Sorry for not updating so long, but I was busy working on another short fic and it took me longer than I expected (because it's lemon), and I hope you like this chapter. The climax is over, anyway, so now it will be less depressing. But I don't mean not depressing. Get the idea? Anyway, give more reviews!!! I'm not getting enough!

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Reflection of the Moon

Mirrors • Amethyst Mirrors

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Yukito finally opened his eyes, and I saw through is dazed sight that we were in a hospital. Not surprising. Numerous tubes were stuck into my, no, Yukito's arms, and I could feel the heavy bandage on his chest with each rise and fall of this somewhat laboured breathing. His whole body was sore, and I could feel it just like I could feel myself, though I could have chosen not to. But recently, I had taken up a want, to feel what it was like in the real world, so I had often took down that barrier which separated our physical connections. I didn't know why I wanted this, nor when had this started, but the desire was getting stronger.

The door clicked open, and turning his head (which proved to be difficult), I saw, through Yukito, that it was Touya. He strode over quickly, wearing an anxious and worried expression, and took hold of Yukito's right hand. "How are you feeling?"

Lethargic. Sore. As sick as I had ever felt. "I feel find, To-ya," and Yukito smiled, painstakingly so.

"I'm sorry, Yuki, I'm so sorry," Touya started immediately, lifting Yukito's hand to his face, " I should have been there earlier, then you would not have . . . I have no excuse to not have sensed that you were in danger, and I couldn't even protect you. how could I have been so selfish, to only notice what was around me, and get distracted by a few silly remarks?! How ---"

"To-ya," Yukito cut him off gently, "it's not your fault. Don't worry, I'll be fine."

I chuckled bitterly and humorlessly to myself. Fine, as in we would probably disappear in the next few days. Such as grand white lie. But what else could he say? Could I say?

"Yuki," Touya's expression suddenly turned serious, and his eyes bored so deeply into Yukito that for one second, I could feel his gaze on me. I started, and tired to turn away, only finding myself unable to move anymore under his intense gaze. "Yuki, there's something I've meant to tell you a long time ago. Perhaps you think that I don't know, well, perhaps you haven't even discovered that yourself, that . . ." My heart started fluttering rapidly, in time to Yukito's, and for the first time in hundreds of years, I was nervous. Scared.

" . . . I know you are not human, so you don't have to hide anymore." He smiled, and I knew he was talking to me. To me, and not works that I can hear, just within my reach but designated to Yukito.

I closed my eyes and felt a strong pull, and when I opened them again, I was looking at Touya directly, with no Yukito in between. Suddenly, I felt vulnerable, naked, almost, with nothing to hide behind, because Touya was staring at me with a look of silent acknowledgement. No smiles, no jokes, no touching. I still wasn't Yukito after all. "Touya . . ."

"We have finally met. What's your name?"

A spasm of pain shot through my heart. It only occurred to me then that to him, I was a complete stranger. No matter how long I had watched him, my presence was nothing but that glowing layer of power encasing Yukito, and even more vague in his mind than a shadow. At least a shadow still had a shape.

"Yue." The name sounded foreign to my own ears. "Yukito just doesn't want you to know that he's not human, but a false form of me, because to Yukito, you are a very special person. Also, he doesn't want to hurt you by letting you know the truth, for then, you will surely give al your power to me. He doesn't want to take this away from you."

Cobalt eyes fixed on me, serous and thoughtful, and I wondered what he saw. The person who shared Yukito's body? The cause of all these troubles? The one to take his magic away form him? If so, then I wished he'd never cast his eyes upon me at all. I didn't want to feel weak. I didn't want to be the third person even when I was back in my original form, not hiding behind Yukito.

Finally, Touya spoke up. "Yuki should have known that it would hurt me even more if he were to disappear. If my powers are enough to sustain him, then I will give them all to you, but I want to protect Sakura too."

"Even if you don't say that, I will also protect Mistress with all I have."

"But I will also be a pain if you were to really do that. Promise me, that aside from protecting Sakura, you have to protect yourself too," and my heart started beating a little faster at that. Was he really worried about me? "Because if you were to disappear, then Yuki will too."

A bitter smile lifted my lips. Why did I even bother to hope? I gently landed on the ground. It had become tiring even to fly.

"I'm sorry," I said and could feel a tinge of bitterness leaking into my works. "When Yukito was attacked, I should have tired sending some powers to him so that he could at least protect himself."

"What, and use up all your remaining powers and vanish even before I could reach him?" he smiled. " I don't blame you, Yue. You just wanted Yuki to be able to survive just a bit longer. You don't want to disappear too."

"I don't care. Perhaps disappearing would be better; there's nothing left here for me."

"You two really are alike, you and Yuki. Both can be as stubborn as a donkey when you put your minds on something," he grinned mischievously at me. I opened my mouth to retort, only then discovering that he had been teasing me. Like the way he did with Yukito.

"I am not look him," I muttered under my breath, and he grinned even wider. Enough of jokes.

Taking a deep breath, I took a step towards him and looked him straight in the eyes. "Are you sure about his?"

Gently cupping the side of my face, he said in a tone both firm and soft, "Why won't I be?"

Placing my hands on his shoulders, I leaned in, until I could smell his scent, feel the warmth he was emitting, and the steady, strong pulse in which his magic flows. Then his heartbeat grew faster, echoing my own, and I quickly placed my lips o the pulsed in his neck, afraid that he could hear my nervousness through my erratic heartbeat.

