iamhollywood: yeah, thats exactly what i was going for. If you notice abrupt changes this chapter...3 weeks have passed since the last one.
Amy: thanks for reading
Regrem Erutaerc: Don't know exactly what you mean...but there is more BB/Raven stuff this chapter...I'm trying not to go to overboard cause too much "mush" is a little OOC for Raven (and not exactly my style...lol)
given-inside: yeah great bands (I'm going to see seventh day slumber this sunday (Feb 27th)...and I threw a Hawk Nelson line in this one too...
ravenfairie: yeah I know it took a while, but here it is finally...more will follow, but it's gonna take a little time (I've spent every last ounce of my free time on this chapter since my last post)
NOTES: This chapter was a lot of fun to write. It took some time, but I like how it turned out...Raven actually shows some emotion this time around, but trust me when I say it's definitely in character
Chapter Six: Mind Games
Beast Boy stared at her blankly, "I know it's been a while, but it's hard to get away. They'd probly kill me if they knew I was here, Raven especially. She still thinks 'letting go' means I can't talk to you anymore." He sat down on the cold stone floor of the cave, "They just don't understand I guess." He paused a minute and collected his thoughts, "That's not the point. I came to tell you that I'm moving on. I know…I promised I'd never forget you…and I won't…but I never said I was gonna wait for you. I can't. We're tryin to bring you back, I swear! But nobody knows how long it's gonna take. And…all this waiting is killin me…" He stared up into her eyes, "So I guess, for now at least, this is…goodbye…"
It had been three weeks since Beast Boy finally decided to let go, and Raven could sense that the atmosphere in the Tower was finally returning to normal. The Titans were gathered in the living room just like every other day. Robin, Cyborg, and Beast Boy were clumped together on the couch arguing over the video game controllers, and Starfire was sitting near by, smiling as usual. Raven sat off to the side with her head buried in a book. But unlike every other day in her life, Raven's eyes hovered above the page. They were focused on the green hero sitting across the room.
As hard as she tried, Raven couldn't keep her eyes off him; she had started to see Beast Boy in a different light. She did her best to deny it, but ever since the day she woke up in the hospital, Raven could feel some sort of connection between them. She would never openly admit it but she…"No! Raven don't!" She blinked and quickly returned her gaze to the book in her hands.
Beast Boy glanced sideways at Raven sitting alone across the room. She was still a mystery to him, and to everyone. Even after all this time, the other Titans still knew little about who she really was. Starfire seemed to be the only one that could break the barrier, but Beast Boy had always figured that was just a girl thing. He watched Raven for a moment out of the corner of his eye, but quickly looked back to the TV because he could almost feel her watching him from behind the book.
Beast Boy finally focused on the TV only to find that Cyborg had beaten him, again. Robin reached over and snatched the controller away before he had a chance to react, "Time's up, Beast Boy." Beast Boy slumped over, "Oh man, not fair!" Cyborg grinned, "Don't worry BB, Robin will lose, and you can have it right back." Robin glared at him, and Starfire giggled quietly. Raven rolled her eyes behind the book. "I almost miss the quiet," she thought.
Beast Boy got off the couch and rubbed his stomach, "I don't know about you guys, but I'm hungry." He opened the fridge and looked around for a moment hoping to find something to satisfy his vegetarian appetite. "Man, there is nothing here." He walked over to the counter and picked up the phone, "I think I'm gonna order some…" Cyborg's head flew up as he cut him off, "Pizza!"
While Cyborg's head was turned, Robin dealt the final blow, "Game over Cyborg," he said with a smile. Cyborg growled as he stood up and tossed the controller on the couch. "Whatever. I'm with BB, let's get some food."
Raven shook her head, "Is that all you two ever think about?" Beast Boy grinned, "Usually." He picked up the phone and paused, "Dude, I got an idea. Movie night! Me and Cyborg can go get the pizza and pick up a movie…" Cyborg nodded, "Sounds like a plan."
"Glorious! This will be such fun!"
An hour later, Beast Boy and Cyborg returned with pizza and a stack of movies. Raven grabbed the first case in the pile, The Shining. "Perfect," she said to herself, "another horror movie." Cyborg grabbed the pizzas and set them on the table in front of the TV. The Titans gathered on the couch and Best Boy put the movie in, "Prepare to be horrified!" Raven rolled her eyes, "I don't do scared…"
Raven jumped slightly as Beast Boy plopped down next to her and elbowed her playfully, "Oh come on Raven, remember what happened last time you said that?" Of course she remembered, they all remembered. Raven folded her arms across her chest, "Let's just watch the movie…"
"Heeere's Johnny!" Starfire jumped and ducked behind Robin, "Why does he wish to harm his family?" Robin laughed quietly, "Shh." Raven almost instinctively reached out and grabbed Beast Boy's arm. Beast Boy turned and stared at her, "Raven…?" Raven let go quickly and glared at him. Beast Boy shrunk back and turned back to the TV.
