Bleeding Romantics (and the Nymphomaniac Purebloods That Shag Them)
By DramaPhile
Keywords: Harry Draco Romance Humor Valentine's Day
Rated: R for hot kinky slashy boysex. If this squicks you, go read some Ron/Hermione handholding fic. A more explicit version of this chapter can be found in my Livejournal, which is listed as my homepage in my author profile, or just put in my username, Dramaphile
Warnings: Slash, Bondage, Sexual Situations
Pairings: Harry/Draco,
Disclaimer: If I owned Harry and Draco and the whole HP universe, there would be a whole lot more slashy shagging and a little less of that thing they call plot (and I would have a large mansion in Malibu next door to Brad Pitt). Sadly, I do not own Harry or any of his friends, JK Rowling and her minions do, and therefore, I am only borrowing the little guys for a bit 'o' fun (because they deserve a good shag after all the hell she puts them through!)
Summary: Harry makes an indecent proposal and Draco ends up in a closet with Hermione.
A/N: I really don't think I can thank you guys enough for all the wonderful reviews you leave me! It's so nice to know someone appreciates my writing, and I appreciate all of you! Sorry this chapter took so long, It just didn't seem to want to be written, and took quite a while to actually get down on paper. Then, my computer died and I thought I lost all my data and was very sad and then the amazing Tech dudes at my university saved all my data (and thus are my heroes). Anyway, I finally got my computer up and working so I could finally finish this sucker, but then I took a spring break trip to Denmark, and thus, now that I am finally back, I have posted.
To my dear, dear beta, T.O.S., you rock my socks like whoa! I'm so glad I found you!
Hopefully Chapter 6 will not take quite so long, as it is already buzzing around in my head, waiting to be let out.
Bleeding Romantics and the Nymphomaniacs Who Shag Them
Chapter 5
Three's a Crowd
By the end of Wednesday, Draco was exhausted. Between the sleep deprivation, being completely ignored, and Harry's constant debaucherous ambushes, he was physically and emotionally drained, practically ready to raise his white flag in surrender.
Draco wearily trudged down the corridor after a long dinner which he spent fending off Hermione's constant prodding and trying to get Harry's attention and headed down toward his rooms. The portrait that guarded his door, a willowy damsel captured by a dragon, stopped her struggling for a moment to appraise his weary appearance.
"Rough day, love?" she asked as Draco sighed and rubbed his eyes.
"You could say that. House Elf Porn." He had let Harry choose the password last time he changed it, a mistake he wouldn't make twice.
"Get some sleep, love, you look exhausted."
"Ten points to Gryffindor for stating the obvious," Draco drawled as he rolled his eyes. The damsel didn't seem to notice.
"Is your knight coming tonight? I missed him last night, but he was so sweet to come to you this morning." She smiled placidly, and Draco frowned. He didn't need a repeat of this morning's three a.m. booty call.
"He won't be coming tonight. Actually- I'm changing the password. The new password is going to be Draco Dormiens." Sleeping Dragon - Draco gave himself a mental pat on the back for being so witty in the face of exhaustion.
"Don't let Harry Potter in tonight, no matter what." The damsel waved away a puff of smoke from the dragon's nostrils and frowned.
"Did you have a spat with your love? Just remember, true love can overcome any obstacle."
Draco rolled his eyes. "No, we didn't have a spat, and he's not my-" he sighed. There was no point explaining his relationship to a love-addled two-dimensional piece of artwork.
"Just don't let him in. Good night." The portrait swung open and Draco entered his rooms and flopped unceremoniously on his plush bed. Harry was doing way too well at this game, better than Draco had expected. Yet, Draco couldn't just give in. He had to come up with a way to beat Harry at his own game, but he was so tired. No matter how hard he tried to think of a cunning plan, the only thing he could think of was just how heavy his eyelids were and just how soft his bed was and maybe if he just took a tiny nap…
O
He slept deeply and dreamt of kissing Harry languorously, of soft touches and whispered words on a green hillside with the sweet green smell of grass in his nose and the breeze ruffling his hair and a golden butterfly tickling the bottom of his foot. He tried to kick it away, but he could not. He faded into lucidity and tried to scratch the itch against his bedpost, but found he couldn't move his foot at all. Then he moved to reach down and realized his hands were stuck as well.
Oh Merlin, he thought frantically as he snapped back into consciousness, I'm paralyzed! I've been poisoned! I'm dying! Voldemort has captured me and made me his kinky sex slave! He thrashed his body, trying to regain the use of his limbs.
