It's not mine; it's all J.K. Rowling's.

Chapter 4: In Which James Runs into a Multitude of Objects

Or

In Which Lily Meets James' Shower

James watched Lily run up the stairs until he could no longer see her shining red hair swinging behind her; then he sagged against the wall. The urge to go running after her and kiss her senseless was actually lessening. This was definitely a good thing. Gods she was so amazing and she'd flirted with him and let him kiss her, twice! His mind was so far away he barely registered it when Remus emerged from a corridor to his right and started toward him.

"Still in the Lily Zone?" Remus asked politely.

"Yeah," James said trying to get the feel of her lips out of his head.

"So I take it breakfast went well." Remus said pulling James away from the wall and toward the stairs.

"She let me kiss her."

"Sounds brilliant."

"How can she be so perfect?"

"Ummm...good genes?"

"Yeah the jeans are great, but I don't think that's it. But, that jean skirt today, oh boy that was nice. I have to admit, I thought the tank top was a little bit better. Although I have grown rather fond of those baggy t-shirts of hers. It's so sexy the way they fall up when she's outside practicing her gymnav...no... oh darn... what are they called?"

"Gymnastics. Gods, you are a complete goner. I didn't even mean that type of jeans."

"Oh, oops."

"Yeah, come on, walk a bit faster here, Sirius wants a chat." Remus pulled James through another doorway and led him up to the little used tower the Marauders occasionally used as a hideout.

"James! Finally, it took you long enough," Sirius said hopping off the ledge he'd been sitting on.

"He's still in Lily Land, Sirius. It might be a while before he gets back. Apparently she kissed him."

"Is it possible to taste like strawberries?" James asked. No one seemed inclined to answer him though.

"James, I just want you to pull your brain together long enough to hear me out. Ok?" Sirius said very slowly.

"Alright, I'm working on it," James said firmly pushing his thoughts of Lily's hair to the back of his mind. It wasn't really working though because as soon as he got rid of one thought another would pop up. Like that sneaking suspicion he had that her freckles might cover her entire body. Gods he wanted to...SHIT...he was supposed to be putting those thoughts away. This was harder than you'd think. Finally he managed to focus on Sirius.

"Well, you see, I've come up with a way to make up for the flash incident. So, you know how your parents said you could have one friend over for Christmas and then invite everyone for New Years?"

"Yeah."

"Alright, I asked Remus and I'm going over to his house now for Christmas, meaning you have a free invitation. I was thinking that you could ask Lily."

"But she's going home for Christmas."

"I know, but you can at least ask her. If she says no I'll find another way to make it up to you."

"Sirius, she's going home. Do you really think she'd rather come home with me that go see her family?"

"It's fine if you don't want my wonderful, amazing, heartfelt gift. Don't use it. But if you change your mind it's still there. It's a full moon the day after Christmas, so I'm still going with Moony."

James looked at Remus who shrugged, "I'll think about it."
There were several moments of silence before Remus said, "Let's go back to the dorm, we need to get our stuff together so I don't end up taking home Sirius' socks again."

"No kidding. I think Sirius is taking my shirts, too."

"I do not have your shirts James, and Remus it's not my fault your socks fit better than mine."

The trio laughed and headed out.

They didn't even know that the fireplace that provided warmth to the tower occasionally carried sound down to the dungeons. Since they didn't know that, it's pretty obvious they didn't know that a man was thudding his head against the wall in the dungeons saying, "That darn worthless mudblood. How do I get myself into these things?"

At the same time...

"Why are we doing this again?" Lily asked.

"Because you're intoxicated by James' soap, so if we steal it not only will you have some nice soap you'll also be able to tell if you're only attracted to him because of his smell."

"But he smells so good; I don't want him to stop."

"But you can't know if your feelings are really smell induced or otherwise."

"You realize that you were supposed to talk me out of stealing his soap."

"Yeah, that's what a friend would be for. On the other hand, a best friend is the one who'll go with you to help steal the soap."

"Oh gods, I can't believe we're doing this, "Lily moaned.

Ally looked around and dragged Lily up the staircase to the boy's dorm. As they reached James' door they peeped in.

"The coast is clear," Ally said walking in.

Lily followed, but kept shooting furtive glances around. After all, Sirius could never be trusted not to show up with a camera at the wrong moment.

