Chapter 6: Snapee Wapee
A/N: I sware I had every intention of updating this story a lot sooner, and
I am sorry that I kept you waiting. We have been having a lot of computer
problems though and every time I tried to type it the computer would freeze
up on me. It's actually still not working well as I am typing this in
WordPad. I appreciate everyone's reviews! It's a lot more than I expected
to get off of this little story. I liked everyone's suggestions, and if I
find a place to fit one of them in I will be sure to do so. I would also
like to appologize for the many plot holes, and if I get a chance I will go
back and fix them. Enjoy.
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"What???!!" inquired my mum in a half pissed half confused tone. I hate it when she uses that voice, because I know there is no chance of ever getting away with telling less than the truth. I sighed and got into the story of how we got into a food fight. The way I told it, almost anyone would have a hard time keeping a straight face, but apparantly she was the exception. She was not at all amused.
"James Potter!" she bellowed, "How could you do something like that? It isn't only very immature and childish but it's also wasteful and dangerous. You could poke someone's eye out." She then stomped away furiosly. God.. she just had to use that excuse. As if chucking a few tomatoes and a plum or two will really poke someones eye out. We would have used pencils for that. Malfoy and Snape would have loved that....hey wait a second!
"Um, Moony," I asked nervously, "Where the hell was Snape during this whole thing?" He thought about it for a minute, and then just shrugged his shoulders. It apparantly was a good question, because everyone was looking around wondering where he was. Then he appeared out of the corner of an isle with an extremely smug look upon his face.
"I was talking to my mum. She asked me if I uh, needed anything" he said in a slightly nervous tone, which quickly changed over. "So I heard you dipshits managed to get yourselfs in a bit of hot water, yeah? Working here for a week now. Why you wanted to start a food fight at a Wal-Mart is beyond me anyways." We all glared at Sirus who gave us a sheepish grin and turned away. "Sod off Snape," said Sirius indignantly, "Or need I remind you of the stupid mistakes you have made, particularly with people?" Snape just stood there looking bewildered, so he proceeded. "What Snape, you don't remember the whole escapade with Saaanddddyyyyyy???"
Snape turned the brightest shade of crimson I have ever seen in my entire life. It made the manager look tame compared to what his face portrayed. Everyone burst into laughter, including Malfoy. Sirius then went into the details of how this one girl Sandy played him for a fool and asked him out. Oh, of course he said yes, because he had never had a girl interested in him in his whole life. Sandy then played a classical prank on him, the old bucket of water over the door of the restaraunt gag. He totally humiliated himself.
"STOP IT!!!" yelled Snape so loud that half of the store stopped what they were doing for a second. "You infradels! All of you shall pay for humilating me. I can't believe you would be so stupid to try and do this to me to begin with, seeing as I don't have to work and I could make your week a living hell if I so chose. But no, I think I will take the instant gratification instead."
He then murmured a spell that none of us could make out, and nothing happened. We then continued to laugh even harder at her, er him. But then all of a sudden a wide assortment of colorful makeup came floating at us. We all stopped laughing and stared at the growing assortment of blush, eyeshadow, facepaint, and every sort of makeup brush known to mankind. Before we knew it, we were being attacked.
I lost my sight temporarily due to all the facepaint covering my glasses. I wiped them off to reveal the freakshow that was our group. We were all pointing at eachother and laughing histerially. I made a beline for the nearest mirror, only to reveal myself absolutely caked with makeup. My whoe face was covered in white, with bright red put around my eyes, lips, and cheeks. And to top it all off, somehow a rainbow clown wig landed atop my head.
A group of the popular Ravenclaw guys and girls walked past us. They were pointing and laughing just as we were, except it was way more embarassing. Those were some fine as girls, damn. And I am sure that Lily felt the same way with thouse guys looking at her. The amount of crap we had on our face made Snape look like some sort of supermodel or something, christ!
Snape looked very pleased with himself. "You better have learned your lesson about making fun of me. It will just end up back on you.." he kept droaning on for what seemed like eternity about how we should respect him because he was so awesome. Sirius made a few snores which only made him go on longer. Sometime in the middle of the "I definitely came off on top of this one" part he got interupted by some lady resembling him, his mother.
"Oh Snapee Wapee!" called his mother in a babytalk tone "I hope you have been playing nicely with your little friends. I see you all have been laughing. I just hope you haven't been laughing too hard, or you might have wet yourself! Speaking of which, it's time to go. But before we leave we have to pick up some Depends, you are almost out dear. Now say goodbye, I am sure you will see them again soon enough."
"Yeah Snapee Wapee, we will definitely be seeing you soon," said Sirius, and we all started chuckling. "Don't forget those Depends though, we wouldn't want to have any accidents now would we?" He mouthed a variety of cusses at us and then flicked us off as he headed out the door. It took us a while to calm down and clean up the mess before we got into even more trouble. "Come on you guys," said Lily, "I think we have definitely had our day's worth of work. Let's get out of here." She paused for a moment and then said "Oh shit! My purse! I lost it somewhere in the store, we have to find it." We all groaned and then started walking into the nearby isle in search of the missing item.
