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Reflection of the Moon

Lake • Sapphire Lake

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"Come on, Yuki, hand me that suitcase," I said impatiently, as I tried the nth time to make Yuki hand me his luggage. Even though the suitcase was not that big and heavy, somehow it seemed to me that Yuki might be crushed under it any moment. Of course I was not going to say that. He would just say that I worry too much, or maybe that I had a "Yuki complex".

I won't really object to that idea, though.

"I really can do it myself, To-ya. I've already troubled you enough by tagging along on this family trip," he apologized as if he had done something so terrible that could not be forgiven. That was also the nth time I had heard that apology.

"If you insist on clutching to your dear suitcase, then I'll carry the both of you and dump you in the trunk."

Yuki giggled, but hugged his suitcase even tighter and made a face. "I'd like to see you try."

I was just going for him, when Sakura yelled, "Oniichan! Yukito-san! Hurry up! We're leaving soon!"

Making use of the distraction, I snatched away the suitcase and walked towards the car. Yuki made a small sound of protest, but followed along. I gave a sign of disappointment inwardly. I had lost another chance to get close to Yuki. That seemed to happen very often nowadays, and I wonder if it was just plain bad luck, or someone e out there was purposely arranging this. Maybe I would get better luck and more chances during this trip, and whoever that person was, I hoped that he/she wouldn't follow so far.

I admit that I like Yuki. Well, it as difficult to not like him, I mean, with his large and innocent amber eyes, soft fine hair, the true smiles . . . Enough of that. Yuki was perfection, because he was not human. I had known it the first time I saw him. His power was practically shining brighter than the sun, and I thought that he was, perhaps, an angel in disguise.

His past and memories were not real, his grandparents not real, and perhaps his looks were not even real. But his smile would always be, and the comfort that he brought me just by being near me also was real. His perfection might be his greatest flaw, but I would still love him, even if I was not sure if he was capable of feelings, but as long as he was beside me, then everything else did not matter.

"To-ya, stop staring, we have to go now!" Yuki said and waved his pale hand before my face.

"I know, I know," I said and ruffled his hair. He giggled once again, full of honest joy, and my heart melted at that sound.

See, I told you, as long as he was beside me, everything was fine.

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"Come on, Yuki, I'll show you to a place," Touya said after they had finished arranging their things. The room wasn't really big, but had a cozy feeling to it. Two single beds were in the room, separated by a set of drawers. Touya silently wished that the drawers weren't there, and he could just push the beds together.

"But it's so late now, and all dark outside. Are we allowed to go out this late?" Yukito asked worriedly.

Touya just rolled his eyes and said, "I'm going anyway. You can choose to come or just stay here." He put on a jacket and slid into his shoes. Yukito hesitated a little, then changed from his fuzzy slippers to a pair of sandals. They moved quietly through the cottage, and Touya did a double check to make sure they didn't disturb anything (Sakura, stuffed toy, father, spirits, etc.).

"Where are we going, To-ya?" Yukito asked once they were outside.

Touya didn't answer and walked straight into he woods, motioning Yukito to follow. Yukito broke into a little jog to keep up, then reached out to hold Touya's hand. It was an oddly naïve thing he often did, and though he thought nothing of it, it always made Touya have a sudden impulse to hug him. Instead, Touya just squeezed his hand a little tighter.

"Have you come here before? You seem quiet familiar with the forest."

"I came her once when I was four years old, with my father and mother."

"And you still remember the way? You have such a good memory, To-ya." Touya didn't even need to turn to see the smile on Yukito's face. He had it long memorized in his mind.

Soon, they came to a clearing and a vast cobalt surface of lake stretched out in front of them. A bright full moon hang I the sky and a golden reflection floated in the lake. The air was still but cool, so not even a single ripple was created to break up the liquid mirror. A light layer of mist covered the ground, giving everything a touch of mystery and fragility.

"Oh, it's so beautiful, To-ya," Yukito sighed and unconsciously changed his hold on Touya's hand to latching onto his arm.

Touya looked at Yukito, whose eyes still seemed dazed by the wonderful sight and gently smile graces his lips. The silvery moonbeams were cast onto his face, making his pale complexion glow like pearls. To Touya, he was more beautiful than anything in the world.

