Fairly Odd Parents Goes Anime!
Ch.16- Here's Luke!
Timmy, Cosmo, and Wanda meet a bishoujo trainer named Luke Skyskipper to help them...but little do they know what his relationship is to Mara! (And don't worry...he's a good guy! )
"Well, what are we going to do now? Mara's getting smarter each time." Timmy said sourly as he sat on his bed. "Who knows what she's going to come up with next time. I mean, Cosmo almost fell for Mara!" "Hey! I thought she was Makoto! She does have the same colored hair and eyes!" Cosmo argued, hugging a picture of Makoto tightly to himself. He was also wearing a green t-shirt that said 'I Heart Kino Makoto' with a picture of her on the back. He had a Sailor Jupiter action figure in his hand that he stole from Wanda's collection. "Eh, whatever." Timmy said. "Have you thought about a plan Wanda?" he turned to the pink-haired fairy for an answer, but his eyes grew flat as he saw her sitting on the floor playing with Sailor Moon Japanese version action figures.
"Moon Prism Power...make up!" She said, twirling the Sailor Moon doll around to indicate transforming. She did the same with the other dolls, and then she took Tuxedo Kamen doll (plastic rose included! ) And made him walk around, spouting big speeches about protecting the Sailor scouts with his moon power, and then made him moon the other dolls. "EEK! " She made the other dolls squeak in horror before being thrown across the room. "What a fine ass you have there, Tuxedo Kamen!" Sailor Moon said. "Why thank you, Usagi. Would you like to touch me?" Tuxedo Kamen said. "Of course!" Wanda then made Sailor Moon squeal in excitement and slap his ass.
"AHEM." Wanda looked up to see her godchild tapping his foot and looking at her weirdly. "Eh? You need something, sport?" She asked. "I'm in the middle of a 'Sailor Moon' moment here." "Have you thought of a plan to fight against Mara?" He asked. "Well, since she's a 'bishounen trainer', why not bring in a...what do you call a guy who likes anime girls?" Wanda asked. "Bishoujo trainer?" Cosmo asked. "That's right!" Timmy said. "Wow, and I just guessed after studying this 'Guide to Anime' book I found randomly on the floor." He said, holding up the book before burying his head in it and proceeding to block everything out. "...Hey, did you know that Hentai is only 2% of all the anime produced in Japan? It seems that nobody really is interested in that genre. Wow, I did not know that." (A/N: It's true!)
"Hm...bishoujo trainer...they could help us with our problem...but have they met an otaku such as Mara?" Timmy, Cosmo, and Wanda's eyes grew big, as the wall beside them suddenly expanded before cracking into a big hole. A teenage boy around Timmy's age stood in the midst of the rubble, his foot raised in the manner of a martial art stance. He had red hair cut into a hairstyle like Trunks', playful dark blue eyes, and was holding a pair of tonfa in his hands. "Did somebody say, bishoujo trainer?" He announced. He wore a black shirt and a white long sleeved shirt under it. His blue jeans had a little flame on it, along with his Converse shoes.
"...Um, no not really." Cosmo said. "We really were just mumbling stuff." He poofed the Sailor Jupiter stuff away, as well as the action figures. "...Who are you, and what the hell are you doing in my house?" Timmy asked. The teen blinked, then slapped his face and laughed. "Oh ho, of course! Where are my manners?" The stranger said. He turned around with his back to the completely clueless people, before he whirled back around and pointed like Amelia off of 'Slayers'. "Evil villains beware! I am the defender of otaku justice, sexy girls, and apple pie!" He then started doing stupid poses similar to the Great Saiyaman's. "For I am...Luke Skyskipper!" Luke announced, putting his fingers on top of his head.
Timmy just stared sweatdropping, while Cosmo looked at Wanda and twirled his finger in circles to indicate cuckoo and rolled up his eyes to emphasis it. Wanda let a snort of laughter. "Hey! I thought that was the best I've done since starting this gig!" Luke frowned, crossing his arms. "And how long have you been doing this?" Wanda smirked. "Eh...maybe for two years." Luke said. "Haven't really thought about it." "Well...I guess we don't have to look for help in the yellow pages, eh?" Wanda asked her companions. They then started laughing their asses off. "It's not funny!" Luke yelled at them. "If you're gonna...make fun of me, then take this!"
