Chapter 9
The Only Son
Durc looked down in consternation at his spear. He had been working on a new one, but he knew he couldn't carve animals again. The men had been uncomfortable around it and he knew some blamed the spear on the last unsuccessful hunt.
To Durc, carving had been something he had to do. The images in his head had been itching to come out. The bison, gray wolf, a mammoth, a porcupine, and strongest of all, the cave lion. He had been disturbed at his memories of these animals. Instinctively, he knew that the other men did not have the memories of these animals like he did.
He was different, and he didn't like it. His features stood out against the normal clan looks. Secretly, he was glad that Broud was not around to call him 'Deformed One' anymore. All he wanted to do was to fit in with the rest of the Clan and have normal memories. Durc's thoughts turned to the woman he would meet next summer. Uba said that she is like me, but does she think like me also? Can she make sounds and bare her teeth when she is happy?
His thoughts inevitably turned to mama. She had played sound games and laughed. His heart had felt better with mother, and free. Clan life was confining and he often had to be careful about making too many sounds or smiling.
Durc could remember the day mama left. The former leader had cursed her because she stood up for the mog-ur. In his eyes, she had done nothing wrong. She also had not acted like a dead person. How could she talk to him and the others if she was a spirit? If I could see her and touch her, then why wasn't she real? A spirit didn't need mog-ur's tent or my cloak or a supply of food. But if she wasn't dead, then why did she leave me with Uba? Why didn't she take me with her? His thoughts turned over a well-worn track in his mind. He would never understand everything about his mama.
"Durc, we hunt again in the morning. Will the new spear be ready?"
He looked up at Brun who was acting as interim leader. "Yes, I am almost done," he signed.
Brun nodded and left. Durc wondered again when a new leader would be named. He thought about each man, but none seemed to have the right qualities. Too bad Brun was old and Brac was too young. He looked up and saw Uba coming out of the cave with a basket with other women. No doubt she was going out to gather herbs. He walked over and offered to go with her.
Uba looked up at her son and smiled. She hadn't wanted to go out alone, especially if that cave lion was still around. As Durc grabbed his old spear, the carved one, she frowned. Was it bad to have carvings on a weapon? She decided to ignore it for now and begin to search for the plants she needed.
"What is this herb for again?"
No matter how many times Durc asked, Uba was still surprised. No other man had ever asked her about plants she gathered. None of them other than her son ever gathered them. They didn't have the memories. He is like his mother, she thought to herself. Perhaps with the Others they pass down their gifts to both sons and daughters. I wish that she was still alive to see how Durc has grown.
"That one is for aching joints, I use it for Vorn." She had told him a couple of times before. He didn't have the memories of healing, but he could remember what he wasn't born with. She often worried about the future of her different thinking son.
"Uba, will you watch Ayla for a while?" Ona asked.
She smiled at the girl and took little Ayla who was wrapped in a carrying cloak. Swift hands secured the toddler to her hip. For some reason, having her sister's namesake nearby brought her comfort. Ona left with a couple of the other women who were picking berries a few yards away. She had not yet mastered carrying the basket, picking berries and keeping eager hands out of the way.
"Uba, what was the first Ayla like?"
Uba rocked back on heels in shock. He had never asked before about his birth mother. What could she say? She wasn't supposed to speak of the dead. But he did ask a direct question.
"She was different, mother said she was a medicine woman of the highest line, though she was born to the Others."
"Was she really an Other? Why would the Clan take her in?"
"Two earthquakes ago, the Clan had been traveling to find a cave. Mother found her lying on the ground near death. Brun told her to leave her, but she pleaded to take the child and care for her. Iza was a healer, and couldn't let any creature suffer if she could help. Your mother was the same way."
"Uba," he paused, searching for the words," did mama fit in with the Clan? Was it ever hard for her?"
She looked tenderly at her son, knowing his concern was not just for his mother. "She was tested many times. Her totem was not an easy one to live with. But she was named 'Woman Who Hunts' and was rewarded for her trials." Uba's voice became soft as she remembered her sister. "The Others must live a lot differently than us. She often was insolent to Br, er, our former leader. But she was a good daughter and the man of our hearth loved her as no other."
"She must have had a powerful totem," Durc said, "I heard a rumor once, that she had been cursed many times. Is that true?"
