Chapter 12
The Regret
Rory awoke with a start. She glanced over to see a sleeping Logan to her left and turned to read the clock: 3:14am. She was on the verge of tears thinking about the night before. She had only been with one other man, and that had taken years to come about. She had slept with Logan after only dating him for three days! She needed her mother; she needed to talk to her now.
Rory silently inched her way off the bed, careful not to wake up Logan. She grabbed her phone from the bedside table, and silently scurried to the bathroom. She shut the door and dialed the comforting number.
"Whoever this is, it had better be a life or death situation, because I have not had any caffeine, and it is 3 in the morning!" Her mom yelled.
"Mom." Rory's voice was shaking.
Lorelai sat up in bed after hearing her daughter's scared voice. "Rory? What happened?" Lorelai said, completely awake with fear.
"I think I did something stupid." Rory said, now letting the tears fall.
"What? Rory, what is going on? Talk to me." Lorelai said nearly frantic.
"I slept with Logan." Rory tried to explain.
"Oh." Rory could hear the disappointment in her mother's voice. "Rory, you are an adult, you can make your own decisions. Were you at least safe?"
"Yes, we were safe…but I think it was a mistake." Rory said, all out bawling now.
"Why do you think that honey?" Lorelai said, not wanting to yell at her for sleeping with a guy so soon after dating him.
"Mom, we have only been together for three days! I like him a lot, but I rushed into it. I guess after seeing Jess I was just so confused and I just wanted to be held." Rory said.
"Hold on. You saw Jess!" Lorelai was shocked by the new developments.
"Yes, we ran into him at a bookstore. He was angry at me, and I was upset. I spent most of the night talking to Logan about everything…Dean, Jess, Dean again, and he did not judge me and he was not disappointed, he just listened. I felt so close to him that I was convinced that sleeping with him would be okay. I felt more for him than I think I ever felt for both Dean and Jess combined." Rory said, confusing herself even further.
"Honey, you can't change what you did, but you should be talking to Logan about it. I am a little disappointed that you did it, but I am glad that you realize you made a mistake and you want to change it. Don't let this get in between you two, I think you will be good for each other." Lorelai tried helping.
"I don't know if I will be able to look at him! I am so ashamed of myself. I am not like this mom. You know me. I have only ever been with Dean, and I was with him for two years." Rory said, continuing to punish herself.
"Rory, stop beating yourself up over this. I don't even blame you, I met Logan. Just sit down and talk to him about all of this. I am not mad at you. I love you so much, and I have made my fair share of mistakes too." Lorelai said, wanting to go to her daughter and hug her.
"Okay mom. Thanks for listening. I will call you tomorrow." Rory said, hanging up the phone.
With that she heard a knock on the door. "Rory, are you okay?" Logan said gently.
"Umm, sniff yeah, I think I will be okay." She said, climbing to her feet and going to the door.
Logan took one look at her tear streaked face and embraced her in a hug. "Are you okay Ace?" Logan asked.
"No!" Rory said, letting the tears fall again.
"What happened? What can I do?" Logan asked intently.
"I…umm…Logan…we need to talk." Rory said finally.
"Sure, anything." Logan said, walking her back over to the couch.
Logan held her hand as she started talking. "Logan, I care about you so much. I just think that maybe we rushed into things way too fast." Rory said, avoiding making eye contact with him.
Logan reached over and tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear and raised her chin so their eyes met. "Rory, I was afraid that we were too. I just wanted to be with you so much, that I did not care about the timing of it all. I have never felt this way about anybody before. In the short period of time that I have known you, you have pushed me far beyond anyone else. I am sorry that you think we took things too fast, and if I could change things, I would take it back in a second, but the truth is that we can't. I don't regret it, but I do regret that you wish it had not happened." Logan said tearing up himself.
"We are so pathetic!" Rory said with a little laugh.
"Do you want to start over?" Logan asked hopefully. "I don't want this to come in between you and me."
"I don't either. I really care about you, I just wished we had waited. I mean…three days!" Rory said.