They sat down by the edge of the pond, on the dew-covered grass.

"I came to this lake with my mother before, on a night just like this thirteen years ago. I had a dream about the exact events that happened on that night a few days ago, so I decided to bring you here. Do you like it?"

"I love it! But I'm sorry that your mother can't be here. She must be a much better company than me."

"Don't apologize for something which you are not wrong for, silly. Besides," Touya turned and pretended to find the trees interesting, "I would still have come with you if she was still alive." Yukito grinned at his friend's embarrassment and sat a bit closer.

They sat in comfortable silence, when suddenly, Yukito said softly, "There are two moons."

Touya nodded in agreement. "I used to want the moon, but every time I reach out for the reflection, it breaks. My mother said that only the real moon can be touched, but it is so high up in the sky, and it always has a side that I can't see."

"So do you still want the moon now?"

"Yes, but not the moon in the sky anymore, nor the reflection. I want the moon on earth."

"The moon on earth?"

"The moon that only I can see; the moon that is only special to me; the moon that only belongs to me. And because the moon is the moon, I will definitely like it." Touya said and smiled at the slightly thoughtful expression on Yukito's face.

"The moon is a person, isn't it? Have you found her?"

"You are only half correct, so yes, I have found that person, but no, I have not found her." Yukito looked confused. "Don't worry about it now. Just enjoy the scenery."

Yukito didn't listen, but continued, "Have you reached you moon, then?"

Touya looked at him. A small frown was on his forehead, and his large amber eyes seemed like a deep pool of honey. Touya would have drowned himself in the deep sweetness if not for the mixture of hurt and fear that shone in them. Yukito looked away, as if he didn't or couldn't bear to hear the answer. Bring up his hand, Touya gently ran his fingers through the silken strands of Yukito's hair, then down to his cheek, directing Yukito so that they were facing each other again.

"I have been trying, but still haven't reached it. Yuki . . . I . . . you" Just then, a few birds decided to take a flight, the soft flapping of their wings seemed like thunderous noise, cutting through the silent night. The mood was shattered.

"What were you saying, To-ya?" Yukito turned back after the distraction was gone. He smiled up sweetly, just as he normally did, as if nothing had ever happened, and the hurt and fear had never appeared in his eyes.

"Nothing." Touya said with a hint of sadness and exasperation Yukito did not pick up.

Touya stared at the moon in the sky, while Yukito gazed at the moon in the water, both wrapped up in their own thoughts.

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The discomfort in my chest hadn't fade. Although it was not as intense as just now, it had became a shadow, always there. It was light, but would never disappear, and never be ignored, as much as I tried.

I didn't know why. To-ya had only told me that he hand found the person most special to him, and as a friend, I should be glade for him. Instead, I felt my breath suddenly caught in the throat, and then a strange wave of emotions washed over me. They were not pleasant emotions, and somehow, I felt scared.

Since To-ya had found that person, then he would definitely reach that person someday. Then would he leave me?

No, I'm sure he would not. We were the best friends.

Then why did the feeling of being abandoned still didn't leave me? Why did I feel betrayed? To-ya had to find his most special person someday . . . But why did it have to be so soon?

I didn't even dare to ask who that person was. I did not want to pry. But mostly, I did not think I could bear t lean that name, the person who would be taking To-ya away. I did not want to detest others. I didn't think that I could, but now . . .

I was feeling a sense of loss, for something I wasn't even sure I had.

I had so many questions. I stared at the reflection of the moon. Could it give me some answers?

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Time passed as if it never existed. I did not know how much time had passed. Nothing moved; nothing changed.

Until I felt a weight on my shoulder. Yuki had fallen asleep. I looked at his sleeping face, no less innocent than when he was awake. I wrapped an arm around his shoulders, pulling him closer. A gentle breeze brought a chill, and he buried his head deeper into the curve of my neck, murmuring something incoherent.

Maybe tomorrow would be a better day to confess. For now, I just wanted to savour the warmth of Yuki beside me.

I looked up to see the moon, same as it was years ago, the time having on effect on it.

"I have finally found my moon. I will definitely reach it someday."

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