A/N: I'm not ducking any tomatoes or any other veggie you guys want to throw at me for this truly disgusting delay between chapters. I have a fabulous excuse! So, if you're interested, read it below. Meanwhile enjoy the next chapter!
CHAPTER NINE: (Wax on, Wax off):
"So...." Kyan said curiously as they settled into the SUV and began to drive. "What'd you guys buy?"
Inuyasha stared at him. "I don't know."
"What do you mean, you don't know? You just bought the stuff!"
Inuyasha raised one eyebrow. "Just because I bought it doesn't mean I remember it. It was stuff." Inuyasha shrugged carelessly. "A lot of stuff. Shirts, pants, hats, coats, shoes. Y'know, stuff."
Kyan shook his head. "He buys a small department store and can't recall one single item. Good lord, straight men just don't use their brains," he mumbled.
"Feh," Inuyasha snorted. "We use our brains for other things. Like Ramen."
"Oh, for Ramen. How foolish of me not to have realized that Ramen is what brains are for," Kyan said sarcastically.
"It's okay. No one expected you to know it," Inuyasha said comfortingly, never realizing the sarcasm behind Kyan's words.
Its like he has a shield that protects him from all normalcies, Kyan thought in despair. You can't insult the guy because he doesn't realize when he's getting dissed!
"Where are we going?" Inuyasha asked, not bothering to ask about Kyans suffering groan.
"Oh no. That's a surprise," Kyan answered, visions leaping around his head of a certain hanyou in a certain chair.
"Tell me! Tell me! Tell me!!!" Inuyasha whined. His eyes lit up as an idea popped into his head. "It's the supermarket! We're going to the supermarket!!"
Kyan rolled to a stop. Turning, he gave Inuyasha a confused look. "I'm sorry, what?"
"You guys say that a lot," Inuyasha commented, eagerly looking around for the food store.
"Well, if you made sense, we wouldn't say it. And what the hell do you mean 'supermarket'? You think the big surprise is a supermarket?" Kyan asked in disbelieve.
"I love supermarkets! Chow!" Inuyasha said in excitement. "Ramen places!"
Kyan stared at the passenger seat for a moment. Resolutely facing forward, he began to drive again silently. After a moment or two had passed, Kyan said in a strangled voice, "Chow? Ramen places?? You're crazy!!"
"No, I'm hungry," Inuyasha corrected.
Kyan shot him a look. "Whatever. We'll eat if you cooperate."
"Co, cooperate?" Inuyasha shook his head. What the hell does that mean?
"Meaning if you do everything I tell you, we'll go get....chow," Kyan replied with a grimace.
"But I want chow now!" Inuyasha sulked. He folded his arms together and slouched down into his seat, pouting.
"Oh for gods sake! Chow is for later! We have an appointment," Kyan replied testily.
"But we are getting chow later?"
"Yes," Kyan sighed. "We are getting chow later."
"Chow!" Inuyasha said and he clapped his hands. I haven't eaten since breakfast! I'm starving!
The SUV stopped and Inuyasha stepped out cheerfully onto the sidewalk.
The store they faced looked innocent enough. Kyan pulled open the doors and ushered Inuyasha inside. The always suspicious hanyou sniffed. There was an odd smell about the place but, on the whole, it wasn't a dangerous looking store. Or it wouldn't have been if you discounted the freak behind the desk.
Inuyasha stared openly, wondering what demon had possessed her body and forced her put those pins in her face. The woman had short, choppy, electric orange hair with a brightly made up face. What stood out was the amount of facial piercings the woman had. Her lip, chin, eyebrows, nose and ears were all pierced multiple times. There was even a chain linking one of her many earrings to the nose ring in her right nostril. Upon seeing Inuyasha staring, the orange haired pain addict stuck out her tongue revealing a small ball of metal imbedded in that muscle.
Inuyasha jumped. What the hell??
Kyan, not fazed at all by the teenager, strode up to the desk and began to ask about Inuyasha's appointment. "So, is Sazu Masato here?"
"Yep. He's just finishing up another customer and then he'll be right with you. You can sit down over there in the lounge," the girl answered. Kyan nodded his thanks and walked in, Inuyasha on his heels. Inuyasha glanced back at the possessed girl at the desk and yelped when he saw her wriggling her fingers at him. He scurried to hide near Kyan.
Kyan looked backward, saw the flirting punk and the panicking Inuyasha, and burst out laughing.
"It's not funny," snarled Inuyasha as he pushed past Kyan to the relative safety of the waiting room. "Where are we anyways?"
"We are in one of the coolest hair salons in the Tokyo area, Hair Snob! They give the most awesome haircuts here! You'll love it!"
Inuyasha blinked and stopped in the middle of the waiting area. "You know, it's the weirdest thing. I could have just sworn you said 'haircut'. Isn't that bizarre?" Inuyasha laughed nervously.
