He stopped the car again, just down the block from the dance studio. People were spilling out of the space, it seemed no place was quite large enough to contain the grief that the town was feeling. It seemed to mirror Rory's pain in every way.
"So, thanks for coming with me."
"There's no other place I'd be."
"Do you want to come in?"
"Will it make it harder on you, with the questions and everything?"
She seemed to consider this for a moment, weighing how many people would even notice him or remember a happier time when he used to escort her around this small town. No one had mentioned him to her since word of the accident got around—Lorelai had made sure no one bothered Rory about the entire incident. Of course she'd known that everyone had discussed her very private pain, but she had been so glad at the time for the lack of mention to her personally. Her breaking point was always just at the surface for so long back then.
Not that it was so high now.
Her silence gave him his answer. He was ready to go if she didn't want him. After all this time he shouldn't have expected a different outcome.
"No, I'd like you to come in."
He looked up at her, in honest surprise. "Okay. Yeah, I'll come."
She smiled, and he immediately got out of the car and moved to get her door for her. People looked at her with sympathy as they approached the door. He could feel her weakening again, and moved to put his arm around her shoulder to help support her. She didn't shirk him off, rather, she moved closer to his frame.
"Rory, darling, come here!"
"Hi, Patty. Thank you, for doing all this," she said, pulling away from Tristan just long enough to kiss Patty's cheek. The older woman pulled Rory to her, holding her for just a beat too long. Rory became uncomfortable and moved back to Tristan.
"Anything for you, honey, anything. You let us know if we can do anything else?"
"I will. I should make the rounds," she nodded. Patty smiled sadly, and brought her hanky back up to her own face as she turned away.
"Are you sure you're up to all this? Maybe Luke had the right idea, maybe you should," Tristan began to whisper in her ear.
"RORY!"
The two whipped around, as Tristan was interrupted mid-sentence. Rory stepped back, and he looked from her to the man that was moving towards her quickly.
"My God, I came as soon as I heard, are you all right?"
The other man moved to pull her to him, and she looked over his shoulder at Tristan. He looked at her questioningly, but she continued to look shanghaied. Different from her expression this morning as he stood in front of her, wiping away her tears. She now looked shell-shocked and cornered.
"Of course you're not all right! Have you eaten anything, you look frightfully thin," the man pulled back slightly and gave her a once over before noticing Tristan standing next to them.
"Oh, hello. I'm sorry; I didn't notice anyone there. I'm Connor Reeves," the man held out a hand to Tristan. "Who are you?"
"Uh, Connor, could you go get me some water?" Rory interjected suddenly. He nodded, obviously confused by her reaction, but moved off to fulfill her request. She moved immediately towards Tristan.
"You need to go."
"What, why? Who is that?"
"Please, Tristan. I appreciate you being here, earlier, but you have to go. Please."
Her tone was urgent, and he couldn't for the life of him figure out why she didn't want him to interact with Connor. He wondered if this was the husband, or if she'd really gone through with the wedding. She wasn't wearing a ring, and if this was her husband, why was he just finding out about Lorelai? His head hurt from holding in all these questions, though he was asking with his eyes.
"Okay."
He turned to go, to walk out of her life yet again. She stood watching him for a beat, but couldn't seem to will her feet to stay planted. She hurried after him, catching him just as he got out the door, and pulled him off to the side.
"Come by the house, later. I'll be there, alone," she said, moving to kiss his cheek before disappearing back inside the studio.
He watched her disappear, standing in place mesmerized. He looked around, recognizing too many faces, and got into his car heading back out of town.
-
Tristan pulled up to the Gilmore residence hours later, wondering if she were there yet. He'd gone back to Hartford, trying to rest, but no sleep would come to him. At long last, he'd abandoned trying to stay away, and returned yet again.
He got out of his car and walked up to the front door. He knocked, and moments later the door opened.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Luke crossed his arms over his chest as he stepped out onto the porch.
"Uh, is Rory here?" he asked, suddenly nervous.
"Look, I'm sure you have no idea, but Rory's mom just," Luke began, the color drained from his face.
"Luke, I know. I was with her, earlier. She asked me to come by."
"She doesn't need you around. You weren't there for her before," he started.
"That was years ago."
"I think you should go."
The two men stared at each other, seemingly never going to agree on this point.
"Luke!" Rory's voice rang out, as she hurried up the walk. She saw the two men, looking as if they were having a stare-down. "When did you get back?"
"I'm not really here, I just forgot something," he muttered. "Do you need me to stay?"
"No, Luke, thanks. You can go."
He looked at her, then Tristan. "Fine. I'll have my cell on, if you need anything."
"Thanks, Luke," she smiled at him gratefully, as he picked up a bag and walked off to his truck.
She turned to Tristan, and gave him a hesitant smile. "You okay?"
"I'm fine."
