Chapter 5 - Bon Appetit

Shrek and Fiona walked into the crowded dinning room area. Shrek's family, and a few other close relatives were sitting or standing, talking to each other.

Tayer came forward and said out loud, "Everyone meet Shrek, our long lost brother!"

The room filled with the sound of clapping hands.

"We decided that this dinner was special, so we got out the best wine, and prepared the fattest animals to eat! The cooks will be ready to serve us anytime soon."

Everyone sat down around the large round table. Music was playing in the background, and wine was being served. The last time Shrek had wine was over 15 years ago, he took a small sip, he liked it.

"Mmmm, this is great stuff!"

Fiona took a sip of the wine, smiled at the glass, then chugged the entire glass down. Shrek, who was beside her, was stunned at what Fiona did.

"That glass of wine was supposed to last Fiona."

Fiona didn't pay attention to Shrek; she just waived the servant to fill her cup again.

The family sipped chatted while waiting for dinner. Shrek's mom was curious about her son's new life as a husband.

"So... when did you and Fiona take the plunge?"

"Well, ahhh... we didn't really plan for it, it kind of just happened." Shrek said nervously.

"That's nice. How long did you both date each other for?"

"We really didn't date, we got married..." Shrek sipped his wine, "...two days after meeting."

"Really, how sweet."

Shrek was surprised at Maria and Cearl calm, accepting attitude.

"As long as your happy my son."

Maria gave a toast to Shrek and Fiona,

"Were all happy you two got married."

Maria lifted her glass, the rest of the family followed.

"To Shrek, Fiona and to happy ever after!"

Shrek and Fiona looked at each other and gave a forced smile.

"To happy ever after, heh, heh. Say, you and dad must have had a better start to marriage than we did right?" Shrek asked.

"Not exactly, your dad and I met up at the Poison Apple and got hitched the next day. I remember it well, we were still drunk when we said the I-do's"

Maria chuckled at remembering her less than picturesque tie up with her husband.

A servant walked in from the kitchen and said, "Your feast is ready!"

Finally, Dinner! Servants poured out of the kitchen with large platters, bowls, and plates filled with food of all kinds. Shrek noticed a striking resemblance between the way the servants brought out the food here and at Far Far Away. Shrek didn't care about it this time, he was comfortable. As the food was laid out on the table, everyone started grabbing food for themselves. Fiona snatched a large drumstick from one of the many plates, and took a large bit out of it.

"Mmmmm, great food!" Fiona said with her mouth full.

Shrek nudged her in the side, and whispered to her that she was in front of his parents.

"Don't worry Shrek, we do it all the time!" Maria said with a full mouth.

Shrek was enjoying himself, and was happy being with friendly faces. This dinner would be one he would remember for the rest of his life.

Cearl, wanted to know more about Shrek and Fiona. He put his elbow on the table, held his glass of wine towards Shrek and said...

"So Shrek, did you have sex with Fiona yet?"

Shrek froze. The comfortable atmosphere he was in seemed to vanish. The rest of the room stared at him anticipating an answer. He whispered in Fiona's ear,

"This is sure awkward." Shrek looked at the rest of the family. "What should I say?"

Fiona didn't know what to say either. Yup, this would be a dinner to remember. Shrek turned his head towards the rest of the room and said slowly,

"NO."

Shrek's family gasped in shock at his answer. The room filled with murmuring voices. Shrek realizing that it was a bad answer quickly corrected himself to make everyone happy.

"I... I mean YES!"

The rest of the family murmured to each other again.

"You did, that's great! It's always nice to get the fireworks started early in marriage."

Shrek gave a superficial smile to please the crowd. A large bottle of wine rested on the table to Shrek's right. He grabbed it and poured a little into his glass, and sipped it.

Tayer decided to ask Shrek a few questions.

"Say Shrek, have you ever thought about raising a family... eventually?"

Shrek took the bottle of wine again and filled his glass to the top. He gulped about half of the wine down, and said,

"Me and Fiona aren't really planning on starting a family anytime soon. We want to..." Shrek looked at Fiona. "do things."