"I did say haircut," Kyan replied, a little perplexed by Inuyasha's rather extreme reaction.
"Hair....cut?" Inuyasha asked, beginning to get nervous.
"Haircut!" Kyan replied happily. "We are going to fix you up!"
"I, I, I, I...." stammered Inuyasha.
"Calm down. It's not like a bris milah or anything." Kyan said jokingly.
"A what?"
"Jewish thing. You know, eighth day, they cut off the foreskin from the boy's penis..." Kyan said with a smile. For emphasis, he held up a nearby pair of scissors and clacked them together in Inuyasha's direction.
Inuyasha's face lost all its color and felt all his muscles lose their strength at once. Cut...off.....my...?
"OH MY GOD!!!!!" Inuyasha screamed and leapt straight for the ceiling. No one, and he meant no one, was getting anywhere near his manhood with those weird cutting things.
"Oh, come on down! It's just a little snip! It'll just hurt for a second! Then you'll pass out!" Kyan joked.
Inuyasha's eyes widened and he firmly wrapped his arms and legs around the light fixture he was hanging from. "How about not?!?" the terrified hanyou screamed down, an edge of hysteria in his voice.
Kyan sighed. "Oh, my god. Did you take me seriously? Why would you do that?" the hairstylist chuckled.
"Oh, gee, Kyan, I don't know," Inuyasha said sarcastically. "Maybe because you were making those noises and pointing scissors at my crotch!!"
"No. Inuyasha, it was a joke!" Kyan explained.
"That some sick sense of humor you have there, hair man!" Inuyasha snarled from one of the light fixtures.
"I know! I'm sorry! Come down!" Kyan said, hopping from foot to foot anxiously.
"What, so you can trap me and then castrate me? HA! How stupid do you think I am?!?!" Inuysha screamed frantically.
"Right now? Very," Kyan answered with raised eyebrows.
Inuyasha waved a fist at Kyan, almost leaning too far out. Catching himself at the last moment before falling, Inuyasha shouted down, "I ain't coming down and you can't make me!!"
Kyan pinched the bridge between his nose and took ten deep calming breaths. Plastering on a fake smile, Kyan turned to the fascinated punk girl behind the desk. "Excuse me, would you mind getting me a ladder....Hiromi?" he said, reading her name tag.
"Anyone who tries to take me down is going down, understand?" Inuyasha threatened. "You ain't cutting anything off me!"
"It. Was. A. Joke. Y'know? As in ha ha?" Kyan said to the ceiling, getting a headache from all the yelling.
"You see anyone laughing?" Inuyasha said vehemently.
Hiromi rolled her eyes. "Puh-lease stop being so over dramatic," she drawled, putting all her teenage experience of sarcasm to work.
"Wha..?" Inuyasha asked. How the hell did she come into this conversation?
"I mean, all this is place is going to do is Cut. Your. Hair," the girl emphasized.
"Yeah but not the hair on my head!!"
The girl blinked at him before scrunching her nose in disgust. "Ew. That's all I'm saying about that comment. Ew ew ew ew ew."
"Get over it, it was just a joke," Inuyasha taunted.
"It wasn't funny," the girl replied, taunting in the same high pitch nasal voice. "But you're right. It was a joke. Just like Kyan's was. What, can't you take an innocent jab?" She flashed him a look of utter disdain
"Yeah, when its amusing!" Inuyasha snapped.
"Get over yourself. People have different opinions on what's funny. Evidently, Kyan has a good sense of humor and you....you don't," the girl finished.
"I do so!" Inuyasha protested.
"Whatever. Get down. It's not like you're going for a wax-"
"NO!" shouted Kyan, clamping the girl's mouth shut with his hand. "No no, no, no, no!!!!" He panted for breath and said more quietly, "If he's freaked out by a haircut, how do you think he'll react to a waxing?"
"Oh."
"Yeah. Let's just get his hair cut and then we'll deal with the forest above his eyes," Kyan said in a conspirators whisper.
"All right," Hiromi said. Looking up at Inuyasha, she yelled, "Get down and you can take someone hostage-"
"What!?!" Kyan gasped. "Oh, no. No. No. No- you don't know him." Kyan said a little frantic. "We are not, and I repeat not, letting him have hostages. That will not help this situation. Trust me," he said earnestly. Kyan shuddered when he imagined what Inuyasha would do with a captive.
"I'll be the hostage," Hiromi shrugged. Looking up at the dangling hanyou, she gave him a flirtatious smile. "Hey, if I'm bad, will you spank me?"
Inuyasha's ears flew back in shock and he tightened his hold on the chandelier. "No way I'm coming down now. Never ever," he mumbled.
Kyan shot Hiromi an annoyed look. "Thank you very much, little Miss Horny. Now look at what you did!" He glanced at the quivering half demon and turned back to Hiromi. Waving his hands in the air, Kyan asked, "Could you not tell he has personal space issues?"
