Chapter 7 – Sleep Tight

Her beautiful brown eyes stare at me without looking. Then she blinks a couple of times and keeps staring again.

I look at Joanne, she's fallen asleep on the other side of the bed, holding her mother's hand. I didn't dare to wake her up. She was so exhausted. I don't know how long we've been sitting here watching Abby carefully.

Then suddenly the door opens and one of the doctors comes into the room. "Dr. Carter?" he asks quiet since he noticed the sleeping girl. "Yes?"

"I'm sorry, I couldn't speak to you earlier, but we had to run some tests first," He starts as we walk out of the room, "When Nurse Johnson went to perform the daily check up she found Mrs. Lockhart having a seizure. She happened to pull a few tubes out, but luckily she didn't hurt herself and we managed to get everything back in order."

I nod staring out of the window, "What's her diagnosis?"

"Vegetative state," he answers as those words are running through my head. "I'm sorry."

When I enter Abby's room again Joanne is still sleeping. She cried for almost half an hour, because she didn't understand what was happening to her mother. We had to give her something to calm her down and she still doesn't understand why Abby doesn't react although her eyes are open.

I look at my watch. It's almost eight o'clock. Susan came upstairs hours ago to take Joanne home, but she refused to go. I volunteered to stay with her and to call Susan when she's ready to leave.

Joanne can't sleep there all night, so I go outside and start to dial Susan's number, but nobody's answering. Maybe it's better to take Joanne to my house, let her sleep there and Susan could get her in the morning. I call Susan again and leave a message on her answering machine.

I never thought that a sleeping tiny seven year old girl would be so heavy. I sigh after carrying Joanne downstairs and put her on the backseat of my car. She looks like an angel, cuddled up in my jacket and I try to drive as careful as possible so I do not wake her.

"Good night sweetie, sleep tight." I kiss her on her forehead as I tuck her into the big guestroom bed. She looks quite lost in it since she's so tiny.

Years Earlier

"Are you a mommy?" the little boy asks watching every step of Abby.

"No, honey, I don't have any kids," she answers laughing stroking his hair.

"That's a pity!"

I stand outside the room looking at those two. Abby is so sweet with kids, I really wonder why we never really spoke about that topic. She would be the perfect mother. I should really talk to her about it.

"Hello Jared!" I greet the boy as I enter the room, "How are you?"

"I'm okay," he answers cuddling his blanket. "Nurse Abby brought me some chocolate milk!"

"That's very kind of you!" I say smiling at her and she smiles back, "But I think it's time for sleeping, right Abby?"

"Yes and tomorrow you will be much better!" She puts the blanket over him and strokes over his cheek, "Sleep tight."

I can't get enough of it, imagining Abby tucking our child into bed, maybe singing a song, telling a story...

"You coming?" she shakes me out of my dream.

"Oh, right, I mean yes," I say a little bit confused.

"You're just too sweet, Carter!"

I really missed those moments. After she left I never had one of those sweet dreams again. It was too painful to imagine what could have been. I spend a few more minutes watching Joanne sleep and then make my way downstairs. As I enter the living room I see my answer machine blinking. It says that Susan called. I redial her number and it doesn't take long for her to answer

"Hello?"

"Hi, it's John, you called me?"

"Yes, I just wanted to thank you for taking her," she sounds relieved.

"Yeah, well I didn't want her to sleep there and I couldn't reach you."

"Yeah, I just was on my way back to the hospital. But when I arrived you already left. Anyway, thanks a lot. How is she now?"

"Better, she just needed some rest. I'm going to talk to her about it tomorrow. Should I take her to your house later on or will you pick her up?" I ask her, hoping that it doesn't sound as if I want Joanne to go.

"I'm going to pick her up at noon, is that ok?"

"Yeah, perfect." We both go into silence for quite a while. Not really knowing what to say.

"Oh, what I wanted to tell you," she breaks the silence. "They got Abby off the ventilator, she needed to improve a little bit but it's more than fine now!"

I can't believe what she's saying, "Really? That's just great!"

"Yeah." Susan doesn't seem that happy about it, "You know John, it isn't over. There's still a big chance that this will be the last big improvement!"

Her words hit me right in my face. I'm a doctor by myself. I know all this. But right now I don't want to hear it. I just want hope. "Okay, anyway. I'll see you tomorrow!" I cut the conversation off. After today I don't feel like arguing.

"See you then", Susan answers and I know that she knows what I'm thinking about .

I put the phone back on the table and slowly walk upstairs, hoping for just a little bit of sleep. Hoping for a little relief from all of this.

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Author's Note: Thanks again for the nice reviews :) Of course I wouldn't let her die... so soon. Nahh (: I wouldn't. Keep reading and let me know what you think!