Kirika: We don't own Yu-Gi-Oh or Pokemon!
Julia: Due to a death-threat from Redemmo, we've decided to change the order of our story a little bit.
Danny: Yeah, we're doing the Bakura chapter first. Oh, and by the way, the Commentary Guy is invisible to everyone but W.E.I.R.D.
Kida: Read and Review!
Chapter Four
Recruiting a Deranged Psychopath
Bakura: Mwahahaha! The Earth shall soon be mine!
The grave robber stood outside the Ishtar residence, laughing gleefully. A man came out to investigate, and was shocked when he came face to face with an old friend.
Marik: Bakura? Why are you standing outside my house laughing for no reason in particular?
Bakura: Hehehe… Marik… are you interested in taking over the world?
Marik: looks at him oddly What is your problem, Bakura? You know that I'm not interested in that anymore…
Bakura: Ha! Tell me honestly Marik; did you really force your Rare Hunters to disband?
Marik: looks sheepish Of course…
Bakura: snapping I said be honest!
Marik: You don't even know the meaning of honesty!
Bakura: Humph… foolish mortal…
Marik: groaning Get a new catch phrase you broken record.
Bakura: Mwahahaha, it's take over time!
Marik: slaps a hand to his forehead 'Mwahahaha, it's take over time'? That's LAME! So, what pathetic plan have you got this time?
Bakura: I've joined forces with a gang of demented girls who've convinced me that they're going to help me take over the world.
Marik: WHAT! That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard!
Bakura: shrugs You haven't heard Kitana speak.
Marik: Who?
Bakura: One of the gang.
Marik: Oh.
Bakura: looks confused Where'd that come from?
Marik: What?
Bakura: points That!
Marik: turns around
Bakura: knocks him out
Marik: as he's falling You'll pay for this…
Bakura: Hahaha! I can't believe you fell for that! Now to get you back to that damn hideout… drags Marik to his motorbike and looks at it confused how do you use these things? sits on it Okay… AAAAAAAARRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!
The insane grave robber sped into the distance, cackling as he rode. He reached the Warehouse of W.E.I.R.D. (he'd called ahead to inform Kida that he was coming) to find that Kaiba was strapped to a chair and the same had been done to Wheeler. Kida and Kitana were reciting a strange chant…
Kitana: Prepare for double!
Kida: That's trouble you moron!
Kitana: Oh yeah! Whoops!
Kida: sighs Take 58…
Kitana: Prepare for trouble!
Kida: Make it double!
Kitana: To rid the world of gravitation!
Kida: What?
Kitana: beaming If we rid the world of gravitation, we'll be able to go to outer space! laughs in a deranged manner
Kida: bangs head There's no oxygen in outer space you idiot…
Joey: whining We've been listenin' ta dis garbage for de last two hours, but ya still get it wrong evra time! Just let us go ya punks!
Kida: Argh… spots Bakura Oh, you're back!
Kitana: Yay!
Bakura: Humph… I've got the foolish mortal… throws Marik of the motorbike
Kitana: Double yay! We rule!
Kida: I wonder what's taking the others so long…
Marik: wakes up Give me my Rod! sits up Uhh… looks around and sees Bakura I'm going to kill you!
Bakura: smirks Haha… you still want to take over the world… admit it…
Marik: hangs head in shame
Kitana: Hey, it's okay Marik! World Domination is fun!
Kida: Yeah, we're not evil, we're just… weird.
Marik: And you two are…?
Kida: I'm Kida.
Kitana: I'm Kitana, I'm Kitana, I'm Kitana, I'm Kitana…
Kida: Why did you just say that four times?
Kitana: I never tire of my own voice!
Marik: sweat drop I see what you mean about stupid speech…
Bakura: What needs to be done?
Joey: I can't believe dat you're involved in this!
Kida: Before Marik runs away, we need to tie him down on one of those chairs…
Bakura: ties a very depressed Marik down to a chair
Kitana: Now we have to bribe you all!
Joey: I ain't accepding anyding yer gonna offer me ya got dat?
Kitana: pouts
Seto: laughing There is NOTHING that you can offer me!
Kida: In that case, we'll just have to blackmail you instead.
Seto: stops laughing
Kida: I knew that would shut him up!
Kitana: gives Kida a death glare
Bakura: rolls eyes Get on with it…
Kida: goes over to Joey and hold a card in front of him Joey Wheeler, have you ever seen THIS card before?
