Chapter 36: The Love Shack
A week or so later.
It had been a typical "summons." Bill had called Beatrix with a new assignment and she headed over to his place to get the details. Bill had sounded his typical annoyingly calm self on the phone. There seemed to be nothing out of sorts. But, apparently something had happened in the short ten minutes or so it had taken Beatrix to get to his place. When Nikishi answered the door, she looked a little rumpled...which was saying a lot, because she was a pretty hardy woman. She looked up at the tall blonde with thin lips. "You better go talk to Bill, Beatrix..." she lowered her voice, "He's not happy...at all." With that, she scuttled away...far away no doubt. She'd been around Bill long enough to know when the man's righteously nasty temper was about to flare up.
Upon entering the backyard it was easy to spot Bill. He was pacing around the raised courtyard; arms crossed...his cell phone clutched in one hand. Once again barefoot and black panted, but at least he'd lost that revolting 70's western shirt, to something more typical of his attire. His hair was a little tussled, and one look at him and it was easy to tell he was irate. The posture, the facial expression...the very air around him...
He spun at the first sight of Beatrix on the lawn. His expression was rather unsettling. "KIDDO!" He pointed to the ground, at a spot a few feet from him, "HERE! NOW!" Bill rarely yelled, but when he did...it was more than a little scary.
Beatrix stood in the patio doorway with a classic expression that read; what the fuck did I do? She was clad in a pair of black tinted jeans and an off white v-neck t-shirt with a pair of blue strapped sandals. Those locks of blonde hair were down to veil against her face and drape against her shoulders. Her face looked considerably better, the swelling had dissipated, bruises were fading, and the radiant red marks were now mere thin pink lines along her softened skin. All in all she was healing nicely and her ego was healing just as well. Considering everything that had happened in the past week Beatrix was able to go back to the way things were but acquired a thicker layer of skin along the way.
She cringed at Bill's alarming tone of voice. She didn't want to further fume that anger and as an obedient dog she came directly to the spot he pointed at. Her expression was well composed as she stared at him, utter confusion evident in her eyes. "Yes, Bill?"
Beatrix's obedience didn't seem to have any effect on Bill's anger, in fact...he only seemed to get more angry upon her closer presence. He stood in his spot, simply staring at her for at least thirty seconds...his brown eyes drilling into hers with an almost limitless amount of hostility. His right hand was clutched so tightly around his cell phone, the poor piece of machinery seemed lucky to still be intact in that grip. At times like this, it almost seemed as if Bill had the ability to not blink at all...finally, his frozen features moved.
"Do you remember," He began in a tight, barely controlled tone of voice,"...that little assignment I sent you on...oh...let's say about a month or so ago? Hrm? A woman...about your age...I don't even remember her fucking name...and her daughter?" He didn't even give Beatrix time to respond, "Yes, of course you do...because you didn't finish it!" With that, he turned and threw the cell phone off the edge of the courtyard, where it landed with a "plump" in the Japanese fountain nearby.
Now, without anything to clutch onto...Bill was forced to cross his arms, "Well...I just received a phone call. It seems that bitch you should have killed, turned around and hired a hit man...who in turn killed the father of her child...and MY FUCKING client!" He darted out a hand, pointing it at Beatrix, "Not just any fucking client Kiddo...but one of my best, if not the best one I've ever had. Can you begin to understand what a loss this is to me?" He snarled, "Maybe you don't...because obviously you don't seem to care...because if you did...you would have gone through with the goddamn assignment!" Looking a little flushed, Bill threw his hands up, making a small pivot in exasperation, "JESUS CHRIST! If I had sent anybody," the finger point again, closer to her face, "ANYBODY...else...this wouldn't have happened! But no," he sneered, revealing a wolfish grin, "I had to send...Miss Beatrix Bleeding Heart Kiddo..." his voice dropped into a pit of complete sarcasm, "...the deadliest woman in the world...and my best assassin." His head titled to the side, in an equally sarcastic gesture.
Beatrix held back an action to bite his fucking finger off, the one that kept on dauntingly pointing at her and being overly dramatic. For once Beatrix was holding more control then Bill was. Her expression was calm, although blue eyes flashed, and her arms were casually stuck to her sides. As emotionless as her façade came she was brimming on the inside. She was baffled that the woman had gone and called a goddamn hit man. Hadn't she told her to get out of town? Apparently she didn't take her advice. Bitch. Now Beatrix was left with repercussions.