Cosmo stopped laughing and his eyes started getting flinty as Luke whirled around and kissed Wanda's hand. "You're hot, you know that?" He said, smiling seductively. Cosmo growled and tripped the teen, making him grab onto Wanda for balance but fell to the ground anyway. Luke's face turned red as he found himself on top of her, and his hands were on her chest. Cosmo's eyes was full of fire and his teeth sharp as a cat's as he realized Luke was groping his wife. "No! Wait! It's not what it looks like!" Luke tried to explain. "HOW DARE YOU GROPE MY WIFE YOU SICK BASTARD!!!!" He screamed in rage, punching the teen into the stratosphere. "Holy crap!!" Timmy said as he looked up in awe at the hole in his ceiling. Cosmo snorted, dusting off his hands and helped Wanda up.
"Do you always get jealous when other guys look at me?" She teased. "Moi? Of course not." Cosmo said casually. Timmy's eyebrow went up, knowing how inconceivable that was. "So...how long is Luke gonna be up there?" Wanda asked. Cosmo checked his watch. "He's coming in three...two..." They then heard a scream and a sound effect that sounded suspiciously like a falling cartoon character, and Luke came crashing into the ground, creating a two-foot deep hole. "First rule...of being a bishoujo trainer...never...hit on someone else's wife." Luke's dazed voice came from the hole. "Or else you'd get a serious Smackdown from a very pissed off guy..." He then passed out. "Do you think that was too much, Cosmo?" Timmy asked. "Nah...he deserved it." Cosmo smirked.
"Look here, the only reason we "need" your help, is to fight against another anime otaku." Timmy explained to Luke as soon as he woke up from his three-hour slumber given to him graciously by Cosmo. "Oh I get it...otaku against otaku, eh?" Luke asked. "Uh yeah. I said that a few seconds ago." He rolled his eyes. The red-haired teen put on a smile and rolled his shirtsleeves up. "Well, I can't resist a good fight. Where is he so I can beat the crap out of him?" "Her." Cosmo corrected.
"...Her? ...Sorry guys...I can't beat up a girl. She's probably cute and can't resist good-looking guys like me." Luke said. Cosmo looked at Timmy and Wanda with flat eyes. "All in favor of shooting the poor defenseless bastard?" he asked. Timmy raised his hand along with Cosmo's own. "All those opposed?" Wanda raised her hand. "Sorry, majority rules." Cosmo said, smiling fakely. "Time to get your ass shot off, Skyskipper." He growled, loading his wand in a manner of a shotgun. As Luke heard the click, he laughed nervously and stepped slowly away. "...Or, I could change my mind and help you in every way I possibly can." Cosmo put on a smile and put down his wand.
"I knew you'd break sometime." Luke swallowed and managed to grin. "Eheh...people change you know. So...what do you need help with, oh mighty ones?" "Well, there's this thing called the 'Otaku Curse' that has suddenly afflicted everything in our world." Wanda said. "And then there's the freaky otaku who's stalking my husband and godchild." "How long has this thing had been going on?" Luke asked. "Maybe a month." Timmy said. "Ah, have you guys...?" The red-haired boy started. "What?" Cosmo demanded. "Ever been paired up as a yaoi couple?" He whispered. Timmy and Cosmo looked at each other and blushed. "...YES!!! BUT ITS OBIOTAKU16'S FAULT! SHE STARTED THE WHOLE THING!!" They yelled, pointing at the cloud floating above them.
Luke's eyebrow went up. "...Uh...did you guys ever...?" he started gesturing with his hands. The two bishounen wailed with lots of tears flowing. "...I see..." The trainer said. "I can probably make this freaky otaku leave you guys alone. You guys can tolerate her evilness for a few more months, am I right?" Luke asked. "Yeah, I guess." Cosmo said. "So you'll be able to get rid of the curse too?" Wanda asked hopefully. "What? The anime otaku curse? You mean the thing that affects everything? I don't know anything about that." Luke said. Everyone blinked, then face-faulted to the ground. "YOU MEAN YOU HAVE NO CLUE WHAT YOU'RE DOING??" Cosmo screamed at him.