"I do not have issues! I just don't want my, my thingi attacked!" Inuyasha clarified at the top of his lungs.
"No ones attacking your thingi!" Kyan reassured him desperately.
"Is it worth attacking?" Hiromi asked 'innocently'.
"You," Kyan said, shaking his finger in her face, "are not helping." He thought for a moment and then added, "but yeah, it totally is."
"How big?"
"Well, from what I've seen-"
"Hello?!?! I can hear you!" shouted a horrified Inuyasha.
Kyan smiled, "Unless you get down here right now, I'm going to tell this sweet young woman all about you and your-"
Inuyasha broke and dropped down to the ground. "Happy?" he snapped. "Are you satisfied??"
Kyan sighed. "How about this? If it'll make you feel better, you can take out Tessuiga. If you feel the hair stylist touch anything more then your hair or your skull, you can slice and dice the guy until your savage little heart is satisfied. K?"
Grudgingly, Inuyasha nodded. "Where do we go now?"
"I'll take you," Hiromi offered. "Masato-sama's area is back here"
As Hiromi led, Kyan explained to Inuyasha exactly to who they were going to.
"Masato-sama? What's with the sama?" Inuyasha asked curiously.
"Sazu-sama is one of Tokyo's foremost hair experts-"
"A 'hair expert'?" Inuyasha asked.
"Yeah," Kyan replied.
"There are people who are experts in hair?" Inuyasha asked again, slightly amused.
Kyan glared. "Do you have a problem with that?"
Inuyasha held up his hands as in surrender and shrugged his shoulders. "No no no. It's just that you guys know the weirdest people," the hanyou mumbled. "Thom and Carson knows these weird stores, Jai knows, well, everyone who's not normal and Ted cooks. I mean, your weird friends even beat out those freaks who Kagome calls friends."
Kyan shot the hanyou a look. "What you call weird most people would just call diverse."
"Big difference," Inuyasha sniffed.
"Anyways, Sazu-sama is known for his cutting edge style, his fearless approach to both men and women's hair. He's a legend in his own time. And he's hot," Kyan added in an excited whisper.
Inuyasha stared at him. "Oh, now I can die happy. My hair expert is good looking," he drawled slowly. "Hurray."
"Spoilsport," Kyan mumbled.
"Here we go," Hiromi announced, standing next to a chair. "Masato-sama will be with you in a moment."
"Thanks," Kyan smiled as Hiromi left the room. Turning to Inuyasha, Kyan looked at his charge and said, very seriously, "Look at what I'm standing next to."
"It's a chair..." Inuyasha said slowly.
"Exactly. Get everything out of your system now. Sit in it. Make sure that there is nothing that'll spark your curiosity while Masato has his scissors with him. Doing something to damage his chair will ruin his concentration and artists do not do well with interruption of their muse," Kyan said with intensity.
Inuyasha snorted. "That has got to be the stupidest thing I have ever heard," Inuyasha said. "Muse, an artist, his concentration- all craziness. All artists are crazy. The last artist I met tried to kill me," the hanyou added.
"Oh, that's a shock," Kyan said deadpan.
"Shut up," Inuyasha growled.
"Hello? You must be Kyan and Inuyasha." A brown eyed friendly looking man smiled at his customers.
He looks...normal, Inuyasha noted in surprise. With a small goatee decorated his lower face and funky glasses were perched on his nose, Masato Suza had avoided going overboard with his style. An all around sensible looking man, dressed casually and simply, Suza was obviously at ease with himself and his chosen profession.
"My name is Suza Masato or, as you Americans say, Masato Suza. You can call me Masato. I'm very pleased to be your hair designer today. I assume I'm helping the gentleman with the really long hair?"
Kya laughed. "Pleased to meet you. I'm Kyan Douglas. This," he announced, "is your guinea pig, Inuyasha."
"Hi! Pleased to meet you!"
Inuyasha nodded his head cautiously. He's not hitting on me.....It's a miracle.
"Now, from what I hear, you're a little nervous about your haircut. When was the last time you got it cut?" Masato asked, picking up the clump of hair that fell onto Inuyasha's shoulders.
"Um...never," Inuyasha answered.
"I can see that," mused Masato. "Hmm...." he held a piece of Inuyasha's hair up to the light, examining its texture, color and damage.
"Well," the hairstylist began cautiously, "There is obviously too much bulk here. I mean this hair is way way way too long. How long is it exactly when wet?"
"Um, a little past my knees. Almost past my ankles, I guess," Inuyasha answered after a few moments thought.
Masato winced. "Yeah, hair should never ever get to that length. No person can pull off hair like that." He sighed and squeezed Inuyasha's shoulders. "It's gonna have to be cut. A lot."
"How much is a lot?" Inuyasha asked apprehensively
Masato raised his eyebrows. "Oh, I don't know. How about mid-neck?"
