Ah, all my loyal reviewers. You are admirable, brilliant, cool, daring, exquisite, fervent, great, hilarious, intrepid, just, kind, luxurious, magnificent, nutty, outstanding, persuasive, quaint, renowned, symmetrical, thoughtful, understanding, volunteering, wonderful, xylophone, yielding, and zealous! THANKS!
ASOUEFAN- Thanks a lot! Don't worry, I will write more stories… I hope. I just need an idea. Help is welcome!
Evil Grinlord- Yes, the truth is so utterly upsetting. I feel bad for you about dying because of your report card. I have never died for that reason, but I got pretty close with one of my teachers for something else.
Alania- Yes, I have asked someone, E, if updating is 'in' and she said yes. So look! I have updated. I hope I can go to your house again soon. Live Long and Prosper! (Is that right?)
A/N: Last chappie! (Sob!) The end of my first fanfic… But I will write again!
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters from ASOUE. They belong to Lemony Snicket and Daniel Handler. I've said this for 13 chapters! You think they'd let me stop already!
THE DAILY PUNCTILIO
"All the news in fits of print"
Unknown Woman Murdered
This Monday, authorities discovered the mangled clothing of an unidentifiable woman floating in the waters ofLake Lachrymose. No one has been able to verify who she was, or why her plum-colored dress was in the lake, but police received an anonymous phone call yesterday saying she was murdered, and then pushed into the water by a mysterious figure with an eye tattoo on his ankle. An event similar to this has been reported in the past, in which a rich widow was pushed off a cliff, also by a man with a tattoo on his ankle. The anonymous caller also mentioned the name Snicket, which detectives are investigating now.
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Lemony read the morning paper as he poured himself a cup of hot tea. The Daily Punctilio had never been a reliable newspaper, and judging by that story, it still wasn't.
But I was just about the cause of her death. Even a week after the incident, Lemony still had nightmares and thought about it constantly. He knew it would scar him forever, just as when Beatrice had died. This was perhaps even worse, because Lemony knew he was partly responsible for Ignacia's death. Lemony sipped his tea and thought about all the people that had died in the V.F.D. struggle. The good; and the evil.
Lemony set his mug unto the table and slowly made his way into his room. He gathered a few papers scattered about the floor and set them on his desk in a neat pile, next to his old beaten typewriter. Lemony dragged a small wooden chair from the corner over to his desk, and carefully sat down.
He looked thoughtfully at his framed photo of Beatrice, and then at his commonplace notebook. He flexed his fingers and placed them on his typewriter. Then Lemony Snicket began to type.
A/N: Very short, and yet I had to add it in. So how did everyone like the story? Yes, I know it was gloomy, but that's Lemony Snicket for you! Moooochas gracias to all my reviewers (Do you get it PearlGirl? Ha ha!), you people deserve a gold medal. Or some piece of round metal that vaguely resembles gold, but it's cheaper. We're on a small budget, okay? Well, I will write another story, but when, I have no idea. I need a good plot first. Any opinions are welcome! Reviewing is still yummy! I LOVE REVIEWS!
And now, it is the official end of my first fanfic. (Runs off crying hysterically)
With All Due Respect,
visualpurple