, I am."
"But, returning to this massive task," May's dream self, Adaunde,
continued, "Did you manage to entice our two youngest to assist us?"
"Well..." Terry trailed off.
"If they do not come, I shall find them and force them to make an
appearance! If they will not assist me because I am their mother,
they will assist me because I am-" but whatever Adaunde was about
to say was cut off as the door opened again. This time two young
men walked in the room; young men that May immediately recognized
as Terry McGinnis and Yusuke Urameshi. Yet these young men seemed
taller and...well, happier. Terry still moved with his Batman-like
grace, which surprised May somewhat. And it was amazing how Yusuke's
face changed when he smiled.
"Tremaine, Arlington. How kind of you to put in an appearance,"
Adaunde said.
"Momma, you DID order us to appear, remember?" Arlington said as
he crossed the room to sit down. "It wasn't really a choice."
"I did not 'order'! I just strongly recommended that you come."
Adaunde countered.
"Same thing," Arlington mutterred under his breath as he sat down.
"Good morning father, mother," Tremaine said as he bowed to Terrius and
kissed Adaunde on the cheek. After sitting, Tremaine quipped, "I
am home for the first time in several moon cycles, and Mother
immediately puts me to work!"
"What are mothers for?" Adaunde laughed. "Besides, His Grace,
the Duke of Amerwest, should not be the only person who is allowed
to 'strongly suggest' your assistance," she continued.
Terrius smiled sympathically at Tremaine. "I am surprised that
you were not expecting this. Accessing her children for labor is
the one arena where her majesty will pull rank." The three males
in the room laughed as Adaunde responded with a seemly childish,
"I DO NOT!"
After the laughter died down, Adaunde continued. "Pulling rank
or not, we do have a lot of work to accomplish and we do appreaciate
your help." She sighed. "The best way to do this is probably to
divide tasks. Tremaine, I shall need you to-" but the task assignment
was never given as the door opened for the third time.
Another young man walked into the room...a young man that May
eventually recognized as Mamoru. This recognition was not as
instantenous as her recognition of Terry and Yusuke. In some
ways this young was almost the opposite of the Mamoru she met.
He seemed more carefree in some ways and he moved with an in-born
sense that he was important. Yet, while he seemed happier overall,
there was also a sense of insecurity around him, as if he knew
a big responsibility lay in front of him and he was unsure if
he was up to the task. And he also seemed a little...nervous
about something.
May wasn't alone in her surprise at Mamoru's appearance, but
everyone in the dream, including her dream self, seemed surprised
for a different reason. For a moment the room was completely
silent. Then Adaunde finally asked, "Endy?"
The young man bowed "Good morning Mummy, Da."
"So, you have come to help us?" Terrius asked quietly.
Endy took a deep breath. "Yes," he replied. The young man looked
at the others in the room that he had not noticed before. "Tremmy
and Ling usually help? And you manage to get things done?" he asked
as he ruffled Tremaine's hair.
"Hey!" Arlington objected.
"Oh, ha, ha." Tremaine replied as he tried to evade his older
brother's hand without getting out of his chair.
With that Endymion sat down next to Adaunde, who quickly turned to
him and asked, "So who is she?"
"Who is she?" Endy echoed, confused.
"Yes, who is she. The girl that you have deemed worthy of a fourth
gift. That is why you are present, correct?"
"Well, yes," Endy answered as he began to look embarassed, "but I did not
think that you would ask about it this bluntly."
"Endy, sweetie, I am your mother. And I am known for many things, but
tact was never one of them." May felt herself smile. "So who is
she? Is is one of the merchants daughters who was present last night?
Or was she one of the military daughters? Mila, the daughter of General
Kyta is such a nice young lady-"
"Actually, Mummy, she is lady."
"Well, do not hold us in suspence, heir apparent. Reveal who is she
already!" Arlington said.
Endy took a deep breath and then he said a name, really just three words.
"Lady Daniella Waynemeyer."
"Nella?" Tremaine asked, shocked.
"Anthony and Talia's daughter, Daniella? She is a very refined lady. And
she is rather responsible. She may actually be good for you, Endy."
Aduande said.
"Our son is interested in a lady born of one of the most powerful houses
on our planet. It seems that your eldest will not be quite the class
reformer that you are, Adaunde," Terrius smiled.
May felt herself shrug. "Endy was always more like you anyway," she
replied. "Anyway, I actually like Lady Daniella and her family. I must
if I am willing to allow Tremmy to study under Anthony. Regardless,
Taila has been a good friend and their other daughter, Beryl, is such
a well-behaved little girl."
"But...Nella?" Tremaine asked again. "Why Nella?"
"Because Dani...well she props me up in places where I fall. I know that
does not make sense, but..."
"Yes, it does," Terrius said quietly. "I picked your mother because
she seemed to see beyond my title and we were looking in the same
direction, which is what I needed, what I still need. Your mother
is my eyes. Daniella seems to be your foundation. It may be hard
to put into words, but the heart understands."
At that point Endy opened his mouth to say something else, but the dream,
slowly faded away...until all May saw was black. Then she shot up in bed
and uttered her shocked whisper.