"Good Morning," a sing-songy voice that was far too cheerful for this early in the morning cooed from the foot of the bed. Draco's eyes snapped open. Voldemort might have almost been better than…
"You," he seethed as he beheld Harry standing at the end of his bed, grinning deviously.
"Sleep well, sunshine?" Harry ran a finger along the arch of Draco's foot, and Draco tried to squirm away, but found himself held fast by soft red ropes binding his hands and feet to the bedposts. Completely vulnerable to whatever Harry wished to do to him, with him, Draco felt a sudden rush of fear and arousal course through his skin.
Draco cursed sharply and vowed revenge on that stupid love-blind damsel. Oh yes, there will be mustaches and devil horns in the two-dimensional meddler's future, he though maniacally.
Harry ran a finger up the line of Draco's calf teasingly. Draco shivered and realized he was completely naked and Harry was still completely clothed. Harry bent down and slowly licked the inside edge of his knee cap, and Draco felt all of his remaining blood pool in his groin. Harry continued his slow, teasing pathway up Draco's leg, licking, sucking, touching everywhere and getting ever closer to the place Draco wanted so desperately for him to touch.
"Fuck, Potter," Draco hissed, squirming, seeking more contact, but Harry pulled back, stopping all contact completely. Draco's skin ached from the loss of Harry's tantalizing touch.
"You don't move unless I tell you to." It was a command, and Draco suppressed a moan and stilled his movements, his cock already achingly hard. This was a side of Harry he'd not seem before: demanding, forceful, dominant. This was a side of Harry that scared him and made him dizzy with the need to be shagged senseless.
Harry kneeled on the bed, careful not to touch any part of Draco's body, and leaned in close, breath ghosting over Draco's flushed cheek.
"You will come only when I tell you to, only on my command. If I let you come at all." Draco's hips bucked up involuntarily, seeking something- anything, but finding only air.
Harry caught Draco's earlobe between his teeth, nibbling and licking teasingly, barely grazing that spot behind his ear that made Draco curse and swallow Harry's name in a moan. He licked and nipped his way down Draco's jaw and Draco turned his head to kiss him, but Harry pulled back sharply.
"Please, Kiss me Harry, I need-" Harry pinched one of his nipples, hard, and Draco arched off the bed at the pleasure and pain of it, straining against his bonds.
"No."
Draco bit his lip as Harry lowered his head and captured one pink nipple in his mouth, first laving it with the flat of his tongue, then suckling it, then rolling it between his teeth. The sensations kept building in his groin, and Draco though this might be over before Harry ever touched him.
Draco bucked up against Harry, aching for something to rub against.
"Stop." Harry pushed Draco's hips down into the mattress so hard that Draco was sure he'd have finger-shaped marks the next day. Harry's voice, quiet but commanding, only made him even more aroused. Draco bit down on his lip at the agony and the ecstasy of it. He stilled his hips, and Harry went back to touching his body, fingers plucking a chorus of moans from his heated skin.
Draco simultaneously loved and despised the fact that just the touch of Harry's mouth and hands could turn him into a blithering puddle of goo. It was not dignified for a Malfoy to be reduced to an amorphous mass, but Draco didn't have enough mental faculties to be outraged right now. His back arched like a bow as Harry's tongue painted a hot, damp line around his navel, then dipped into it, thrusting in lightly.
"Oh God, Harry" he finally whined, his shaft aching and straining toward his belly, "Please." Harry sucked at the indentation in the cradle of his hip, drawing out a small purple mark, then looked up at Draco, mouth inches away from there.
"Please What?"
"Please- Please touch me!" Draco groaned as Harry moved closer so that the blonde could feel every hot breath.
"Where?"
"My- My-" he stuttered, quaking with desire, "Please."
"Tell me what you want, Draco."
Draco told him exactly what he wanted until his speech degenerated into a blabbled stream of yes and there and oh God and Harry and please and then he was crying out from the exquisite torture of it all, completely and utterly taken.
O
Harry pulled away as a thoroughly sated Draco melted into the mattress. He cast a cleaning charm and Draco shivered as a film of bubbles swept across his belly then disappeared.
"Kinky enough for you, Draco?" Harry said with a smirk as he stood and pulled on his robes and grabbed his invisibility cloak.
Draco grinned sleepily. "That was…" The smug Gryffindor headed towards the door and Draco realized he was still bound and naked.
"Hey! You forgot to untie me!"
Harry turned back and grinned evilly. "No, I didn't."
Draco made a noise of frustration as he struggled against his bonds. After a moment of futile thrashing, he stopped, resigned.
