Chapter 13
AN: I really…REALLY enjoyed all the reviews you guys have sent me in the last chapter. All of them were funny. Someone evenswats my head. ;) I know…I've been a bad girl for having that really crappy cliffhanger. Well…I'll stop this nonsense and just continue. Hope you guys enjoy it!!
Buffy's POV
"Faith…I want you to…I want you to…love me…"
She frowned slightly and I just continued talking…making her understand what I'm feeling…
"I want you to love me Faith. Not just like a sister…or a friend. What I want is far more than that. I want you to love me…as me. Buffy. I want to have your heart…so you can have mine. I want you to love me…because I already love… you…"
We suddenly stopped swaying and just looked at each other, waiting for her to say something…anything. She was surprised when I told her that, seeing her eyes went wide. Now…I can see so many emotions in her eyes. I noticed two of them. Fear and uncertainty.
She opened her lips a little and looked away. Is that a way for her to say that she doesn't feel the same way? I frowned slightly feeling rejected…and it hurt a lot. I looked down and released my hand that's wrapping her neck. I smiled through the pain.
"I-It's…alright if you…can't or won't do it…I'm n-not going to f-force you…"
I wanted to go away from her…I want to cry out loud until I don't have anymore tears left. It hurts so bad…I just wanted to die right there and then.
I was about to run off when I felt her hand on my wrist stopping me from doing so. I slowly turn to her and saw her frowning slightly, looking straight at me.
"Buffy…that's not…what I meant…"
I suddenly felt this bright light of hope thinking that maybe…just maybe she feels the same way. We stared at each other again with her hand still holding my wrist, squeezing it. She looked away again looking nervous…and shy.
"B-Buffy…I…I…th-think….I…."
She really is nervous what with her hand squeezing my wrist tight. I didn't complain though. I waited for her to finish what she's going to say. Even if it takes forever…
The forever was suddenly gone when Angel approached us.
"Buffy. There you are. You promised me a dance remember?"
I looked at him then at Faith. I wanted to tell Angel no…that I want to stay here with Faith and let her finish what she's about to say. I was really about to do that when I felt Angel pull my other hand pulling me away from Faith. I was about to pull my hand and go to Faith again when I felt her hand release me. I looked at her as Angel continue me to pull away from her…
Even as I walk away…I still kept my gaze to hers. I didn't even blink. The only time I looked away was when she walked away, heading outside…
Faith's POV
I couldn't say it…
Couldn't say to her that it's exactly how I feel…
That I want her beside me always…
That it tears me apart to see her with Angel…
But I couldn't…
I was scared…
Scared that once I tell her…someday…she might fall out of love for me…
I don't want that…
I want her forever…
I sighed as I looked up at the dark sky. I'm outside the party walking towards the garden. I saw a bench and decided to sit there thinking of what to do. I know how I feel…but I'm not sure if I should say it. Like I said…I'm scared.
"Angel? Oh…It's you…"
I looked up to see Cordelia frowning. I looked away from her tired and still unsure on what to do. I heard her footsteps and thought she's going to leave me alone, but it was the opposite. She sat down beside me. I didn't look at her. I just continue to stare on the ground thinking that it might help me figure out something. Kinda stupid huh?
I heard her sigh.
"That Angel…I was only in the bathroom for minute and suddenly…he's gone. I wonder where he is."
I ignored her hoping that she might go away and bother someone else. I wanted to be alone. But knowing her…even if I told her she just wouldn't listen. So I just figure the silent treatment might help me get rid of her. It didn't though…it just made her talk and talk more. And much worse…it's about Angel…
"He's so good looking don't you think? He's even built…unlike Spike who's thin like a stick. I wonder if he has a girlfriend. I would get jealous if he has. Probably some bimbo blonde. No matter. I'll just steal him away from the bimbo…"
I turn to her and frowned…
"If you like him so much, why don't you just ask him to marry you?! That way he'll have you as a bimbo!"
I thought saying that might get her piss off. Instead she looked at me smiling.
"And have Buffy as your girlfriend…right?"
I raised my eyebrow at her and looked away, still frowning.
"Faith…you know what you want…but still you reject it. What happened to you? You've changed. The Faith I used to know is fearless."
I turned to her again.
"Are you done now? Would you just leave me alone?"
