"Oh Buffy, you're awake," he greeted.
"Yep."
"We've been working all morning on a game plan to deal with Slayers. We would have woken you, but we decided you probably needed your rest."
"Thanks, I did." She wondered briefly if they knew that she and Angel had stayed out all night and what they thought about her renewed relationship with Angel.
"Well now that you're up, you should join us." Buffy took her coffee and followed Giles upstairs to the room where Robin and Willow were waiting. They welcomed her warmly as she joined the redhead, sitting cross-legged on the floor. They spent most of the afternoon discussing their plans, drawing up a tentative curriculum of what they wanted to teach the Slayers and a plan for how to execute it all. It was approaching dinnertime when Buffy went down to the kitchen to get a drink and found Spike moping over a mug of blood.
"You know, brooding is really Angel's gig," she said, entering the kitchen and gaining the blond vampire's attention.
"Well he seems pretty happy these days, but I guess you would know all about that," he retorted bitterly. Buffy sighed and leaned against counter close to where Spike was sitting. She knew that he had been pretty much avoiding her since Angel returned home, and knew exactly why.
"I don't know what you expect from me, Spike," she said with exasperation. "I appreciate everything you done for me and I care for you, but you know that I don't love you like that and you know I love Angel."
"I don't expect anything from you, Slayer. I want something from you but I know I can't have it. That's why I'm leaving."
"Leaving? What do you mean?"
"I'm leaving L.A. There's nothing for me here. I think I have to go do my own thing for a while."
"So where are you going to go?"
"New York, maybe back to London. I don't know. I'll stay in touch if you need any help, but I just can't stick around here." Buffy felt so guilty. She had used him, played with his head, and otherwise treated him horribly for the past few years when all he done was love her. Granted, she never loved him back, but that gave her no excuse to be such a bitch and now it had gone so far that he felt the need to flee from her.
"I'm sorry, Spike. I'm really sorry that I ever hurt you. And you might not believe it but I will miss you." She leaned in and brushed a kiss against his cheek. A slight noise behind them drew both their attentions and Buffy was faced with the sight of Angel's back as he quickly retreated from the kitchen. She looked back at Spike, a panicky look flashing through her eyes. That one glance confirmed what he already knew, that she never loved him and never would.
"Go on, pet. Don't worry about me." She rushed after Angel, knowing she would find him in his bedroom. He told her to come in when she knocked and she entered to find him unbuttoning his dress shirt and pulling a tshirt over his head with his back to her. She stared at him, waiting for him to speak or at least turn to her but he did neither. Finally, she broke the silence.
"If you can't forgive my history with Spike, we're never going to work." He exhaled slowly before turning to face her.
"I forgive you. But that doesn't mean I can handle seeing you with him, kissing him." Anger crept into his voice. He had truly thought he could deal with the Spike thing. But seeing him so close to his Buffy brought out primitive urges that he thought would have disappeared with his vampirism. He wanted to rip his bleached blonde Childe's throat out and throw Buffy to ground and claim her.
"I wasn't kissing him. I was saying goodbye, okay?" she told him with her impatience hiding her hurt. After their long conversations last night, she thought they would be able to start fresh but apparently she had thought wrong. "He's leaving, so you won't have to deal with him anymore. And if you don't want to deal with me, I can leave too." She turn to the door, trying to blink back the tears in her eyes but suddenly found herself pinned to the wall with Angel's hands on her upper arms and his lips on hers. She kissed him back, pulling her arms out of his grasp only to wind them around his neck.
"You're mine now," he growled against her lips.
"Always."
"And you're not going anywhere."
"I don't want to," she moaned, kissing him again.
"Good." He scooped her up and carried her over to the bed. After the first time which had been all about desperation and suppressed need, he wanted their second time to be romantic, slow and tender, with candles, champagne and roses. But he couldn't let her go, couldn't take his lips off hers. He pushed her down into the pillows and his hands began to tear at her clothes.
Afterwards, when they both came down from the high, Buffy cuddled into his chest. "Are you happy now?"
"Very," he answered, smirking at her. She half-heartedly smacked his arm and he responded by pulling her in for a kiss. When he drew back, she looked into his eyes with all seriousness.
"Angel, I'm choosing you. The rest of it doesn't matter."
"I know, baby, but I can't help being jealous. All the time we missed with each other...Riley, Spike...I just don't want to lose you again."
"You won't," she promised softly. "It's you, Angel. It's always been you."