(A/N: it is 11:26 pm, and I just finished this little piece.. I have no clue as to why I'm postin it, but I am very bored right now. Blame this on boredom and insomnia! Hehe and hyperness, lol.. well hope you like it, the 'poem' is © mee! (DarkAngelKat, aka Katie Gibson) So even though I know no one is actually gonna read this much less enjoy it, lmao…. don't take it! )
Sakura fumbled with the pan in her hand waiting for the teacher to call her up to turn in her assignment. They were supposed to write about something they were afraid to lose, or that they had lost/were losing, and how they would cope with it.
Sensri hadsaid "write anything, a narrative, poetry, prose, or even just jot down your thoughts." So Sakura did.
She figured it was more of an orderly thought-jot than anything else.. It had no rhythm or anything. 'Oh well, I did what she asked me to.'
Suddenly Shaoran appeared and took her paper, placing it on a stack of others' papers. "Sensei had me collect them… Can I read it?" Sakura blushed slightly, then nodded her head. Shaoran read it.
Control
Why is it that I've lost control?
Things used to be so simple,
I used to decide my own feelings, my thoughts.
Now they are all jumbled together
And I do not even recognize them as mine.
Why is it that, for some strange reason,
I like being this way; I don't want to change,
But I keep trying to suppress what I feel.
Maybe I just don't want to accept it,
This loss of control.
Or maybe I don't trust myself, maybe
I need to learn that I can trust my instincts
Even if they are telling me many different things.
My instincts have saved me more than once,
So why do I keep ignoring them? Why?
I am afraid, maybe that's why. Very afraid.
Afraid of messing things up, of losing my happiness.
I wish the fear would leave me be.
It should just disappear; I wish I could control it.
But I can't, and I never will be able to.
I must face the facts now.
I have lost it, and I will never get it back.
I am going to miss it, but maybe,
Just maybe, I am better off without it.
Without my control.
Shaoran looked up at Sakura wordlessly for some time. "Y-you wrote this? Wow.. its really good!" Sakura blushed and muttered a thank-you.
Shaoran thought for a while before speaking. "We are more alike than I thought."
He scribbled something on an extra sheet of paper and put it on her desk, before walking away to collect the rest of the papers.
Sakura looked down at the note he had written her. "Meet me at the park with the swings after school. You know where it is!"
She looked up and caught him smiling at her. Maybe losing control wasn't such a bad thing after all…..
(A/N: I went to fictionpress-dot-com to upload a story, and saw this collecting dust there, so I made it a short little fic… I know, the 'thought-jot' and the fic both suck, but it kinda hit me, and when something hits me I listen!)
DAK