"Dammit."
Noooo... don't take that attitude! This is the chapter that debuts Inuyasha! Rin! Kagome! wait - I'm not happy about that last one!
"Hey!"
Eh. Anyway, witchyinuyashagurl1, you have a very good point.
"What was the point. Wait - don't tell me. I really don't want to know." Kouga said.
Don't worry Kouga kun! It wasn't about you this time. Kouga let out a sigh of relief. It was about Hiten. Besides... I think you've had your share of me picking on you...
"Thank you!"
...for now... Kouga twitched but shut up.
Hearing his name, the said thunder demon looked up while eating a donut.
"And wahff iff thaff?"
Well, I don't know why I didn't think of it before... you did eat Manten's heart didn't you?"WHAT?! THAT'S SO SICK!!! WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GET THAT FROM?!?!?!"
...er... i dunno... maybe episode what was it? 11 or something?
"WHAT?"
Yeah!"Oh! I remember watching that episode! I remember that snake lady, and she had the nicest b - "
"MIROKU!"
" - bones! I MEANT BONES!"
sure. And I like carp.
"...you do?" Hiten asked.
NO! Okay. This is really pointless, but still. Hiten, you ate Manten's heart. So that makes you a cannibal -
"WHAT?!"
- of sorts, and so you will be put in this containment chamber to keep all other characters safe. I'll be dead if Sin finds out I let you gnaw on Sesshoumaru's arm or something.... The authoress points to this little box of cement with a door with bars on it and a small side window, also with bars.
Overall, it pretty much just looked like a prison cell.
And that's because it is one. I stole that from the prop department from an old John Wayne movie.
Well...the budget! I'm only fifteen! Wait - I'm fourteen. Fourteen. I always forget how old I am... dammit.
"...that's just scary."
And so is Barney. Anyway, I can't possibly have all the money we need for a movie production... besides... I like to spend money... I blow it all... haha...
"Is this why we have such dingy dressing rooms? Because Margie will not be happy!" Naraku snipped indignantly.
You can have another potato.
"NO!"
Okay then... want some salt? Oh and who's Margie?
"My baboon pelt."
Sweet! My name is Marie!"...what?"
Marie. Y'anno? Oh nevermind! The authoress shook her head and motioned for every to sit. Inuyasha! Go change into your costume!!!
"Aww... do I HAVE to?"
Yeah. I'm pretty sure you have to.
"But no one else has to wear the real costumes of the character!!!" Inuyasha whined.
Okay. Fine. From now on, everyone will have to wear the same costumes their characters wear in the movie.
"Damn you Inuyasha." Sesshoumaru growled. He also flexed his right hand menacingly.
Hmm.. maybe I should make Sesshoumaru Aladdin... then I get to see him half naked! hehe... wahhh! Sin! Don't hit me! She's a bit annoyed because when we were watched the show, like that episode where Naraku and Sesshoumaru Join Forces and shiite... and he took off his shirt.. I froze it. When she complained... do you know what I said?
"I don't want to know. La la la.. I CAN'T HEAR YOU..."
Naraku. You spoil it. Anyway, I was all like 'BUT HE IS SO PREEEEEEEETTY!'"...I am?"
Yah. Me and Sin think that Naraku and Sushi are the hottest and the prettiest characters on the show. Of course she doesn't call Sesshoumaru Sushi... that's my fetish...
Naraku and Sesshoumaru both gasped. "Really?" Naraku breathed eagerly. Sesshoumaru started fanning himself with his hand.
yAH. Pretty Pretty. Oh so pretty. Now can we go on?
"I don't know... how do these look on me?"
Very nice. Inuyasha came into the room, having dressed rather quickly, in a purple vest with gold stitches, and white MC Hammer pants. Well... the bottom is pretty much your clothes... I just removed all the coloring...
"WHAT?!"
Yeah. Apparently you can do that. Don't worry. We'll paint it red later on...
And that hat of your is just OH SO ADORABLE!"Really? I think I look too Jewishy..."
I don't think Jewishy is a word...
"Yeah? Well carp ain't fish!"
::twitch:: carp. ::twitch::
"Can we just start shooting now?" Kagome cried in exasperation. "Do you have everything set up?"
Yep.
"The buildings..."
Yah.
"The guards..."
Uh-huh....
"The two kids..."
wha?
"The two kids! You know? The ones Inuyasha er - Aladdin is supposed to give the bread to!"
Ohhh... THOSE kids...
"So you have them?"
Don't worry. I'll get it done.
"I'm not sure I want to be in this scene anymore.." Sango said.