"Oh boy, we're going to see their bathroom!" Ally giggled.

"If it's as much a mess as their room is, I'm disgusted already."

"Actually it's pretty clean Lils. Come on, I swear nothing will bite you. Besides I don't know which one's James'.

Lily reluctantly followed Ally into the bathroom. It wasn't that bad actually. Taking deep breaths Lily figured so far so good. This was going to work out fine.

Ally picked up a bottle of cologne from the shelf by the sink, "You know Lils it might be his cologne that has you so enchanted."

"I don't think he wears cologne, besides the scent smells pretty soapy to me."

"Well you never know until you try it," Ally said and sprayed some into the air.

Lily immediately started coughing. Shit that stuff was strong. Who in their right mind would buy that much less wear it? Lily stumbled over and opened the small window, sticking her head out taking in deep breaths of fresh air.

"Hey, give me some air. I'm dying in here," Ally said shoving her.

"Bet that's Sirius'," Lily said when they'd finally managed to fan enough of it out the window to make the air breathable again.

"No kidding," Ally said and threw it out the window.

It took Lily a moment to register that Ally had just THROWN someone's bottle of cologne out an open window which opened onto who knows what. "Oh my gods! What did you just do?!?!"

"What? I didn't want him to ever wear that stuff again."

Lily stuck her head out of the window and looked down. Three 1st years were clustered around the shattered bottle gesturing wildly. They probably thought someone was trying to kill them or send them a heavenly signal or something. Oh well. "No more throwing things out windows," Lily said firmly as she pulled her head back in.

"Ok, ok. I was just doing the Hogwarts community a huge favor."

"You know Ally, if you told Sirius to get rid of the cologne he would. I mean he's only completely in love with you."

"He's not."

"Is too."

"Is not."

"Yeah, then how do you explain the fact that he hasn't gone out with anyone since the school year started. Usually he's gone through at least 5 girls by now. Sara Sawyer told me that he was cleaning up his act to impress a girl. Now, the fact remains that nearly every girl in Hogwarts would beg to go out with him, leaving very few girls he needs to impress. In fact let me think, who's the only girl who has ever turned him down? Hmmm..."

"Me."

"Yeah, you. Wonder what that means?" Lily said sarcastically taking a few cautious sniffs of the other bottles of cologne while she talked. Shaking her head she said, "Well it's not these; it must be the soap."

"You really think he likes me?" Ally asked drawing Lily's full attention.

"Yeah, why?"

"Well I just, I kind of sort of might like him," Ally said in a rush.

Lily grinned, "I was beginning to suspect that."

"Yeah anyways, let try the soap," Ally pulled back the shower curtain and stepped into the small shower. There were four different soap racks, which had four different soaps resting on them, and the soaps were all four different colors. "Wow," Ally giggled, "Talk about obsessive."

"No kidding," Lily said, "I just use your soap."

"I seriously bet that's Sirius'."

Lily groaned at the pun.

"What? It looks like his kind of thing. I bet it smells horrendous." Ally picked it up and gave it a sniff, "Not bad actually. It must be Remus'." They both laughed. Ally grabbed the ivory soap, "This looks like something you'd like the smell off."

"Really, why is that?" Lily asked taking it from her.

"Oh you know," Ally said dramatically leaning on the side of the shower, "Simple yet alluring, pure yet dirty..."

"Merlin, you're so silly. You're getting high off Sirius' cologne aren't you?"

"You bet it just smells so darn good." She laughed pretending to faint.

Lily took a cautious sniff of the soap in her hand and nearly fainted herself. This was it, the smell that had her acting so crazy. And it was all hers now; she resisted the urge to laugh evilly. "This is it," Lily said, "Let's go."

"Let me smell it," Ally said.

Lily had stretched out her hand, offering the soap to Ally, when they heard was a loud crash from the other room. Both girls froze.

"Damn."

"Do you know how long that table has sat in that exact spot James?"

"Sirius, stop bugging James; you were in charge of keeping him from running into things, so technically it's your fault. You know he's completely out of it."

"I am not completely out of it."

"He's right Remus, Lily Land has to be in 'it' somewhere."