What really irked the tall blonde was Bill's continued mocking of names and complete lack of...anything. This was Bill at his finest. She didn't want that. Thank God this had to happen today and not last week. She wouldn't have been able to handle this as she was currently in the process of doing. It would have been too much but now, with that thickened layer, she could take it.
Her lips tightened and she finally spoke up, slowly but with added malice, "I can't say I'm sorry, I can't reprimand my actions," her eyes narrowed in on him, "And I can not ask for mercy." A heart beat. "I have nothing to say."
Bill visibly clenched his teeth. "Oh no! You're not going to play that "say nothing" card this time Kiddo!" He took a threatening step towards her, "I want you...RIGHT NOW...to explain yourself in plain fucking English!" Yes, Bill generally was a calm person...in that killing bastard sort of way, but right now...he was out of control. When he was younger...when he lacked so much control, he had done some heinous things under the direction of his currently flaring temper. As the years had progressed, he had learned means to become calmer...more in tune with himself, but it was not a flawless system. At times, like now...it broke down...and the true murdering asshole came out. This was the man that had first learned how to handle women from a pimp...
"No lies! No vague explanations!" He roared in her face, "Your fucking idiotic act is what made me lose this client! And you owe me more than a simple...apology. You get no mercy and your not getting let off...not this time...your going to talk to me..." He grabbed her by the collar, a rare move for Bill...and gave her a small shake, "Start talking." he hissed in a deadly whisper.
Point taken, Beatrix could only keep her own aspect of control for so long. She was never good at it to begin with and when she attempted to gain an upper hand in that area, if she lost it she lost it fast. Her pretty blue eyes flashed with ultimate enmity. "First, get your fucking hands off me," she stated in an overly slow and appalled tone. She put a hand around his forearm and pushed it down and away from her with distinguished strength, even if he was already letting off.
Beatrix tenderly stroked her hands over her shirt to get out the wrinkles as she took her dandy time coming up with a reply. She didn't do this just to irk him, she really was thinking. Her eyes leveled back to him. Electric sparks admitted between their daunting eye lock. "I explained myself already," she began coolly but her tone was laced with fire. She didn't know why the fuck she had to explain herself to him when he never explained himself to her. Fuck the employee/boss aspect of it. "I couldn't do it. I'm a bleeding heart. And, that part of me...that part you are utterly furious at, that's the part that is never gonna change." She took a threatening step forwards, the tips of their toes touching but upper bodies didn't meet. "I will always be one step below you and I will never step over that line that puts me at your level. You can either accept that...or...not. I won't change."
Bill raised his chin in a trademark haughty expression. "A bleeding heart assassin...well isn't that just an interesting paradox now isn't it?" His fists were balled up at his sides, in an obvious effort not to lay his 'fucking' hands on her again. He'd hit women before without prior physical provocation, and right now...he would have no problem doing it again.
He raised a flippant eyebrow, "At my level...and what prey tell is...my level?" He was taunting her, that much was obvious. "If you can't step up to this supposed level, then what the fuck exactly are you doing working for me?" That was low, and he knew it...a sneer crossed his face...not breaking their staring war. "You say you hate all these things about me...and yet...your still here aren't you? Well, isn't that just fucking strange Kiddo! You really are confused...You know," his voice dropped again, "...those five years ago...when I first saw you...I knew what you could be...and now here you stand almost there. Yet, you say you won't step up...you wont' change..." He pushed a finger into her shoulder, further taunting her, "You have nobody but yourself to blame for that...I can't do anymore...and I won't accept that you can't become what I want you to be." His eyes narrowed threateningly, "Nobody does that to me and lives..."
Beatrix's staring war of hostility had been flipped over to a stare of surprise. Her jaw unhinged and she felt herself morally wounded. How the fuck could he say that to her? Well, of course he 'could' say it but she never thought he would, or could say that to her. It hurt and she masked it over with a hard demeanor and hateful eyes but as much as she tried dangerous emotions were seeping through.
She did the only thing she could think of, she stepped away. She recoiled from him, not out of fear. He was mad at her, irate, furious, pissed off beyond recognition, she understood that but she also understood that he was over reacting. He'd never hit her, he'd never harm her, he wouldn't dare.
She pursed her lips and regained herself. "I...can't become what you want and I...am...sorry if you can't accept that. But, when all is said and done do you really want me to be what you want?" She raised both brows challengingly. "Think about it, Bill. Think...real...hard."