The rest of the family was confused.

"You know, travel, get out of the swamp for a while, those kind of things."

"That's nice son, you'll have a family soon enough."

Shrek was a little on edge as the dinner continued, not knowing when his parents would blurt out a question that would be awkward to answer.

The dinner continued late into the night. After several drinks and tough questions, Shrek relaxed and talked casually with they other ogres in the room.

The food was taken from the table, the music slowly died, and most of the ogres in the room disappeared into the night.

At the end, Shrek, Fiona and his parents were left behind.

"Were so glad you came back Shrek, the rest of the family is also happy to see you. I hope you have a fun time while your hear."

"Thanks mom, I know I will."

Shrek and Maria hugged each other.

"You know son, if you have anything you want, just give us a yell. We'll be there." Cearl said.

"Oh, that reminds me, I have a few things for you and Fiona to have."

Maria disappeared for a short time, then came back with a small box of items.

"Since you and Fiona have your own place to stay, I decided to give you a few items that you might like."

Maria set the box items on the dinner table, she first took out a couple of circular round discs that were metallic.

"Me and my husband like to watch movies late at night, when all the kids are a sleep." She handed one of discs over to Shrek. "This one's my favorite." Maria handed the rest to Shrek and said, "If you and Fiona try any of the stuff you saw on the film, please try to keep the noise down."

Shrek nodded his head pretending to understand. Shrek gave the metallic discs over to Fiona to carry. Maria got another item out, this time it was a few books.

"I always like to read these books if I get bored, has some helpful info in case the evening gets dull."

Maria gave the books to Shrek. She then sifted through the small box and lastly took out as small chest.

"When the time is right open the chest and eat a few of the objects inside, it will make you feel a little dizzy, but it will make all your senses ten times more powerful!"

Maria gave the chest to Shrek, and said.

"We'll see you in the morning, have a pleasurable night."

Maria and Cearl then left Shrek and Fiona. Shrek looked at Fiona and said,

"Well that went ok, didn't it?"

"Yeah, your parents are so sweet."

Shrek and Fiona then walked out of the house and headed for their room. Shrek took the metallic discs and looked at them.

"Movies?" Shrek asked. He shuffled the discs and looked at the titles. "'"Medieval Fantasies", "Bedroom Stories II", "Ogresses gone wild"?... What kind of movies are these?"

Fiona took the small stack and looked at them. She grinned and dimmed her eyes like she knew what they were and said,

"I've seen a number of these types of movie in my lifetime"

Shrek didn't know what she meant.

"The books we got are strange as well." Shrek said looking through one of the books.

Later on in the evening Shrek and Fiona lay in bed thinking about what happened earlier.

"What a day, meeting my parents, having dinner with them, and talking about my life."

Shrek yawned.

"Lets check out one of those movies."

Fiona eagerly took one out called "Ogresses gone wild" and slipped it into a black box, and turned it on. A beam of light came from a small hole from the box and went against the wall at the foot of the bed. The movie started.

"I wonder what mom and dad are planning for us tomorrow?" Shrek asked himself as he watched on.

The movie was poor quality, but since the picture was big, it didn't matter...

Shrek could not sleep. He tossed and turned, thinking about his family. Shrek felt that something was wrong. He then thought about his oldest brother Murdoc, he thought about him, but something was also not right about that too. Shrek decided to approach his parents for help.

Shrek knocked on his parent's door in the Main house. Maria and Cearl opened the door and said,

"Shrek?"

"Hi mom, dad... I need to talk."

"Anything you want, sweaty."

Shrek was about to say something, then hesitated and sighed in sadness.

Shrek's parents looked at each other for a moment, then Maria said in a concerned voice,

"What's wrong Shrek?"

"The last time we saw each other..."

Shrek hesitated again.

"Yes?"

Shrek paused, then said in a firm voice,

"I want to know what really happened 15 years ago."