Now she sat in her bed as various ideas ran around in her head.
Throughout the dream she was called Adaunde, her majesty, mother,
mummy. She was bowed to. She talked about titles and rank and...
the only conclusion that made any sense was that she was married
to this Terrius, that she was some kind of royalty, that she...was
the mother of Mamoru, Terry, and Yusuke in their past lives. That
she was the former queen of earth.
As that revelation pierced through her head, May found herself again
worrying about Terry and Yusuke. But this worrying was different from
the previous worrying she had done. She wondered if they were okay,
how they were taking things, if they had had the same dream and how
they would react to it. Having an overwhelming need to check on them
both, May shot out of bed, grabbed her robe and ran to her bedroom door.
She wretched it open and quickly stepped into the hall, where she froze.
Further down the wing, Terry and Yusuke were also in the hall outside
of their rooms. They had obviously been sleeping previously, but they
seemed wide awake at the moment. May stared and them and they stared
back. The hall was silent for a few minutes.
Terry broke the silence with a simple question. "Mother?"
"You had that dream too?" Yusuke asked quietly.
"Oh God," May said in quiet prayer as she grabbed the cross that she
had not removed since she first put it on before coming to this dimension.
For the last six days the cross had been her lifeline as a translation
device, but now she clung to it because of what the symbol meant to her
in her last lifetime. She took a deep breath and looked at the confused
and wary young men in front of her. "We need to talk."
*****
About ten minutes later, Yusuke, Terry and May were sitting around
a table in the kitchen. They each had a cup and saucer in front of
them. Tea bags and instant coffees were arranged in front of them
and a kettle was on the stove. There was also a pound cake and
plates on the table, but no one appeared to be hungry. They were
all still in shock.
Yusuke broke the silence. "What was that dream we had?"
"I don't think it was a dream so much as it was a memory. A memory
of our past lives." May
answered.
"So that older man in dream, he was-"
"Your father, yes." May said.
"Who is he now? I mean, you are our mother, so our father is somewhere
in your life, right?" Terry asked.
May shook her head. "No. At least not to my knowledge. I - let's just
say I was single before I took this mission. I always was single, and I
always will be."
"That's a little cryptic." Yusuke observed. May didn't answer.
"But our father was probably reborn too, right?" Terry asked.
May nodded. "At least, I think he was," she amended.
"And, since Maxine is in my dimension, Daniella is in this dimenion
with our brother, and I assume Lady Keiko is in Yusuke's dimension-" Terry
looked over at Yusuke for confirmation. Yusuke nodded. "Then," Terry
continued "I would assume that our father was somewhere in your dimension."
May thougt about Terry's logical proof. If it was taken as a given that the
former king of earth was reborn and that there was some pattern to their distribution...
May mused the rest of her thoughts aloud, "It makes sense. But I never
met him." After a moment of silence, she reflected, "You know, we all haven't changed
too drastically. Terrius was very much a royal; more than likely he
was reborn as one."
"Are you attracted to any members of royality in your dimension?"
May laughed quietly as she got a far off look in her eyes. "There was one.
Heir to the heir of the British throne. Tall, blond...not really my type
but something just pulled me to him. Well, in the sense that I was attracted
to him. I never met him. I didn't move in those circles." May blinked
several times and then looked down at the table.
After more silence, Terry said, "Daniella, I mean Reika, recognized you,
didn't she? She knew who you where."
"She must have recognized me at some point. Maybe by something I said." May shrugged.
Silence fell again. The three people around the table looked down at their empty
tea cups again. There was so much to say, but it was really hard to say anything.
With this one piece of new information about their past, their present was turned
on its head.
May raised her head to say something, when the tea kettle started to whisle. Rising
to get the hot water, May took a few calming breaths. 'At some point, one of us has
got to ask about what we do with what we know now,' she thought to herself as she poured
the hot water. After sitting again, May looked around the table at the boys who were
once her sons. It was near impossible to tell what they were thinking...but the fact
that Yusuke was so quiet worried her.
"Yusuke, are you okay?" May asked quietly.
"What do you think, lady?! I mean, Mom. I mean...what the hell am I supposed to call
you?!" Yusuke burst out.
May looked at the boy who was once her youngest child. Although he was exploding over
what to call her, it was obvious that his concern was deeper. What he really wanted to
know now was how to treat her. In many ways, up to this point she had been like a peer,
or a "crazy lady" who was the one who had the map, so you followed because you had to.
Suddenly, with one memory, she had become someone who should be afforded a lot of
respect. How does one reconcile that? May couldn't help to have pity on the boy. "You
could call me May," she offered. May looked at Terry and Yusuke both. "In a past life
I was your mother. I am not your mother now. That was another life. We are different
people. Sure, we are still tied together. And yes, we should take this chance to
spend time together...but you don't have to show me any additional deferrence. Besides,"
May laughed, "if the two of you started to be overly respectful, I'd probably have a
heart attack from the shock!"
Terry smiled and chuckled slightly. Yusuke grumbled a little under his breath, but he
seemed a little more at ease.
