Look, I know our relationship didn't work out the way you hoped. But why don't you just slash my tires like a normal ex-girlfriend and end all this fighting between us?" - Bard
BARD: ONE
I stood on the roof of Titans Tower, a cigarette between my lips, gazing from behind round, darkened lenses toward the south; towards the place I grew up. Towards Amber.
"It used to be peaceful up here." Raven said from behind me. She was floating a few feet above the gravel roof with her legs crossed, meditating. "And the air used to be cleaner." She added.
Exhaling smoke through my grinning teeth and flicking away ashes, I turned to her.
"You know you'd miss me if I wasn't here." I told her, taking another drag from my cigarette. "I'm your brother, after all."
"Half-brother," she muttered.
I frowned. She always made that distinction, for some reason.
"I reckon I'll leave you alone, then." I suggested slyly, heading towards the elevator that would take me back down into the tower. "I'll tell Superboy to come up and keep you company..."
"O-on second thought," my sister stammered cutely, though still as stoic as ever. "I'd rather have you here."
I grinned again, putting my cigarette back between my lips.
"Why thank ya," I told her, mockingly tipping my black cowboy hat in her direction.
"...That wasn't exactly a compliment." She droned.
I frowned...again.
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
The stylized tone of the Teen Titans came through the small speakers on my communicator and, out of the corner of my eye, I saw the brooch that held on my sister's hooded purple cloak blinking red. Quickly, barely noticing that Raven had come to stand by my side, I reached into my trench coat, pulled out my communicator and opened it up to see Robin's face.
"Titans, trouble!" He announced over the frequency, and I had deja-vu...for the fifth millionth time.
"What is it?" I asked.
"It's Killer Moth!" The Boy Wonder replied to us. "He causing a ruckus over in the Tech District. Get down there as soon as possible! Robin out."
Raven walked briskly over to the ledge of the roof and put one foot on it, ready to take to the air.
"Are you coming?" She asked me.
"You know I don't like heights. I'll take the steel horse instead."
My sister blinked at me.
"You're going to go all the way through the tower just so you can avoid flying?"
"..." I didn't have a good answer for her.
"Whatever," she said emotionlessly. She flew away, leaving me alone on the roof.
Not wasting any time, I ran over to the elevator and pressed the button to open the doors.
And nothing happened.
I tried over and over again, but the stupid elevator wouldn't work.
Shit!
The possibility of flying with the aid of my wind song came to me, but I quickly dismissed that idea. Instead, I found the staircase and ran down flight after flight after flight of stairs, taking them two steps at a time as the clanking of my cowboy boots filled my ears, stopping only briefly to go by my room and pick up my guitar. When I got to the very bottom of the tower to the garage, I hunched over with my guitar on my back and entertained myself for a moment by panting heavily, coughing and wheezing.
God, I've got to quit smoking.
Finally, I stood up straight with some of my stamina replenished and straddled my Harley. I took one last drag from the cigarette I had forgotten was in my hand and threw it away, happy that no one had caught me with it inside the tower; that was a big no-no in Robin's book, and I certainly didn't want to piss off the Boy Wonder. Setting those thoughts aside, I pushed back the bike stand with heel of my boot and kick started the engine.
VRRRRROOOOOOM!
Time to take Killer Moth to the woodshed...
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When I arrived on the scene, Killer Moth, a mad scientist dressed in a metal moth suit, was jumping up and down on a red sports car.
I frowned at him as I parked and got off my Harley. This wasn't really his style. Most of the time, he liked to strike from the shadows and let his mutated moths do the dirty work. Or...
"Titans!" Robin rallied us, twirling his staff over his head. "Go!"
Robin tried to strike at Killer Moth first, but Superboy was faster. His black, red and blue form swooped down at the villain. But Killer Moth spun out of the way, pivoted and sent the Boy of Steel head first into a brick building wall. I winced, but at the same time, something didn't feel quite right. I looked around, even as I heard assorted war cries from my friends...and that's when I saw him. I jumped back on my Harley, started it up and zoomed off.