"No I don't!" Bill shouted, before he really had time to think about what he was saying...he said it so quickly, it didn't have time pass through his usual detached intellectual filter...it was a completely raw statement. He looked a little shocked with himself for a split second, but he was too riled up to stop now, "And I hope you never do!" He kept shouting, because he was afraid to speak any lower, "...because...if you became what I needed you to become then I wouldn't l-" He bit down on his words, snarling.
With that he turned away violently, and flung himself at the nearby sword rack. He yanked out one of the wooden practice swords with a scary amount of viciousness, but he didn't turn towards Beatrix with the weapon. Instead, taking the sword in hand, he literally swung it at the entire rack, easily smashing the whole thing down. Happy with those results, he then threw the sword at the nearby shed...which it hit with a loud thud.
"Goddamn you Kiddo!" He turned on her, with a wild look, "Do you think I haven't fucking thought about it?"
The tall blonde was keeping calm, overly calm but she was slowly fading down. The sword in his hand even though it was wood still held a threat to her. Even when she was angry it was never good for her to have a weapon in check. A weapon could project further anger and hostility in areas that didn't deserve them.
She wanted to take another step back and away from...this...man. But that would show she was fearful of him and that would give him an unnecessary satisfaction. She held her ground and started, "You obviously haven't thought enough because if you had you would be able to see the irrational logic in your decision." She felt like a snake trying to coax a rabbit out of its hole. The rabbit wasn't that stupid and the snake was far from that itself, it making it a lose/lose situation. Beatrix's calm facade was only irritating him further.
"Irrational decision?" Bill breathed, through rasps of angry breaths, "Well of course it's irrational...where did I ever say it was rational? Because if I did, please do point it out to me...a little rationality would be quite nice at the moment." How could he explain how he felt? He could...but the words were too hard to say...it was simply too much of a risk. It was far easier to be a fucking asshole about it.
"Oh," he raised a dangerous eyebrow, finger waving again, "I think I've thought enough about it...longer than you'll ever know...longer than you've realized...and...sometimes I wonder, longer than you've deserved." He wanted to get a reaction out of her, anything...he'd take anything at this moment...
"I..." he took a step back, hand in front of him, "...don't think you...of all people have any right to tell me about irrationality."
Beatrix had to regroup a moment. How the fuck had all this started? How did a simple...well...not simple quarrel of views become such a cruel exchange of words? Everything he was saying, every signal ounce of it wasn't just because he was pissed off at her about the assignment, an assignment that happened a month ago, it was something more...much more. She couldn't fathom what it was and that made her blood boil.
She cracked her knuckles at her sides and blinked hard. Now that she could see more clearly she could give him the reaction that he didn't want. She wasn't going to yell back, that was below her manner of dealing with things now that she was...older. "Of course," she didn't move or raise her voice. "The rational should never try to argue the irrational."
Bill threw his hands up, she was driving him fucking crazy with her little placid attitude.
"And what the fuck is that supposed to mean?" He laughed, a short bitter laugh, "Oh, wait...scratch that...you're not going to give me a straight answer anyways. You," his eyes widened briefly, "...Kiddo...are a pathological liar, more than I think even I will ever hope to be. Congratulations! In that account, you're a step higher..." he clapped his hands loudly in front of her face, making every attempt to piss her off.
He then waved an angry hand, "Fuck you..." he turned his back on her, heading for the shed...for who knew what reasons, "I'm done with this..."
That, that pissed her off. "You. Fucking. Asshole," she grated through one breath. Beatrix then took off after him, following at his heels. "You say, you do all of that and your just walking away!" She exclaimed. This confused the hell out of her. Usually it was the woman that walked away in a fit.
She took two long strides and cut him off before he reached the shed door and blocked his entrance. Her blue eyes were ablaze with cold fury. "You're not done with this." Any bit of a placid demeanor she was holding earlier was a thing of the past. "You can't walk away like---this! Not after you, taunted, degraded, ripped apart, corrupted, and fucked me over like that," This time she pointed the finger. "No goddamn fucking way."
A small satisfied smirk crossed Bill's face...finally, she'd cracked and it was damn good to see. He made sure she saw him gloat for a good few seconds placing the most sneering smirk he could possibly pull on his face.
"I can walk away from you whenever and however I want to...not to mention do whatever the fuck I want to do." He stared her down. He hated being cut off...goddamnit...that really pissed him off. A hand snapped up and gripped her wrist which was barring his way across the door...his grip painfully hard. "Now, move...out of my way...or I'll move you myself..." To emphasize this, he tightened his grip. "And believe me Kiddo...I will move you in a far from gentle manner," he fixed her with a blistering glare, "You can go fuck yourself, because as I said before...I have nothing else to say to you..." It seemed Bill's outright rage had been replaced by a more typical but far more venomous cold anger, at least, for the moment.