"So, what do we do now?" Terry asked.
"Well, to be honest, I don't know," May replied. "We still have a week. Honestly, there
really is no point in me sending you back early. We could get to know each other in
this incarnation. We could try to piece together the past. We could..." May trailed
off as she thought.
"Why don't we go check out your world?" Yusuke said, sounding a little disgruntled.
"Huh?" May asked.
"I mean, you got to see our lives, right? You moved around in our dimensions. So,
we should get to move around in yours."
"Yusuke has a point," Terry said. "In watching our lives you really got to know
us. We should get a similar chance to get to know you. You could almost give us a
guided tour of your world. What it's like, what you do-"
"Yeah. It only seems fair," Yusuke pushed the point.
"No." May said.
Both boys blinked and fell silent at her definite refusal.
"Do you not want us in your life? Are you trying to distance yourself from us?" Terry
asked after a few minutes of silence.
"No, of course not! Terry, you and Yusuke both, mean a lot to me...to the point
where it sometimes surprises me. But my answer is still no. I can't."
"Can't or won't?" Yusuke demanded.
"Can't, damnit! I can't do what you ask because I'm-"
At that moment the doorbell rang, cutting off what May was about to say. The unexpected
noise startled them into silence. Then the doorbell rang again.
May sighed as she rose. "I guess I better get that," she said as she began to walk to
the front of the house. She didn't get too far before she realized that Yusuke and Terry
were flanking her. "Okay, why are y'all coming with me?"
"It's 4am, lady. Normal people do not show up at other people's houses at 4am. We
have to protect you." Yusuke replied.
May was about to protest, but then she decided to let it go. In their own way, they
were trying to act like appreciative sons; she needed to let them do this.
Finally, they reached the door. May unlocked the door and looked out into the early morning
to see who their visitor was. "Reika? What are you doing here at this hour?"
The young woman looked up at May with wounded and haunted eyes. "I don't have anywhere else
to go. Every time I turn around their is some memory of my broken engagement or of the
wedding that never happened in my past life or...I just can't take it anymore. I just
needed to talk to someone who would understand."
"Please, come in," May said as she motioned Reika into the house. "We were just about to have
some tea." May continued as Terry took Reika's coat and purse.
"Tea? This early in the morning?"
"Rough night," was Yusuke's explanation.
As Reika stood there, she noticed the slight difference in which Terry and Yusuke were
treating May. At moments there seemed to be confusion or hestitation. And they did
seem to be a little more respectful. Reika could only think of one reason why there
would be a change in everyone's behavior. "So, you remember who May was now, I take
it?" she asked.
"Yes," Terry said as he returned from putting away Reika's belongings.
"It was a little bit of a shock for all of us," May shared as the four began to walk
back to the kitchen. "We still really aren't sure how to handle our new found information."
As they re-entered the kitchen, Reika sat at the fourth seat as May pulled out a fourth
cup and saucer.
"Reika, maybe you can help us," Terry began. "We've asked May to let us get to know
her a little better, take us to her home, etc. She's refused. Maybe you can-" what
Terry was going to was lost as May slammed the cup down with a crash onto the counter.
Everyone in the room turned to look at her, but May kept her back to the table for
awhile. Finally, she said, "I never did tell you how I ended up with the task
of bringing together the royal family, did I?" She turned around and sat the cup
and saucer in front of Reika. Then she walked around to her chair and sank into it.
After a few more minutes of silence, she began to speak again. "I was a graduate student
in arts and sciences at a prestious public university. It was an April day, and I was
sick of my masters' thesis, this huge project that seemed to be sucking the life out of
me." She laughed briefly, but there was no joy in the sound. "That day, I decided
that I needed a walk, so I left campus and went wandering through the nearby neighborhood.
That was when I stumbled on the house fire.
"The scene was pure chaos. At first, I was just watching in a sick fasination, you know,
the same fasination that has us stopping to look at car wrecks. Then, I heard it. A
mother begging someone to save her baby, her child still trapped in the burning building.
"I wish I could say that would have been enough for me to act, but to be honest, it
wouldn't have been. People die in fires everyday. It is sad, but it not enough to get
me to do something crazy. But, you see, I recognized the name of the child still
trapped. I tutored her on occassion. She was such a sweet little girl, full of life
and energy...and I couldn't imagine a world without her. At least I didn't want to.
"So I ran into the burning building." By this point May's eyes were closed and she
had begun to shake, but she continued, "The smoke was so thick that I could really
see, much less breathe. The only thing I could do was listen for cries and try
to follow them, hoping that I found Melissa. I still don't really know how I found
her, just suddenly there she was. I picked her up and began to fight my way back
to the door, to get her out.
"The heat was intense. I fell several points on the way back. It was a struggle to
get up each time. I was sweating, so much so that I really couldn't see, even if there
was no smoke. But somehow I made it to the door. I...I think I handed Melissa to someone,
I really don't remember how she got over the threshold...but then, as I was about to
step out, I heard a cracking noise. I looked up, and then...