"Can't you at least let me put on some pants?" In what appeared to be a moment of weakness, Harry grabbed Draco's boxers from the floor and slipped them up onto his hips. Harry looked at him for a moment, head cocked, and then Draco watched as Harry's lips curled into a devious smile and he pulled out his wand.
"What are you-" Draco felt the boxers tighten as Harry cast a spell and he debated whether to even look down. Harry smirked, disappeared under his cloak, and slipped out the door before Draco could protest again.
Draco looked down at the undergarments Harry had transfigured and groaned. Very skimpy animal-print bikinis graced his slim hips.
"Why me?" Draco sighed. As much as he wanted to be spared the indignity of being seen by his housemates in this condition, he had to get to class soon And he had to use the loo.
"Crabbe! Goyle!"
O
Draco's hulking minions stopped laughing long enough to summon the rest of the Slytherin seventh-years, drowning out Draco's vehement protests and pleadings to untie him. By the time they picked themselves up off the floor stopped laughing and finished taking photos Draco had missed breakfast and had to go straight to Herbology.
Just his luck, they were studying Carnivorous Tiger Lilies, and every time Professor Sprout mentioned the word "Tiger," the Slytherins all dissolved into giggles.
Draco rolled his eyes and focused on keeping his fingers from becoming lunch for his peckish flower.
"Attention, Class," Professor Sprout announced, when the flowers had all been potted, "Now we will tie up the Tiger lilies to prevent them from lashing out against unsuspecting bystanders." Draco buried his head in his hands as the snickers erupted once more, interlaced with phrases like "Tie up the tiger!" and "They're not the only tigers getting tied up!" Draco's Carnivorous Tiger Lily caught hold of the side of his hand and bit down hard.
"Why me?" Draco sulked to no one in particular, as he wrestled away the man-eating flower and attempted to staunch the blood flow.
O
After a quick trip to get healed by Madam Pomfrey, Draco was late for his second class of the day: Defence Against the Dark Arts with the Gryffindors. Draco sat on the other side of the room from Harry, refusing to even look at him.
"Hey Drake," Pansy said from behind him, and Draco winced at the horrid nickname, "Is Potter upset with you for being such an animal?" She and Millicent Bulstrode broke into malicious giggles and Draco pulled out a piece of parchment, seething.
Ways To Get Back At Potter, he wrote furiously.
1. Castration.
Draco crossed that out. As effective as that would be, Harry's equipment was rather near and dear to his, uh, heart.
2. Murder his family.
No, You-Know-Who had cornered the market on that particular form of revenge against Harry, and besides, Draco doubted Harry would miss his muggle relatives much if they had an "accident."
3. Tell Dumbledore.
He almost laughed at that one. He could see it now: "Professor Dumbledore, Harry's been shagging me half to death!" "Ah, I've known about it all along. Good Luck, Mr. Malfoy! Sherbet Lemon?"
He wasn't getting very far with this plan of his. Perhaps, he mused, the combination of sleep-deprivation and the overabundance of sex was fogging up his capacity to come up with Cunning Plans.
"Six inches due on Friday on the use of shielding spells in Wizarding Duels," Professor Harmon announced at the end of her lecture. "Class Dismissed." Draco yawned and stuffed his parchment and quill back into his book bag. Harry stalked over as the last of the other students filed out of the classroom and slid next to him on the bench.
"I missed you at breakfast," he said, wearing the smirk he'd been wearing since this whole bet began. Draco grabbed his bag and rose without acknowledging him, but Harry pulled him back down.
"So, I was talking with JFF and-"
"JFF?" Draco said quizzically.
"Justin Finch-Fletchley," Harry said, and Draco glared daggers at him.
"I thought I told you to stay away from the Hufflepuffs."
Harry ignored him and continued. "Anyway, I was talking to Justin and I asked him if he's like to join our fun and he said- "
"Join our fun? Like a threesome?"
Harry waggled his eyebrows and leaned closer. "Well, yeah. Just think of it, me shagging you while Justin-"
"WHAT? No!" Draco pulled away from him in fury. "How could you even think of- That's just- oh God, a Hufflepuff? That's- that's- that's-" Draco shut his mouth. Stuttering in rage was not the sort of thing Malfoys did. They were much more prone to random acts of violence.
"Would you prefer someone else? I hear Professor Snape might be-"
"WHAT? AUGH! What is wrong with you? Snape's like my uncle! Ugh, I can't even think about it!" Draco had the urge to claw his own brain out for the appalling mental image he just got.
"A foursome with Blaise and Terry then?"
