H2G2

Ford/Arthur

PG-13

Disclaimer: Don't own it. No offense is intended.

A/N: If you don't like slash couplings then you shouldn't be reading this. Reviews are hearted, flames are accepted. However, flames are also printed out, and pasted to my kitchen cupboards so I can laugh and mock them while making coffee before class every morning. PWP Ahoy! And I did write the love-scene that follows this, but I don't think accepts such things.

The Tea is Cold

The Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster had hit Arthur Dent's stomach with much the force of a golden brick. Arthur briefly detected a hint of what might have been lemon before most of his senses left the spaceship Heart of Gold. The effect of this drink on such a primitive carbon based life form was total and utter intoxication. After a long quarrelsome discussion with Zaphod Beeblebrox about the circumstances of his current life in space, and his annoying need for something familiar to hang on to of his past, this being in the form of tea, Arthur drunkenly came to an epiphany.

Which is why, ten minutes later and inhibitions thoroughly thrown out, one Ford Prefect found Arthur crawling under the covers of his bed, and slurring quietly, " I finally figured it out, Ford."

" What in the photon are you prattling on about? And why-" Ford startled when Arthur emerged into the dark air of the room behind him.

" I know why you brought me here."

" Might it have to do with your planet exploding?" He could smell the Gargle Blaster on the man's breath.

Arthur lazily traced circles where he assumed Ford's spine was, sending shivers all over his body. The ape decedent nuzzled the back of Ford's neck and head with his face, inhaling quickly the strange smells. The mild scents cleared some of the alcoholic mist shrouding his mind.

But his smile was crooked when he murmured, " Hmm, that's part of it."

Ford Prefect found himself unusually nervous, and swallowed loudly. He made a noise in his throat that suggested to Arthur he was not capable of speaking, but that Arthur should continue whatever it was he had to say.

" You fancy me, Ford. "

Ford Prefect nearly sat up straight.

" Did Zaphod put you up to this?"

" Well, it's funny you should mention him. He's the one that made me realize that- that..." Arthur's voice trailed off in a distracted manner.

It only took Ford a few moments to come to terms with the distraction. Arthur Dent's fingers were in the midst of unbuttoning the front of Ford's shirt when they had come across a bit of trouble with the fourth one down from the top. Ford had difficulties with this particular button too. Unbeknown st to him this was because the button had been replaced early in the shirt's life by a rather elderly lady who chose a button two sizes two large. Ford's heart jumped a few beats then raced to catch up. His hand brushed Arthur's away frantically.

Less distracted Arthur finished his thought, " ...All this time I've been wandering around looking for some familiarity."

" Tea."

" Yes, quite. But, something familiar has been here the whole time."

" Arthur, what does that have to do with me?"

" Now who's being daft?"

"..."

" It's the reason you brought me with you."

" It's not because you're my good friend?" The close proximity with Arthur was taking it's toll on Ford, and he trembled slightly.

" Fifteen years on a planet," Arthur soothed, feeling the tremors, " That's a long time to be away from everything you knew. I'd even go so far as to guess it's enough time to grow attached. Maybe even believe you had lost touch with what was out here. I'm sure you just wanted something familiar near you."

" That's very astute thinking for someone as drunk as you are, Arthur. I'm impressed."

" I've been sober for a while," Arthur acknowledged.

Ford was about to comment on the slim abilities Arthur's species had of sobering up from the universe's most disastrous drink, but the words died on his lips. Arthur's hand, long since leaving the buttons alone, had slithered up to the loose collar and pulled it aside to expose the flesh of Ford's neck and shoulder. What stopped any form of speech was the searing trail of kisses Arthur was agonizingly slowly placing from Ford's collar bone up to his ear. Once there, Arthur started nibbling gently. Ford could not help releasing a soft gasp.

Earlobe idly planted between tongue and lips Arthur managed, " You wanted some- someone familiar."

The words came out quieter. They sounded unsure. They sounded more like Arthur Dent.

" And you?" Ford bit his bottom lip to keep his body from writhing in bliss.

He felt the light smile pressing against his neck and the hot rush of air when Arthur hissed, " Damn the tea."

Again, I did write the love scene/ smut, but I don't think I'm allowed to post it here.