Uba felt goose bumps rise on her flesh and look around. Too much speaking of the dead might draw bad spirits to you. "Yes, the first time was when it was discovered she had been practicing with the sling. She was cursed with one moon's passing. The second time was right after you were born for a few days. And the last time was when she gave you to me."
Durc knew that his mother was uneasy, but he wanted answers. He tried to approach the situation with more tact. "You said she was cursed about the time I was born. Did that have anything to do with me??"
Uba looked up and nodded. He should know how precarious his first days had been. "We thought you were born deformed. Your mother did not want to dispose of you, so she ran away to a cave. Brun was very angry and would've lost face if he were forced to give in to a woman. Before the day that you had to be accepted, she returned and begged for your life. The mog-ur named you after her favorite legend, 'The Legend of Durc."
He shivered. That had always been his favorite story, not just because his name was in it. How much alike was he to his mama?
"I am glad she was wise and that I am here." He stopped motioning, allowing Uba to return to gathering. Durc knew that he had pushed the limits of acceptable conversation. But he was elated; each bit of information about his mama was as sweet as honey.
Thonolan watched the young man carefully. According to the relationships of his people, Durc was related to him. In some ways he reminded him of Ayla, strong, wise and gifted. Other times he seemed fully clan and seemed like a stranger. The Mother wanted Durc woven into a great purpose. What was this purpose that he had with the Clan?
The wind whispered through the trees and followed an invisible trail in the grass. Rising up, it blew across his ears. "He is the only son of the clan."
oooooooooo
Winter came early and had taken the clan by surprise. Many were not yet ready for the cold season and were ill prepared to last the winter in comfort. Brun felt the heaviness of leadership and dreaded winter for the first time. Always he had prepared the clan well in advance, but he had taken up leadership when the leaves had already started to turn. How many people would starve or die this winter? He worried about the older members, and he worried about the young. If only they didn't have so many to feed.
Surveying the clusters of hearths, he again thought of who should be the next leader. Brac would be the logical choice now that he was a man, but he was young. He did not want to repeat the same mistake that he had done with the son of his hearth. Durc was strong and able, the Gray Wolf was a good totem for him. But could he learn to lead? After all, he is Her son. She would have been a good leader if she had been a man. He again weighed each member of the clan and again found them wanting. His choice would be either Brac or Durc. Though they were young, the need for a leader was greater. Brun doubted that he would last the winter himself. As leader would make sure there was food at every hearth before he would eat. He was getting older too. Though Uba gave him poultices and medicines, he still felt his age.
Goov approached the leader, his thoughts along the same vain. Nodding, they headed to the back of the cave where Goov could convene with the spirits.
"I think it will be either Brac or Durc. Each have strong and weak points."
Goov nodded, "I will ask the spirits what they want." He began with the formal ancient language as he called the spirits together.
Thonolan felt an eerie sensation and shivered. The clan spirits were gathering around them, and he wasn't sure what his purpose was. He felt uncomfortable around the foreign spirits, yet at the same time he felt at home.
"This insignificant mog-ur has one request," Goov began motioning, "he would ask that the spirits help the clan make a choice. Our leader is no longer, and we need a new permanent one. This man would ask the spirits who the next leader should be." He continued his motions and then stopped. The datura he had drunk earlier was beginning to take affect. Slowly, Goov felt himself lose control over his body and sank to the floor.
The spirits looked at each other with wise eyes. Ursus turned to Thonolan, "it is your responsibility to show him."
"Me?" He gasped, "why would you need me to do this? I don't know what should be done."
"You do know. Search your memories. The Mother has given you the responsibility to weave the threads." Ursus sat back and looked at him expectantly.
Thonolan looked at them helplessly. Thinking back to when Creb was with him, he approached Goov's unconscious form. Kneeling beside him, he put his hand in his head and accessed his thoughts. Goov was traveling in a murky loamy place when Thonolan contacted him. He went through the mog-ur's memories of both men. But he still didn't know which one to guide him to.
From somewhere, a breeze blew and caressed him. "Weave the threads. You've seen what must be."
Suddenly, he recalled what had been revealed to him of the future. The choice was clear. Slowly, he guided the mog-ur's thoughts and showed him who would be the future leader.