"Is that how you want to be? Alone? While you're sitting here for I don't know why…your girlfriend is dancing with a hot guy. Don't you want to do something about it?"
"She's not my girlfriend!"
"But that's what you want her to be…I can tell. Fuck, I think everyone can tell. We can tell…but you can't…"
Somehow…all the things she's telling me…in some way…is right. I do know what I want…who I want. I was so blind not knowing that the only person I want…is right there beside me. I'm such a fuck up loser…
I sighed looking at the ground again.
"Why are you saying this?"
She let out a sigh looking at me.
"I'm saying this because I want to rule the world…….DUH! I want to help you, you dumb ass! You might not know this but…shit I can't believe I'm gonna say this…I…I…like you Faith. You're like a dumb little sister I wished I had…"
I couldn't help but grin at her. She thinks of me as her little sister…though I wouldn't agree about the whole dumb thingy…
"Thanks Cor…I like you too. You're like a slut, loudmouth, bimbo sister I wished I had…"
She rolled her eyes and got up looking down at me.
"Wow…I'm flattered. But don't go all soft on me now that you know I like you."
I grinned at her and nodded. She walked ahead and turns to face me again.
"You better get the girl! Or else I'll the rest of the gang that the mighty Faith…one of the three kings is afraid of a blonde girl."
"You're forgetting something Cor…"
She frowned not understanding what I was saying. I grinned at her thankful for all the things she said.
"…I'm not afraid of anything…"
She grinned back at me and turns to walk away. I stared at her for awhile thinking of the advice that SHE said to me. The world must be coming to an end for Cordelia to be giving me advice…
'Then…if the end of the world IS near…then I want to spend the rest of the time with her… If she still want me that is…'
Buffy's POV
I danced with Angel and some other people too. I looked around while I was dancing hoping to see Faith. I saw Spike…talking to some girls, Willow and Tara talking to the bride and groom, Angel dancing with another girl and Cordelia who just entered the room again smiling at me. I found it weird…but I smiled back.
It's nearly midnight and still I haven't seen her. Most of the guests were leaving. Even Willow, Tara, Spike and Cordelia already left. I asked them if they saw Faith. Cordelia was the one who replied saying…
"She's still inside. Don't worry…she won't run."
I couldn't help but frown at what she said. I was confused and she gave me a grin and a wink making me more confused. Angel said that he'll take me home but…I told him that I'll wait for Faith. He's being a little persistent when he told me that he'll take us both home.
We waited outside the front door hoping that Faith would come out sooner. She did and was surprised when she saw us…especially me. I stared at her and she stared back. I noticed that she changed her clothes and well…I was disappointed. I mean…she looked so…gorgeous in that gown that I wouldn't mind if she wears it forever. But now that I think about it…she always did look gorgeous.
We continue to stare at each other. She frowned slightly saying…
"I…I thought you're gone…"
Faith's POV
I decided to change my clothes getting irritated because well…it's itchy. When I was done I talked to Xander and Anya for awhile congratulating them and saying goodbye as they're heading towards their honeymoon in Hawaii. Kinda nice huh?
Anyway…after saying goodbye I decided to head home knowing that everyone is gone. Even…her. When I opened the front door…I was surprised to see her standing with still her gown on. I stopped walking and just stared at her…hoping that it's not an illusion. I frowned slightly…
"I…I thought you're gone…"
She smiled slightly looking so…beautiful.
"I…was…I'm waiting for you…"
There seemed to be some hidden message there. I noticed. But I'm not going to back out…even though I really want to run away. I'm not going to though, and I hope she doesn't either…
We just kept on staring at each other…but I looked away when I heard Angel's voice.
"Faith, come on. I'm going to give you two a ride home."
I frowned slightly and began to walk forward looking at Angel. I shook my head and smiled a little.
"No thanks…I'm gonna take a walk…"
I glanced at Buffy and noticed that she's looking at the ground…looking disappointed and hurt. I guess she thinks that I'm avoiding her. I'm not though. I tried to fix things by smiling at her saying…
"Do you want to join me?"
Slowly, she looked up to my eyes. Seeing me smile and offering her to join me, her disappointed and hurt look was replaced by a bright smile which made me breathless.