"Dude!" I barely heard Beast Boy yell at me from over the roaring engine. "Where are you going?"
But I didn't have time to answer him. Killer Moth was just a ripple in the pond and the big fish that hid in the darkness beyond him...was Fang.
He didn't notice me at first, so I just trailed along behind him as he climbed and jumped from building side to building side. But I knew the loud motor of my bike wasn't going to escape from his attention for long. When the mutated half-spider/half-man finally saw me, he snarled and doubled his speed. Gritting my teeth, I pulled back on the accelerator and zoomed after him all the faster. Keeping one hand firmly on the handle bars to keep the bike steady, I used my other to reach in to my trench coat and pull out the laser pistol that I had 'acquired' from Kitten way back when. I took careful aim at Fang's scampering figure and-
ZAP!
The red laser blast barely missed him, blowing a small, concrete chunk out of the building face he had been climbing. Cursing under my breath, I aimed and tried again.
ZAP!
I missed low this time.
ZAP!
I missed again. I decided to try a different approach. I put away my laser pistol and sang under my breath.
# And there's nothing cold as ashes, after the fire is gone!#
A flaming orange fireball appeared in my palm. Wrenching back my arm, I tossed it at the spider.
PHOOSH!
The fireball barely grazed one of his spider legs, but it didn't slow him down in the slightest. Though it pissed me off to no end, I knew he was too far away and my aiming foundation was too unsteady to get off a good shot, or fireball, at him. But the question I had to answer now was: How else was I gonna stop him?
But then, up ahead on the sidewalk, I saw a bald man walking out of a tool store holding something under his arm.
Bingo!
I aimed my Harley at the curb he was standing on. I reached out my hand and-
SWOOSH!
"-Sorry!"
and snatched away what he had been carrying: A coil of rope.
Taking an insane chance, I leaned back and steered my big Harley with my knees. With my hands free, I started tying a lariat loop in the rope. I briefly looked up and saw a stalled car in the middle of the street.
Shit!
I fumbled for the handle bars and turned hard to the left. I missed the car, but my knee smashed painfully into the side mirror, ripping it off. After that, I started saying a quick prayer because I was about to pull a Robin; an insane stunt. Finally, I finished the knot and started twirling the hastily made lasso over my head. Humming the wind song and pulling my front wheel up into a wheelie, I hit the boosters, catapulted up off the back of a parked car and went airborne. At the height of my jump, I threw the lasso at Fang. The rope looped over the spider abdomen of Fang and tightened...and I was jerked through the air on off my bike. Just before my Harley hit the ground, blue rocket boosters emerged from it's bottom and safely guided it to the ground.
Note to Self: Thank Cyborg for customizing my bike again.
I didn't have much time to be thankful, however, since Fang was taking me for one hell of a bronco ride.
Don't look down, Jonny. Don't look down!
I looked down.
Gritting my teeth all the harder, I half shut my eyes and gripped the rope as tight as I could. Fang jumped across the street below us time and time again, sending me bouncing into glass and trying to run sideways over concrete and brick as I exerted all my energy into holding on to my end of the rope. Finally, Fang made a mistake. He clamored around the corner of a building onto another street, which sent me arcing out...and then back in.
WHAM!
I planted the heels of both of my cowboy boots right between the freak's mandibles. We found ourselves tumbling towards the hard concrete, a mass of boots and arachnid legs and flapping arms. At the last second, I was able to hum the wind song and stop my descent. Fang wasn't so lucky.
SMASH!
Fang crashed into the cab of a pickup truck, totally destroying the vehicle and raining glass out on the street. I winced at the thought of some poor guy coming out of a store and finding his truck in this condition.
Amazingly, Fang moved. He shuddered and, ever so slowly, he pushed himself up out of the wreckage with his arachnid legs. He stuttered left, then to the right, and then his eyes locked into mine. He held up his human fists defiantly and-
"Ugggghhh..."
fell forward, unconscious.