Yeah you do! Inuyasha gets to sing in this one!"Oh yeah. I have GOT to see this..." Kouga grinned.
Yeah... Kouga you really have no real reason to stay... I dunno if I feel like letting you perform yet... I'm kind of scared actually.
"What? Why?"
Well... err... do you have a nice butt?"WHAT?!?!"
Yeah. Okay. ANYWAY... Inuyasha -"Wait! What about my butt?"
... do you have your lines memorized?
"Hey! Don't ignore me bitch!"
"No. I can't. He took it." Inuyasha pointed a finger at someone the authoress didn't really want to look at the moment.
What did he do with it?
"He ate it."
Kouga blanched at this. "I DID NOT EAT YOUR SCRIPT! YOU FLUSHED IT DOWN THE TOILET!"
...is that why there was a flood?
"YEAH! STUPID MANGY MUTT DIDN'T LIKE THE PART WHERE HE HAS TO LISTEN TO NARAKU SO HE FLUSHED IT DOWN THE TOILET!"
OHHHH. Inuyasha. I'm not mad. Besides, here's a perk. You get to sit on top of Shippou and you are SUPPOSED to do that stuff.
"REALLY!?!?!"
...mmhmm... so do you want to read cue cards?
"Yeah!" Okay then. Places everyone!!!
Inuyasha is placed on top of a plaster building, made to be the exact replica of the Aladdin movie background. Yeah. I got lots of people to make this stuff... and some I stole from the Aladdin movie stage...
"That's not nice!"
Your ass isn't nice. Or is it...? The authoress mused and eyed Kouga. This made the wolf demon uncomfortabe, so he scooted in between Mr. Higurashi and Kagome.
AND ACTION!Inuyasha starts running across all the building, leaping over entire rooftops. Meanwhile, Sango, Kaede, Manten, and Ayame are staring as Yura continues to chase Inuyasha by herself. Even though Hiten was supposed to be in this scene, he's still in his little prison cell thing. hehe...
"Is he supposed to run that fast?" Sango called out.
Err - I don't think so.. Stop you guysYura began to run faster and Inuyasha glanced behind him and saw that Yura was gaining. He freaked out and leapt off one of the buildings and... NOT THROUGH THE WALL!!! THAT'LL COST A FORTUNE TO FIX!!!
But it was too late. Inuyasha was already gone.
Ack! ack! Kagome! Say sit! Say it now! NOW!!"Okay! Okay! OSUWARI!"
Not too far off there was a dull 'thud' sound. Everyone stood still for a few seconds, waiting to hear the cursing from Inuyasha. But there was none. Instead, there were these really weird crow calls... and suddenly...
"AH! GET THEM OFF! THEY'RE BITING MY EARS OFF!!!"
Oh... I guess those weren't crows... Naraku.. what are those birds that circle over almost dead people in the movies and are in the desert?
"...do you mean vultures?"
Yeah! Those! I guess there are some in California too...
"Duh you ijit! California is just a big desert!" Inuyasha roared as he ran into the stage room, looking very pissed off.
Oh... so that's why it never snows?"Yes Ms. Marie." Miroku chimed.
Ouo... you're just calling me that because you just want another part in the movie...
"Yeah... I'm not even a character.. why?"
The authoress shrugged. I dunno. I kinda just forgot about you.
"Are you serious?!" Sango exclaimed. "How can anyone forget about Miroku?!?!"
"Thank you Sango. I agree. She has a point. How can anyon forget about - "
" - A perverted, lecherous, groping mock of a monk!" Sango shouted.
Yeah. Sango.. you have a point. Miroku. I'll find somewhere to put you in.
...so how good are you with untangling strings?
"...what does that have to do with anything?"
I dunno. I just wanted to know. Anyway, Inuyasha up! UP! And as cameras were about to start going again...
"Hey! WAIT!" Hiten screeched. He was still inside his little prison cell thing.
Ow. Okay. We are waiting.
"I DIDN'T EAT MANTEN'S HEART!"
"YOU DIDN'T WHAT?!?!" Manten screeched too... like brothers... ::sigh::
"Look! He's right there! Healthy and ALIVE! How the hell could I have eaten his heart if he's here?!?!"
Oh. hm. that's a problem. Want me to kill him?"...what is WRONG with you?!"
I don't know. I've been to a bunch of rapists but nothing.
Yeah. The Rapists. None worked.
"...what the...?" Ignore it. It's the work of a fuzzy brownie... ::AHEM::
Okay. back to shooting. Inuyasha, don't run so friggin' fast. Yura, don't cut off his hair. Yura..?
