Chapter 6

And so it came to an unremarkable night about a fortnight later, and Duo was lying quite calmly on his bed, when a muffled announcement came across the tannoy. It was muffled, Duo realised, as it was the ops tanoy, which did not come into his rooms, for obvious reasons. Yet Duo knew the content of this one anyway. Captive or not, he was still an alliance soldier, and had engaged in his own small espionage, despite the fact that he had no plausible way of communicating with anyone. Anyhow, this was how he knew that this was the result of another operation to kidnap Heero. He also knew the reason why the rebels were so eager to capture Lieutenant-Colonel Heero Yuy. There had been rumours about it in the base. A new sort of mobile suit, a completely new system, which only the very best could handle, and an armour so strong that it could even withstand a blast from Barge's beam cannon. Heero, being Commander J's golden boy, had got to know of it, and supposedly was the only person bar him and Septem who had, even General Chang being excluded, what with his highbrow morals and quick temper being a very real obstruction. Duo, however, believed none of it, nor knew any of this supposed data. He simply rolled over with his book, continued reading, and waited the injection of a disgruntled Heero into his room.

However, things were yet again not going entirely to plan. This time, Alex and Mueller had come in looking sheepish, and placed the sack, though still roughly, on the floor, with no real heart to kick or beat it. Their explanation this time, was simply that "He was in Yuy's room...and it was dark..." And out of the sack rolled and extremely disgruntled (not to mention uncomfortable) Lieutenant Colonel Trowa Barton.

"Just leave!" Relena pointed at the door, and the two stooges, really living up to their nickname this time, were only too happy to obey.

"Why we ever hired those two I don't know!" Zechs shook his head.

"Okay, Mr. Always Right!" sniffed Dorothy, who was equally irritated. "Don't go rubbing it in!" All three glared at the floor a moment, wallowing in their own bad temper, when finally Zechs sighed, and offered a hand to the now thoroughly confused and irritated Trowa.

"Really sorry about this!" he said apologetically, while helping the boy up. Trowa however, pulled away and glared at them.

"You will get nothing from me, so if you want information, you may as well kill me now." He said, in his monotonic voice.

"What if we want something other than information, Mr. Barton?" Dorothy put on the sultry voice again and leaned closer to the officer, who gulped audibly. Relena took this opportunity to steer Dorothy away and out of the door.

"Please excuse my friend!" She called over her shoulder. "She forgot her medication again!" So saying, she and Dorothy exited the room, only to run down the corridor in hysterics once the door was closed again.

"Eh, don't worry, they did that to Duo too, and he's still alive!" Zechs smiled to himself, and beckoned Trowa to follow.

"Duo?" The boy was startled. "Duo's here?"

"Yeah," Zechs put on a disconcerting grin. "You're sharing a room with him!"

"Eh? Trowa? Well, that's unexpected!" Duo sat up and smiled at his colleague.

"Duo!" Trowa's emotionless mask failed him at this point, as the relief that his colleague was neither dead, mangled, tortured or even had a hangnail flooded onto his face. "I - Everyone thought you were dead."

"Nope, although I am dead bored." Duo yawned, stretched, and made room for Trowa on the bed, which the other boy took.

"But - why haven't you tried to escape?" At this, Duo burst out laughing.

"Oh yeah, I've tried more times than I can count, but tried is all it ever came to. The amount of times I've been yanked back or tripped over a well-placed chair was just not funny by the end of it. In fact, I think you've arrived on the week anniversary of my giving up trying." Trowa frowned, sure his colleague was just giving up far too easily, but tactfully changed the subject instead.

"So, uh, what do they want from us?"

"From us? Oh, nothing." Duo leaned back and carried on reading, but he couldn't ignore the increduluous look on Trowa's face.

"You see, we were supposed to be Heero, and they want something from him." Flicking over the page, Duo continued his explaination. "But this lot sent probably the two most idiotic people they had to get him, and that's why they ended up with us."