"And then I woke up. Well, okay, woke up is the wrong word. I was in a white room,
but not a hospital...and I was talking to an angel who told me I was dead. Then,
she gave me the chance to do this, to bring a family together." May laughed mirthlessly
again. "So, you see, I can't go back. I've been dead for three weeks." With that,
May finally looked up to look at the people sitting around the table.
Reika looked confused and even a little frightened. 'That's right, Reika doesn't
even know about my mission or my powers. It has got to be unnerving to hear
someone talking about their mission and dying when you thought they were just a
tourist who happened to be queen in their past life.'
Terry and Yusuke however, looked shell-shocked and wounded. They had both seen
enough craziness in their lives not to be scared, but what they were going through
had to be even more painful. She had presented them with a parent from this
last life, and then taken that parent away. 'Talk about a sudden death,' May
thought.
Finally, they began to speak. Terry started in denial, "No. I don't believe you.
You aren't dead. You can't be."
Yusuke, not surprisingly considering how he uses anger and scarcasm to cope, jumped
right to the anger stage. "Why the hell didn't you tell us this before?!"
"Because I didn't think it was important."
"NOT IMPORTANT?! You were our MOTHER, damnit!"
"Which I didn't know when I started this!" May burst out. "Do you really think this
is easy for me?! I'm dead. And I'm reminded that I'm dead in subtle ways everyday.
I died before I could marry. Hell, I hadn't even really dated. I died before I
could do so much. And then I meet you two...and then I realize that I'm your mother.
Then you ask me if you could spend time with me in my home and - and-" May put her
head in her hands and began to cry.
Yusuke was about to open his mouth to shout something else, but Reika shook her
head. She reached out to touch May's hand. May looked up, surprised. "I won't
pretend that I understand all of this," Reika said, "but it is clear that you need
a friend or three right now. A long time ago, you were there for me at my lowest."
She smiled. "I guess it is my turn."
"Thank you." May managed to get out.
Again the group fell into silence. And they sat there for a while in silence. Then
the conversations slowly began again. Conversations about the past, about the dream,
about the present, although they could not bring themselves to discuss the future. And,
long after their untouched water had gone cold, long after the sun had risen, the four
still sat around the table, talking, pausing...and by about midday they seemed to be
able to laugh again, at least briefly.
- to be continued -
Whew! That was a very hard chapter to write. Trying to figure out what the
real reactions everyone would have to the news was difficult. It took me
over two weeks to write the second half of this chapter alone.
As for the dream, I know it doesn't make a lot of sense here...but it would
make more sense if you have read some of "Royal Blue" which is the prequel
to this story. I promise that I'll get back to "Royal Blue" soon...well as
soon as my writer's block goes away.
Final note, if you have read chapter 13, you may want to go back and re-read it.
After talking to my editor, I've decided to cut a scene from that chapter, because
it was a little too pat and too unbelieveable. Writing believeable chapters is
getting harder and harder. Well, at least the story is almost over. There are
only four chapters after this one, and one is completely finished (two of the
remaining three have been started).
Happy reading and please read and review. The next chapter will be even harder
to write and I need all of the suggestions I can get.
(Week Three, early Day 7)
With a gasp, May sat up in bed. She was breathing hard and her eyes were
wide. "No. It can't be. I couldn't have been," she whispered in
disbelief, still stunned by the dream...no, memory, that had played
out behind her closed eyelids.
What jogged the memory, she still wasn't sure. In all honesty, the
day before had been rather rough. Besides the fact that she was still
beating herself up over how she handled the whole Mamoru situation, she
had lost her temper and gotten into a shouting match with Yusuke AND
confronted the empress's time walk, all before noon.
The walk back after that talk with Pluto, the empress's time walker,
was tense. It was pretty obvious that Yusuke was angry about the situation.
He growled the whole way "home", occassionally throwing May an angry glance.
After they returned to the mansion where they had been living for the past
six days, Yusuke went directly to the gym and began to beat up on the
punching bag hanging in one of the corners. What Terry was feeling was a
little harder for May to judge; it was a weird mix of mourning, brooding,
and anger. He was completely silent on the way back to the mansion and he
had a rather remote look in his eyes. Upon returning, after sitting and
staring into space for a while, he joined Yusuke in the gym as well. And,
although a lot of noise came from the gym that night, none of the noise
held raised voices from an argument between Yusuke and Terry.
While Yusuke and Terry were taking their anger out on gym equipmenmt,
May slept. If she were more honest with herself, what she actually
did was hide. She really was not asleep for most of the time she was
horizontal, but as long as she appeared asleep, Terry wouldn't let
Yusuke harass her. At some point, however, all the stress, guilt,
anger, and helplessness caught up with her, and the resulting exhausion
put her to sleep. And that is when the memory started.
At first, May did not think she was dreaming. She sat at a table covered
with paper filled with writing and thought, for a brief moment, that she
was back to working on her thesis and that her death and the last three
weeks was the dream. Then she noticed that the papers were not coding
sheets, but held names that she did not recognize. She looked down at
what she was wearing and saw the skirt of a green court dress instead of
jeans. At that point she realized it was a dream of her past life, or a
"memory-dream" as she had begun to refer to them in her head. And, so far,
it had been the clearest dream she had had.
