Sweet Misery
+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
The prank went smoothly after all the planning Remus, James, Sirius, and Lauren had put into it. Not one person suspected them of anything, well except Dumbledore who always seemed to know everything that happens at Hogwarts. The four of them got detentions and served them out (some were better than others were).
+*+*+*+*+
A few months had passed, and the Christmas Holidays were coming quickly. Lily, Lauren, and Remus were all staying for Christmas. Gwynn and Sirius had to return home because they had some relatives coming in from Poland and Romania. James, on the other hand, had an eye appointment set up by his parents for after Christmas. He wasn't happy about that at all and tried to get out of going by making his good-byes at school last long so he would miss the carriages, but Gwynn and Sirius dragged him, kicking and yelling, to a carriage.
"Poor James," said Lauren watching Gwynn trying to pull James by the arm into the carriage.
"Yeah, but he kinda is forcing this upon himself," stated Remus.
Lily sighed, "Why must he fight the inevitable?"
The three of them watched as Sirius grabbed James' feet and Gwynn hooked her arms under his and the two of them lifted the struggling James into the carriage. The three waved good-bye as the carriage set off with Gwynn and Sirius pinning James down in a seat.
"At least they got him in," Lauren said turning to head back inside.
"I wonder what type of glasses he'll get," pondered Lily.
"You assume he's going to get glasses," said Remus.
"Well, yeah!" Lily agreed. "Look at the way he reads. He has whatever he's reading like two inches away from his face."
"You've seen him read?" Lauren asked in mock astonishment. "Why didn't you alert the press?!"
"It was just a note," replied Lily.
"Well, that's nothing good at all, now is it?" Remus said. "If he was reading 'Hogwarts, A History', I'd pay you both five galleons."
Lily and Lauren looked at each other than at Remus.
"Can we have that in writing?" Lauren asked.
"Sure, but it only counts if he reads it on his own free will," answered Remus.
"That makes the whole thing pointless," Lily said.
"But there's still a chance!" Lauren pointed out.
When the three of them got to the common room, Lily grabbed a piece of parchment and a quill, quickly scribbled something on it, and handed it to Remus.
"I, Remus," he read, "owe Lily and Lauren five galleons each if James reads 'Hogwarts, A History' out of his own free will, not being forced by Lily or Lauren, or any other person." He took the quill from Lily and signed at the bottom.
Lauren snatched the parchment away from him and said, "I'm going to put this somewhere safe," before she ran up to her dorm.
Remus shook his head, "You two are never going to get those galleons."
"Assumptions are not good things," Lily said.
"Ah, but this isn't an assumption, it's a fact."
"How so?"
"James would never read 'Hogwarts, A History'. He hates reading anything that's remotely related to history."
"He can change you know."
"Yes, but I highly doubt it."
+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
The winter holidays came and went, the day finally came when the students had to return to their classes.
"So, Jamie, where are the glasses?" Gwynn asked when they arrived in Potions.
"I apparently don't need them," replied James. "My eyes are perfectly fine."
"If your eyes are fine then how come you have your astronomy and charms books when we don't need them today?" Sirius asked, who had been going through James's bag for a quill.
"James, just put them on," said Remus.
"They can't be that bad!" Lauren said.
"But I look stupid in them!" James complained.
"James, come on!" Lily said.
"No way," replied James.
"Everyone take your seats," Professor Turco said, entering the room just as the bell rang signaling the start of class.
The small group of Gryffindors took their seats around the room. Professor Turco burst into an explanation of the bazor and it's importance to potions. She wrote notes for the students to copy. As she was writing, Lauren tossed a note to James.
+*+*+*+*+
(A/n: Lauren's writing is in italics, James's is in bold, and Gwynn's in bold/italics.)
James, just put on your glasses, you'll have a much easier time in class.
I don't need them!
You are such a stubborn pansy.
I'm not a pansy!
Would you prefer a fairy?
No!
Twit?
Enough with the names. I'm not going to put on my glasses and that's final!
Oh it's not final!
What are you going to do about it, Fonseca?
I'll tell you what I'll do, Potter. I'll learn a spell to lock those glasses on your face forever and you won't be able to take them off.
I'd like to see you try.
I wonder if Liam knows...
Like Liam would tell you! He's head boy!
From what Gwynn told me, he was quite the prankster. In fact, he currently holds the detention record! So nya nya!
+*+*+*+*+
Gwynn looked back at Lauren and James. She caught Lauren's eye and mouthed, "Let me see." Lauren tossed the note to Gwynn after making sure the professor wasn't looking.
+*+*+*+*+
Lauren's right you know.
Why are you ganging up on me?!
Think of it as slight payback for Mr. O's.
Ooooo! What happened?
It's a long story, don't bother.
Why? So you can concentrate on class?
Take notes like a good little boy?
If he could read the notes.
I can read the board perfectly fine!
Tell me, where does a bazor come from?
... The stretch of a gral.
Wasn't listening either! It's a GOAT not a GRAL.
What is a gral anyway?
I don't know.
You came up with it, you should know.
Hey, I misread the board!
Do grals have stretches?