Trowa stared at the floor for a while, attempting to take what sounded like complete and utter stupidity on an inhuman scale, before eventually rejecting it as just an exaggeration. Next came thoughts of escape.

"Duo, you can't just give up like this. If General Chang had seen you, he would say you were collaborating with the enemy." Trowa fixed the other boy with his glare. Inwardly, Duo groaned. How did I know you were going to say that?

"What, by giving up trying to escape an inescapable place?" Duo continued reading. "Besides, I'm being far more use to the Alliance this way that by all the escape routes in the world. Did you really think I'd been idle?" However good the point, Trowa refused to concede it.

"Still your duty is to return to the Alliance and take up your place as a soldier."

"Fine! You try escaping!" exasperated, Duo met Trowa's with a scowl of equal intensity. "You think I like being stuck in here? I just happen to know that by every which route, this place is inescapable."

This, however, did not stop Trowa. That night, he planned his very first escape. "Straight through the kitchens, up the fire escape and out the manhole on the east side. He prepared himself, ready to fight off any guards which came his way, but to his initial confusion, there were none. He got all the way to the back door of the kitchens, the fire escape in sight, when a movement caught his eye. Unfortunately, he didn't have to do anything about it, as at that point, smothing heavy and wooden connected with his shins, sending him flying and causing a good deal of pain into the bargain. Landing on his stomach, Trowa instantly made to get up, but the impact of a weight on his back and the click of a gun prevented him. Suddenly a whooshing sound came closer, and a voice above him said

"Thrity-five metres and seven centimtres. Not bad, you beat Maxwell's first attempt!" The weight removed from his back, Trowa rolled over to find himself facing a purple-haired woman and a grinning strawberry blonde man. The woman was holding a mop, and Trowa reaslied with annoyance that his back was now sopping wet.

"A mop, Noin?" The man questioned, turning to the woman. "Inventive." She shrugged.

"First thing that came to hand." then she turned to Trowa, smiling, and helped him up.

"How did you know-" his disgruntled question was cut off by the other man.

"Ah, you see, that's the thing about the URA - we know everything!" The remark only made Trowa feel all the more irritated as he was marched back to his cell.

"Duo, delivery for you!" Called the man, knocking once before opening the door for Trowa. " Good night now!" And had it been a little lighter, Trowa felt sure he would have seen a deliberate effort to nettle him further.

"Escaping didn't work, huh?" Came Duo's sleepy voice from the darkness. Trowa opted not to say anything, and simply sat down on his bed. "See you met Treize, though."

"Treize?" Trowa frowned. "I don't- Wait, that guy wasn't - the Treize, was he?"

"Mmm-hmmm. Treize Kushrenada."

"But-how? I mean...he's.." Yet Duo had already gone to sleep, leaving Trowa to scheme along on his own.

Trowa, being a little more creative that Duo, thought up many different escape routes. However...

"Beneath a car as it leaves!"

"Twenty-eight metres, thirty-seven centimetres..."

"I'll disguise myself as a soldier...!

"Twenty-six metres, five centimetres..."

"The electrical mains should lead out..."

"Twenty metres, ninety-Don't touch that!!!"

"The water mains?"

"Eighteen metres, five centimetres...Trowa, you OK? Trowa? Answer me! Shit! Anyone know mouth-to mouth?"

"Guard changeover times, there's got to be a flaw then..."

"Fifteen metres, seventy-six centimetres...I did kinda think you'd be going for the gas mains next..."

"I'll try stealth..."

"BOO! Ten metres, nine centimetres. You're losing your touch!"

"I'll just walk, shall I?"

"Two metres, fifteen centimetres. Cardiac arrest, electrocution, drowning...any other deaths you'd like to sample?"

"Not really. And how do you always know when to bring that tape measure round?"

"I'm part of the URA, Trowa! We-"

"-know everything. Right."