A door opened and in walked a man who was the epitome of the phrase tall,
dark, and handsome. He was causually dressed, but somehow May knew that
he was important. It was something about the way he carried himself that
screamed leader. Interestingly enough, he also looked a lot like Mamoru
and Terry, although he was clearly older. He looked about 47 or 48, but
for some reason May thought that he may be older than that. The appearance
of silver hair at his temples just served to make the man
appear more distinguished...and more attractive.
"Good morning, Adaunde," the man said as he walked over to where she
was sitting.
"Good morning, love," May heard herself reply as the extremely attractive
man bent to kiss her on the check. As the man walked to the other side
of the table and sat down, May marveled at his attractiveness.
But the person she was in this memory-dream obviously had something else
on her mind. "By the horizon! Terry, how did your mother accomplish
this task, after every party no less, for years and years with only the
assistance of your father? Already I am feeling dizzy and overwhelmed
and we have yet to begin!"
To say May was a little thrown by her dream self's statement would be an
understatement. First, she was extremely confused that she called the man
Terry. 'That is definitely NOT McGinnis, even if they do look alike,' May
thought to herself. She also had some problems following the conversation
because her speech, Adaunde's speech, was so formal. There were no
contractions, no recognizable slang...no short-cuts in communication. It
took a little longer to sort through the statement. In fact, because of
her various confusions she almost missed the reply from across the table.
"She had practice," the man called Terry replied. He glanced down at
all the paper on the table. "Also, she was more organized and she
invited fewer people as well."
May felt herself huff. "Terrius, we are celebrating 15 years of peace,
are we not? A peace that we would not have accomplished or maintained
without our military officiers or our trading collitions. It seemed
only correct and respectful that we invited some of them to our celebration."
"My wife, the reformer."
May heard herself laugh. "You are aware of how I feel about barriers
between people caused by titles, position, or class, are you not?"
The man, now identified as her husband, smiled...almost as if he was
remembering something. "Yes, Adaunde, I am."
"But, returning to this massive task," May's dream self, Adaunde,
continued, "Did you manage to entice our two youngest to assist us?"
"Well..." Terry trailed off.
"If they do not come, I shall find them and force them to make an
appearance! If they will not assist me because I am their mother,
they will assist me because I am-" but whatever Adaunde was about
to say was cut off as the door opened again. This time two young
men walked in the room; young men that May immediately recognized
as Terry McGinnis and Yusuke Urameshi. Yet these young men seemed
taller and...well, happier. Terry still moved with his Batman-like
grace, which surprised May somewhat. And it was amazing how Yusuke's
face changed when he smiled.
"Tremaine, Arlington. How kind of you to put in an appearance,"
Adaunde said.
"Momma, you DID order us to appear, remember?" Arlington said as
he crossed the room to sit down. "It wasn't really a choice."
"I did not 'order'! I just strongly recommended that you come."
Adaunde countered.
"Same thing," Arlington mutterred under his breath as he sat down.
"Good morning father, mother," Tremaine said as he bowed to Terrius and
kissed Adaunde on the cheek. After sitting, Tremaine quipped, "I
am home for the first time in several moon cycles, and Mother
immediately puts me to work!"
"What are mothers for?" Adaunde laughed. "Besides, His Grace,
the Duke of Amerwest, should not be the only person who is allowed
to 'strongly suggest' your assistance," she continued.
Terrius smiled sympathically at Tremaine. "I am surprised that
you were not expecting this. Accessing her children for labor is
the one arena where her majesty will pull rank." The three males
in the room laughed as Adaunde responded with a seemly childish,
"I DO NOT!"
After the laughter died down, Adaunde continued. "Pulling rank
or not, we do have a lot of work to accomplish and we do appreaciate
your help." She sighed. "The best way to do this is probably to
divide tasks. Tremaine, I shall need you to-" but the task assignment
was never given as the door opened for the third time.
Another young man walked into the room...a young man that May
eventually recognized as Mamoru. This recognition was not as
instantenous as her recognition of Terry and Yusuke. In some
ways this young was almost the opposite of the Mamoru she met.
He seemed more carefree in some ways and he moved with an in-born
sense that he was important. Yet, while he seemed happier overall,
there was also a sense of insecurity around him, as if he knew
a big responsibility lay in front of him and he was unsure if
he was up to the task. And he also seemed a little...nervous
about something.
May wasn't alone in her surprise at Mamoru's appearance, but
everyone in the dream, including her dream self, seemed surprised
for a different reason. For a moment the room was completely
silent. Then Adaunde finally asked, "Endy?"
The young man bowed "Good morning Mummy, Da."
"So, you have come to help us?" Terrius asked quietly.
Endy took a deep breath. "Yes," he replied. The young man looked
at the others in the room that he had not noticed before. "Tremmy
and Ling usually help? And you manage to get things done?" he asked
as he ruffled Tremaine's hair.
"Hey!" Arlington objected.
"Oh, ha, ha." Tremaine replied as he tried to evade his older
brother's hand without getting out of his chair.