Beatrix wasn't about to play the 'oh, now look who's playing the say nothing card' when he had said far more than she had. So, she took the next plan of action. She didn't move and she didn't make any signs that he was hurting her. She kept a firm façade and blue eyes returned the stare down. Bill had been given the satisfactory feeling that he had gotten to her and effectively so but he was not going to get her to move.
A venomous smile tugged at her taut lips, her chin tilted up, and she breathed, "No," and with the highest amount of pride in her voice she reinstated, "I won't move."
Bill's chin tilted down towards his chest, as he fixed her with a sharp glare. An amused smirk touched his face. So, she wanted to play this little game...well...fine...but he wasn't about to hold back...not one bit. "Have it your way Kiddo..." he whispered and before she had time to react, he bent down and slammed a shoulder into her midsection. Driving forward, he scooped her up onto his shoulder, in a standard fireman's type of carry. As he continued to step into the shed, she was forced to let go of the doorframe. He knew carrying her like this for longer than a few seconds would allow her time to get a good shot at him. So, pivoting slightly, he slammed her back first onto the ground...the move looking like something off of cheesy television wrestling.
She landed hard on her back, and Bill wisely took a few steps away from her...knowing full well what she would probably do next. She wouldn't get away with that this time. He began walking in a slow circle around her, like some bloodthirsty shark measuring up its prey. "Back down on the ground...yet again..." he chuckled, again knowing exactly how to press those buttons of hers.
Beatrix stayed on the ground, blue eyes staring up at the ceiling, and her cheeks puffed out as she took exasperated breathe. Bill had gotten her on the floor numerous times during training and she never liked it but with her current dilemmas she hated it far more than before. She rolled over onto her side and using her hands pushed her upper body off the ground. Her face was beginning to gleam with sweat and trickled down the curves of her neck. Her gaze watched him steadily and cautiously as he circled, investigating his intentions. If he wanted to play dirty then she'd more than happily play along.
The tall blonde warrior darted up to her feet and without any invitation she came at him with a demonstration of kung-fu mixed with street fighting. Bill evaded them easily and Beatrix had to back off a moment. She was letting anger control her actions. And if she continued to allow so she wouldn't get anywhere. Fists clenched at her sides as she waited for him to come in if he choose to. She didn't want to fight, she didn't want to argue but he gave her no choice. Bastard.
It was almost as if Bill was looking for an excuse to fight, and her actions more than easily gave him that. He threw a few kicks at her head, but she was far too tall...and he couldn't kick as high as he used to be able to...she easily dodged them all. He changed angles and came at her with a flurry of kung fu techniques: claws at her eyes, randomly angled punches, elbows...a knee to her chest...she easily blocked these with her own limbs. He did manage to hit her on the side with a palm strike, but it was a minor hit.
Falling back, hands moving gracefully in front of him in traditional kung fu style, Bill watched her closely. He looked completely fired up. There was a dangerous spark behind his intense look. "If you not going to properly fight me..." he breathed with increasing speed, "Then I'm just going to be forced to kick your ass." He wiped a sheen of sweat off of his face, falling into a smirk. "And I assure you, for me, that's going to be quite pleasurable."
What boggled Beatrix in the first place was why he wanted to fight her. Botching that assignment was a reason to be upset with her but not to full out want to harm her. Bill had something up his ass, she knew it but she couldn't place it. She used the back of her hand to wipe away her own gleams of sweat. The last thing she wanted was her ass kicked when in her mind she didn't deserve it. She couldn't allow it. Being the tactful, trained killer she was meant to be, she came into her display of tiger-crane style and pushed all emotions to the darker regions of her mind. Blue eyes flashed and she didn't mutter a word. When Beatrix was really pissed off she didn't speak or not many words were exchanged between herself and her opponent.
Her lips tightened and she shook her head gravely at his actions. A second passed before she came back at him with a bout of high kicks and slashing. Bill blocked most and the ones she did manage to connect weren't worthy of a flinch. Finally she came back around to face him and delivered a spin house kick to his gut, this time she connected.
Bill doubled over, clutching at his stomach...there was nothing to do be done about that, he just had to deal. He took a few quick breaths, attempting to take in some lost air, and stood up, a hand still wrapped around his stomach.
