A/N: This kinda starts out sorta slow since I still have to introduce a few things into this. But it picks up pretty fast. Also, one last time, if you don't like randomness, you wont like this fic. But have some fun and read it anyway, it is really funny.
Disclaimer: I stated it on the first page for any stupid people. People that look for no disclaimers are stupid and will remain that way until they stop it, have some fun, or just plain drop dead.
A/N: If I missed any corrections, don't rip me apart for it, This was the ROUGH draft and it was one of the few matches I was able to recover.
Inuyasha Vs. Sesshomaru
Minion: Hello, and welcome to Ultimate Anime Showdown echo echo echo
Fans is the grand stands begin to go nuts and cheer wildly
Minion: I am the owner, producer, director, head honcho, the big cheese, the supreme one, the author or you can call me…
Vegea: Shut up already. Geese, to think I agreed to help you with this. What was I thinking? This is going to get like 2 reviews from people talking about cheese or monkeys or pirates or monkey pirates searching for cheese.
Minion: Despite the fact that all this will happen anyway, I'm going to do it anyway. Why? Because….because…ummm…
Vegea: My point.
Minion: Anyway, I think we have a good match planed here tonight.
Vegea: That indeed we do. These two guys have a long history.
Minion: But before we get to the match, I have to get our special guest announcers in here with us.
Vegea: Our what? You didn't say anything about "guest announcers".
Minion: To bad, their almost here.
Vegea: Who are they….?
Kikyo walks in the door in the back
Vegea: Oh god, not her.
Kikyo: Glares at Vegea and walks over to take her seat next to him
Minion: I trust you know each other.
Vegea: Unfortunately.
Minion: Good now that shes here, I can have our other guest come in.
Kikyo: Wait who else is supposed to be….
Naraku walks in the door
Kikyo: Hisssssss
Vegea: Where the hell did you get the idea to have these two in the same room?
Minion: Sugar high. Why?
Vegea: Shacks head from side to side in disbelief This isn't going to work and you know it.
Minion: Laughs evilly I know, that's what makes it fun.
Kikyo hasn't stopped hissing at Naraku and he hasn't even taken his seat
Naraku: You didn't say shed be….
Vegea: Yeah yeah yeah, join the club. Now take a freakin seat before I kill you.
Naraku sits down next to Minion and puts on his headset
Minion: O…k…then. Well now. Now that the cast is set I think we can finally begin the match.
Vegea: Thank god.
Minion: Our first contender is known by many names. The Lord of the Western lands, the Son of the great Dog Demon….
Naraku: Fluffy.
Sesshomaru, who is backstage glares up at the announcer box
Naraku: Sorry, couldn't help myself.
Inuyasha who is waiting in another room backstage hears this
Inuyasha: Begins to crack up
Vegea: Does the same Oh man…..Fluffy?….Who the hell…..came up with that one?
Fangirls begin to pick up torches they have under their seats and set them on fire
Vegea: Oh crap. Ummmmm
Minion: Ahem, anyway, he has two different swords.
Naraku: And one arm.
Sesshomaru shoots another glare up to the announcer booth
Minion: Ok, thats enough.
Vegea: And hear he is, Sesshomaru.
Sesshomaru steps out on stage with "Voices" playing in the background. The music can only barley be heard over all the Fangirls shrieking over their idol
Sesshomaru: OH NO, NOT AGAIN.
Fangirls rush the stage and dog pile on top of Sess. Hoping to get to hold him or get some of his clothes
Vegea: Damn, that guy has a lot of fans.
Minion: No kidding
Sess. I'm calling this from here on out since my fingers are tired and I am too lazy to type the whole thing out is somehow able to get out from the mass of Fangirls and walk away like nothing happened
Sess. Enters the ring
Minion: Ok, that went better then I thought.
Naraku: It did?
Minion: Yup, I thought they would kill him and take him away and put him is some sort of shrine.
Vegea: Now to get to our other contender.
Minion: Yes, oddly enough, this is the brother of our first one and….well, umm…Kikyo, you tell us something about him. You know a lot about him.
Naraku: Yeah, she hasn't even said anything yet.
Kikyo: Death Glare
Vegea: Ok, never mind then. Anyway, this guy has one sword….
Naraku: And two arms.
Minion: Shut up already.
Naraku: Sorry, I just find it rather ironic.
