Chapter 10

Abby sat in the open field thinking about her choice. Tom had told her she had a little time to think about it, but how long exactly, she didn't know. Life or death? Go back to her friends where there was a good chance she would no longer have the abilities she used to, or death, where she would no longer feel any pain, ever again.

"Are you doing okay?" Tom walked over to her.

"Sure, why not? I mean it's not like this is a life and death decision," she laughed; it was only a life or death decision.

"Point taken, have you made a choice?" he knelt down beside her as Abby shook her head.

"You can't help me at all, I'm guessing?"

"Sorry Abby, this is all you." she looked over at him

"Thanks Tom, I really appreciate it," he smiled at her. "Is there any way we could go back?"

"To the hospital? Sure, I don't see why not, but Abby I want you to know that your decision must be made soon, or your friends will make it for you," Abby was confused, but decided not to pursue it at the moment. She just wanted to see her friends again, even if they couldn't see her. Once again, Tom grabbed her arm and soon their surroundings began to change.

Jake walked into Abby's room, seeing her for the first time that day. He couldn't stand to look at her, she seemed so helpless. She was helpless; after all, she couldn't even breathe for herself anymore. As he looked down at her, Jake realized that he didn't even know the full extent of her injures. Taking a deep breath, he reached for her chart and began flipping though the pages. Most of it, Kerry had already told him about, what she didn't tell him was that Abby's condition was slowly deteriorating, she was getting worse. The pressure inside her brain was growing, even after surgery; her organs were beginning to shut down. It said in the chart that nephrologists would be down later that day, to decide if dialysis should be started in order to preserve her kidneys. Since the accident she had suffered at least four seizures, each one doing more and more damage to her already critical condition.

"Abby, I'm here for you. Dr. Weaver called up and said she'd be here soon to come and visit." Jake paused for a minute, trying to gather his words. "Morris was the one who hit you Abby, they arrested him that night. The police wont tell us where they're holding him, they knew that most, if not all, of us would try and kill him." he was desperately trying to hold back the tears. "He was high, as usual, but Susan is blaming herself. She says she knew that Morris was getting high, but didn't have the time to deal with him, so she just gave him "easy cases" Carter literally had to sit her down in the lounge and tell her that it wasn't her fault."

Jake was holding onto her hand, "please baby you need to open those beautiful eyes for us." A tear rolled down his cheek gently landing against her hand, "come back to us Abby I know you can." He brought her hand up to place a gentle kiss upon it. He didn't know that Abby was actually hearing everything that he was telling her, that she was actually standing next to him. Tears began rolling down her face as she watched Jake cry over her. She was startled when the door opened, and Carter, Susan and Kerry walked in.

"Jake," Kerry's voice was gentle, the news she was about to deliver wasn't happy, and he sensed it.

"Yes?" he answered without turning around.

"We need to talk outside," Abby didn't miss the sympathetic glance Tom shot her way, you decide or your friends decide, the statement was beginning to make sense.

"I'm not leaving her right now; I haven't been able to be with her for over twenty four hours. Whatever needs to be said can be said in here."

"Jake, please, for Abby, we need to talk about this outside, you can have the rest of the day off to be with her" Susan spoke for the first time since they had entered the room. Jake nodded, the only reason he was going, was for Abby.

Kerry as gently as she could, but with a firmness that she knew she needed to have right now, led Jake outside the room. She knew he was reluctant to leave Abby but if she could hear, no, they knew she could hear this wasn't something that she wanted Abby to hear. "I know that you care for Abby." Kerry started in, "but I want you to prepare yourself for the worst case scenario here." She said trying to be strong yet sympathetic. "There's been no change in her EEG and the neurologist is going to do one more and then an apnea test." She said softly knowing that the young med student would know what this was all leading too.

Jake was silent, taking in what Kerry had just said to him, it was hard to accept either way, but as a soon to be doctor he knew what she was saying and it needed to be done. If Abby was going to come back to them she would. Jake didn't want to think about the alternative.

He finally nodded from behind his now wet with tears eyes. "I understand Kerry." There was no emotion in his voice; it was as flat as he was feeling right now. Sure that they would want to have it done before Maggie got there, giving them more time to talk with the family about what they wanted done in regards to her care.