The Pair of Hobbitses

Disclaimer: As far as I know I did not write Lord of the Rings. It seems I am not rolling in my grave or jumping in piles of money so it seems i have no affiliation whatsoever with anything Lord of the Rings like. These, although are my own words so I would appreciate it if you didn't 'borrow' them or 'steal' them. If you would like them u can ask.

I have written two poems in a row
about an elf with a bow,

And about a man with a sword
I hope they did not make you bored.

Now I've been asked to write again
about the boys, merry and pip-en

Merry is kinda short and cute
He has an arse i'd like to toot

But that would be kinda mean
I'd hide, so I would not be seen

Pippin is the comedian of the two
You know deep inside that it is true

But pairing up they are the best
It's good to have a Hobbit fest

In the movies they knock down
Sam and Frodo, and they frown

But who can stay mad at them for long
Your feeling would have to be very strong

They climb up trees, they run from orcs
They eat sausages with knives and forks

They live through all the movies, three
Which makes them very dear to me

Coz if they died i would be sad
And whoever killed them would make me mad

The rumours are false, no need to fear
Merry and Pippin are not queer

They both like girls, which is good for me
Any day they can 'climb my tree'

But until that happens i'll dare to dream
About a pair of hobbits, and whipped cream.

THE END