Disclaimer: Don't, won't, I wish.

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Sorry, I know, it took forever... . To all reviewers-you are amazing! Thank you! (Individual awards will be handed out later.)

A few notes on characterizations: I am exaggerating everyone's traits-Robin is obsessive and vain (you would be too, if you were raised by someone as disturbed as Batman.) Starfire is naive, not stupid-and painfully cheerful.(In this story, stupid suffices, however.) Cyborg is moody and resentful of the fact that he is a freak(.Therefore he is too normal and serious a character, so I generallyneglect him.) Beastboy is a childish nitwit.(But cute and lots of fun to pick on.)

To anyone who has noted that I mixed-up DC and Marvel characters (and CN originals,) I am not a retard-I just don't care what you think! Re-read the story carefully, and you will discover that it is meant to be humorous... Vin.

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On with the fun...

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A-S- S-A-G-E- O- F -T -I- M- E-

Flight home uneventful. Starefire still thinking 'Candyland' thoughts.

Went to my room for awhile. Cyborg headed straight to the refrigerator, of course.

Robin said he was going to train.

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Thought: 'Dammit-who the hell does Raven think she is, starting without me? Must kick the crap out of something...'

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Starefire knocked on my door.

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Starfire: "Ummm, Raven-would you consent to talk to me now-"

Thought: '...thought you were my friend, bitch.'

Starfire: "...about friend Robin and the kissing?"

Thought: '...and explain why you want me to examine your underwear?'

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Me: "Yeah-whatever."

Thought: '-so you still didn't figure that one out, eh, Sherlock?'

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Starefire: "I am afraid that Robin may never ask me to perform the kissing. He always makes excuses whenever we seem to

be getting-uh-close?"

Thought: 'I am so freakin' horny! I wonder if friend Cyborg has a penis?'

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Me: "Ummmmmmmmm..."

Thought: 'Whoa-shit-didn't see that coming...'

Me: "Uhhh-I think you're just going to have to initiate 'the kissing' yourself, Star. Robin is kinda shy, I think."

Thought: "Or gay-or stuck on himself-or obsessive or..."

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Starfire: "?" (blank stare)

Thought: 'blank stare.'

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Me: 'Next time you feel-uh-'close,' just put your lips on his…"

Thought: 'do I really have to draw you a picture?'

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Starfire: "Like this?"

Thought: 'I like her, too-and she said just do it…"

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Suddenly, Starfire grabbed the back of my head and kissed me!

My thought: 'Ahhhh! My room is a freakin' mess!'

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Starfire: "friend Raven? Is that what they mean in the movie pictures, when they say 'the Earth moved?'

Thought: 'hee hee. That was fun!'

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Me: "Star, please don't ever do that again."

Thought: '-before we go to someplace safe, like the moon, where I can fuck your brains out.'

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Starfire pouted: "Was I not a good kiss for you?"

Thought: 'What were we talking about…?'

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Me: "No-It's not that, Star. I-just think that Robin and you have kind of been a pair for awhile, now. I think you owe it to

him to give him a chance…"

Thought: 'It's for the good of the team-right? He would flip out, losing his girlfriend to me…'

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Starfire: "Oh, I see, Raven. I shall talk to Robin, and see if he is wishing to kiss with me."

Thought: '-so confusing-pink, fluffy bunnies-pink, flu-oh! Raven was soooo cute when she was a bunny! No-must

concentrate on Robbie, my Pooh. Sigh-I am so confused…'

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Don't worry-there is more fun in store-I am just cleaning it up...

Reviewing-Just Do It!

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