Inuyasha blinked. "You want to chop off all my hair until the middle of my neck?"
"Essentially."
"Will I at least have a top knot?" Inuyasha asked, now holding onto his snowy white mane with one clawed hand.
"Top knot?" Masato asked in surprise. "This isn't the Japanese feudal era. You can allow that hairstyle to die its very deserving death." Masato shuddered. Top knots looked good on very few people.
"It has to be enough to fit into a top knot," Inuyasha announced stubbornly.
"But, they're so ugly!" protested Masato.
Kyan sighed and put a restraining hand on Masato's arm. "Don't bother. If he wants a top knot, might as well just give it to him. He'll throw a fit. Or a chair. Or a person." Kyan thought for a moment. "Yeah, he'll definitely throw a person over this issue. Besides, he does have a good reason," Kyan said grudgingly.
Masato gave him a doubting glance. There is no good reason for top knots, his eyes screamed.
Kyan wordlessly pulled off Inuyasha's baseball cap to reveal the furry, pointy ears on the top of his head. Masato gasped.
"That," Kyan said quietly while pointing to the twitching appendages, "is why he doesn't cut his hair or walk around outside without caps."
"Oh Kami-Sama....What, what are they? Are they real?" Masato asked softly.
"Yes, they're real!" Inuyasha snapped. "And they're a...a.....I have these because...." Inuyasha trailed off. What was that excuse Kagome gave? Ah! I don't remember!
"It's a bit of an issue," Kyan said in a whisper to Masato. "He doesn't like to talk about it." Kyan clapped Inuyasha on the shoulder. "It's okay, you don't have to say anything if your not comfortable."
Masato nodded his head. After examining the nervously twitching Inuyasha's head a few more minutes, he clapped his hands decisively. At once, an assistant popped out of nowhere with a notepad and a pen.
"I have found my vision," Masato pronounced. "Attend, Kouchi." The assistant began to write furiously as Masato dictated lengths, angles, certain scissors and different cuts. Kyan nodded thoughtfully, sometimes shaking his head in wonder at Masato's brilliance.
Looking around at the serious hairdressers surrounding him, Inuyasha slumped into his seat. Weirdoes, he thought glumly, I'm surrounded by weirdoes....
The assistant scurried off to gather some extra supplies for his boss. Inuyasha watched him go out of the room with no small amount of jealousy.
"Well, what do you think?" Kyan asked expectantly. Inuyasha glanced up at the smiling American.
"Feh," he muttered. "I have no idea what you're talking about but I know I don't like it."
"Open minded, isn't he?" Masato asked Kyan.
Inuyasha grumbled under his breath as Masato's assistant returned with a tray full of bottles, scissors, combs and brushes, blow driers and other accouterments of the salons.
The assistant nodded firmly and turned to Inuyasha and Kyan. "You," he pointed to Inuyasha. "Follow me."
"Who are you, and where are we going?" Inuyasha asked suspiciously as he slid off the chair and followed the quick paced man to another room.
"I'm Daisuke Kouchi, Masato's personal assistant. You are going to wash your hair."
"What?!? Wash??" Inuyasha turned to Kyan and whined, almost stamping his feet. "That wasn't part of the deal!"
Kyan pushed Inuyasha over to the sink to wash his hair. "Too bad, my badly coifed friend. Washing your hair is necessary. Deal."
Grumbling and muttering, Inuyasha sulked into a chair and grudgingly leaned his head back as commanded. There was silence for a moment.
"How the hell am I suppose to work with this?" came an exasperated shout. Turning, Inuyasha looked down at the sink.
"It's not that bad," soothed Kyan. Kouchi glared back at him and pointed at Inuyasha's head.
"I cannot clean this! I can't even see the god damn sink!" the assistant said fiercely.
"Oh well, no hair cleaning, too bad," Inuyasha said cheerfully, getting up from the chair. Kyan shoved him back down with one hand.
"Stay." Turning to the irate man using the faucet, Kyan made a soothing motion. "It's not so bad, it just takes some extra time."
"I. Can't. See. The. Sink," the man enunciated clearly. Kyan glanced down. It was true. Inuyasha's white hair filled the bowl to the brim, almost touched the faucet itself and formed an avalanche as it cascaded down the sides.
"I just need to chop some off," Kouchi said with a tired sigh. Kyan shook his head. "Masato doesn't let, you know that."
With an annoyed sigh and a mumble about psycho men who let their hair grow, Kouchi grabbed Inuyasha's hair and grimly began cleaning it, piece by piece. The shampoo was scrubbed in and Inuyasha was biting his lip to resist whimpering from the pleasure of having a scalp massage. (A/N: the most addictive of pleasures!! My favorite part about getting a haircut!) The soapy liquid slid down the sides of the basin to drip onto the floor and Kouchi's fingers were sore but, finally, Inuyasha's hair was cleaned. About to hand Inuyasha a towel, Kyan discreetly coughed.