Vegea: Ahem, he also has a love life more complicated then programming a VCR for your grandparents.
Minion: Lots of girl trouble.
Vegea: Here is Inuyasha.
Inuyasha steps out on stage with "Bark at the Moon" playing in the background. The crowd erupts in a loud cheer, Fangirls shrieking, not as many as Sess., and lots of guys just yelling and screaming. You can hear comments like "You Rock," and "Your so cool," even "Who does your hair?" The lights are flashing really fast making it look like he is moving in little jumps
Inuyasha: Simply stands a the top of the stage and looks out into the vast crowd
fans fall over shaking
Minion: WTF?!?
Vegea: What is going on?
Naraku: I think their all having seizures.
Minion: WHAT?
Inuyasha: ?????
Minion: TURN OFF THE LIGHTS NOW!!!!
lights begin to flash even faster
Vegea: What the hell is going on?
most of the humans is the crowd are shaking uncontrollably, not many demons are being affected.
Minion: Who the hell is one lights?
Vegea: Ummm, I think Knives is.
Minion: No wonder.
Vegea: Knives, cut it out now before we fill your room with spiders.
Knives: eek Turns off lights
Stadium is now dark
Minion: KNIVES!!!
Knives: What? You said turn out the lights.
Vegea: He was talking about the flashing ones.
Knives: Whoops, sorry. Flips a lever
Stadium is now lit normally
Minion: Well, that adds to our lawsuit.
Vegea: Maybe the fans will forget.
Naraku: Yeah right.
Minion: Match people.
Inuyasha: Damn, for a second I thought I was killing people with my looks.
Vegea: Oh yeah, that's right.
Inuyasha walks down to the ring where his brother is standing
Minion: Now, it will be tradition, that before a match starts, the contenders may say whatever insults they wish before they beat each other senseless.
Inuyasha: We're going to settle this once and for all.
Sess.: Worthless half breed.
Inuyasha: Oh, like I haven't heard that one before. At least I'm not called fluffy.
Sess.: Glare I am not called that.
Inu yes, I'm doing it here to, I'm lazy, sue me Oh yeah, what about that sign points to a poster a fan is holding up "I love you Fluffy"
Sess.: ……..
Inu.: And what is with that…thing you have on your shoulder? What is the point of it?
Sess: …………….
Inu: There is no use for it. So why do you have it?
Sess: Start the damn match.
Minion: Ok, the rules are rather simple, you can kill each other for all I care sense no one will be dead in the long run.
Sess/Inu: WHAT!?!?!?!
Minion: Don't worry, we have a great medical staff here.
Inu: Crap, I thought I was going to be able to kill.
Vegea: Oh well, just start the freakin fight.
Air horn rings to signal the start of the match
Inu: Takes out the Tetsuaiga
Sess: Reaches for Tokijen
Inu: NOW DIE!!!! Swing his sword at Sess but he blocks with his own sword
Inu jumps back and Sess doesn't really move
Inu: Feh, lets see you block this. Raises his sword
Sess: Points Tokigen at Inu to unleash a burst of energy at him.
Minion: Oh boy folks, it looks like we're going to see a power struggle between the to swords to see which is better.
Vegea: This should be good.
Naraku: I hope they both die.
Minion: You'll have to wait, we have to go to commercial.
Naraku: WHAT!?!?!
Minion: What, you thought I paid for all this myself? HA!
Naraku: Dammit, I wanted to see this.
Random guy: Ok, so I find myself in a room with a bunch of sharp objects.
But I'm not alone.
Naraku is in there with me.
So I ask myself….What would Inuyasha do?
Shows Inuyasha at his desk
Inuyasha: Begins to laugh evilly DO I REALLY HAVE TO ANSWER THAT?
Subway, Eat Fresh.
Sails persons guy: "Are you wondering where to get your top of the line boa's?"
Well, look no more.
Sesshomaru's Boa's R' US'.
That's right, your favorite cold blooded killer now has his own store line.
Get high quality Boa's, or even our cheapo rack.
Sess: Buy my stuff……Or die.
Producer: Also in close business with Naraku brand sharp objects.
Minion: And we're back.
Vegea: Where were we?
Minion: about to see which sword is better.
Vegea: well, lets see it.