I sweat dropped.
After a moment, I thankfully set my boots on the ground again and reached into my trench coat for my communicator.
"Bard," Robin face said to me. "Where did you go?"
"I caught Fang taking a stroll." I replied. "He's down here on Williams Street. Think you can pick him up for me?"
"Why can't you do it?"
I swallowed.
"I-I have someone I have to see."
Robin stared piercingly at me from behind his mask, as if he were looking right at my soul. Finally, he nodded.
"All right, Bard. I'll send Beast Boy down to take him away."
"Aw, man!" I heard Beast Boy complain in the background.
"Thanks,"
"Good job, Bard. Robin out."
Sighing, I closed the communicator and put it back in my coat. Checking Fang one last time, I headed back towards where my Harley was waiting for me. I had someone to see. Today...
Today was the day I had first met Tim.
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I stood before my bike in front of the sanitarium, nervously smoking another cigarette. Three smoldering butts lay on the ground by my Harley's back tire. To tell the God's honest truth...I was scared. Not of the huge, white washed building in front of me, but of what waited within; of who waited within.
What seemed like an eternity ago, Tim had been my best friend. But that had been before Slade got a hold to him. Tim had always been a big man, anyway, but Slade took it to extremes. He injected him with the Bane Serum. The serum doubled, even tripled the size of Tim's muscle's, but there was a deadly side effect: It drastically raised his aggression. Finally, after an extremely high dose, it finally took it's toll on him mind: Tim snapped. He was reduced to a slavering monster whose only thought was blood...usually mine.
I saw the full extent of his madness when Raven and I went into his mind in a vain attempt to cure him. In his insane state, I saw him imagining killing me...bloodily. And the illusion he conjured up with Amber...
Shuddering, I took another long drag from my cigarette, using it as an emotional crutch. I didn't think I could do this. I had tried only once before, and I had wimped out at the last second. I wasn't afraid of him attacking me. What scared me was those green eyes of his that I knew would be filled with rage and insanity. Eyes...eyes that didn't belong to my friend anymore; eyes that only wanted to see me dead and turn red with my blood...
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
Damn near thankful, I reached into my coat and pulled out my communicator. When I opened it, Robin's face was on the small screen.
"Bard, I need your help."
I blinked. I was surprised he hadn't said 'Titans, trouble!'
"What do you need?"
"I need you to go down to Star Labs and investigate a disturbance that happen there not too long ago."
"Star Labs?" I echoed. "Why don't you send Cyborg down there? I don't really know-"
"I can't." The Boy Wonder cut me off. "Crimson Wolf is being transferred to a federal prison today and Commissioner Walker wants us to be there. Just find out what you can. Robin out."
I had objected a bit, to be sure, but in truth, I was glad. Having to go down to Star Labs gave me a valid excuse not to enter the sanitarium...or face the eyes within it.
"Another day, Tim." I whispered under my breath as I threw away my cigarette and climbed back on my Harley. "Another day."
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Robin leaned against the brick wall in the grassless yard of the city's prison. His gloved arms were crossed tightly across his chest, his jaw was clenched and the slits of his eye mask were narrowed. He was the epiphany of tenseness and concentration.
Starfire floated over and peered hesitantly at him, her emerald eyes tinged with concern.
"Friend Robin, do you feel the distress?"
"No," the Boy Wonder answered, rolling his neck to loosen it up. "I'm more worried than anything. Crimson Wolf is dangerous, merciless and, worst of all, extremely smart. I have a dark feeling that he'll try to escape."
Starfire cocked her head to the side.
"But that is why we are present, correct?"
"Right," Robin nodded. "But we have to be ready for anything. We...the city...can't afford for us to make any mistakes."
"Understood!" Starfire floated a bit and raised a hand. "Should the Crimson Wolf attempt to escape, he will be met by my fiery green Tamaranian fury!"