Durc looked down in consternation at his spear. He had been working on a new one, but he knew he couldn't carve animals again. The men had been uncomfortable around it and he knew some blamed the spear on the last unsuccessful hunt.
To Durc, carving had been something he had to do. The images in his head had been itching to come out. The bison, gray wolf, a mammoth, a porcupine, and strongest of all, the cave lion. He had been disturbed at his memories of these animals. Instinctively, he knew that the other men did not have the memories of these animals like he did.
He was different, and he didn't like it. His features stood out against the normal clan looks. Secretly, he was glad that Broud was not around to call him 'Deformed One' anymore. All he wanted to do was to fit in with the rest of the Clan and have normal memories. Durc's thoughts turned to the woman he would meet next summer. Uba said that she is like me, but does she think like me also? Can she make sounds and bare her teeth when she is happy?
His thoughts inevitably turned to mama. She had played sound games and laughed. His heart had felt better with mother, and free. Clan life was confining and he often had to be careful about making too many sounds or smiling.
Durc could remember the day mama left. The former leader had cursed her because she stood up for the mog-ur. In his eyes, she had done nothing wrong. She also had not acted like a dead person. How could she talk to him and the others if she was a spirit? If I could see her and touch her, then why wasn't she real? A spirit didn't need mog-ur's tent or my cloak or a supply of food. But if she wasn't dead, then why did she leave me with Uba? Why didn't she take me with her? His thoughts turned over a well-worn track in his mind. He would never understand everything about his mama.
"Durc, we hunt again in the morning. Will the new spear be ready?"
He looked up at Brun who was acting as interim leader. "Yes, I am almost done," he signed.
Brun nodded and left. Durc wondered again when a new leader would be named. He thought about each man, but none seemed to have the right qualities. Too bad Brun was old and Brac was too young. He looked up and saw Uba coming out of the cave with a basket with other women. No doubt she was going out to gather herbs. He walked over and offered to go with her.
Uba looked up at her son and smiled. She hadn't wanted to go out alone, especially if that cave lion was still around. As Durc grabbed his old spear, the carved one, she frowned. Was it bad to have carvings on a weapon? She decided to ignore it for now and begin to search for the plants she needed.
"What is this herb for again?"
No matter how many times Durc asked, Uba was still surprised. No other man had ever asked her about plants she gathered. None of them other than her son ever gathered them. They didn't have the memories. He is like his mother, she thought to herself. Perhaps with the Others they pass down their gifts to both sons and daughters. I wish that she was still alive to see how Durc has grown.
"That one is for aching joints, I use it for Vorn." She had told him a couple of times before. He didn't have the memories of healing, but he could remember what he wasn't born with. She often worried about the future of her different thinking son.
"Uba, will you watch Ayla for a while?" Ona asked.
She smiled at the girl and took little Ayla who was wrapped in a carrying cloak. Swift hands secured the toddler to her hip. For some reason, having her sister's namesake nearby brought her comfort. Ona left with a couple of the other women who were picking berries a few yards away. She had not yet mastered carrying the basket, picking berries and keeping eager hands out of the way.
"Uba, what was the first Ayla like?"
Uba rocked back on heels in shock. He had never asked before about his birth mother. What could she say? She wasn't supposed to speak of the dead. But he did ask a direct question.
"She was different, mother said she was a medicine woman of the highest line, though she was born to the Others."
"Was she really an Other? Why would the Clan take her in?"
"Two earthquakes ago, the Clan had been traveling to find a cave. Mother found her lying on the ground near death. Brun told her to leave her, but she pleaded to take the child and care for her. Iza was a healer, and couldn't let any creature suffer if she could help. Your mother was the same way."
"Uba," he paused, searching for the words," did mama fit in with the Clan? Was it ever hard for her?"
She looked tenderly at her son, knowing his concern was not just for his mother. "She was tested many times. Her totem was not an easy one to live with. But she was named 'Woman Who Hunts' and was rewarded for her trials." Uba's voice became soft as she remembered her sister. "The Others must live a lot differently than us. She often was insolent to Br, er, our former leader. But she was a good daughter and the man of our hearth loved her as no other."
"She must have had a powerful totem," Durc said, "I heard a rumor once, that she had been cursed many times. Is that true?"