Lily exchanged a glance with Ally. Then Ally grabbed Lily, pulled her into the shower, and closed the curtain. Now the smart and polite thing to do would be to announce their presence, but obviously this whole situation was going to be horribly embarrassing even if you went about it politely, so why bother? Listening in to conversations can also provide a wealth of blackmail material, and that's always useful. Ally grinned at Lily and mouthed, "Lily Land?" Lily shrugged. She hadn't told Ally yet about the flirting and the kissing. She'd been too hung up on the soap and telling Ally about the small difficulty that the Dark Lord was after her. Strangely enough Ally had thought the soap was the more pressing of the two problems.

"I can't believe she let you kiss her. Now you're going to be completely useless all of break."

Ally's eyes widened and Lily turned bright red. Ally shoved her and whispered, "Way to go Lily!" This caused Lily to turn even redder.

"Hey Remus, have you seen my toothbrush?"

"Sirius, why would I have your toothbrush?"

"I don't know; that's a good question."
"No kidding. I'd check in the bathroom though. That is generally where you leave it."
"Right. Brilliant idea, as usual."

Lily held her breath as Sirius walked into the bathroom. She could see his legs from under the shower curtain. He was humming under his breath something that sounded suspiciously like the Beatles. She had to clamp her hand over her mouth to keep from bursting out in laughter.

"James, are you going to pack?"

"I am packing."

"Prongs, if lying on your bed staring dreamily at the ceiling is packing, then my name's Peter," Sirius called from the bathroom where Lily could hear him rummaging around.

There were a few moments of silence, "Ok, I might have been."

"Just out of curiosity, which part of Lily were you pondering?" Remus asked.

"Yes, do tell," Sirius said finally leaving the bathroom, "We're all so interested in her 3rd eyelash, which is particularly long when compared to her 7th eyelash, although lucky 13 does put up a good fight and...ooff..." There was the sound of a pillow knocking someone in the head.

"Stop making fun of him Sirius; you'd be acting exactly the same way if Ally so much as smiled at you."

Now it was Ally's turn to go red. Lily mouthed, "I told you so," with a grin.

"Good point, Remus," James said, "Besides Sirius, I wasn't thinking about her eyelashes, although she does have particularly nice ones. I was thinking about that lock of hair she has that always falls out from behind her ear and hangs there in front of her face. I swear that thing should be illegal. It's nearly impossible to stand there and not brush it out of her face, and once you've touched her hair, how can you stop? You just want to run you fingers through it and..."

James was cut off by Remus, "Alright, sorry I asked."

Lily grabbed the lock of hair in front of her face and stared at it. This was harder than you'd think since it involved going kind of cross-eyed. It didn't look tantalizing to her. Then again James probably didn't consider his soap to be an aphrodisiac. Ally was imitating Lily pretending to examine a lock of her hair and ponder it. How much longer were these boys going to pack for?

"Hey James, why don't you get up off your lazy butt and get my shampoo from the bathroom."

Lily and Ally exchanged looks of horror. Lily looked down to where the shampoo bottles were clustered on the ledge beside her. Unlike the soap, these were clearly labeled. She could see the one labeled, "Black." She picked it up, feeling betrayed. How could this bottle of shampoo do this to her? She was such a nice person and she never was overly abusive to her shampoo bottles.

James' voice sounded in the bathroom, "I can't believe I'm getting you shampoo for you. Ugh. Where is the blasted thing?"

Lily couldn't rationalize what she did next except to say he would have found them anyways, so why not make it on her own terms. She stuck her hand with the shampoo bottle in it out of the curtain and said, "Here you go."

Ally had fallen to the bottom of the shower and was holding her mouth with both hands to keep her laughter in.

"Thanks," James said and had his fingers on hers when he screamed, "Bloody Hell!" and whipped back the curtain causing Lily to lose her balance and topple right into his arms which drove him back into the sink.

Ally was no longer trying to control her laughter and was literally rolling on the shower floor. Remus and Sirius ran in. Both of them stood dumbfounded in the doorway.

"What in the world are you doing?" James sputtered out as Lily tried to pull away from him amid her hysterical laughter. Finally James managed to get them both upright without Lily's help.

Trying to compose herself Lily managed to get out a few words, "Well...your soap...Ally..." before she just gave up.

Sirius and Remus were both laughing now and Sirius was helping Ally out of the bathtub. They seemed to be getting a kick out of the hand contact that required. Finally, once Lily and Ally had managed to bring their laughter down to occasional giggles, Lily tried to explain again.