Robin allowed himself a small smile before the intense determination ruled his face once again.
Not far away, Superboy was smirking at them.
"Is it just me?" He asked. "Or are they connected at the hip?"
"You'll get used to it." Cyborg shrugged his titanium shoulders. "One of these days they're actually gonna kiss and hell will freeze over."
"Don't count on it..." Raven droned from behind him.
"What? Robin and Starfire kissing?"
"...No,"
"...Oh," Cyborg paused. "It was a figure of speech!" The robot protested.
"..."
Suddenly, Beast Boy grinned mischievously and elbowed Superboy suggestively in the ribs. After rubbing his skinny, bruised elbow, he said:
"Forget about Starfire, dude. Raven's still single!" The green changeling waggled his eyebrows.
Raven's eyes flashed.
"...I'd rather die first."
Cyborg winked his human eye at the Boy of Steel.
"Better hope Bard's wrong about the after life and that you're reincarnated, dawg!"
Superboy thought about that.
"Bard kinda weird, isn't he?"
Beast Boy looked at him and scratched his dark green hair.
"Um...I think we're all pretty weird, dude..."
"That's not what I meant, man." Superboy shook his head. "I mean, he just doesn't seem like the type to be a bible thumper. You've seen the way he fights! He stomps on toes, pokes people in the eyes, kicks people right in the-" He stopped and glanced nervously over at where Robin was standing. "Right below the belt. He smokes a ton of cigarettes a day and I have never, ever seen him wear a helmet when he rides that Harley of his."
Cyborg blinked.
"That is kinda weird..."
"You don't understand." Raven told them. "The bible's overall message isn't that if you do bad things you'll be punished. All men sin. It is inevitable. The important thing is to accept God into your life and help him lead you...or something along those lines."
All three boys stared at the dark sorceress.
"You read the bible?" They all asked her at the same time.
Raven cleared her throat.
"It's the oldest book ever written." She explained. "I consider it a slightly fictious history book. Nothing more." Suddenly, she winced and turned away.
"What's wrong, babe?" Superboy asked her.
"I-I thought I felt something." The girl took in a deep breath. "But...it was nothing... Come, we have to be ready for Crimson Wolf."
Superboy looked at the sorceress as she walked away. He knew something was wrong with her...or she knew something she didn't want to reveal. How did he know? Simple: She hadn't zapped the crap out of him when he called her 'babe'.
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When I pulled my Harley up to the Jump City Division of Star Labs, an attractive, red haired woman was outside waiting for me. She was dressed conservatively, I saw, and I figured she was a secretary or a lab assistant. I also saw the glassy look in her blue eyes, a look I quickly identified as someone's who had been through some kind of trauma.
"A-are you a Titan?" She asked me when I walked up to her.
"Yes, ma'am." I brought two fingers up to the brim of my cowboy hat in greeting. "I'm Bard, the new one. And you are..."
"Lisa," she answered, and I gently shook her hand.
"Now, do you want to tell me what happened today?"
The woman took in a deep, shuddering breath and nodded.
"A-at first, I thought the computer console was just short circuiting out again. Ray isn't very good at computers, so it happens pretty frequently. Can you believe he actually had trouble getting an accurate reading on an atomic chronometer?"
I stared at her blankly. I had absolutely no idea what she was talking about. This was one of the main reasons I had suggested to Robin that Cyborg come here instead of me. I had no knowledge whatsoever about technology.
"Anyway," the girl continued. "Just as I was walking by, he starts to shout. Something about neighboring universes or something. Ray might be bad at computers, but he's a genius, and most of what he says goes over my head."
I nodded, waiting for her to go on.
"Well, he's talking to somebody through some kind of radio and they start talking about me! What I look like and all. When I heard that, I snatched the mike from Ray and started berating him and the other person on the line for being, um, perverts." She actually blushed at me.
"But once I started talking," Lisa went on. "I started talking to myself."
I cocked my head to the side. Surely I couldn't have heard that right...