"That was nothing," Raven thought. "You were just a little scared, that's all. You would have done the same thing no matter who was sitting there…right?" Raven stared at the TV screen, but her mind was focused on other things. "Why does he have that effect on me," She thought. Raven had started to notice that whenever she was around Beast Boy, she was always unsure of the world around her. It seemed like everything suddenly had a double meaning. A simple "hi" from her green friend could leave Raven with an infinite number of mixed emotions.
"GET OVER IT!"
Raven screamed. The TV shut off, and the couch went flying backward throwing all but Raven on the floor. Robin was the first to speak, "Raven, are you ok?" Raven stood up, "I'm fine." She pulled her hood over her head, "I'm going to my room." Raven turned and left her friends behind more confused than ever. No one moved for a moment; then Beast Boy grabbed the remote and turned the TV back on, "So…where were we?" Cyborg and Robin slid the couch back into place, and the four remaining Titans sat down again to finish the movie.
Raven paced around her room frantically, "What was that?" Raven could tell by the look she had received from her friends that it was not part of the movie. Raven sat down on her bed and put her head in her hands, "What is going on!" Suddenly, she looked up and noticed the mirror on her desk. Raven jumped up and went over to the mirror. "Somehow, I know I won't like what's waiting on the other side…"
Raven wandered through the world of her emotional existence looking for possible answers to her inexplicable mental outburst. Suddenly a figure in a red cloak stepped out from the shadows, "Looking for me?" She asked with an evil grin on her face. Raven glared at her, "I figured you had something to do with this…"
As Anger stepped forward and removed her hood, she was joined by a similar figure in a bright green cloak. Raven stared at the newcomer, "Who are you?" The green one returned Raven's cold stare, "Jealousy…Envy…whatever you prefer." Anger smirked, "Either way, you can thank Terra for this one."
Raven looked confused, "What are you talking about?" Envy stepped forward, "Whether you admit it or not, your subconscious has emotion too Rae. You can ignore it all you like, but there's more to your mind than even you could understand." Raven stepped back, "Why would I be jealous of Terra? I don't…"
A pink cloaked Raven stepped forward and cut her off, "Yes you do…you always did," she said smiling, "right from the start." She was joined by yet another Raven dressed in gray, "You were just too scared to admit it…"
Anger pushed the other emotions back as she walked forward, "We're working together for once Rae, and look what we're capable of…"
Raven stepped back, "No…I…I don't…I can't. It's NOT true!" Envy walked forward and placed a hand roughly on Raven's shoulder, "This is Terra's fault Rae. She moved in on your territory. We all know something was happening between you and Beast Boy. Terra ruined that." Raven pushed Envy away, "No, Terra didn't ruing anything…"
Anger moved forward and cut her off, "And then, she betrayed you! Twice! Terra came and stole Beast Boy away. Then, on top of all that, she tried to steal your life! She destroyed everything between you and Beast Boy, and she nearly destroyed the Titans. You were starting to finally trust her, when she turned on you and went to Slade! She broke Beast Boy's heart on more than one occasion. Now, he may never be the same again!" Raven backed up as Anger continued to yell, "You can't hide from it Rae…YOU HATE TERRA! YOU HATE HER FOR STEALING BEAST BOY!"
Raven buried her head in her hands, "No, it's not true. You're lying…IT'S NOT TRUE!"
Anger smiled mischievously, "You can't ignore it forever Raven…" Raven looked up to find herself surrounded by her alter egos. "You'll feel so much better once you open up to it!"
"It's ok to be scared, it's part of life."
Raven curled up within the ring of her emotions. They all spoke over one another, drowning her brain with uncontrollable feelings. Her head was spinning. "They're wrong," she thought, "all wrong…" Raven closed her eyes as Anger stepped out of the ring and stood behind her whispering in her ear, "How can we be wrong Rae? We're you!"
"NO!" Raven opened her eyes to find herself back in her room. Her bedroom door had been torn from the wall, andBeast Boy stood in the open doorway with a cautious smile on his face. He looked at Raven and laughed nervously, "Heh, I was gonna ask if you were ok…but I think I'll just go to my room." Raven reached out her hand, "No Beast Boy…I…" He looked back briefly, "What?" Raven shook her head, "Nothing." Beast Boy turned walked to his room. Raven slumped down onto her bed and sighed, "Focus, Raven…Stay in control."She laid back on her pillow and closed her eyes, hoping that a goodnight's sleep would take her away from the nightmare she seemed to be caught in the middle of.
Beast Boy sat on his bed in a daze, "You always manage to show up at just the right time, don't you," he thought. Beast Boy closed his eyes and shook his head, "I don't think I'll ever figure her out..." He reached over and turned on the radio.
"She's been on my mind. She's workin over time…"
Beast Boy smirked, "Heh, you could say that again…" He closed his eyes and turned the radio off, then slowly drifted off to sleep.
Ok, well that's chapter six...like I said, I really liked writing this chapter...hopefully you liked reading it.
more is on the way, but again, it's gonna be a while in the making (these later chapters are starting to get a little more challenging.