"What?" asked Kouchi.
"You forgot the, um," Kyan winced. "You forgot to do the conditioner," he reminded Kouchi apologetically.
Kouchi's eyes widened. "Conditioner?!" he squawked. "It just took me a good fifteen minutes to wash his hair!" Kouchi glared furiously and thumped his finger into the middle of Kyan's chest. "Now you tell me about conditioner?!?" Kouchi threw down the towel and stamped his foot.
Kyan shrugged helplessly. What else could he say?
"Fine," Kouchi muttered angrily. "Whatever. Work me to death, why don't you?" Picking up the conditioner, Kouchi worked the gentle lotion into Inuyasha's hair, ignoring Inuyasha's cries of "but it smells!!"
Finally, the conditioning was done and Inuyasha was let up. His hair almost dragged on the floor and created a puddle of water around him. Kouchi waved a weary goodbye as Kyan led Inuyasha back to the chair to get his haircut.
Masato was waiting, testing the sharp edge of his favorite scissors. "Sit," he commanded the petulant hanyou in a distracted voice.
Kyan leaned down over Inuyasha's shoulders. "You ready for this?" he asked in excitement.
"No."
"You're going to look like a whole new you!" Kyan squealed.
Inuyasha slumped into the seat and prepared himself.
--------15 minutes later------------
With a final snap of his wrist, Masato flung away the last bit of excess hair from Inuyasha's shoulders. With a deep breath, Masato turned to Kyan. There were tears in his eyes and he whispered in a choked tone, "This is my finest creation. A masterpiece of artistic-"
"Blah blah blah," Inuyasha snapped. "Are we done here?"
Kyan glared at him. "Do you even know what it looks like?"
Inuyasha ran his fingers through his hair and his eyes widened. "My hair!!" he shouted in horror. "It's gone!!!!"
Masato smiled happily. "I know! Snip snip!"
" 'Snip snip?!?!' Kiss my ass, you baka! Where the hells my hair?" Inuyasha snarled.
Masato pointed to the garbage can. Inuyasha saw strands of his long hair trailing out of the lid and threw his hands over his eyes.
"I'm bald!" wailed Inuyasha.
"It's not that bad, you big baby…," Kyan consoled.
Inuyasha grabbed the back of his head. "Look!" he shouted, grasping a pathetic ponytail. "It's shorter then Miroku's ponytail!"
"I don't know who Miroku is but I'm sure your hair being shorter is not a bad thing," Masato said soothingly.
"Yes it is! Kouga's hair is long!" Inuyasha protested with a shout.
"Well, if Kouga's hair is anything like yours, it's too long," Masato said firmly.
"Bald....I'm Miyoga, only taller...," Inuyasha said despondently.
"You haven't even looked at yourself yet!" Kyan reprimanded.
Grumbling, Inuyasha turned to look at himself. His reflection showed a young man with a light tan, strong cheekbones and wide frightened golden eyes. His skull was topped with curling white hair, falling in a gentle mess. It was cut in an angle to end below his chin and wisps of hair fell over his face. Inuyasha watched his ears flick back and forth and, to his shock, could barely see his ears move! The hair was heightened enough that his ears were partially hidden, with just the tips peeking out.
"My ears…," he whispered, reaching through his locks and fingering those appendages. "You, you can't see them…."
"Well, you can," Masato corrected. "But only a bit and most people will just think it's a bit of hair sticking up."
Inuyasha turned to gaze at Kyan with a shocked look. "I look, I, I…I look human." A weird looking human but still human.
Kyan's face reflected his sympathy. Poor guy. He sounds so surprised. "You were always a human looking guy to us," Kyan said firmly.
Inuyasha ignored this well-meant stupidity and turned to Masato with narrowed eyes. "How'd you do that?" he asked, positive that a magical incantation had been performed without his knowledge.
Kyan and Masato laughed. "I am the best," Masato said, chuckling. "My scissors and I are very special..."
Ah, the old 'inanimate-object-gains-demonic-powers-and-becomes-alive' trick, Inuyasha thought in satisfaction, pleased he had figured it out. Wonder if he and Yura knew each other. I don't smell any demon smell but that's probably because my hair smells so much, he thought, sniffing his hair and grimacing.
"That guy made my hair smell," he told Kyan in annoyance.
"Yes, you smell like a rose," Kyan said with a mischievous smile. Inuyasha groaned unhappily.
"Why do you guys think I'm a flower?" he asked Kyan in annoyed confusion. Kyan rolled his eyes and ignored him.
"Come on, say goodbye, we have another stop to make," Kyan said, bowing in Masato's direction. Inuyasha snorted and turned his head away.
"Feh. You chopped off my hair," he muttered, not realizing he sounded much like sulking Shippo.
"I know. You're welcome," Masato replied with a smile.
"Moron! I wasn't thanking you!" shouted Inuyasha.