"What?"
"I know it sounds crazy, but it's true! I was talking over the microphone and, at the same time, another me was talking right back at me!"
"You sure it wasn't an echo or something?"
"No," she shook her head emphatically. "We were saying different things at the same time. And she knew something about me that only I would know!"
I looked at her curiously.
"What did she know?"
"Um," she bit her lip. "I-I have a tattoo."
I quickly scanned her exposed skin with my eyes.
"I don't see any-"
"Just because you don't see it doesn't mean it's not there."
"...Oh..." It was my turn to blush.
For the sole purpose of changing the subject, I imagine, she asked:
"Why do you always take your guitar with you?"
Unconsciously, I looked over my shoulder at it's head where the acoustic instrument was draped diagonally down my back.
"It comes in handy sometimes." I shrugged. "Do you mind showing me the machine he was using?"
"O-Of course!" She nodded quickly. "This way."
I took off my hat and followed her inside. The place was mostly deserted. At least, it was in the computer area she lead me into. There were four or five other scientists there, and I reckoned that they were there for the same reason as me.
"This is it." Lisa told me, pointing.
I'd never seen a machine like it. Of course, with my limited perspective into the technology world, it wasn't a surprise. Sure, I had a laser pistol, but all I knew about it was that if you pointed it at someone and pulled the trigger, bad stuff would happen to them.
The monitor was larger than your usual home computer, and the CPU reached up to my chest and was about as wide as my arms would reach. There was a standard keyboard to it, and a radio hanging by a chord that looked suspiciously like a souped up walkie talkie.
"All right," I said then. "What happened?"
"Like I said, Ray was talking to the other Lisa and someone else, babbling on and on about a breakthrough of some kind. Then, all of sudden, there was some kind of disturbance on their side of the line."
"Disturbance?"
"It sounded like...like someone was attacking them. And that's when Ray disappeared."
"Disappeared?"
"You sure are good at repeating things."
I blinked.
"But yeah, he disappeared in a flash of light." Lisa explained to me.
The mystic teleporter, Zillah came immediately into my mind, but that didn't fit. She had left the city just a couple of days ago. What would she want with a scientist at Star Labs, anyway? And, if my memory served, things she teleported didn't flash.
"Look," I told her honestly. "I'm out of my depth here. I know nothing about technology and-"
"Hey, what's this?" She bent over and fumbled beneath the desk the machine rested on. Her conservative jacket rose some, and her skirt descended just a bit. I saw the very edge of a picture inked into her skin.
So that's where the tattoo is...
I blushed and looked away as she stood back up.
"What is it?"
"I don't know," she answered, twirling the metal, cylindrical object in her hands. "It looks like a cannister of some kind."
She handed it to me, but I couldn't discern anything from it.
"I'll take this back to the tower and let Robin and Cyborg look it over." I suggested to her. "Are you gonna be okay?"
Lisa took in a deep, shuddering breath.
"I-I think so." She answered me with a nod. "I just need to go home and get some rest."
"Did you want a ride?"
She looked at me funny.
"I'm not trying to pick you up." I defended myself, raising my hands unconsciously. "Just tryin' to be a gentleman..."
"...Oh,"
She almost sounded...disappointed.
When we were outside, she took one look at my bike and said:
"You're taking me home on a motorcycle?"
I blinked.
"What did you think I drove around in? 'The Bardmobile'?"
"Well, what's this?" She pointed at my bike. "'The Bard-Cycle'?"
I sweat dropped.
"I just call it my Harley and leave it at that."
I straddled the motorcycle and turned back to Lisa, offering a hand. She hesitated for a moment, but then she took it and sat down behind me.
"Aren't we supposed to be wearing helmets?" She asked me.
I ignored her...But I did keep an eye open for cops.
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Slade sat on his makeshift throne in the middle of the large, dark room. His masked head was bowed, and his single visible eye was narrowed as if he were deep in thought. At each side of him, Jinx and Kitten kneeled submissively. Suddenly, the room was lit up at the huge monitor opposite them lit up to show Professor Chang's wrinkled, ugly face.