With that Endymion sat down next to Adaunde, who quickly turned to
him and asked, "So who is she?"
"Who is she?" Endy echoed, confused.
"Yes, who is she. The girl that you have deemed worthy of a fourth
gift. That is why you are present, correct?"
"Well, yes," Endy answered as he began to look embarassed, "but I did not
think that you would ask about it this bluntly."
"Endy, sweetie, I am your mother. And I am known for many things, but
tact was never one of them." May felt herself smile. "So who is
she? Is is one of the merchants daughters who was present last night?
Or was she one of the military daughters? Mila, the daughter of General
Kyta is such a nice young lady-"
"Actually, Mummy, she is lady."
"Well, do not hold us in suspence, heir apparent. Reveal who is she
already!" Arlington said.
Endy took a deep breath and then he said a name, really just three words.
"Lady Daniella Waynemeyer."
"Nella?" Tremaine asked, shocked.
"Anthony and Talia's daughter, Daniella? She is a very refined lady. And
she is rather responsible. She may actually be good for you, Endy."
Aduande said.
"Our son is interested in a lady born of one of the most powerful houses
on our planet. It seems that your eldest will not be quite the class
reformer that you are, Adaunde," Terrius smiled.
May felt herself shrug. "Endy was always more like you anyway," she
replied. "Anyway, I actually like Lady Daniella and her family. I must
if I am willing to allow Tremmy to study under Anthony. Regardless,
Taila has been a good friend and their other daughter, Beryl, is such
a well-behaved little girl."
"But...Nella?" Tremaine asked again. "Why Nella?"
"Because Dani...well she props me up in places where I fall. I know that
does not make sense, but..."
"Yes, it does," Terrius said quietly. "I picked your mother because
she seemed to see beyond my title and we were looking in the same
direction, which is what I needed, what I still need. Your mother
is my eyes. Daniella seems to be your foundation. It may be hard
to put into words, but the heart understands."
At that point Endy opened his mouth to say something else, but the dream,
slowly faded away...until all May saw was black. Then she shot up in bed
and uttered her shocked whisper.
Now she sat in her bed as various ideas ran around in her head.
Throughout the dream she was called Adaunde, her majesty, mother,
mummy. She was bowed to. She talked about titles and rank and...
the only conclusion that made any sense was that she was married
to this Terrius, that she was some kind of royalty, that she...was
the mother of Mamoru, Terry, and Yusuke in their past lives. That
she was the former queen of earth.
As that revelation pierced through her head, May found herself again
worrying about Terry and Yusuke. But this worrying was different from
the previous worrying she had done. She wondered if they were okay,
how they were taking things, if they had had the same dream and how
they would react to it. Having an overwhelming need to check on them
both, May shot out of bed, grabbed her robe and ran to her bedroom door.
She wretched it open and quickly stepped into the hall, where she froze.
Further down the wing, Terry and Yusuke were also in the hall outside
of their rooms. They had obviously been sleeping previously, but they
seemed wide awake at the moment. May stared and them and they stared
back. The hall was silent for a few minutes.
Terry broke the silence with a simple question. "Mother?"
"You had that dream too?" Yusuke asked quietly.
"Oh God," May said in quiet prayer as she grabbed the cross that she
had not removed since she first put it on before coming to this dimension.
For the last six days the cross had been her lifeline as a translation
device, but now she clung to it because of what the symbol meant to her
in her last lifetime. She took a deep breath and looked at the confused
and wary young men in front of her. "We need to talk."
*****
About ten minutes later, Yusuke, Terry and May were sitting around
a table in the kitchen. They each had a cup and saucer in front of
them. Tea bags and instant coffees were arranged in front of them
and a kettle was on the stove. There was also a pound cake and
plates on the table, but no one appeared to be hungry. They were
all still in shock.
Yusuke broke the silence. "What was that dream we had?"
"I don't think it was a dream so much as it was a memory. A memory
of our past lives." May
answered.
"So that older man in dream, he was-"
"Your father, yes." May said.
"Who is he now? I mean, you are our mother, so our father is somewhere
in your life, right?" Terry asked.
May shook her head. "No. At least not to my knowledge. I - let's just
say I was single before I took this mission. I always was single, and I
always will be."
"That's a little cryptic." Yusuke observed. May didn't answer.
"But our father was probably reborn too, right?" Terry asked.
May nodded. "At least, I think he was," she amended.
"And, since Maxine is in my dimension, Daniella is in this dimenion
with our brother, and I assume Lady Keiko is in Yusuke's dimension-" Terry
looked over at Yusuke for confirmation. Yusuke nodded. "Then," Terry
continued "I would assume that our father was somewhere in your dimension."
May thougt about Terry's logical proof. If it was taken as a given that the
former king of earth was reborn and that there was some pattern to their distribution...
May mused the rest of her thoughts aloud, "It makes sense. But I never
met him." After a moment of silence, she reflected, "You know, we all haven't changed
too drastically. Terrius was very much a royal; more than likely he
was reborn as one."
"Are you attracted to any members of royality in your dimension?"