"Doesn't he look cute now when he yells?" Kyan said with a wide smile. "Ah, you just want to pinch his cheeks!"
"Don't you dare," Inuyasha warned.
"We need to go. Thank you, Masato-sama," Kyan said. Spotting Inuyasha by a trash bin where the miserable hanyou was trying to stuff pieces of shorn hair into his pockets, Kyan sighed explosively. Grabbing Inuyasha on his way out, Kyan led the way to their next appointment.
Jogging a few minutes away, Inuyasha and Kyan came to another store.
"Last stop!" Kyan announced and Inuyasha breathed a sigh of relieve. "We're going to just fix-"
"Again? Haven't we fixed enough?" Inuyasha asked a little desperately.
"Hush! Just come!"
The two went into the store and Kyan confirmed their appointment. Inuyasha sniffed in confusion. The oddest smells were assaulting his nose and he couldn't think of what they meant.
There was the saline smell of tears, the unique scent of ripped flesh and mixed into that was the odor of burned meat. Added into that was the scent of wax but not from any flower or tree he knew of.
Weird, Inuyasha thought to himself. Better keep an eye out, he concluded and clicked open his Tessuiga.
Kyan purposefully ignored this. Striding along, Kyan beckoned Inuyasha to follow him.
"Now Inuyasha," Kyan began, "You know that looking good is important-"
"Do I now?" Inuyasha said sarcastically. Kyan ignored him and continued as if he had never been interrupted.
"-and so this next little thing shouldn't make you nervous at all."
Inuyasha's eyebrows furrowed. He did not like how that sounded.
"What're you talkin' about?" he began, suspicion lacing every syllable. Next to him a door sung open and Inuyasha cut off his own words, horrified by what he saw.
Beyond the doorway laid a young girl, no older then Kagome, on a white table. A middle-aged woman saw leaning over her and pouring hot wax on the girls eyes and forehead!!
Stunned and horrified (hadn't Kagome told him that torture was not allowed in her era?), Inuyasha was frozen as the seemingly innocent older woman systematically began ripping the girl's skin off with a piece of paper! The girl winced and that was what sprung Inuyasha into action.
"Bitch!" Inuyasha shouted as he leapt through the doorway. Ignoring the shocked expressions on the waxing woman, the customer and Kyan's faces, Inuyasha snatched the girl up into his arms and escaped to safety beyond the terrifying grasp of the harpy.
"Are you okay? What's your name?" he asked the girl gruffly, knowing better then to take his eyes off his enemy, especially one who had proven herself so sadistic.
"Um, yeah, I'm fine. My name's Ryudoh, Juna," the girl stammered looking up at her handsome savior.
"What are you doing?!?" an aghast Kayn wailed, almost pulling out his hair.
"I'm rescuing this girl!" Inuyasha shouted back.
"Listen Don Juan-!!" Kyan shouted in exasperation.
I didn't really need rescuing, Juna thought giddily. I'm a feminist after all.....She looked up at Inuyasha's eyes, their amber color darkened to a deep honey in his rage. Oooh, but for this piece of meat- no! Women do not need to be rescued, this is not the 1900's, stay strong, stay strong, stay strong....
"Shut up! You can argue with me after I kill that other woman!" Inuyasha snapped.
"Say what?!?, gasped the poor waxer, still in shock from having her 5 o'clock appointment 'saved'.
"His meds are off, that's all," Kyan soothed her. "Soon, he'll be as docile as a kitten."
"With rabies!" the terrified woman snapped back.
"Despicable witch!" Inuyasha snarled. "Torturing innocent young maidens! I won't allow it!"
"She is not torturing that girl! She waxes people for a living!" Kyan tried to explain.
"I know! I saw!" Inuyasha said. Gently, he placed the maiden on the linoleum floor. She blinked up at him, dazed and thrilled. "I'm going to make sure she never hurts you again," he said softly.
I'm a feminist I'm a feminist I'm a feminist, Juna thought, desperately trying to hold onto her beliefs. Inuyasha looked down at her, all righteous indignation and fascinating looks, and gave her a firm nod.
Oh, what the hell! "Oh, thank you!" Juna gushed. The waxing lady and Kyan both stared at Juna as she threw her arms around Inuyasha's knees. "I was so scared!" she wailed pathetically.
"See?" Inuyasha asked Kyan, pointing at the girl.
"She's acting! She wasn't really hurt!" Kyan protested.
"Why would she be acting?" Inuyasha asked.
"Because you're hot!" Kyan explained in a loud voice.
The waxing lady tried to inch away but Inuyasha jumped and blocked her path. Drawing Tessuiga, he placed the blade at the crying woman's pulse point. "I prefer to know the names of the people I kill," Inuyasha said in a taunting voice.
"I-I-Izaki, Mayumi...," the waxer sobbed.
