Who: (Reclining in a chair) C'est la vie, this is the life.
Hiei: (fanning Who with palm leaf)
Koenma: (rubbing Who's feet)
Who: This just can't any better. (Sit up straight moves foot out if Koenma's hands) Which means it can only get worse. (Looks at Hiei and Koenma) Oh well (reclines again) I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho.
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Yusuke and the other were walking down a rather misty and mysterious path, following explicit directions Koenma had given to them.
"I wish I had noticed this while Kallana was still pretending to be Delilah. Had I known." stated Kurama with his regretful musings.
"No one's blaming you for this Kurama." Said Yusuke in a comforting tone, which Kurama often forget the boy was capable of doing. "We'd probably still end up getting screwed over." Then stated the boy his voice dropping into a raspy grumble. "I mean she can make us fall in love with her at will, how are supposed to fight against that!?! Raincoats." Then grumbled Yusuke angrily remembering the advice Koenma had offered.
"It's not fair. Oh this is awful." Whined an anguished Kuwabara. "I love Yukina, Yukina. Our love should be able to concur this. My heart belongs to Yukina, I only want to love her. Oh Yukina my love forgive me" Continued Kuwabara in quite an overly dramatic display. As he went into fits, while still professing his love for the ice maiden.
It seemed that for a moment the boy would crumble to his knees.
Hiei rolled his eyes, and grumbled, "Baka." It was not only embarrassing to hear Kuwabara talking about his sister as he was; it was also annoying. Perhaps he would put the boy out of his misery.
"Kurama," Stated Yusuke sounding genuinely concerned at the moment. Things always seemed most unsettling when Yusuke started acting serious, and seeing the concern in Yusuke's eyes he wished that the boy would crack a joke or impart some of his trademark smart ass wit. "How is it you didn't get messed up by Kallana's spell?"
The red head, could only sadly shake his head. "As I've stated before Yusuke. I do not know. It must have been something I'd done before the rain"
"Or you're secretly a girl." Quipped Yusuke, with a smile. Somehow that comment brought the tension of the moment down.
"You couldn't be more wrong." Said Kurama, lightheartedly, as he slightly shook his head. There was not the slightest hint of annoyance in his voice. Really, the boy was just relived that Yusuke was not looking too seriously at the situation. And being himself.
"Can you think of anything that you, Kuwabara, and Hiei may have done, or not done. That I would've."
"What? You mean besides not going to school the day before." Stated Yusuke in a dry manner. Kurama opened his mouth to try and get some more useful information from the spirit detective, only to find his words got caught in his throat.
The mists had suddenly cleared and the four spirit detectives found themselves standing in front of a large palace. Which had just appeared in front of the boys. For a moment the boys just stared up speechless, and utterly flabbergasted. The building rivaled if not surpassed the magnificence that any of the detectives had seen.
"Was that here a minuet ago?" Inquired Kuwabara looking upward, his eyes looking toward the roof of the building.
"The toddler sure can pick em." Said Yusuke. The others nodded in agreement, as they stood in front of a gigantic pair of red double doors. As the four spirit detectives neared the door, they swung open, as if expecting the four of them. A voice echoed invitations to the boys as the doors creaked open. Kurama and Hiei were the first to enter followed by Yusuke, and then Kuwabara who looked about nervously as he stepped through the thresholds.
The interior of the fortified building was even more illustrious, than it's exterior. From what the boys could tell they stood in a large greeting hall. Astonished eyes drifted around the room from the red and gold floor to the crystal chandeliers hanging from the rather low ceiling.
After the boys spent time just standing in awe, they noticed figure coming toward them from a dark hallway. A green, ogre with curly brown hair and a leopard skin loincloth stepped out the greet the four boys. The ogre smiled, and without a word gestured for the boys to follow him.
The detectives looked at one another a little unsure, but followed anyway. The foursome followed the ogre down the corridor as candles suddenly flickered to life in front of them. Strange painting, with moving eyes, and anonymous gazes lined the walls. Yusuke noticed a practically strange picture, of what appeared to be Koenma in a diaper. The boy restrained a chuckle and pointed it out to Kuwabara.
The tall carrot top looked at the picture of Koenma exclusively, in a diaper and let out a very loud guffaw. The ogre, Kurama, and Hiei turned toward Kuwabara and Yusuke. Both of the boys quieted down out of embarrassment, and began to follow the others silently. Of course that was after Yusuke surreptitiously pinched Kuwabara for being so loud.
Finally after what seemed like years of walking in silence. The ogre opened a door and gestured for the boys to go in. The room must have been an office, for it had a large desk in it, a bookcase on the far wall, a fire place and four large plush chairs. Once the boys were inside the ogre left never speaking a word. Leaving the four spirit detectives to their own devices.
Yusuke looked at the picture of a gorgeous woman with long dark brown hair and a skin tight red gown that hung over the fireplace for a moment, then turned back to the others. "Is it me, or does this place seem a little overdone?" He went over to one of the chairs but opted not to sit down.
"You'd need a tour guide just to get to the bathroom." Said Kuwabara he looked around the room a moment. Up, down left, right, after glancing about a bit the boy flounced into one of the chairs. No sooner had the boy's posterior hit the chair than he found himself being absorbed by the cushion of the chair.