He chuckled; apparently amused he'd just been kicked in the gut. But the smile dropped, and suddenly he was completely intense. He came at her very quickly, his punches rapid and with a sense of true purpose. Luckily, Beatrix was damn good and she blocked all of them...because if she hadn't...it could have gotten ugly. With directed strikes, he began driving her back...it wasn't because he was necessarily better; it was simply a matter of intensity. With the right amount of intensity you could drive nearly anybody back at your whim.
That smoldering glint in his eye that had been there before was only intensifying but it wasn't the typical murderous glint, it was something else and it was beginning to take over the anger that had been there before.
The inevitable happened, and Beatrix's back slammed into the wall...luckily there was a training mat resting up against the wall, that padded part of her back as it connected with the hard wood.
Bill threw one more punch and he stopped in mere millimeters in front of her nose. "Gotcha," he breathed in a husky tone, blazing look fixated upon her.
Beatrix blinked hard seconds after his fist stopped. She had almost expected him to go through with the punch and that probably been the only reason she flinched or in this case blinked. Blue eyes peered past his balled up fist to search his cold and hard brown eyes. She wasn't sure what she was searching for but there was something beyond his hostile actions and murderous glints and she couldn't find it.
It was driving her fucking crazy. The mere fact that he was showing her something that he had never shown her before and she couldn't figure out what the hell it was. Her chest heaved up and down with labored breaths, her angelic and yet deadly features were coated with a thick gloss of sweat, and her temperature was bitterly chilly. No more fighting, she didn't want to. Yes, she was irate with him but that wasn't getting them anywhere. "What," she breathed through her gasping breaths, "Are you trying to do?"
Bill's hand, the one that had been frozen in midair in front of her face, moved behind her head and planted flat palmed against the wall. Like Beatrix, his face was covered in a layer of sweat, his hair falling across his face. His breathing was equally as labored and a good amount of sweat was showing through his shirt. He continued to watch her in silence for a few seconds.
And then, Bill did a complete 180. Every ounce of anger and hostility melted away and became replaced with complete adoration and wanting. His hard brown eyes now looked almost, well deep and soulful for lack of better words. He slid closer to her, so that he was pressed up against her...not forcefully, Beatrix would never have that, but wantingly.
He leaned in, so that his face was mere inches from hers. "I'm trying..." he whispered, looking completely intoxicated, "...to tell you that, despite all my best efforts to not be so, I'm desperately in love with you...Beatrix Kiddo...," a gentle smile, completely devoid of any prior venom or sarcasm, "...I think I have been for longer than I was first willing to admit..." He continued to whisper to her in a barely audible voice, as if the walls themselves had ears, and what he had to say was for her...and her only. "...I've never loved anybody as much as I do you...that's the absolute truth. And, as you can see...I have no idea how to handle it...being an asshole was the only way I could manage to keep sane...and...I'm sorry for what I've done and said to you...all of it...every single word...every single action..." Needless to say, this was a once in a lifetime sort of confession for Bill. He leaned his sweaty forehead against her own, shutting his eyes, he kept speaking, "I know I'm a real dick...a bastard, a miserable fucker...but that's what I am Kiddo...and I don't expect you to feel the same way towards me...but...I had to tell you this...or I was going to go crazy...I was just going to keep hurting you in a pathetic attempt to tell you that I love you. I had...to stop that cycle...and I have chosen to stop it now...at this very moment..."
With that last word, he quickly closed the miniscule distance between their two faces and kissed her deeply. With this kiss it was as if all the rage and hostility he had been displaying earlier had really been intended for this action. His intentions had been misplaced before, and now they were in their right place. He learned into her...he knew she was either going to love this or hate this...and he would know which one very soon.
Whoever the fuck came up with the saying 'you only hurt the ones you love' was really onto something. Beatrix was between the point of hating and loving this. The first day she had placed her lips to his she knew she'd be a whore for those kisses, no matter the circumstance. In this case, she raised her hand inches from his cheek in an attempt to slap him. This would have been the logical choice but instead she simply laid an open palm against his face and pushed into the kiss.
Beatrix made sure this kiss lasted because in the process she went through a major thought process. She knew he was up to something but she never fathomed it to be this. Perhaps his intentions were misplaced but she knew they were subconsciously intended all along. This made her furious. Yes, everything he had just said was perfect, it was romantic, corny, sentimental, and truthful; it was everything an ideal relationship would want. But did she want it?