Juna watched from the sidelines in growing horror. Oh my god, he was serious! I have to stop him! For a moment, she reflected how every guy she was interested in was a crazy psycho. Maybe its me, she thought despondently. I inspire weirdness or something.
"Hey! Stop that!" Juna called out, walking to Mayumi's side.
Inuyasha looked at the no longer crying maiden and got a sinking suspicion.
"She's my waxing lady, don't hurt her!" Juna declared.
"Yeah!" shouted Mayumi from behind the protective shield of Juna's body. "She paid a good 5,000 yen for that 'torture'!"
"You paid her to pour hot wax on your skin and tear it off while you weren't drunk?" Inuyasha asked.
Juna, Kyan and Mayumi all nodded.
Women are weird, Inuyasha concluded. But he hadn't thought it was to this extent….
Inuyasha looked suspiciously at the girl. "You paid money to have someone torture you?" he asked slowly.
Juna nodded again and Inuyasha crossed his arms trying to understand this. His eyes widened as he recalled a very uncomfortable conversation he had had once with Kagome. Rushing over to the hairstylist traveling with him, Inuyasha grabbed Kyan's arm. Pulling him close, Inuyasha whispered loudly, "Kayn? Is she a sadist?"
Juna and Mayumi both squawked at the same time. "Nani?!?!"
"No, Inuyasha," Kyan sighed. "She's not a sadist."
"Why is it all the cute guys think I'm weird?" Juna asked Mayumi in despair. The waxing woman, aware of Juna's dating problems as only a woman's waxer/manicurist could be, patted Juna on the hand.
"There there, you don't need him or any of them. They're all insensitive jerks anyhow," Mayumi consoled.
"Feh," Inuyasha snorted. Turning to Kyan, Inuyasha confronted him. "So what are we doing here?"
Kyan, Mayumi and Juna all looked at the small forest above Inuyasha's eyes and watched as the brows slowly rose in comprehension.
"Oh no," Inuyasha said warily, backing away from the three. "No no no no…."
"It doesn't hurt that much," Juna said with a mean smile. "Really, its like a pin prick."
"Doesn't hurt for more then a moment," Mayumi chimed in, inching toward the quivering hanyou.
"And Mayumi will be really gentle," Kyan added in.
The three walked toward Inuyasha and he stumbled backward.
Wait a minute, who can kick whose ass here? Inuyasha stopped and glared. "I am not getting waxed."
"Oh, but you are," Kyan corrected, latching onto Inuyasha's arm.
"Oh no, I'm not," Inuyasha snapped. "Stop pulling at me, I'm not doing this!"
Relentlessly, the three shoved Inuyasha into the waxing room. As soon as he was in, Kyan turned and locked the door, trusting that Inuyasha's remarkable lack of technological knowledge would stop his escape.
It worked. Inuyasha tried and tried but was unable to open the door. "Fine!" Unsheathing Tessuiga, Inuyasha raised the mighty sword above his head, fully prepared to slice his way to safety.
"No!" Kyan shouted. "How about we make a deal?"
Inuyasha glanced at him. "I'm listening…."
"I'll get waxed and once you see it doesn't hurt, you'll do it."
"No."
"Why not?" Kyan asked. "It's fair!"
"As if I cared."
Stumped, Kyan thought for a second. "Okay, but you don't want anyone to think you were scared do you?"
"What? I'm not scared!" Inuyasha shouted, his testosterone overwhelming his common sense (A/N: what else is new?)
Gotcha! Kyan thought smugly. "Well, no one will know if you do it. But if you don't wax, well, I hate to think up what Carson would say when he discovered that you chickened out…."
"You wouldn't!" Inuyasha gasped.
"Oh, but I would."
"Shit!" Inuyasha was torn. Do the sensible thing and run and be labeled a coward? Or let himself be tortured and be brave?
"My boyfriend does it," Juna said casually. "He's a real man too."
"I'm a real man!" Inuyasha protested.
"Prove it," Mayumi cooed and held up the waxing wand. It steamed, the smoke curling in the air.
Inuyasha gulped. He knew he should leave but, damn it! He was a man and he wouldn't run from anything!
Hopping onto the waxing table he laid back and glared at Mayumi. "Do your worst," he challenged.
"Oh I will," she promised darkly. "I will…."
------------2 minutes later--------
"AARRGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!" A bloodcurdling scream echoed through the salon.
"Oh, don't be such a baby," Mayumi mumbled, preparing another strip.
One side of Inuyasha's head had just been robbed of all its skin. In place, he was sure, was fire, acidic demonic fire, eating away at his skull. Rolling into the fetal position, Inuyasha cradled his aching cranium, on the verge of tears.
"My ears are ringing," Juna complained.
"That went better then I thought," Kyan said cheerfully.
Inuyasha, preoccupied with his current agony, didn't notice the other strip descending until it was too late.
"Take it off!' Inuyasha wailed.
"Oh, take it like a man," joked Juna.