"You are beginning to irritate me, Chang." Slade delivered the only slightly veiled threat coldly. "I have already told you: You'll have no more funding until you provide me with some useful results."
"It's not that." Chang said, but then he paused thoughtfully. "Although I could use more money to work on-"
The insane inventor stopped immeidatly when Slade stood up and slammed his fist down on the arm rest of his chair.
"Enough! Tell me something useful, Chang, before I decided that you are...expendable."
Professor Chang gulped audibly.
"I-I just wanted to tell you that my sensors are picking up chronoton distortions here in the city..."
"Is that so?" Slade said, his voice ambitiously interested. "Very good, Chang. Perhaps you're more useful than I had previously thought."
Chang's face brightened noticeably.
"I can send you a program to track down the distortions." He said brightly.
"Do that." Slade ordered him. "Perhaps, if what you say is true, you'll deserve to have all the research money you'll ever need."
Chang revealed his misshapen teeth with a grin and, somehow he knew, that Slade was grinning as well beneath his mask.
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As I walked down the steps out of the old brownstone building from taking Lisa up to her apartment, I stopped. I reckon I could have stopped for all sorts of reasons. Maybe I'd left the cannister Lisa found at Star Labs in her apartment. Maybe I wanted to smoke a cigarette. Or maybe even just because of a sudden, bad itch... But, unfortunately, (except for maybe that last one), none of those reasons were true.
I had stopped because I was looking down the barrel of a really big laser rifle.
Kitten was sitting on my Harley, pointing the huge weapon at me. She wore a red bandanna to hold back her blonde hair and wore the same dark, loose fitting fighting clothes as always. She had come a long way from simply being Killer Moth's annoying daughter.
"Hand it over." She grated at me.
I groaned. But I wasn't sure whether she meant the canister or the laser pistol I had stolen from her so long ago.
"Look, I know our relationship didn't work out the way you hoped." I said. "But why don't you just slash my tires like a normal ex-girlfriend and end all this fighting between us?"
Without saying a word, I saw Kitten tense her finger around the trigger of the rifle and a faint, pink light building up inside the barrel.
Wrong answer!
ZAP!
I just barely dove out of the way, but that didn't mean I was out of the woods yet.
ZAP! ZAP! ZAP! ZAP!
Though I was nowhere near as acrobatic as Robin, that didn't mean I couldn't dodge. I jumped over one shot, ducked another and dove for the only cover available: The back of a pickup truck. But before I could reach into my coat to grab my laser pistol and return fire, a dozen or so strong hands appeared out of nowhere, grabbed me by my black trench coat and yanked me out. I was being dragged forward towards Kitten by my arms when I finally saw who had me: Six or so of Slade's robots. But that wasn't the first thing I noticed. No, the first thing I noticed that was my cowboy hat had fallen off my head.
Oh, hell no...
I jumped and leaned back, letting my two draggers hold me up as I kicked two of the robots in the face with my cowboy boots. When I was back on the ground, I forced my arms together with a strained grunt, making my two draggers klonk heads. There were two more left. I pivoted my acoustic, wooden guitar around to my front and picked a quick melody, causing two blue streaks of electricity to arc at them. They smoked and convulsed and went down for the count.
Suddenly remembering Kitten, I repositioned my guitar, tore my laser pistol from my coat and turned to her...but she was gone. Cursing under my breath, I walked back to the pickup truck, got my hat and put it back on my head. Then, I quickly got on my bike. Though I wasn't sure, I had a feeling Kitten had been after the canister. And if she wanted it, it really meant that Slade wanted it. But even if that wasn't the case, I still needed to figure out what the hell it was.
Lighting a cigarette, I started up my Harley and headed back towards Titans Tower. I'd already had enough 'superheroing' for one day, and it wasn't even noon yet.