Of course she did. This was what she had been hoping for and for one reason or another once she knew she had it, it was hard to grasp the concept. If Bill hadn't projected his anger like that than maybe Beatrix would be having an easier time...believing him? No, she believed him. She knew what he said was utter and bitter truth. But she was having difficulty with something and it was making more then just her back ache.
Finally she broke the kiss and her thinking completed, if that was possible. Lids were half draped over blue hues which were pointed to the ground. Her lips parted and closed and parted again before she spoke, keeping that level of whisper he spoke with, "That was sweet." She laughed light heartedly at her vague response and the hints of a real smile began to grace her features.
Bill returned the genuine smile, his free hand coming up to rest on top of her own...the one that had been so poised to slap him. Among other warm emotions on his face, there was a look of complete satisfaction there as well. He hadn't realized how badly he'd needed to get that out, to tell her that, until now. Part of him wished he'd done this earlier...there could have been much anger and hostility avoided between the two of them. But, he also knew he hadn't of been ready to do this until now. He realized as well, that he had to get himself so completely angry to enable himself to come back around full circle. It seemed a little ridiculous, but that was simply the way he worked.
Most of that shit he'd said to her had just been recycled fodder from over the years. He'd just delivered it in a more pointed manner. Sure, he'd been upset about the killed client, but he knew now that wasn't the real catalyst behind his outrage. All he had to do was look at her now, like this, to know what the real catalyst was.
"I tried," he replied to her...still whispering, his hand moving up to rake through her hair, "If only there was a way to be sweet while being a real bastard about it...I'd be far better at it," a smile, that quickly dropped into a more serious expression, "I say a lot Kiddo but I really don't know how to please..." He searched her face, but it was difficult to tell what she was thinking. He knew she had to be completely confused at this sudden change and probably still quite mad at him. He'd take that...he had deserved it.
Beatrix was so confused but there was no avoiding the complete rain of warmth in her eyes. Pushing aside the fact that she was still irate with him she came to see how the puzzle pieces were being put together. The facts finally emerged. He didn't just 'love' her, he was 'in love' with her. That put a whole new reel of thoughts in her head. All of it was just as confusing. She idly leaned her face into his and placed a small kiss on the edge of his mouth. "You're efficient in both areas," she whispered in reply.
Bill smiled gently at her response, eyes closing as if he was taking in a banquet of sensations. He could smell her, still taste her...a thick cloud of pheromones was emitting from her, if she aware of it or not...and he felt...well, somewhat tipsy from it all. "I have my moments," he replied in a slightly egomaniacal tone of whisper, as he bent his head to nuzzle his face into the crook behind her ear. She was sweaty, but hell, so was he...and besides...it only added to her already intoxicating appeal.
"I can't say I've had too many complaints...over the years..." he mumbled into her skin, "Of course...many of those women...didn't have as much experience...as yourself..." he trailed off, lips becoming more concerned with other matters than talking.
She laughed a little but it was unsettling. Beatrix had a hell of a lot of experience and her experience ranged in a wide variety of forms. But she could guess and being pretty accurate at which experience he was pertaining to. This was making her ill at ease. "Right," her voice returned to an inside level. She pulled her head back and hit the padded mat she was still secularly backed up against. She wasn't going to let him get anymore kisses in. Beatrix was finally getting the poisoned tip, or in other words the point of his actions. "You fucking asshole..." she breathed. Her façade was a mixture of confusion and disgust. "You planned this all along." Her lips went taut to display how upset she was. Did he really expect her to succumb to his confession and display of affection? If he did then Bill really didn't know Beatrix all that well.
Bill stared at her agape for a brief second, but the rare show of surprise was quickly taken over with one of anger. That anger had only been simmering beneath a placid fuzzy surface, laying in wait... it didn't take much for it to regain control.
"What the hell are you talking about?" He said in a raised voice, the whispers long gone, "Wait..." a sneer, "...you think I planned this all along? You've got to be fucking kidding me!"
A short bitter laugh, "Sure Kiddo...I was sitting there right before you arrived...writing it all down...Hrm...let's see," he placed a finger on his chin mockingly, "...one...get really fucking angry at her...two...fight her...three...spill emotional guts to her...four...seduce her..." a frown, "That's ridiculous...you can't blame me for the position you're in now...not this time..." He leaned forward again, but this time in anger, "You're here because you wanted to be baby...don't deny it..." Well, that was going to irk the living hell out of her...but right now, Bill didn't care. How dare she accuse him of such a thing...even if...deep down he knew she was partially right...but only partially...