"I'm not a man!" Inuyasha shouted, broken by the extraordinary pain of getting his eyebrows waxed.
"Yes you are, you're a very brave boy for doing this. Lesser males would have cracked under this, I swear." Kyan soothed.
"Ready?" Mayumi asked.
"No!" Inuyasha answered quickly.
"Wanna hold something? Sometimes that helps me," Juna asked.
"Yeah, Kyan's throat," Inuyasha snarled.
"How about I hold your hand?" Juna offered but Kyan snatched her to safety.
"Bad idea," he whispered. In a louder tone, Kyan offered Inuyasha a chair to squeeze.
"Just grab that if it hurts," Kyan explained.
"1…..2………," Mayumi paused again. "………2.5……………2.45……..."
"Just do it, you crazy psychotic bi- SHIT!!!!"
With a snap, the wooden chair splintered into thousands of little pieces as Inuyasha's eyebrows got tended to.
"Well," Kyan said as the room stopped echoing Inuyasha's scream, "Now all we have to do is-"
"Nothing!" Inuyasha shouted. "We are doing nothing!"
"Come on, just finish it up," Kyan begged.
"No, we are finished," Inuyasha hissed, sitting up on the table and rubbing his sore head.
"Just let me pluck a few stray hairs," Mayumi mumbled. Suddenly, she found herself pinned up against the wall.
"Bitch, you touch me again, I'm having old lady sushi tonight, get me?" Inuyasha threatened, shining his claws in front of her eyes.
"Yep, totally clear," Mayumi squeaked.
Inuyasha let the waxer slide down the wall and turned to Kyan. "Let's go," he ordered.
Striding through the salon, Inuyasha ignored everyone surrounding him until he was safely outside.
Slouching against the SUV, Inuyasha waited for Kyan. The stylist came out and Inuyasha tossed him the keys.
"Oi, drive to chow," Inuyasha commanded. "I need chow now."
"You were a bad boy," Kyan reprimanded and leaned against the salon's brick wall. "I don't think you earned your chow-"
Inuyasha slammed his fist next to Kyan and pulverized brick exploded into the air. Inuyasha leaned in close and whispered angrily, "You better rethink that."
Kyan glanced at the fist shaped crater in the salon wall and rethought his opinion. "Chow it is," he said agreeably.
Inuyasha grunted and jumped into the SUV.
After eating what Kyan called a "truly disgusting amount of food," Inuyasha was in a much more amicable mood. Back in the SUV, Inuyasha relaxed against the leather seat and closed his eyes. Breathing deep, he asked where they were going.
"Home, to show off what we did today," Kyan replied. "And so they can show us what they've done with the well house. You excited?"
Inuyasha opened one eye. "I don't get excited. But I'm interested to see how much you guys screwed up."
Kyan glared.
"Just joking," Inuyasha said, holding up his hands in the mercy position. But, he had to wonder, just what the hell would he be coming back to?
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A/N: well, there you go. Hope that haircutting didn't upset too many people. The guy needed a haircut, I'm sorry. A couple of things:
Hair Snob is an actual salon in the Tokyo area. It has a very cool web site:
jp/(The link will probally not work, cut and paste it) Just go to see a really well done web design or if you want to see pictures of the two real life stylist I mentioned, go to Staff Section and there you'll see in Snob eXcut: Masato Sazu and by Rotation: Daisuke Kouchi. They're both cute! (hehe, how perverted?)
If you want to see a picture of Inuyasha's haircut or how I imagined it in my mind:
http:www.theorlandobloomfiles. com/pictures/ magazine/hq03april3. jpg
Yes, I realize it's Orlando Bloom, but I swear I hadn't realized until I copied the url. I actually pictured it a little longer then his here but imagine sexy Inu wearing a black ski cap, his snowy white locks just escaping the hat, slouching against a wall in jeans and pissed off expression!! ::faints:: love my bad angry men!
Remember to take out spaces!!
Why this was so late: I decided to transfer out of my current college so I sent in my transcripts, both from high school and college. One problem-My freakin' high school forgot to send in my college transcripts to my new college!! But I had already canceled out of the one I was in SO I WASN'T IN COLLEGE FOR FALL!!!!!!!!!!!!! Then I got a letter from my old college with a bill. I go to find out what the hell is going on and it turns out that classes I had canceled out of were never put into the computer so I got a Never Attended on two classes on my transcripts- that looks terrible! And then, in order to get transcripts so I could apply elsewhere, I had to pay for those flippin classes I never took! I freaked out about all the above and was completely preoccupied with it. In the end, I'm in college (thank God!!!) but only after spending a wasted 1200 dollars on transcripts fees. A little less then pleased. So that's why it took me such a long time.
Hopefully, the next chapter will be quicker but, no promises.
Next Chapter: Inuyasha sees how everything turned out and let's just say, art is in the eye of the beholder……