Disclaimer: Once again I don't own any turtles, rats, shredder, foot clan, reporters or casey. All I own is this story, Brianna, and all other characters in it. 

Chapter 14 – Why?

"So you guys saved the day once again, huh?" April asked after hearing about what had happened. The turtles and Brianna returned two nights after they were captured. The turtles were in a good mood, excitedly chatting about how the building exploded, especially Raph. Donnie told April and Splinter the more technical part of the adventure. Mikey agreed with Raph on how cool the building looked when it was going down. Brianna hadn't said a word. She just plopped herself on the far side of the couch, staring at nothing.

"I am proud of all of you tonight," Splinter said, "Leo; you showed compassion when you found a way to save some of those people –"Raph rolled his eyes upon hearing this. Yea, we should've let them all burn! But instead, oh fearless leader just had to go save their loser behinds!

"Why do you think that, Raphael?" Splinter asked.

"Who's to say, they won't try to capture us again? The ones in charge are gone but that doesn't mean someone from one of the lower ranks won't get some bright idea about us," He answered.

"There is no way to know if any of them would have the kind of thoughts that you suggest. But it is not right to mass murder a group of people simply because one fears retaliation. Life is very precious. It is not for us to decide who dies and who lives.

I hope that you will remember this, Raphael. However I am proud of your quick thinking tonight. It was that quick thinking that lead to yours, your brothers', and Miss Brianna's escape,"

"You say you're proud of us, including me! Yet you don't condone murder!" Brianna asked as she looked over from her position on the couch. There was dead silence for but a moment as everyone turned to look at her since it was the first thing she'd said upon returning.

"Yes I am proud of you. I am proud of the fact that you helped my sons to escape. I am also grateful to you because of that. I do believe that life is scared and that we should not play God with other people's lives. But sometimes it is necessary that a few men die in order to save many men," Splinter said.

"Master Splinter's right. We wouldn't have gotten out of there without your help. That Capt. Carter and Lt. Nitwite never would've let us go and even if we had managed to escape, there's no doubt in my mind that they would've stopped at nothing to get us back. You only did what you had to do," Leo assured her.

"Only did what I had to do? I killed tonight! And I would've kept on killing if you hadn't stopped me," She countered.

"True but you killed an evil man," Leo responded.

"Yea, it's not like you killed the pope or something," Mikey added, trying to put a smile on her face. This worked for a fraction of a second.

"And technically you didn't kill Nitwite. You just knocked him out. The explosion killed him," Donnie reminded.

"Yea but I'm still a cold-blooded murderer,"

"Miss Brianna, you are not a cold-blooded murderer. You are greater than that. I sense you have trouble controlling your emotions like my son, Raphael –"Splinter started to say.

"Hey! I can control my –"Whack! Splinter's cane hit the top of Raph's head. He rubbed his head and allowed Splinter to finish what he was saying.

"- So I suggest that you spend some time mediating alone on the roof to clear your head. Only then will you find some peace in your soul," Splinter finished. Brianna nodded and made her way to the roof.

"Do you think she'll find what she's looking for?" Leo asked Splinter.

"I sincerely hope so for all our sakes,"

-Flashback-

"You're nothing. You're merely an object for people like me to use. So stop fooling around and do what you are told!" Capt. Carter yelled at Brianna. Brianna nodded her head without ever looking up at him. It wasn't that she was afraid of him. It was that she loathed him and was afraid of killing him if she looked at him. She longed for the day when she could give the Captain a piece of her mind.

End Flashback-

I did want to kill Carter. I wanted to kill them for treating me like an object all those years, for trying to make me kill the turtles, for making me help kidnap the turtles, for what they did to my mother, and for Dr. Madison. Who wouldn't want to kill them? All my life I've been trained to fight and kill. That was my life. Until I happened to see an episode of 'Charmed'. That's when I realized that there was more to life than just fighting and death. I started to draw the floor plan of the building in my head, knowing that I would need to know my way around if I were ever going to escape. I made quite a few failed escape attempts, never getting past the gate. All of which earned me a harsh punishment. Once I finally do succeed at escaping, I come across four mutant turtles, a mutant rat, a reporter and her boyfriend. Then I am kidnapped by their nemesis and controlled by some implant chip. I attacked the turtles and am then taken back to that place where I helped capture the turtles and once again attack them. At last the implant chip is removed and I am allowed to think and act on my own. Only then do I learn the truth about my parents. Not the bullshit lies Carter told me years ago. Next thing I know there's Carter. All I could think about was all the lies that I had been told and how he had been using me. So I killed him just like I had been taught to do all my life. So why do I regret doing it? He did deserve to die. So did Nitwite. No doubt about it. The world is a better place without them.

Brianna had been sitting on the roof thinking about her life and the recent events for several hours now. She had completely lost track of the time and had no idea that one turtle was especially concerned about her. She had gotten so lost in her own thoughts that she didn't even hear that same turtle come up behind her until he spoke.

"Beautiful night, isn't it?" Brianna jumped and whirled around, her fist up and about to punch whoever it was in the face. Leonardo caught the punch mid-air.

"Oh! Leo! Hi! Sorry about that," She exclaimed when she realized that it had been Leo who'd surprised her and not some would be attacker.

"It's alright. It's my fault. I shouldn't have scared you like that. I just. . . just. . . just wanted to. . . tell you. . . that I. . . umm. . . that I. . . love you," Leo stuttered out.

"Woo wait. You love me?"

"Yes. I thought you deserved to know that you're loved,"

"My mother loved me,"

"Yes I know, but I was thinking you needed to know that someone else who's alive loved you. Does love you,"

"So do you really love me or are you just saying that because you think that's what I need to hear?" She asked.

"No. I mean yes. I mean I really do love you, Brianna. And I was kind of hoping you'd be ready to admit your feelings,"

"I do like you. You're a nice friend, but –"What on earth was that turtle thinking? Insisting that she had feelings for him? Did she have feelings for him?

"Look, just ask yourself this one question. If you don't love me then why were you unable to kill me when you had the chance? You had more than one chance. And each time, you failed to kill me. Why is that?"

"I. . . I . . . I . . . I don't know. Just please go away. I need to think. I can't focus,"

Leonardo sighed and went back inside. Why didn't I kill him? I was being controlled by that mind-control device. I did everything else I was told, except for killing Leonardo. Maybe I do love him? Maybe love was the only thing powerful enough to overcome the mind-control device?

What am I gonna do with my life now? Go live like a normal person in New York City? Go be with Leonardo? Find my real family?