May laughed quietly as she got a far off look in her eyes. "There was one.
Heir to the heir of the British throne. Tall, blond...not really my type
but something just pulled me to him. Well, in the sense that I was attracted
to him. I never met him. I didn't move in those circles." May blinked
several times and then looked down at the table.
After more silence, Terry said, "Daniella, I mean Reika, recognized you,
didn't she? She knew who you where."
"She must have recognized me at some point. Maybe by something I said." May shrugged.
Silence fell again. The three people around the table looked down at their empty
tea cups again. There was so much to say, but it was really hard to say anything.
With this one piece of new information about their past, their present was turned
on its head.
May raised her head to say something, when the tea kettle started to whisle. Rising
to get the hot water, May took a few calming breaths. 'At some point, one of us has
got to ask about what we do with what we know now,' she thought to herself as she poured
the hot water. After sitting again, May looked around the table at the boys who were
once her sons. It was near impossible to tell what they were thinking...but the fact
that Yusuke was so quiet worried her.
"Yusuke, are you okay?" May asked quietly.
"What do you think, lady?! I mean, Mom. I mean...what the hell am I supposed to call
you?!" Yusuke burst out.
May looked at the boy who was once her youngest child. Although he was exploding over
what to call her, it was obvious that his concern was deeper. What he really wanted to
know now was how to treat her. In many ways, up to this point she had been like a peer,
or a "crazy lady" who was the one who had the map, so you followed because you had to.
Suddenly, with one memory, she had become someone who should be afforded a lot of
respect. How does one reconcile that? May couldn't help to have pity on the boy. "You
could call me May," she offered. May looked at Terry and Yusuke both. "In a past life
I was your mother. I am not your mother now. That was another life. We are different
people. Sure, we are still tied together. And yes, we should take this chance to
spend time together...but you don't have to show me any additional deferrence. Besides,"
May laughed, "if the two of you started to be overly respectful, I'd probably have a
heart attack from the shock!"
Terry smiled and chuckled slightly. Yusuke grumbled a little under his breath, but he
seemed a little more at ease.
"So, what do we do now?" Terry asked.
"Well, to be honest, I don't know," May replied. "We still have a week. Honestly, there
really is no point in me sending you back early. We could get to know each other in
this incarnation. We could try to piece together the past. We could..." May trailed
off as she thought.
"Why don't we go check out your world?" Yusuke said, sounding a little disgruntled.
"Huh?" May asked.
"I mean, you got to see our lives, right? You moved around in our dimensions. So,
we should get to move around in yours."
"Yusuke has a point," Terry said. "In watching our lives you really got to know
us. We should get a similar chance to get to know you. You could almost give us a
guided tour of your world. What it's like, what you do-"
"Yeah. It only seems fair," Yusuke pushed the point.
"No." May said.
Both boys blinked and fell silent at her definite refusal.
"Do you not want us in your life? Are you trying to distance yourself from us?" Terry
asked after a few minutes of silence.
"No, of course not! Terry, you and Yusuke both, mean a lot to me...to the point
where it sometimes surprises me. But my answer is still no. I can't."
"Can't or won't?" Yusuke demanded.
"Can't, damnit! I can't do what you ask because I'm-"
At that moment the doorbell rang, cutting off what May was about to say. The unexpected
noise startled them into silence. Then the doorbell rang again.
May sighed as she rose. "I guess I better get that," she said as she began to walk to
the front of the house. She didn't get too far before she realized that Yusuke and Terry
were flanking her. "Okay, why are y'all coming with me?"
"It's 4am, lady. Normal people do not show up at other people's houses at 4am. We
have to protect you." Yusuke replied.
May was about to protest, but then she decided to let it go. In their own way, they
were trying to act like appreciative sons; she needed to let them do this.
Finally, they reached the door. May unlocked the door and looked out into the early morning
to see who their visitor was. "Reika? What are you doing here at this hour?"
The young woman looked up at May with wounded and haunted eyes. "I don't have anywhere else
to go. Every time I turn around their is some memory of my broken engagement or of the
wedding that never happened in my past life or...I just can't take it anymore. I just
needed to talk to someone who would understand."
"Please, come in," May said as she motioned Reika into the house. "We were just about to have
some tea." May continued as Terry took Reika's coat and purse.
"Tea? This early in the morning?"
"Rough night," was Yusuke's explanation.
As Reika stood there, she noticed the slight difference in which Terry and Yusuke were
treating May. At moments there seemed to be confusion or hestitation. And they did
seem to be a little more respectful. Reika could only think of one reason why there
would be a change in everyone's behavior. "So, you remember who May was now, I take
it?" she asked.
"Yes," Terry said as he returned from putting away Reika's belongings.
"It was a little bit of a shock for all of us," May shared as the four began to walk
back to the kitchen. "We still really aren't sure how to handle our new found information."
As they re-entered the kitchen, Reika sat at the fourth seat as May pulled out a fourth
cup and saucer.
"Reika, maybe you can help us," Terry began. "We've asked May to let us get to know
her a little better, take us to her home, etc. She's refused. Maybe you can-" what
Terry was going to was lost as May slammed the cup down with a crash onto the counter.