This time Beatrix was the one with the mouth agape for a brief second. Of course it irked the hell out of her, how could it not? Her eyes flashed. Her mind whirled through an array of smart ass remarks she could throw at him for that but for some reason none of them seemed fitting enough. None of them would be able to top off how she really felt.
So, being one for actions over words she went with actions. Blue eyes locked with his own, keeping his gaze and attention, and then out of nowhere she bent up her leg and kneed him harshly in the calf. She wanted to go further up but that seemed unnecessary. This worked. At the sudden surprise, the tall blonde was allowed more room, and quickly slipped out his clutches and made a sprint for the exit.
Goddamn her! Bill let out a growl of frustration and pain, as he was forced to move away and grab at his throbbing leg. But he quickly covered, and with a snarl...although somewhat of an amused one, he watched her slip away and make a run for the open door. "I don't think so..." he mumbled with a smirk. He then proceeded to chase after her with a serious limp. By sheer willpower he managed to catch her, mere feet from the door. He spun her around violently by the shoulders and grabbing her by the face, kissed her rather roughly.
In response, she slapped him...really, really hard. The sound echoed throughout the room.
"Shit!" Bill shouted, hand flying up to his already quite red cheek. He glared at her painfully, "That's it..." and he made a second grab at her, completely undaunted. He was really pissed off at her, but...deep down...this was also rather amusing...
Beatrix tried to make another attempt at grabbing the door knob but her wrist was snatched and held firmly in place. She made an attempt to tug her hand free but he only applied more pressure. It was coming to the point where if he put anymore force on the hold he was likely to fracture a few bones. She gritted her teeth together and glared daggers into him. All she wanted to do was leave and he was making it so goddamn difficult! "Let go of me," she hissed.
"No...not this time Kiddo..." Bill replied, finally managing to yank her hand off of the doorknob...which with Beatrix was no easy task. Still holding onto her wrist with an iron grip he pivoted and side kicked the partially open door completely shut with a loud slam. Frowning, he wrapped her arm around her back, while he remained still facing her...still keeping the hold on her wrist. He checked her other hand at her side with his hip. "I'm not letting you leave this time...not that easily..." he breathed, "Not after what I've gone through...besides," a smirk, "...I don't think you really want to leave all that badly...your faking it." He pulled her even closer, "You could easily get out of this hold...if you really wanted to."
In her mind Beatrix was damning him and the look in her eyes checked with her thoughts. She was so utterly pissed off because he was right. She could get out of this and apply a lot of pain in the process but she didn't want to do that. And the only reason to explain that was she cared about him and never intentionally sought out ways to hurt him emotionally or physically. She wasn't about to admit his truth or become submissive and wrap her arms around him in affection. Ah, that wouldn't be Beatrix Kiddo. So, she tilted her head back and spit a wad of saliva in his face. How much was she 'really' faking now? Bill had called her a pathological liar.
Bill...really...REALLY did no like being spat on. It was so utterly vile and he was somewhat shocked Beatrix had done it. He immediately let go of her wrist, to wipe a hand across his face. He wasn't going to spit back at her, that just wasn't his style...now Budd on the other hand. "That was dirty..." Bill said with a frown, "...and very unladylike..." With some real anger, he shoved her away with both arms, "I still think you're full of shit though..." He glared at her, "Your lying to yourself again...face it Kiddo...when it comes to you...and me...you simply can't admit the truth to yourself...And why? Maybe it's because when you were a horny little fourteen year old fantasizing about men, you never pictured yourself wanting somebody like me...never in your life...I think it disturbs you a little...no...I think it disturbs you quite a bit..." He took a few advancing steps on her, looking quite upset, "You can't quite decide if you're revolted by me or in fact...the complete opposite..." He shoved her again, just for pure spite.
Beatrix stumbled and found herself back up against the wall. Out of returned spite she had the intention to shove him right back but that was child's play. Instead she stared at him with wide eyes and her lips formed a thin line across her irate features. On the inside she felt sick. The fact that he was pointing out truths that she never came to terms with made her stomach churn. She didn't want to hear it anymore, she just wanted to leave.
She swallowed down a foul taste in her mouth. She didn't want to comment on his words and she didn't even want to acknowledge them but she ran out of actions to pose as words. Her features softened but not by much. "Why are you doing this to me?" She chocked out with effort.
Again, she had posed another weighty question on him. One with difficult answers. One he wasn't sure he wanted to answer to...but he'd already began that trend...there was no point in stopping now. Unlike Beatrix, he could tell the truth when it came down to it.