Joey: It's too close ta my eyes for me ta see it…
Kida: steps back
Joey: gasps What is dat?
Kitana: smugly The Red-Eyes Darkness Dragon!
Joey: No way! I want it!
Kida: Sure, it's yours! If…
Joey: If I help ya take ova da world, right?
Kitana: Uh huh.
Joey: No way! I helped Yug' save da world, I'm not about to turn ma back on dat now! Not for one card!
Kida: Ah, but how about for this card AND a year's supply of noodles?
Joey: Nooooo! I will never surrender!
Kitana: How about the noodles, the card, AND a leash?
Joey: scowls Why de heck would I agree ta dat?
Seto: laughs
Kida: Fine, forget the leash. How about the card, the noodles and… help with your Math Homework?
Joey: Argh, no one can help me with ma Math…
Kitana: Kida can! She's the best girl at Math!
Seto: But she's not the best, is she?
Kida: Damn that guy!
Bakura: What guy? Kaiba?
Kitana: No, not Seto! The dude who can beat her at Math you duh-brain!
Bakura: What is this 'Math' anyway? Is it a weapon?
Kitana: Well… it DOES drive some people into hysteria and it IS known as a big killer points at the sobbing Joey You see? He's completely horrified by the subject!
Joey: sniff Algebra! sniff
Kida: pats him gently There there, I can help… do we have a deal…? You know, if you help us take over the world, you'll be doing yourself and all of your friends a BIG favour… the only people who'll go to school are the ones who want to, and everyone else can relax… besides, if you take over the world, you can rid it of evil people, and make it a better place… isn't that what you want Joey?
Joey: sniff Yer…
Kida: secretly hi-fives Kitana
Kitana: Now, Seto!
Seto: glares
Kitana: whispers We can help you beat Yugi…
Seto: I don't need or want your help! I can beat Yugi on my own terms, do you understand?
Kitana: Seto, you just lost Battle City like, three weeks ago, but fine, let's make a deal…
Seto: Oh? And just WHAT did you have in mind?
Kitana: checks watch Listen Seto. As we speak, someone is challenging the World Champion of Duel Monsters, Yugi Motou, to a duel.
Seto: And?
Joey: Is dat supposed ta mean summat?
Marik: Whom exactly are we talking about anyway?
Kitana: smirking That would be Kirika –
Kida: - One of W.E.I.R.D.
Kitana: A very valuable member –
Kida: - Who's gonna kick Yugi's butt.
Kitana: Tell you what Seto. If Kirika beats Yugi, you join us. If she doesn't, we'll let you go, AND, we'll give you the Spell Cards Raigeki, Dark Hole, Change of Heart, Creature Swap and Axe of Despair. Deal?
Seto: Huh, fine, why not? No one can beat Yugi except for me. Once their idiotic friend loses, I'll be able to walk away with some of the most powerful Spell Cards in all of Duel Monsters.
Kida: Cool! Go Kirika!
Kitana: And as for you Marik…
Bakura: If you don't join us, I'll inform your sister that your Rare Hunters are still about…
Marik: Fine… I'll work with you freaks…
Kitana: Hey! Who are you calling a freak, you Sandshrew!
Joey and Kida: burst out laughing
Seto, Bakura and Marik: look confused
Kitana: Hnn… what's the point of insulting someone when they don't even understand you? Argh!
Bakura: Your friend had better win.
Kida: Don't worry, she will.
Kitana: You know, I'd better let Danny know it's time for her to execute her part of the plan… picks up her phone and dials a number
Danny: Hi! Okay Kitana, have you got the others yet?
Kitana: Oh yeah, you bet we have! We just need you to –
Danny: Yeah, don't worry, I know. I'm on Duellist Kingdom right now.
Kitana: Cool! Go for it!
Danny: Don't worry, I won't mess up! Bye! hangs up
Kitana: Wow, we're so close…
Seto: Shut up.
Kitana: What? Why?
Kida: You're annoying…?
Kitana: Huh, fine then, I'll shut up.
Kida: Or we could try to come up with a motto…
Bakura: Do that, and I'll kill you all!
Kida: Geez, you're a REAL team player Bakura!
Bakura: smirks
Julia: Wow, our plan rocks!
Kida: Of course it does, we're W.E.I.R.D.!
Kitana: Sorry that we didn't update for so long but we've been –
Danny: - Hungry.
Kirika: - Sick.
Julia: - Busy.
Kida: - Watching T.V.
Kitana: Yeah, all of the above! Review!