Everyone in the room turned to look at her, but May kept her back to the table for
awhile. Finally, she said, "I never did tell you how I ended up with the task
of bringing together the royal family, did I?" She turned around and sat the cup
and saucer in front of Reika. Then she walked around to her chair and sank into it.
After a few more minutes of silence, she began to speak again. "I was a graduate student
in arts and sciences at a prestious public university. It was an April day, and I was
sick of my masters' thesis, this huge project that seemed to be sucking the life out of
me." She laughed briefly, but there was no joy in the sound. "That day, I decided
that I needed a walk, so I left campus and went wandering through the nearby neighborhood.
That was when I stumbled on the house fire.
"The scene was pure chaos. At first, I was just watching in a sick fasination, you know,
the same fasination that has us stopping to look at car wrecks. Then, I heard it. A
mother begging someone to save her baby, her child still trapped in the burning building.
"I wish I could say that would have been enough for me to act, but to be honest, it
wouldn't have been. People die in fires everyday. It is sad, but it not enough to get
me to do something crazy. But, you see, I recognized the name of the child still
trapped. I tutored her on occassion. She was such a sweet little girl, full of life
and energy...and I couldn't imagine a world without her. At least I didn't want to.
"So I ran into the burning building." By this point May's eyes were closed and she
had begun to shake, but she continued, "The smoke was so thick that I could really
see, much less breathe. The only thing I could do was listen for cries and try
to follow them, hoping that I found Melissa. I still don't really know how I found
her, just suddenly there she was. I picked her up and began to fight my way back
to the door, to get her out.
"The heat was intense. I fell several points on the way back. It was a struggle to
get up each time. I was sweating, so much so that I really couldn't see, even if there
was no smoke. But somehow I made it to the door. I...I think I handed Melissa to someone,
I really don't remember how she got over the threshold...but then, as I was about to
step out, I heard a cracking noise. I looked up, and then...
"And then I woke up. Well, okay, woke up is the wrong word. I was in a white room,
but not a hospital...and I was talking to an angel who told me I was dead. Then,
she gave me the chance to do this, to bring a family together." May laughed mirthlessly
again. "So, you see, I can't go back. I've been dead for three weeks." With that,
May finally looked up to look at the people sitting around the table.
Reika looked confused and even a little frightened. 'That's right, Reika doesn't
even know about my mission or my powers. It has got to be unnerving to hear
someone talking about their mission and dying when you thought they were just a
tourist who happened to be queen in their past life.'
Terry and Yusuke however, looked shell-shocked and wounded. They had both seen
enough craziness in their lives not to be scared, but what they were going through
had to be even more painful. She had presented them with a parent from this
last life, and then taken that parent away. 'Talk about a sudden death,' May
thought.
Finally, they began to speak. Terry started in denial, "No. I don't believe you.
You aren't dead. You can't be."
Yusuke, not surprisingly considering how he uses anger and scarcasm to cope, jumped
right to the anger stage. "Why the hell didn't you tell us this before?!"
"Because I didn't think it was important."
"NOT IMPORTANT?! You were our MOTHER, damnit!"
"Which I didn't know when I started this!" May burst out. "Do you really think this
is easy for me?! I'm dead. And I'm reminded that I'm dead in subtle ways everyday.
I died before I could marry. Hell, I hadn't even really dated. I died before I
could do so much. And then I meet you two...and then I realize that I'm your mother.
Then you ask me if you could spend time with me in my home and - and-" May put her
head in her hands and began to cry.
Yusuke was about to open his mouth to shout something else, but Reika shook her
head. She reached out to touch May's hand. May looked up, surprised. "I won't
pretend that I understand all of this," Reika said, "but it is clear that you need
a friend or three right now. A long time ago, you were there for me at my lowest."
She smiled. "I guess it is my turn."
"Thank you." May managed to get out.
Again the group fell into silence. And they sat there for a while in silence. Then
the conversations slowly began again. Conversations about the past, about the dream,
about the present, although they could not bring themselves to discuss the future. And,
long after their untouched water had gone cold, long after the sun had risen, the four
still sat around the table, talking, pausing...and by about midday they seemed to be
able to laugh again, at least briefly.
- to be continued -
Whew! That was a very hard chapter to write. Trying to figure out what the
real reactions everyone would have to the news was difficult. It took me
over two weeks to write the second half of this chapter alone.
As for the dream, I know it doesn't make a lot of sense here...but it would
make more sense if you have read some of "Royal Blue" which is the prequel
to this story. I promise that I'll get back to "Royal Blue" soon...well as
soon as my writer's block goes away.
Final note, if you have read chapter 13, you may want to go back and re-read it.
After talking to my editor, I've decided to cut a scene from that chapter, because
it was a little too pat and too unbelieveable. Writing believeable chapters is
getting harder and harder. Well, at least the story is almost over. There are
only four chapters after this one, and one is completely finished (two of the
remaining three have been started).
Happy reading and please read and review. The next chapter will be even harder
to write and I need all of the suggestions I can get.