By Jodi Marie Johnston
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Forever Knight (though if I did, things would have turned out differently!), they are property of Sony/Tri-Star and I am merely borrowing them and promise to put them back relatively unscathed when finished with them. No copyright infringement is meant and I incur no financial gain by the posting of this story. It is merely for entertainment purposes only.
All other characters are my creative works.
Chapter Eight
Nick polished off three bottles of blood before going to bed. It was the worst wagon fall he had allowed himself to have in a long time. The headache would not go away. He remembered Bell standing there and a bright light, then she was dead. What had happened? Magic? Finally he fell asleep.
The sun was shining and Nick found himself in a garden of sorts. Bell was there. She was sitting on a picnic blanket waving him over. Nick walked over and sat down.
"Took you long enough." Bell said.
"You're dead."
Bell shrugged.
"I'll be back." She said mimicking the voice of the Terminator.
"Ha, ha."
"What is it you want to know Nick?"
"You're an angel right?"
Bell smiled but did not answer.
"Gabriel was an arch angel according to the Bible, and from what I gather he was possessing the mortal body of Anthony Santiago just as you possessed the body of Bell Nightshade. Why am I remembering all this now?"
"You're dreaming. Its neutral ground, network for the divine. No secrets can hide here."
"Why did he do what he did?"
"Gabriel was not ready to visit earth. A man called him there. This man would not let him go, they were very alike these two. Gabriel did not wish to go back to his previous existence, and I do not blame him, but he would also not look at other options."
"I don't understand."
"God is the Oneness of all things. Being an angel you are in and of that Oneness."
"That doesn't sound so bad."
"It is not bad, it just is not as addictive as life."
"What do you mean?"
"People want to feel, to know to sense themselves. Oneness does not permit the separation to do so. You are it. Man chose duality back in the garden so that they could feel and know more. It is a long story but in the end, Gabriel didn't want to leave, so much so that he was willing to make sure he would never die and at the same time he could not give up being who he was. He was, is the left hand of God but he forgot what that meant after buying into all the old ideas that humans cling to."
"You said he choose duality and that you chose other and I assume that is what allowed you to stay sane and also do all those things."
"Yes, I chose otherness, which is living absent duality but not life."
"How can you do that?"
"It is hard if you do not have the base I have and it would take to long to explain. But it boils down to not needing or using judgment. No longer having the knowledge of good and evil."
"But…" Nick started to say.
"Shhh." Bell said touching his lips. "You will learn all this in time if you hang around long enough."
"But what about you? Will you go back to being an angel in the Oneness?"
Bell smiled. "No. The body I shared, I chorded with. We were one being, no separation between us. I am given the same salvation as any human. My meaningful immortality."
"I don't understand."
"Vampires don't usually get it. Immortality is not known in the future, but in the past. By looking back on my past lives I can see I have always existed and I know I will continue to exist."
"Really?"
"Really. Besides it wouldn't be fun being stuck as the same person in the particular through out eternity. I like the idea of being able to recreate myself in infinite ways."
"I guess I can't do that."
"Of course you can, you're just scared to. Most people are. Humans have an innate fear of death that is rather silly. But hey it's their life." Bell got to her feet.
"You're leaving?"
"Yeah."
"Will I ever see you again?"
"Maybe but I doubt you will recognize me."
"Will I remember all this?"
"I doubt it, but it will be inside you in essence. When you're ready, you will remember."
"Who are you?"
"Guess." Bell said and pointed to the sky.
Nick woke up feeling better than he had in centuries. He had been dreaming. How long had it been since he had had a good dream? Most times it was nightmares and memories haunting him. He thought of Bell. The sorrow that had been in his heart was gone. Nick smiled. For some reason he just knew it was all right and for the first time in a long time he felt hope for life, for his life.