"AUGH!" Infuriated, Draco stood up and headed for the door.
"You're mine and mine alone, Harry. Malfoys don't share!"
O
Draco stormed blindly down the hallway, furious at Harry for even suggesting it, but even more furious that he knew he was bound to lose this bet. He did miss Harry's stupid, corny romantic side.
Something grabbed his arm and pulled him into a dark closet.
"Merlin's left arsecheek, Harry! I'm not exactly in the mood right now!" He heard a feminine voice say, Lumos and turned to find himself face to face with Hermione Granger.
"Don't tell me," he drawled acidly, "Harry offered you a threesome as well. Or is it a foursome with the Weasel?"
"What? No! I just-" Hermione stuttered, obviously flustered.
"Go on, Granger. I haven't got all day to listen to you sputter." Draco's patience, usually thin, had been stretched to the limit with the events of the past few days.
"I know you said yesterday you were tired and stressed, but something is just not right between Harry and you."
"I don't know what you're talking about," he said dryly.
"I'm not kidding, Draco! Harry's been ignoring you, you seem always mad at him -" Her eyes narrowed. "Did you cheat on him?"
"WHAT?" Hell hath no fury like a Malfoy scorned. "Me? Cheat on him? What makes you think I'm at fault? Typical Gryffindor, siding with your golden boy when I'm the one getting ignored and abused. I'm the victim here!" Hermione brought a hand to her mouth, eyes wide.
"Oh God. Did Harry cheat on you?"
"No! Well, I mean he did suggest- but no, he wouldn't do that."
Hermione breathed a sigh of relief. "Then why are you fighting?"
Draco looked down at his feet.
"Czwehatabed" He mumbled unintelligibly.
"What did you just say?"
"Because. We. Had. A. Bet."
"A bet?" Hermione raised an eyebrow, "What sort of bet makes two people treat each other like that?"
Draco sighed. "I told him that there was nothing wrong with a relationship based entirely on shagging and he's set on proving me wrong. So now, all we do is shag. All the time. And the rest of the time, he ignores me. He won't even kiss me."
Hermione smirked. "How very 'Pretty Woman' of him."
"What? I may be pretty, but I'm no woman! And neither is Harry- unless you count that one time when we-"
"Don't tell me, please. I prefer to be ignorant of the more… Sordid details of your relationship. Sorry, it's a muggle movie about a prostitute." Draco slumped down on a large tub of Gunther's Grandiloquent Grime-Be-Gone.
"You know, Draco, you could just give up. It's obvious you're not having any fun like this."
"Malfoys don't lose bets. It's unheard of."
Hermione rolled her eyes. "Yeah, well Malfoys also don't fall in love with Harry Potter."
"You too with this love business? Have you and that daft portrait been having secret meetings? It's a conspiracy, I swear! I don't- I mean, I don't think I- I mean I-" He raked a hand through his hair, "Even if I did, which I don't, Harry doesn't love me. We have a relationship, we shag, we terrorize Snape, but he wouldn't- He's not stupid enough to fall in love with me."
Hermione smiled warmly. "I think he's exactly that stupid. Harry's one of the most romantic people I know, and he's not the type to enter into a relationship and stay in it so long, and fight for it so hard if he's not in love. That boy's fallen hard for you, and that's why he's so determined to prove to you that your relationship's not just based on shagging. This bet is probably killing him."
"But- Why didn't he ever say anything?"
"Did it ever occur to you that he's probably just scared you won't say it back?" Draco stared at her in amazement. Harry loved him? They'd never said the words to each other, and Draco hadn't dared to imagine that Harry might love him, much less thought about loving him back.
"This bet is killing me too," he said finally, "But I can't let him win just yet. I have to turn the tables on him, get in a few jabs of my own before this is over. Malfoys don't surrender without a fight. Or at least a good bribe." Hermione's smile turned into that look she got when the wheels in her head were turning extra fast. Her eyes met his, glinting with something vaguely devious.
"So kill him with kindness," she said slowly.
Yes, Draco thought with a grin, That might just do the trick.
O
A/N: Draco's password, Draco Dormiens, was inspired by the Hogwarts motto: Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titillandos - Never Tickle a Sleeping Dragon. (Sound advice, if you ask me!)
Is it really sad that I'm such a review addict that I check back every few hours after I've posted a new chapter to see if there are new reviews? Send me love (or comments or criticisms or proposals etc…) and I might just post the next chapter a bit faster. It's a bit like being a junkie- the more crack one consumes, the more one wants to get more crack… heh.
Next chapter: Draco has a little fun of his own with Harry.