"It's your soap," she started pulling the bar from her pocket and waving it in front of him, "It smells so damn good."

James was now looking at her like she was crazy and Ally had dissolved into laughter leaning heavily on Sirius who didn't seem to mind at all.

"What she's trying to say," Ally clarified, "is that your soap makes her go crazy, so we decided to steal it. That way she could get her daily dose of James smell over break."

Lily turned bright red. Leave it to Ally to make her slight, ok major, obsession with James' smell into a major embarrassment.

Of course, if Ally thought Lily was going to let her get away with something like that then she should have thought again, "Yeah, well at least I'm not in denial over my desperate need to make out with Sirius Black." Harsh, yes; good revenge, definitely.

Ally stared at her open mouthed in shock.

Then Sirius said, "Yeah, well at least none of you are in denial about your major desire to make out with Ally McClintock."

Ally's face immediately became one of happy surprise as she turned toward Sirius. Then the two of them got right out in the open with their previously secret desires.

"Get a room," Remus said inching away from them. They didn't appear to be paying him any attention.

Lily turned back to James.

"You like my soap?" He said beginning to smile.

"You smell so good I can hardly think around you," she confessed.

"Is that a good thing?"

"Yes," she whispered right as his lips brushed hers. She expected him to pull her closer as he had last time, but to her surprise he pulled back and settled his forehead on hers.

"If you wanted my soap you could just have asked me."

"Well, it's kind of embarrassing you know to...umm...yeah."

James grinned, "I find it charming. I'm even going to ask my mother what type of soap it is, so I can buy you more of it."

"That would be nice," Lily mumbled burying her nose in his shirt. Then feeling wicked she mumbled, "Sorry, but I really can't give you that lock of my hair."

James blushed clearly realizing that she'd heard his conversation with his friends, "Maybe you could give me a lock of hair with you attached to it."

Lily stuck out her tongue at his suggestive eyebrow raise and spun around. Ally and Sirius had just come up for air, so she took the opportunity to suggest that everyone move into some place roomier.

"And warmer," said Remus, "Who left the window open?"

Lily and Ally both started laughing.

"You know that really horrendous cologne of yours, Sirius?" Lily said.

"I don't have any horrendous cologne," he said paying more attention to the hand that was tangling Ally's hair than Lily's words.

"That's right," Ally said, "You don't anymore, not since I threw it out the window." All of the boys looked at her incredulous. She grinned, and then pulled Sirius out of the room. "I'll bring him back when I'm done with him," She called and then they were gone.

Remus looking decidedly uncomfortable said, "I better umm...go find my...banana, I probably left it on the other side of the castle, so...yeah," and he ran out leaving Lily and James alone.

Lily pulled out of James' arms and walked back into the dormitory. It was even messier now that they'd begun to pack. Lily flopped down on James' bed and took a huge breath, "Mmm..." She felt the bed sink down next to her as James sat on the bed.

"You are so crazy," he mumbled, his mouth close to her ear.

Lily grinned, "I have a confession to make."

"What is it?" He said, running a hand down her back.

"I've been stealing your shirts and sleeping in them since 5th year."

James burst out laughing, "So that's where they've been going. I thought that Sirius had been stealing them." He leaned down and kissed her cheek, "You're welcome to any of my shirts that you want."

"You're so sweet," she said sleepily. His smell was practically lulling her to sleep. Odd, since earlier it had had her begging James for kisses. Well not begging, but still. Where was her willpower? Elsewhere, her mind answered. And isn't that a darn good place for it?

"Take a nap Lils, I've got to pack. I'll wake you up for dinner."

Lily needed no further urging. She was asleep within seconds.

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Hey thanks for reading! If you feel like reviewing I wish you would. If you don't that's ok. I kind of like to assume that more people are reading this than are reviewing it, so you can just fuel that daydream.

Daystar - ching I've now cashed in 20 niffer happy minutes

Jen – aphrodisiac soap is awesome. I hope you enjoyed this chapter!

Luciblue – I do try to comment on most people's reviews. I'm glad someone appreciates it.  I like that too. I just don't think it's plausible for her to fall in love with him in one year.

Siriusforeva – Thanks. Lily is awesome.