Inu: RRRAAAHHHH shots off the Wind Scar
Sess: shots his bolts of energy at the same time
A large explosion happens in a bright white light, and everyone is blinded for a few seconds
Naraku: Damn that was bright.
Vegea: Well, who won?
Minion: We are about to see.
Smoke clears, and both Inu and Sess are still standing
Minion: Well, I guess it is a draw:
The Tetsiauga turns into dust.
Vegea: Wait, I think, yup, Inuyasha's sword is gone.
Naraku: standing up and yelling YES!!!!!!!!!
Sess: I don't even see why I wanted that thing now, now that I have……
The Tokigen also turns into dust
Inu: HA!!!
Naraku: is now craking up and laughing uncontrollably: THIS IS TO PERFECT!!!!
Inu: Feh, I guess I'll just have to do this the old fashioned way. IRON REAVER SOUL STEELER!!!
Sess: dodges
Vegea: WTF did he just say? Iron Beaver Pumpkin Steeler?
Minion: Your insane.
Inu: Dammit, I have to finish this before….I no….too late. Hair begins to pick up in the wind that isn't even the room.
Minion: Oh crap, hes going nuts.
Vegea: No, hes going full demon.
Minion: Same thing.
Sess: oh my dear brother, will you ever learn? Eyes turn red
Vegea: I think we're getting more then we could of ever of hopped for tonight.
Minion: Indeed, this should be good.
Inu: eyes now entirely red and does hes signature finger crack
Sess: Turns into his full demon form of a large dog demon
Minion: WTF is that? A giant, mutant poodle?
Sess: glare
Inu: RAH attacks Sess
Sess: demented voice Foolish brother, you can't defeat me. sends him flying back to one side of the ring
Inu: gets back up
Sess: Begins to walk over to Inu but falls over
Minion: That's right, he only has 3 legs, doesn't make for a good demon form.
Sess: Damn
Inu: AHHHHHH begins to charge Sess
Sess: Turns back into human form
Fangirls faint from the sight
Sess: You just don't give up do you?
Inu: RAH still running at him
Sess: Sigh I guess it is time.. To show you my true weapon. reaches for…
Vegea: He isn't…
Minion: He must be desperate….
Naraku: WTF is that thing going to do…?
Sess: Sess reaches for his furr coat I have no freakin idea what its real name is and holds it in both hands waiting for Inu
Inu: RRRRAAAAHHHH reaches Sess
Sess: Hits Inu over the head with his furr
Loud metal noise
Sess: repeats the first step over and over again jumping up and down and hitting Inu over the head
Inu: has little birds flying around his head before he falls over backwards
Minion: Ok, that's enough, Sesshomaru wins.
Vegea: By a land slide.
Naraku: And a hand full of furr.
"Voices" begins to play again but, you still can't hear it over all the fan girls shrieking
Minion: There is just one thing that bugs me, what the hell is in that thing?
Veega: Yeah, I've been wondering about that for some time now.
Sess: Shruggs Ok, I'll show you. Cuts open a hole in the side of his furr
He turns it upside down and starts to shake it
A few bricks fall out, then a few dumbbells, some cement blocks, Jaken falls out
Minion: WTF!?!?!
Jaken: Where am I?
more stuff begins to fall out, some pennies, a few dollars, the Shikon Jewl
Naraku: HEY!!!!
Sess: Whoops, you weren't supposed to see that.
Grabs Jewl and continues shaking.
Sess: . .
More bricks fall out, a few horse shows, and finally, Richard Somons falls out
Minion: ????????????
Vegea: ???????????
Naraku: ??????????
Kikyo: ……….
Sess: How the hell did he get here?
Richard Simons runs off stage and into the back with a confused look on his face
Minion: Is that it?
Vegea: Yeah, your not hiding any weapons of mass destruction in three are you?
Sess: Ummmm closes his furr bag and starts to walk off stage whistling pretending he didn't hear anything
Vegea: Well, what a way to start this off.
Minion: To think, we have even more randomness in store then this in later matches
Naraku: How the hell can you top that?
Minion: Watch me.
Vegea: looks at Kikyo Have you said more then 3 words this whole time.
Kikyo: Nods her head up and down
Vegea: Sigh I still don't think this is going to work.
I beg you, Review this.
If you don't, I'll send an evil monkey after you in your sleep to maul you to death. :D