"Help!" Cried the panicked boy. "The chair's eating me." Stated Kuwabara so deep in the chair that only his extremities, stuck out. Kurama and Yusuke with to Kuwabara's aid. Hiei, on the other hand, stood with arms folded over his chest watching the others with slight amusement.
"So." Said Yusuke, slightly turning to Kurama, as the two of them held Kuwabara arms, trying to pull him from the confines of the cushion. "You got any idea where Koenma's sent us now?"
"This." Siad Kurama pausing as he tired to give a heavy heave, so as to liberate Kuwabara. "As far as I can tell. Is the palace of Adders." Yusuke gave the red head a look that begged for a bit of elaboration. "This is the place filled with treasure with power beyond even those held in the vaults of spirit world." Kurama continued tugging with Yusuke, and the two boys had almost freed the trapped Kuwabara from his snare.
"I'm surprised, this place is so conspicuous. It's a wonder…" Kurama strained as he tugged at Kuwabara. "that the palace isn't under consent siege. But, my guess is it only lets you find it if you're invited. Otherwise, it's a hopeless search. Not even Youko could find the whereabouts of this place." (A/N. Would he refer to him like that? Screw it, now he does.)
Kurama lost himself in thought for a moment, and his grip on Kuwabara waned. Feeling himself being drawn forward, Kurama quickly regained his grip, and his footing.
Just as Kuwabara was able to slide free from the chair, the sound, of what could only be described as a isolated explosion drew the attentions of Kurama, Yusuke, and Hiei. Kurama and Yusuke in their haste to investigate dropped Kuwabara, who was promptly engulfed by the cushion once again.
A column of red smoke was settling just in front of the fire place. When the smoke dissipated, the boys eyes widened. In front of them stood a woman: in a red dress, she was holding a cigarette. The woman looked very old, pale skin gangly, looking. She wore a dress that she didn't seem to have any earthly business wearing. Mainly because of the fact that on a healthier and younger woman it might have been tight, but it hang loosely from her bony form. The woman wore a turban-like hat that had a ruby in the center or it, and a feather that drooped down in a sickly manner. She looked as if she'd come straight from the twenties, the long way.
The three boys that could see the woman, were quickly taken aback. The woman didn't seemed very pleased with the boys' presences either. She looked at them incredulously for a moment than took a long drag from his cigarette. After releasing a large cloud of smoke the woman addressed the boys with a deep raspy voice.
"Hello boys," stated the woman despondently "I'm Pursula , guardian of Adders." Pursula spoke with her nose in the air never offering the boys eye contact. "I've been expecting you. Junior told me of your problem. I told the little munchkin to recruit more female operatives. But does he ever listen to me? No. That's why he's in this mess again. And I can't even trust the three of you." The woman walked up to the boys getting uncomfortably close to them.
Kurama gave a small cough as Pursula waved her cigarette in the boy's face. "I know beggars can't be choosers, but I'm far from desperate, if you're the best junior can offer well…"
"Excuse me." Said Kurama waving away some smoke, from his face. "We were told you could help us."
"Oh I could. But that doesn't mean I'm going to." Said Pursula tartly letting some ash from her cigarette fall to the floor.
"What? How can you not help us?" Stated an enraged Yusuke.
"I don't have to." Stated Pursula in a point blank manner.
"You crazy old sack of bones."
"No manners whatsoever. Junior is slipping." Said Pursula."
"Why will you not help us?" Inquired Kurama.
"It should be obvious enough. I'm an old woman I haven't the breath to explain just tell Junior I declined. I'm obligated to protect that relic. Now if you don't mind I'd like you three gone."
There was a soft cry on from the chair. "Guys where as you, I suffocating!" Called Kuwabara his voice muffled. Kurama and Yusuke had just realized that they had left Kuwabara trapped in the chair. The two boys hastily pulled Kuwabara out of the chair.
Kuwabara sucked in a deep breath "Geez guys what took ya so long?" Inquired Kuwabara fixing himself up best he could. Pursula's eyes flickered over Kuwabara, and her thin lips curled into a smile
"Come on Kuwabara," Said Kurama. "We'll find no help here." Stated the boy.
"Buh?"
"The walking skeleton doesn't want to help us." Said Yusuke tartly, motioning to Pursula.
"I said nothing of the sort. In fact I think it's awful the thought of anyone having to be forced to love someone. I think maybe. I can be persuaded to aid in your cause. But it is late rest the night here."
Yusuke shared a shocked look with Hiei, and Kurama, wondering about the woman, if you could call her that, and her sudden change of heart.
"I'll show you to your rooms." Pursula motion to the door, latching onto Kuwabara's arm as he left out the door. Yusuke and Kurama looked at the strange woman's actions already figuring out a way to make sure they'd get the chalice they sought.
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Hiei: (Pealing grape)
Who: Will wonders ever cease? (looks at Koenma washing her dishes) This is great
Koenma: Is there anything else you'd like me to do?
Who: Hm (thinks) You could. (Looks at Koenma)
Koenma: (Statue-like)
Who: (looks at watch) Over already dang. I was enjoying the service. Oh well. Time to disappear (Takes off)