Yura was found cornering Sesshoumaru in, well, a corner. She was purring something to him.
I don't want to know. Just step away from the Sushi and all will be right with the world.
"But I want his hair mou... it's so silky and nice..." Yura grumbled, but shuffled towards the set.
Alright. Now set and action! This time, Inuyasha ran like a 'retarded human' – his words... -- and the others were right on his tail.
...well... not LITERALLY... hey Inuyasha!
The said hanyou had been in the middle of a leap across two buildings, something the narrator had told him not to do... but he had looked up at the sound of his name and lost his concentration.
This means he fell kiddies...
As Inuyasha sat up wearily from a bundle of cloth, he said. "Wha?"
Do you have a tail? I know Sesshoumaru does, but do you? The question produced cries of outrage from both brothers.
"HALF-brothers! HALF-brothers!" Inuyasha chirped. Haha.. chirped. Like a birdie...
"Oh that reminds me of a time I owned two parakeets."
"You owned parakeets?!" Yura asked.
Naraku nodded. "I did indeed. They were two beautiful birds, and I loved to set their birdcage on the porch, right next to Margie."
Do go on Naraky kins...
Naraku twitched at his new nickname... the authoress seemed to like giving him a new one everytime she talked to him... "And one day I found that my two parakeets were missing, and Margie was being bad."
...and what happened?
Naraku shrugged and picked up an apple from the table and bit into it before answering. "I don't really remember. I saw red and the next thing I knew, Margie had run away and I had this lovely new outfit..."
Everyone blinked. Well, close to everyone... it seems that Kouga has learned how to fall asleep with his eyes open...
Oh and by the way Naraku... for the next few scenes that you have to be on a camel..."WHICH ONES?!" Naraku asked, taking out his copy of the script and flipping through it.
...err – all of them?
"...what about them? Please, don't sugarcoat it."
Err... umm... about that camel I was going to get... I couldn't get one. The AASPCA or something like that had a animal abuse threat thing posted against me and I'm not allowed to own any more camels.
"So what I am going to be using? Wait – no. No! NOOOO!! ANYTHING BUT THAT! NOT THE – "
Wait – wait... I wonder..."What? WHAT?"
...hmm... I wonder if that restraining order for animal abuse pertains to llamas...
"...no."
Really? Yay! Okay..."No... I mean, I'm not getting on a friggin' llama. You can't get a friggin' llama. I'll sue you if you even smell a friggin' llama. GOT THAT?!?!"
...err – smell? Why would I smell a llama?
"JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION!"
You can sue me. But you won't be able to do anything with the money if you're dead! HAHAHAHAHA...
"Oh. My. God." Naraku sighed and held his forehead.
Stop being such a drama queen... and besides, we still have the rocking horse!::creak::
::creak::
"No."
But... but...the narrator gave pouty lips. I even personalized it! And so she had... because on the right side of the rocking horse, there was a name done in beautiful calligraphy, inked on with detail... and it was Naraku...
Okay... so not much of the movie was done... but now, I'm back! You have to give Sin some credit for this, because the story about the parakeets was inspired by her...
"What do you mean, inspired by her! I did have parakeets! Von Leroy Lynn Levoy and dear old Vladdamire!"
okay. Sure. We'll say that.
"Does this mean shooting is over?" Inuyasha asked.
Err – I think so. I don't feel like shooting anymore. Well, there are like four bullets left in this gun... and the director patted a pistol on her waist. Oh! Oh! Let's play, DO YOU FEEL LUCKY?
Haha... anyone? Wait – hello... hello...hello...hello?
Damn that echo. As the narrator looked around, she saw that the whole stage room was empty.
Haha... I get to throw a party!!! Yay! Lesse... where's that number for Lenny's Magic Hat? Oh! And have to have midget strippers!! Oh and – AWK!
And suddenly a tug on the bottom of her shirt caused to authoress to squawk.
[[yeah. I do that in real life too.]]
AWK! WHAT THE FUCK!! FUNCKY!!! "Err – Ms. Marie-sama? Can I go on now?"
As the narrator looked down, she grinned.
ouo! YOU SOO CUUUUTE!! CUUUUUUUUUUUTIIIIIIIIIEEE!
Well... since no one's around, and we really didn't get much done... Rin, you want to make a home movie?
"Yay! Can we have flowers and daffodils and daises?"
err - why not? I was thinking more along the lines of... rabid monkey kills three. Tune in at seven for the full story ... wait. no. That's the news...