"Uh...I do know everything except getting rid of the curse." Luke said. "ARGH!!! YOU'RE USELESS!!!" He screamed again. "No I'm not...all we have to do is let it run its course. It will probably fade out eventually. So how hot was your shounen-ai? I bet it was steamy and horny as two rabbits in heat, eh?" Luke asked with a smirk on his face. The bishounen's mouth dropped open. "What did you say?" He asked dangerously. "I said that your shounen-ai was as hot as two rabbits in heat." "Don't forget you said steamy and horny!" Timmy added. Cosmo stared at the bishoujo trainer with evil eyes. "...What does...OUR TEMPORARY SHOUNEN-AI LIFE GOT TO DO WITH YOU, HUH!?" "Ah, so you admit it! You did have hot gay sex!" Luke waggled his finger at him. Cosmo grabbed the teen's shirt, his face now red as a tomato.
"WILL YOU SHUT UP!? JUST TELL US HOW TO GET RID OF MARA BEFORE I KICK YOUR ASS!!!" He screamed. "...Did you say Mara? I know her." Luke said, prying the green-haired fairy's hands off him. "...You know Mara?" They asked. Luke shrugged. "Yeah...she's my girlfriend." "...WHAT?!" Cosmo, Wanda, and Timmy face-faulted to the ground sweatdropping. "HEY!!!" The four people turned to see another fan named CloudRox1 burst into the bedroom with a sign in her hand that said, 'DOWN WITH MARA'. "Join our cause!!!" She yelled. Luke's eyebrow went up, then turned back to the fairies and their teenage godson. "Oh yeah, have you met this otaku named Cloudrox1? She says her job is to appear randomly with many other fangirls the author rounds up to beat up Mara when they find her." Luke explained. CRASH!!
"Hi!" CloudRox1 said, waving at them before running out the door with Ash vault rose garden, Kitsune Ryune and Lita Kino/Sailor Jupiter holding up signs that said, 'BEAT UP MARA! SHE STEALS IDENTITIES!!' And 'MARA MAKES US ANIME OTAKU LOOK BAD! THROW FIREBOMBS AT HER!!' And 'HAHAHA! MARA'S A WHORE! LOL!' Luke sweatdropped. "Hey...it's like, they came out of nowhere or something." He said. "Eh, the author likes writing random stuff for the heck of it. You should see her profile." Cosmo said to him. CRASH!! "...Wow, it's amazing how many times the fourth wall crashes and recovers, eh?" Timmy asked. CRASH!! "...Will you guys stop breaking the fourth wall already??" Wanda demanded.
Howdy y'all! Ain't Luke cool? I bet you're all wondering how a guy like him can fall in love with a girl like Mara! If you thought my other chapters were fun, the next chapter takes the cake! Remember in chapter 6 where Cosmo, Wanda and Timmy go to the mall and the guy asks Cosmo if he was having a pie party? Well...it's the long-awaited pie party and everyone's invited! Except this isn't your average pie party...
In the meantime...
Cosmo: It's not average!? WHAT DOES SHE MEAN??
Timmy: I wonder if ObiOtaku16 is thinking dirty?
(A brick is thrown from the cloud above them, and it conks Timmy unconscious.)
Voice Coming From Cloud: Take that, you sick freak! How dare you say such things!! I own you!!
Cosmo: No you don't. Butch Hartman does.
CRASH!!
Voice Coming From Cloud: NO FAIR!! SINCE I CAN'T OWN YOU, I'M GOING TO REVOLT!! AND I'M GONNA DO IT IN STYLE!! BY TORTURING YOU GUYS IN THE NEXT CHAPTER!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
(Starts typing at a fast pace before going away)
Timmy: (regains conciousness) ...Wha? What happened?
Cosmo: ObiOtaku's angry at us and went to rebel.
Timmy: Rebel in what?
Cosmo: I don't know...but she said something about torturing us.
Timmy: ...Crap...what will make her feel better? Chocolate?
Cosmo: Better not give her reindeer chocolate...but then again...will she be able to tell the difference? Hmm...