'God…she looks so…so…damn…beautiful…but that word doesn't seem to cut it…'
I didn't know I had my lips open slightly. Only when she took my chin and closed did I notice. Still with her hand on my chin…she whispered so softly…
"Yes…I'd love to…"
Buffy's POV
"Yes…I'd love to…"
I said to her which gave her a wide smile which I rarely see. She nodded and I pulled my hand away from her. I turn to look at Angel who is…well…smiling at us. I found it weird but…I smiled back.
"I'm sorry Angel…but I decided to walk with Faith."
He shook his head, smiling…
"It's okay. Just be careful okay? I'll see you later…"
I nodded and watch him get on his car and drive away. I turn to look at Faith again who looked at me smiling slightly…
"Shall…we go now?"
I nodded and begin to walk with her beside me.
Faith's POV
'Shit…what the hell am I suppose to say? I wish Cordelia advised me on this thing…'
I frowned looking at the ground as we continue to walk in silence. This silence…is making me awkward and well…nervous. I silently thank her when she finally spoke.
"So…you changed your clothes…"
I shrugged looking ahead as we walked.
"Uh…yeah. That gown's not the most comfortable thing for a person like me to wear…"
"But…even if it's not that comfortable for you…you still looked…so…beautiful…"
It's the first time…someone called me that. Though I've been called sexy, hot and luscious…but beautiful? Nah…
I stopped walking and turned to her, smiling.
"Hey…I thought I said you're the beautiful one B…"
I was intending to make her blush by saying that to her. I was surprised though when she did and placed her hand on my cheek caressing it…saying…
"Apparently…I'm not the only one…"
Again we stared at each other. I was stuck by her words…and her sincerity. I wanted to kiss her right there and then. And by looking at her…I'm not the only one wanting to do it.
I felt water on my forehead. I looked up and well…it's starting to rain. I quickly grabbed her hand and ran to look for shelter.
Buffy's POV
We ran and ran as the rain continues to pour down. I liked it. The rain pouring down on me for the first time…it felt great. Not only the rain felt great…but also Faith's hand on mine.
Finally she found a place where we could stop. It was in a large tree. She leaned at the trunk breathing heavily and I did the same…still holding her hand. After calming down a bit…I glanced at her and saw her with her eyes closed. I looked at her for awhile…admiring her.
From the day she was born…I was there. Even now, that she's grown up. I've watched her for so many days…hours. I never…ever imagined that I might actually meet her…what with me being a guardian angel and all. But now that I have…I really have no intention of leaving her. I'd…die without her.
I sighed and looked up. Finally after a couple of minutes of silence, I finally voiced out what I wanted to say.
"You…didn't say anything about what I said back there…when we were dancing…"
It came out so soft that I thought she didn't hear it. She did though. She turned to me and I turned to her also. Her eyes again were full of emotion, but the things that I saw earlier weren't there anymore. I guess she's determined to say something now.
"You mean…the… 'You want me to love you' part?"
She smiled at me slightly that made me blush. But I didn't break the eye contact. I'm afraid that if I did…she might avoid the question again. I was surprised though when she was the one who break the eye contact, looking ahead.
"I think it's stupid…"
I felt tears in my eyes as I heard her say that. I looked at the ground trying to control my tears…but I couldn't. I was now crying. Tears just won't stop flowing in my face…
She turned to me and placed her hand to my cheek making me look at her. I couldn't seem to read what she's feeling or thinking. When she spoke…it was so soft and without any negative emotion in them…
"It's stupid… because I don't really think of you as a friend or a sister. That was just a cover up. I wanted to be more than that. I want to do everything with you. I want you. What you're asking me isn't hard…it's so damn easy. Easy, because…I'm already in love with you…"
She's wiping my tears and caressing my cheek, smiling. I smiled back despite the tears and placed my hand on top of hers.
"I love you…because you're Buffy…my Buffy…"
I closed my eyes as she slowly move her lips towards mine. Again we kissed…but this time we didn't hold back any more. I kissed her with all the love I felt inside…and she did the same. I feel so happy and warm even though I'm soaked.
I love her…and she loves me…
But still… even if she does love me as Buffy…would she still love me if I tell her I'm an angel? Her angel?
AN: And that's the million dollar question…
This fic is just too sappy for my taste…I just hope you like it…