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What do you think? Where will the purse end up, and what rediculous things will they have to go through in order to get it? R/R and tune into the next chapter to find out.
***************************************************************
"What???!!" inquired my mum in a half pissed half confused tone. I hate it when she uses that voice, because I know there is no chance of ever getting away with telling less than the truth. I sighed and got into the story of how we got into a food fight. The way I told it, almost anyone would have a hard time keeping a straight face, but apparantly she was the exception. She was not at all amused.
"James Potter!" she bellowed, "How could you do something like that? It isn't only very immature and childish but it's also wasteful and dangerous. You could poke someone's eye out." She then stomped away furiosly. God.. she just had to use that excuse. As if chucking a few tomatoes and a plum or two will really poke someones eye out. We would have used pencils for that. Malfoy and Snape would have loved that....hey wait a second!
"Um, Moony," I asked nervously, "Where the hell was Snape during this whole thing?" He thought about it for a minute, and then just shrugged his shoulders. It apparantly was a good question, because everyone was looking around wondering where he was. Then he appeared out of the corner of an isle with an extremely smug look upon his face.
"I was talking to my mum. She asked me if I uh, needed anything" he said in a slightly nervous tone, which quickly changed over. "So I heard you dipshits managed to get yourselfs in a bit of hot water, yeah? Working here for a week now. Why you wanted to start a food fight at a Wal-Mart is beyond me anyways." We all glared at Sirus who gave us a sheepish grin and turned away. "Sod off Snape," said Sirius indignantly, "Or need I remind you of the stupid mistakes you have made, particularly with people?" Snape just stood there looking bewildered, so he proceeded. "What Snape, you don't remember the whole escapade with Saaanddddyyyyyy???"
Snape turned the brightest shade of crimson I have ever seen in my entire life. It made the manager look tame compared to what his face portrayed. Everyone burst into laughter, including Malfoy. Sirius then went into the details of how this one girl Sandy played him for a fool and asked him out. Oh, of course he said yes, because he had never had a girl interested in him in his whole life. Sandy then played a classical prank on him, the old bucket of water over the door of the restaraunt gag. He totally humiliated himself.
"STOP IT!!!" yelled Snape so loud that half of the store stopped what they were doing for a second. "You infradels! All of you shall pay for humilating me. I can't believe you would be so stupid to try and do this to me to begin with, seeing as I don't have to work and I could make your week a living hell if I so chose. But no, I think I will take the instant gratification instead."
He then murmured a spell that none of us could make out, and nothing happened. We then continued to laugh even harder at her, er him. But then all of a sudden a wide assortment of colorful makeup came floating at us. We all stopped laughing and stared at the growing assortment of blush, eyeshadow, facepaint, and every sort of makeup brush known to mankind. Before we knew it, we were being attacked.
I lost my sight temporarily due to all the facepaint covering my glasses. I wiped them off to reveal the freakshow that was our group. We were all pointing at eachother and laughing histerially. I made a beline for the nearest mirror, only to reveal myself absolutely caked with makeup. My whoe face was covered in white, with bright red put around my eyes, lips, and cheeks. And to top it all off, somehow a rainbow clown wig landed atop my head.
A group of the popular Ravenclaw guys and girls walked past us. They were pointing and laughing just as we were, except it was way more embarassing. Those were some fine as girls, damn. And I am sure that Lily felt the same way with thouse guys looking at her. The amount of crap we had on our face made Snape look like some sort of supermodel or something, christ!
Snape looked very pleased with himself. "You better have learned your lesson about making fun of me. It will just end up back on you.." he kept droaning on for what seemed like eternity about how we should respect him because he was so awesome. Sirius made a few snores which only made him go on longer. Sometime in the middle of the "I definitely came off on top of this one" part he got interupted by some lady resembling him, his mother.
"Oh Snapee Wapee!" called his mother in a babytalk tone "I hope you have been playing nicely with your little friends. I see you all have been laughing. I just hope you haven't been laughing too hard, or you might have wet yourself! Speaking of which, it's time to go. But before we leave we have to pick up some Depends, you are almost out dear. Now say goodbye, I am sure you will see them again soon enough."
"Yeah Snapee Wapee, we will definitely be seeing you soon," said Sirius, and we all started chuckling. "Don't forget those Depends though, we wouldn't want to have any accidents now would we?" He mouthed a variety of cusses at us and then flicked us off as he headed out the door. It took us a while to calm down and clean up the mess before we got into even more trouble. "Come on you guys," said Lily, "I think we have definitely had our day's worth of work. Let's get out of here." She paused for a moment and then said "Oh shit! My purse! I lost it somewhere in the store, we have to find it." We all groaned and then started walking into the nearby isle in search of the missing item.
***************************************************************
What do you think? Where will the purse end up, and what rediculous things will they have to go through in order to get it? R/R and tune into the next chapter to find out.