Bill came to a halt a few feet in front of her, face flushed with exertion, anger and a swollen slapped cheek. His features softened, a little, "I'm doing this to you...because I want you to come to terms with things you can't deny...there's no point in lying to yourself when you know the truth. Even if that truth makes you sick. You're hurting me and you're hurting yourself by continuing to deny it," he took a step forward, still keeping his distance from her, his voice dropped, "...so...just...stop..."
There it was all laid out on the table for all to see, including Beatrix. It was over and if she didn't come to terms with this blatant truth everything that she was subconsciously working for would be burned. She didn't want to hurt herself anymore and she didn't want to hurt him. She wanted this to work, she wanted him, and she wanted her confusion cleared. This all could be resolved if she stopped. Easier said than done. Beatrix would make herself accept it and by accepting it she was accepting a whole lot more. She'd never fully accept certain truths especially when it came down to Bill and herself, but for now she could at least try.
She tilted her chin up and head cocked to the side to bring herself back to stature. She didn't say anything but the look in her eyes spoke for her.
There was a few long seconds, where their eyes locked. He could easily read her large eyes...and everything that was said within those limitless blue depths. She hadn't of liked what he'd said...not one bit, but he could see she'd come to some decision.
She would never fully tell herself the truth, she would never fully tell him the truth. Bill knew that, even now. But he could see...at least...for the moment, she was willing to accept a few of those truths. And knowing how difficult that was for her...it meant something to him that she was at the very least...trying. With her decision in mind, Bill closed the remaining distance between them and, grabbing her face, once again kissed her. There was a sense of urgency and definitely some residual anger in this action. She could very well turn around and slap him again...or worse knee him...but, at this point...he was willing to take that risk. He simply didn't care anymore.
Beatrix wasn't left with much of a choice. She returned the kiss. As pissed off as she remained at him she couldn't help but give into temptation. Damn him. Her arms idly wrapped around his torso and she tilted further into him. She was finally giving into the truth which further lead to her giving into him. She was sick of the fighting and quarrels and physical aggression. So instead she replaced it with passion, want, and a little bit of lust. She wasn't going to fully bring herself into this with full out passion or anything close to seduction but she was getting there.
Before Beatrix had enough to get really into things, Bill pulled away roughly...leaving her gasping for air and perhaps leaving her just a little perplexed.
He shoved her shoulder's against the wall, "No..." he pulled his hands away as if they had just been burnt, "I don't want some pity fuck from you...your just giving in because that's easier..." he took a step back, "I want none of that..." Brutal but true. He could get what she had just been offering elsewhere...but he didn't want that from her. He wanted her...as she was...he wanted her, to want him...not to just go along with his whims. He'd had far too much of that in his life and he was sick of it...just as sick as she was with fighting. He knew she was capable of it...he'd felt that true want from her before, but not right now. He buttoned up a few buttons on his shirt that had come undone. "Well, thanks for the quant little bit of forced affection there Kiddo...that was nice..."
"You're welcome," Beatrix replied tartly. How the hell this ended up being what it was she had no idea but she didn't like it. She honestly had no intention of giving him a pity fuck or any fuck for that matter. Her slender brows furrowed in annoyance and resentment. She knew he was right. Why did he have to be so right about everything, especially tonight? That scratched her in tender places.
If she did do anything with him tonight it would be out of pure pity or complete compliance to his wishes. That wouldn't be 'special'.
Beatrix pushed off the wall and came a few steps from him. "Can I leave now?"
Bill had ruined a perfect opportunity, he'd tossed it aside...wasted it...and he knew it... His cruel mouth had always gotten him in trouble in the past...apparently some things never changed. It had started off so well...he'd tried, he really had...but inevitably he fucked it up. Bill rarely loathed much about himself, but right now...he loathed what he'd just done. He felt like a complete ass...which wasn't really a new feeling for him, but it was far more poignant this time.
He waved a hand at the door, "Of course," he mumbled. With a look of remorse, he watched Beatrix silently and furiously leave. He could have told her he was sorry...but his confessional pool had run dry for the day...he was incapable of saying more.
When Beatrix had left, Bill strode over to one of the racks of weapons on the wall and picked out a semi sharp Chinese kung fu style sword. With flaring nostrils, he swung it around fancily for a few seconds...as if attempting to exercise some demon deep within himself. Right in the middle of a swing, he threw it as hard as he possibly could at the nearest wall with a loud yell. The semi-sharp blade embedded a few inches into the wood, the handle vibrating from the impact with a dull hum. Spent, he slumped against the wall. He sat there for sometime.