"Robbie, don't." I said. I had this huge fear he was going to tell me he
had feelings for me. I had always kind of been interested in him. I mean,
who wouldn't? He was an amazing person. Always had something to say, and I
had to admit we'd had some pretty awesome debates. Why I was scared? I
wasn't sure. Travis was gone I knew that, I just couldn't let him go.
He looked at me. He had great lips when he smiled.
I couldn't help but smile back.
"I have to." He said.
"No, you don't."
"I like you, so much. When you moved here you brought this amazing energy. And I think you made us all happier. I mean Lily now has that one girl friend that she can be with, and I think because of that she was a little less uptight about ray. Travis fell in love with you. And me? From the moment I met you, I've wanted to say this. Things should not be weird between us. If your still not over Travis, that's ok. But, I couldn't keep it in any longer." And he sighed.
I didn't know what to say. I half expected this from Robbie. From the time I got more attached into the group and felt welcome Robbie was the one who was always making sure I was ok. He was the one who I knew I could talk to. Yeah, sure I had Lily but wed been friends since we were two. Robbie was this new person who I felt I could completely open myself up to and he wouldn't try to fix it, he wouldn't try to understand. He just would, by listing.
Why was this happening?
"Robbie, I don't know what to say."
"Then don't say anything. Just promise this wont make things weird ok?"
I took a deep breath.
I looked at him and I could tell he was hurt. I couldn't stand it.
"I promise."
He smiled a nervous smile and let out a breath. I smiled back to return his feeling of nervousness.
**** Ray and Lily sat in Mickey's. Lily was drinking a hot chocolate while Ray was picking at a sandwich. She was talking about a new band she was really interested in and a new song she was thinking about writing. He was looking around Mickey's at the new stuff Mickey had put up, at the people, at a girl.
"Ray!" Lily said trying to get his attention.
"Huh?" he said looking at her.
"Your not listing."
"I'm sorry Lil, its. hey lets do something fun tonight."
"Like what?"
"I don't know, its summer, were going to be seniors in high school, lets do something. dramatic."
Lily smiled. "And what qualifies as dramatic."
He thought. "We could drive out to the coast?"
"Eh."
"Yeah, lets drive out to the coast, just you and me, some candles and. some food."
She raised an eyebrow. "Just you and me." She liked that.
****
"And what are you planning on doing with this boy at the beach?" I exclaimed after she had told me her plans.
She smiled at me. She collapsed onto her bed. "I want to Meg. I do really. But I'm scared."
I raised an eyebrow at her. I began to remember the night Travis and I had spent together. It was amazing. Time seemed to stand still when I was with him that night. Everything was perfect. I remembered being nervous I wanted to do it right, but it didn't matter cause we loved each other.
She gave me a sympathetic look. "Megs. I'm sorry." She said.
I had somehow begun to cry. I sighed and wiped away my tears. "Its not your fault, Lily. Ray is a good guy, and he loves you. And plus he's your best friend. What's bad about that?"
"Something could go wrong?"
"Like what Lily? Ray loves you and not just the kind of love guys have when they want to get laid."
She laughed. "Megan!"
"No Lil, seriously, ray cares about you, he has, and he always will. And even if 'something goes wrong' he's your friend before anything. You just have to remember that."
"Were you scared?"
I smiled, this time I could feel the tears coming. I nodded. "It works though, I promise."
"So. you spent time with Robbie today?" she asked, very quizzically. I knew she knew.
I opened my mouth. "You bitch!" I threw a pillow at her.
She laughed. "What'd he say?"
"That he liked me, and he has since he's gotten to know me."
"Yeah that's what he told us." She said. "What are you going to do about it?"
I paused. "I don't know."
"Don't let this Travis thing stop you."
I gave her a look.
"No, don't get me wrong. I loved Travis as much as the rest of us. But, you two broke up, and he's not here. Why not move on?"
He looked at me. He had great lips when he smiled.
I couldn't help but smile back.
"I have to." He said.
"No, you don't."
"I like you, so much. When you moved here you brought this amazing energy. And I think you made us all happier. I mean Lily now has that one girl friend that she can be with, and I think because of that she was a little less uptight about ray. Travis fell in love with you. And me? From the moment I met you, I've wanted to say this. Things should not be weird between us. If your still not over Travis, that's ok. But, I couldn't keep it in any longer." And he sighed.
I didn't know what to say. I half expected this from Robbie. From the time I got more attached into the group and felt welcome Robbie was the one who was always making sure I was ok. He was the one who I knew I could talk to. Yeah, sure I had Lily but wed been friends since we were two. Robbie was this new person who I felt I could completely open myself up to and he wouldn't try to fix it, he wouldn't try to understand. He just would, by listing.
Why was this happening?
"Robbie, I don't know what to say."
"Then don't say anything. Just promise this wont make things weird ok?"
I took a deep breath.
I looked at him and I could tell he was hurt. I couldn't stand it.
"I promise."
He smiled a nervous smile and let out a breath. I smiled back to return his feeling of nervousness.
**** Ray and Lily sat in Mickey's. Lily was drinking a hot chocolate while Ray was picking at a sandwich. She was talking about a new band she was really interested in and a new song she was thinking about writing. He was looking around Mickey's at the new stuff Mickey had put up, at the people, at a girl.
"Ray!" Lily said trying to get his attention.
"Huh?" he said looking at her.
"Your not listing."
"I'm sorry Lil, its. hey lets do something fun tonight."
"Like what?"
"I don't know, its summer, were going to be seniors in high school, lets do something. dramatic."
Lily smiled. "And what qualifies as dramatic."
He thought. "We could drive out to the coast?"
"Eh."
"Yeah, lets drive out to the coast, just you and me, some candles and. some food."
She raised an eyebrow. "Just you and me." She liked that.
****
"And what are you planning on doing with this boy at the beach?" I exclaimed after she had told me her plans.
She smiled at me. She collapsed onto her bed. "I want to Meg. I do really. But I'm scared."
I raised an eyebrow at her. I began to remember the night Travis and I had spent together. It was amazing. Time seemed to stand still when I was with him that night. Everything was perfect. I remembered being nervous I wanted to do it right, but it didn't matter cause we loved each other.
She gave me a sympathetic look. "Megs. I'm sorry." She said.
I had somehow begun to cry. I sighed and wiped away my tears. "Its not your fault, Lily. Ray is a good guy, and he loves you. And plus he's your best friend. What's bad about that?"
"Something could go wrong?"
"Like what Lily? Ray loves you and not just the kind of love guys have when they want to get laid."
She laughed. "Megan!"
"No Lil, seriously, ray cares about you, he has, and he always will. And even if 'something goes wrong' he's your friend before anything. You just have to remember that."
"Were you scared?"
I smiled, this time I could feel the tears coming. I nodded. "It works though, I promise."
"So. you spent time with Robbie today?" she asked, very quizzically. I knew she knew.
I opened my mouth. "You bitch!" I threw a pillow at her.
She laughed. "What'd he say?"
"That he liked me, and he has since he's gotten to know me."
"Yeah that's what he told us." She said. "What are you going to do about it?"
I paused. "I don't know."
"Don't let this Travis thing stop you."
I gave her a look.
"No, don't get me wrong. I loved Travis as much as the rest of us. But, you two broke up, and he's not here. Why not move on?"