His skin seemed like fire against my cold lips, and from there, the liquid fire of his magic pored into me, down my throat, warming my abdomen, spreading through my limbs until my fingers were no longer numb form the cold. He was my warmth, and gave me life just as much as Clow did.

I was drinking up his life; I would always have part of him with me.

But as soon as this started, it ended, and he fell limp into my arms. Magic vibrated through me, and I no longer felt tired or sick, and even the injuries sustained by Yukito were healed. Yet somehow, I felt uneasy looking at the unconscious Touya in my lap. Guilt, wasn't it? Grazing my fingers lightly over his face, I wondered if I should say "sorry" or "thank you"; if I should smiled or break down into pieces.

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I blinked open my eyes and felt a weight on my lap.

"To-ya!" I gasped, "To-ya, wake up." Shaking him gently, I thought that he had fallen asleep while visiting me. But why was I sitting on the ground, or the fact that I wasn't tired at all? . . .No! Pressing my hand to my chest, I found no bandages there, not even a scar. So was my thigh, my face . . . I was feeling better than I had ever been over the last few weeks. No . . . it meant that . . .

I turned to the unconscious To-ya, and a thought struck me. What if he could never wake up anymore? What if he could never be what he was anymore? Fear gripped my heart, and so did guilt, sorrow, regret . . .

"To-ya . . . wake up . . ." I murmured as I quickly leaned down, pressing my ear against his chest. He was still alive. I shook him, once, twice, as if that was the only thing I could do. My thoughts were frozen, numb, and my movement mechanical, my eyes staring straight at To-ya's closed eyelids. He wouldn't wake up . . . no matter how I tried . . . he wouldn't . . .

Why was I so useless? Why couldn't even get enough magic myself? And now, To-ya . . . To-ya was . . . all because of me . . .

Then, tears flooded my eyes, and I shattered into a million pieces on top of him.

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I managed to drag To-ya home from the hospital, and now, I stood in front of the door, too afraid to even face Sakura. I pressed the doorbell nonetheless. The door swung open.

"Ah! Konichiwa! Yukito-sa---- What happened to Oniichan?!" Her bright smile vanished, replaced by anxiety, and I carried To-ya to his room and tucked him into bed with her help. I smiled at her all the way, saying that To-ya had only fallen asleep while visiting me, so I carried him back. I never knew that it was so painful to smile.

She tried to seem content, but her eyes still betrayed her worry, and suddenly, I felt that I shouldn't be there. I was the cause of To-ya being in this state, and I could still stand shamelessly in front of his sister, lying.

"Sakura-chan, I have to go replace To-ya on one of his jobs now. Tell me when he wakes up!" Squeezing out one last smile, I rushed down the stairs without waiting for her response. The smile slipped off my lips, as I ran towards the door like a suffocating man reaching for oxygen. Then I was out of there. And I ran, and ran, and ran, until I could move no more.

Then, rain fell from the sky, and I melted away with it.

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All these years I had drowned myself in sorrow, I thought that my pain had only intensified, never diminishing, and that the wound had not even been healed by a notch by the passing time. Yet I was wrong.

Thinking back to the encounter with Touya today, when he asked for my name, indeed I had felt pain then, and although it was nowhere near the pain I remembered enduring when low died, it felt much more real, as if time had cast a veil on top of what I had felt hundreds of years ago, making what was then excruciating only a dried scab which I could compare present emotions to. Even thought the pain today should be like a pin-prick, it managed to break through that antique layer of memories, reminding me of what real pain was, followed by nervousness, fear, guilt, and that slight fluttering in my heart called joy. Emotions poured into me through that tiny hole the pinprick punctured, and those memories ceased to matter, but also became more painful. And to think all these are because of Touya's one simple question.

Just when did other's words mean so much? Or was it just him?

I admit Touya's presence had always been more significant than others, in a different way than the Mistress. But was this because of Yukito's influence, or that Touya bore resemblance to Clow? Did I really see him as who he was?

The first time I, Yukito, saw him, I thought that he was a stern person, but after a few hours, when he first smiled at me, it was as if the whole hard wall surrounding him melted as easily as that. He didn't smile often, perhaps because he didn't want to lie. Clow always smiled, but his was enigmatic, and I would keep guessing what was the real meaning behind that smile. That was my only entertainment those days, but I had seen Clow again a few days ago, the reincarnated one. His smile hadn't changed, but I was just tired of guessing all over again. I just wanted to know the reason, straight out. Perhaps I had been with Touya for too long.

How ironic, that I had gotten used to frankness, but whenever I appear as myself, I would hide behind an icy layer. No, I couldn't even be sure now, after so long, that if that coldness was false. Somehow, I expected, wanted frankness from others, but couldn't do it myself. Too scared? Timid? Perhaps, though I would never admit it.

Maybe I envied Yukito all along, that he could show his emotions without being afraid that others would use it against him, hurting him back. He was someone I could never be, so drastically different. And Touya had fallen in love with such a person, not me, Yue, even though he said that we were alike. We were not, I knew it, deep down, because Yukito was my fantasy. How could I fantasize myself? It was impossible for Touya to like me.

He, perhaps, like Clow, was also someone I could only watch from a distance, no matter how close we were, and never have.

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