Only the British ones.
What?
What about French grals?
They have compressions.
Are you some sort of gral expert?
Yes, I got my major in gral knowledge at the Gral University in Gralton, New Graland.
That explains everything.
What else can you major in at GU?
Gral anatomy, gral theory, gral economics, gral construction, and gral arithmetic.
Gral arithmetic?
Yes, gral arithmetic.
You know, one gral + two grals = 32 grals.
No more grals please!
+*+*+*+*+
"Mr. Potter, hand me that note," Professor Turco said suddenly.
James looked up and saw Professor Turco standing right in front of him holding out her hand. He handed her the note and she read over it quickly.
"Grals, Mr. Potter?" Professor Turco asked with a look that seemed to be questioning his intelligence. "You, Miss Black, and Miss Fonseca shall see me after class." Professor Turco walked back up to the front of the classroom and set the note on her desk.
At the end of class, Gwynn, Lauren, and James walked up to Professor Turco's desk and waited for the rest of the class to file out.
"I will not tolerate note writing in my class," she said glaring at them over the rim of her glasses. "I expect you all to write me a four foot essay on why one should care more about a bazor than a gral. Have it done by next class."
The three of them nodded their heads and started to walk out when Professor Turco added, "Ten points will be taken away from Gryffindor." They left muttering about how much they hated her. Lily, Sirius, and Remus were all waiting outside for them.
"So?" Lily asked.
"We have to write a four foot essay on why one should care more about a bazor than a gral," replied Gwynn.
"And we also lost ten points," added James.
"What is a gral?" Sirius inquired.
"Jamie made it up," replied Gwynn.
"Did not," snapped James.
"Where's a bazor found?" Lauren asked. "You said, 'the stretch of a gral'."
"Grals have stretches?" Remus said.
"Only the British ones," Gwynn, Lauren, and James said at once.
"This is getting too silly," said Lily shaking her head and starting off towards Charms.
In Charms, the group of six took their seats in the back of the class. Sirius grabbed James's bag when he wasn't paying attention and began digging through it. During the middle of class when Professor Flitwick was showing them how to perform a charm, Sirius shouted, "Ah HA!" holding up a small black case in the air. The whole class turned and looked at him.
"It's ok," said Sirius, "go back to your lessons!" The professor gave him a quick glare before returning to teaching. James noticed what Sirius was holding in his hands and snatched at it. Sirius tossed it over James's head to Lily who caught it. Lily was about to open it when James grabbed at the case but lost his balance on his chair and fell to the ground taking Lily with him. The two created so much noise, the class looked back at them once again.
"What is going on over there?" Professor Flitwick asked angrily.
"A dance party, sir," Sirius said with a straight face.
"I beg your pardon?"
"A. Dance. Party. Sir." Lauren repeated slowly.
"Yeah, you see, we were having a great time, and James and Lily decide to start dancing on their chairs," Sirius explained.
"Shut up, Sirius!" Lily snapped.
"Oh, that hurt," said Sirius holding a hand over his heart.
"Detention, the four of you," Professor Flitwick said.
The rest of the lesson went smoothly. James, though, had forgotten that Lily still had his case.
+*+*+*+*+
After class, Lily walked behind James and opened the case. She pulled out a pair of glasses. Gwynn also saw this. Lily nodded to Gwynn and Gwynn whispered something to Lauren. The guys were oblivious to what the girls were up to. Gwynn silently counted down. Three... Two... One! Lauren and Gwynn grabbed James's arms and held him as still as possible while Lily stuck the glasses on him. When Gwynn and Lauren let go, James quickly pulled the glasses off.
"No, keep them on!" Gwynn whined.
"Yea, they weren't bad at all!" Lauren said.
"They look good on you!" Lily agreed.
"Really?" James asked, just as he was about to put them away.
"Yes!" the girls chorused.
"Take it from us, James," said Lauren. "We know what looks good."
James put his glasses back on.
"You know, I might just want to go out with you," Gwynn said.
"You look very sophisticated," said Lily.
Remus and Sirius rolled their eyes as the girls continued to praise James. Lauren happened to see them.
"You're just jealous that dear little Jamsie is getting more attention than you two," she said, placing her hands on James's shoulders.
"No, it's just the cheesy comments," explained Sirius.
"James, you look so sophisticated!" Remus said in a high voice.
"Oh, James you look so cute!" Sirius said mimicking Remus's tone.
"James let me go you with you!" Sirius and Remus chorused.
"You guys better get used to those comments," said James, straightening his glasses. "You'll be hearing them a lot more often!" The girls took this chance to annoy Remus and Sirius more.
"James, let me walk with you to class!" Lauren shouted, clinging to James's left arm.
"Oh James you're so cute!" Lily squealed grabbing his other arm.
"Go out with me James!" Gwynn pleaded throwing her arms around his neck.
"Cut that out," Sirius said.
"It's sickening," added Remus.
Lily, Lauren, and Gwynn all giggled insanely as James put his arms around them and they walked off down the corridor, receiving odd looks from the other students.
+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
A/n: Yay! Another chapter done! Moving on.
+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+