The pile of Lois Vuitton luggage was stacked next to Ava like a mini pyramid, and she tipped the driver $50 and gave him an autograph for his daughter. She straightened her leather jacket and rang the door bell. Sandra answered quickly, her features quickly registering her surprise.

"Oh! Ava! What are you doing here? I thought you where home. The women on the television keeps using the word crisis a lot."

"I need...it's just....we think." Ava stopped and then said "Mom, I think my marriage is in trouble."

It took a hell of a lot of Ava to admit that to herself, let alone anyone else, but how long have we know? We, the impartial outsiders? We could see it right from the start couldn't we? Well, at least she knew now. Sandra called for William (who Ava shot a look of disgust) and asked him to take Ava's things upstairs while she made her a cup of tea. She gave it to her in a old pink mug that Ava remembered buying for a mother's day eleven years ago.

"Why?" Sandra asked. "You and Josh seem perfect for each other."

"But the point is, I don't think we are."

Sandra got up and ushered out the room before returning seconds later with a thick book, she flipped it open and showed Ava.

"This is every single clipping from every single thing you've ever done."

And it was, from her very first publicity shot, to the same interview regurgitated in seven different magazines, to a picture from every angle at the Oscars down to the John scandal. Sandra was more interested in showing her pictures of her with Josh.

"Look Ava, look at this. The two of you are a wonderful couple and you have a life other people only dream about. You got out of here and made something of yourself. You have everything you ever wanted."

But she didn't. As she sat there, drinking tea, Ava though about it, she thought about what she had wanted and what she had now. She hadn't wanted controlling agents who planned her whole life, she hadn't wanted a husband who was a lap dog. She hadn't wanted to be a bitch and forget where she had come from. But it had happened , look at her now.

"Ava, your father would be so proud of you. You won an Oscar! Who could ever believe that little Ava Rose would ever win an Oscar?"

Ava couldn't help but smile, for some reason that little gold statue brought her so much joy. But as she thought about it, proudly standing on the mantelpiece at home, and how early reports where already suggesting she was nominated for 'Best Supporting Actress', something Justine said came into her head.

"If I was you I wouldn't be so proud of that. All it means is that you're good at pretending to be something you're not."

"Mom, Josh wants me to have a baby."

Sandra's weary features lit up. "Really? That's fantastic! Another Grandchild!"

"No, Mom, I'm not going to get pregnant."

Wow, she had decided without anyone else help. The surprises keep coming.

"Why not?"

"I don't want a baby with Josh..." she paused before adding. "...now, not like this."

Stopping after saying 'Josh' would have been better, but saying that meant having to question all sorts of other things about herself and her life. Remember when I said the first time you lose faith in something is terrifying? Well when it happens the second time it's worse somehow, Ava knew that, she didn't want to feel like that yet.

"I have to go see John."

"Ava no. You can't! The press!"

But Ava was already gone.

When John opened the door, Ava was there and it was just Ava. There where no designer labels, no smoky eyes and shiny jewellery, just her. Granted the white vest top she was wearing was probably D&G and her jeans where probably Calvin Kline, but she looked like just Ava.

"Hey." she greeted with a smile.

"I thought you and Josh where having...."

"Crisis talks? Wasn't just us, it was the agents as well and they where....I had to get away from them."

"Why not go to Italy? You have a house there."

"I know, it's my house, look, can I come in?"

John stepped aside and Ava walked in, but went no futhur then the hall.

"I shouldn't of told the press I didn't know you." She said in a small voice. "But you saw the way they twisted everything and they could tear my life apart. I had to do it, I had to save everything."

He nodded as though he understood, but didn't really. "It's fine."

"No it's not. My agent wanted me to stop talking to you, he took away my laptop."

"Ava, why are you here?"

"I told you...."

"No." John said. "Here, as in, my house. To tell me you're sorry?"

"Yes...no. John, look..."

Even before she could say anything, John could sense what was coming. It was like he'd heard it all before or something.

"Ava don't. Me and you where high school flings. Flings do not happen again years later, especially between me and you. I'm a wrestler and you're...."

"Married?" Ava guessed.

"A star."

Her insides deflated, but you would never know it. With a flick of her hair, she flashed a small and pulled her persona back on as though it was a jumper.

"I wasn't even going to say anything like that." she told him. "I was just going to say, let's be friends."

John's insides deflated, but you would never know it. Instead he said.

"We can't. You're a start."