Uba felt goose bumps rise on her flesh and look around. Too much speaking of the dead might draw bad spirits to you. "Yes, the first time was when it was discovered she had been practicing with the sling. She was cursed with one moon's passing. The second time was right after you were born for a few days. And the last time was when she gave you to me."
Durc knew that his mother was uneasy, but he wanted answers. He tried to approach the situation with more tact. "You said she was cursed about the time I was born. Did that have anything to do with me??"
Uba looked up and nodded. He should know how precarious his first days had been. "We thought you were born deformed. Your mother did not want to dispose of you, so she ran away to a cave. Brun was very angry and would've lost face if he were forced to give in to a woman. Before the day that you had to be accepted, she returned and begged for your life. The mog-ur named you after her favorite legend, 'The Legend of Durc."
He shivered. That had always been his favorite story, not just because his name was in it. How much alike was he to his mama?
"I am glad she was wise and that I am here." He stopped motioning, allowing Uba to return to gathering. Durc knew that he had pushed the limits of acceptable conversation. But he was elated; each bit of information about his mama was as sweet as honey.
Thonolan watched the young man carefully. According to the relationships of his people, Durc was related to him. In some ways he reminded him of Ayla, strong, wise and gifted. Other times he seemed fully clan and seemed like a stranger. The Mother wanted Durc woven into a great purpose. What was this purpose that he had with the Clan?
The wind whispered through the trees and followed an invisible trail in the grass. Rising up, it blew across his ears. "He is the only son of the clan."
oooooooooo
Winter came early and had taken the clan by surprise. Many were not yet ready for the cold season and were ill prepared to last the winter in comfort. Brun felt the heaviness of leadership and dreaded winter for the first time. Always he had prepared the clan well in advance, but he had taken up leadership when the leaves had already started to turn. How many people would starve or die this winter? He worried about the older members, and he worried about the young. If only they didn't have so many to feed.
Surveying the clusters of hearths, he again thought of who should be the next leader. Brac would be the logical choice now that he was a man, but he was young. He did not want to repeat the same mistake that he had done with the son of his hearth. Durc was strong and able, the Gray Wolf was a good totem for him. But could he learn to lead? After all, he is Her son. She would have been a good leader if she had been a man. He again weighed each member of the clan and again found them wanting. His choice would be either Brac or Durc. Though they were young, the need for a leader was greater. Brun doubted that he would last the winter himself. As leader would make sure there was food at every hearth before he would eat. He was getting older too. Though Uba gave him poultices and medicines, he still felt his age.
Goov approached the leader, his thoughts along the same vain. Nodding, they headed to the back of the cave where Goov could convene with the spirits.
"I think it will be either Brac or Durc. Each have strong and weak points."
Goov nodded, "I will ask the spirits what they want." He began with the formal ancient language as he called the spirits together.
Thonolan felt an eerie sensation and shivered. The clan spirits were gathering around them, and he wasn't sure what his purpose was. He felt uncomfortable around the foreign spirits, yet at the same time he felt at home.
"This insignificant mog-ur has one request," Goov began motioning, "he would ask that the spirits help the clan make a choice. Our leader is no longer, and we need a new permanent one. This man would ask the spirits who the next leader should be." He continued his motions and then stopped. The datura he had drunk earlier was beginning to take affect. Slowly, Goov felt himself lose control over his body and sank to the floor.
The spirits looked at each other with wise eyes. Ursus turned to Thonolan, "it is your responsibility to show him."
"Me?" He gasped, "why would you need me to do this? I don't know what should be done."
"You do know. Search your memories. The Mother has given you the responsibility to weave the threads." Ursus sat back and looked at him expectantly.
Thonolan looked at them helplessly. Thinking back to when Creb was with him, he approached Goov's unconscious form. Kneeling beside him, he put his hand in his head and accessed his thoughts. Goov was traveling in a murky loamy place when Thonolan contacted him. He went through the mog-ur's memories of both men. But he still didn't know which one to guide him to.
From somewhere, a breeze blew and caressed him. "Weave the threads. You've seen what must be."
Suddenly, he recalled what had been revealed to him of the future. The choice was clear. Slowly, he guided the mog-ur's thoughts and showed him who would be the future leader.