She fidgeted nervously, tucking her hair behind her ear. "I think, maybe we should talk. Is that okay?"
He nodded, wondering just how this would go. He'd tried to imagine it over the last few years, as had she. Neither had been successful in seeing something that would bring the other back into their life. Both hated that this was the circumstance.
He followed her into the house, and it was like walking into a time capsule. Almost nothing was changed, save the absence of the dressmaker dummy. The last time he'd been in the house, it'd been in the middle of the front room, with the dress that Lorelai was making for Rory on it.
He was late to pick her up, as usual. He'd been on time for their first official date, and both women had scolded him relentlessly for doing so. He let himself into the house, only to find that not only was Rory not ready, but she was standing on a pedestal wearing a half finished dress that Lorelai was placing pins into as Rory turned slowly around in a circle, a soda in one hand and a New Yorker in the other.
"Oh, now, come on!" he protested the sight.
"Hey, if I don't get this done, she's going to be going commando under her gown next week," Lorelai said with pins between her teeth. "And as much as I'm for spicing up the ceremony, I'd prefer it to be someone else's kid that provides the show."
Rory giggled and continued her small circle. "It'll just be five minutes. We're just hemming."
"All right. So, are you going to make me something fancy to wear?" he teased Lorelai.
"I thought you'd never ask, how do you feel about pink?" Lorelai's eyes sparkled maniacally as she looked up to him from Rory's dress.
"OW! That's flesh under the fabric!" Rory protested.
"Sorry, Babe. All done, go take it off," she instructed. Rory jumped down and went down the hall. Tristan stood from the couch, moving to follow her.
"Oh, no, forget it, Loverboy. You stay away in here and entertain me."
He smirked. "Oh, Lorelai, I knew you couldn't resist me."
She rolled her eyes. "Careful, I have pins and I know how to use them."
Rory came out five minutes later, as promised, to find them chatting, and she handed the dress back to her mother. Lorelai situated it on the dummy, and asked what their plans were for the evening.
"Grandfather asked us to have dinner at his house, and Richard and Emily will be joining us."
"Uh-oh."
Rory looked at her mother. "Don't say it."
"I'm sorry, I just wish you luck. Much luck. I wish you Buckingham Palace filled with four-leaf clovers worth of luck."
"Grandpa is behind this."
"Emily isn't. She doesn't think you two should be so serious. And she's vocal about it. It's like a trained parrot, and she calls me saying 'She's too young, she's too young.'"
"Yeah, well, she doesn't get to decide this," Rory smiled, taking Tristan's hand. "Janlan thought the get together would warm her up to the fact that two years has passed and this isn't fleeting."
"Well, if you need help blinking again, come back here, and I'll force feed you both ice cream and take out the wire taps she'll have placed on your persons," Lorelai smiled, patting them both on the back.
"Thanks, Mom. Night," she kissed her cheek.
Tristan looked back at the room as he held the door open for Rory, and saw Lorelai cranking up the stereo before moving back over to kneel in front of the dummy, set for a night of finishing Rory's graduation dress.
"Would you like something to drink?"
He shook his head. "Can we not do the formalities, I think we're way beyond that."
She looked up at him, not surprised, but unsure. He was right, but the formality was all that she knew right now. He wanted it to be like it was, well, she wasn't sure it was possible. She also wasn't sure they knew any other way.
"O-okay."
"Who was that guy?"
"Connor?"
He nodded, still standing next to the couch. She sat on the coffee table, looking down at her hands.
"He was my husband."
"Was?"
"We got a divorce. I left, two years ago."
"You met him at Yale?"
She shook her head. "No, after that. I was in Namibia, teaching."
"Africa?"
She nodded. His mind was racing, with more questions than before. "What were you doing there?"
"Teaching. I joined the Peace Corps right out of college. I wanted. . . I wanted so much. I wanted to live and see another world. I wanted to make a difference. I was still so broken, I don't know if that makes any sense."
"Broken?"
"Emotionally," she looked up at him quickly. "Nothing made much sense after you left. I got through college and just needed to get away from everything I knew."
"Funny. That's why I went into the army."
"That's right. And you're out now?"
"My time was up. I could have stayed longer, made it a career track, but I don't want that. I've seen the world, but now I think it's time for me to be here, find out what I really want to do."
She listened to him, relieved to hear about his life. She'd wondered about him every day for the last nine years. And she'd had a very vivid imagination. What he wasn't telling her was the one thing that had truly plagued her since the last night she'd seen him.
"Why didn't you come back to me?"
He looked into her eyes, his heart breaking for the pain in her voice. He wasn't sure if she was really up for this conversation now, but one thing was for sure. He was going to have to answer her.
AN: Again, thanks for the reviews. I know it's sad, but that was why I added the 'non-fluffy' warning. I know after tonight's eppy, the angst and sadness was flowing. I cried for most of the hour. The show was just heart breaking tonight. I digress.