"Yeah, I know." Logan said. "How about you go back to sleep in my old room and I will go to my parents and we can see how things look in the morning?" Logan suggested.
"Okay. Thanks Logan." She said slowly getting up off the couch. Logan gave her one last hug before he left to go back to his own room.
As Logan drifted off to sleep he could not help but shed a few tears. He was afraid that he let his attraction to Rory ruin one of the best things he had going in his life. He punched his pillow in frustration. He knew that Rory had been extremely emotional that night, and her confusion after seeing Jess had clouded her better judgment, but it was far too late.
Similar thoughts befuddled Rory. She hoped that their relationship would be left on fragile grounds now. She was afraid that because she made the decision to sleep with Logan nothing would return back to normal. She had no idea what was to come.
The soft sunlight woke Rory the next morning. She blinked through the bright light and examined the clock waiting for her eyes to adjust to the morning. 11:00am. She could not believe that she had slept so late. She sighed and threw her legs over the side of her bed. She slowly made her way to the bathroom to wash up before facing Logan. She glanced at herself in the mirror. Her eyes resembled raccoon's with dark circles from the previous day's makeup. She rinsed her face off and made her way to find Logan.
She was greeted by the strong scent of coffee and pankcakes, two of her favorite smells.
Logan saw her making her way to the kitchen, and he greeted her with a small kiss and told her he had a surprise.
"What could be better than breakfast and coffee?" Rory asked, nearly forgetting about the night before.
"Well, you will have to taste breakfast." Logan said, not wanting to give it all away.
Rory looked confused, but nodded her head. She looked at the nearly perfect pancake in front of her and cut off a section and took a bite. She let the taste consume her mouth. Something about the pancakes was hard to place, it was so familiar. "These are delicious." Rory said.
"I figured you would like them." Logan said with a smile. "Here, have some coffee." Logan said, pushing a nearly overflowing mug towards her.
"Wow, you know me too well." Rory said, raising the mug to her lips. She closed her eyes with extascy as the warm liquid made its way through her. There was no way of confusing the taste of this coffee. "How did you get it?" She asked excitedly.
"I have my connections" Logan said with an air of mysteriousness.
"Please tell me you did not drive all the way to Stars Hallow just to get me breakfast from Luke's!" Rory said grinning from ear to ear.
"No, I did not have to go all the way there. Let's just say that your friend Lane is a great help." Logan said smiling.
"You are the greatest!" Rory said, giving him another kiss. She could not believe that he had went through so much trouble for her.
"I have to make a quick phone call." Rory said, walking back to her room after finishing the delicious breakfast.
"Take your time, I did not plan on us going to the museum until 3pm anyway." Logan said.
Again Rory dialed her Mother's number. Lorelai had been waiting for this call since the night before.
"RORY, what is going on? How are you?" Lorelai said.
"Mom, things are great. After I hung up from you I talked to Logan. He said he was worried that things had gone too fast as well, and he was sorry about taking it so fast. He was so understanding, I think he almost cried!" Rory said.
"He cried! Rory, that is darling. I think this one is a keeper!" Lorelai said.
"That is not the best part. This morning when I woke up he had breakfast waiting for me." Rory started.
"Nice, he knows the way to your heart is through food." Lorelai said.
"It gets better Mom, it was from Luke's!" Rory finished.
"LUKE'S? How did he get it?" She asked.
"He mentioned something about Lane helping him, but he was extremely vague about it all." Rory said.
"Wow, this guy is amazing. If I were not dating Luke I think I would make the move on him!" Lorelai said laughing. "So I take it things are going to be okay now?"
"We have not really talked about it, but I really hope so. I just want to go back to how things were before today. I don't want there to be any awkwardness between the two of us." Rory said.
"Well, it looks like he is really trying."
"I know. I have a feeling that things will be okay." Rory said.
"I am very releaved. I don't think I ever got back to sleep after you hung up." Lorelai said.
"I am sorry I called so late Mom, I just really needed you."
"Hey kid, that is what I am here for." Her mom said.
"Okay, well I should get going. I love you mom." Rory said.
"I love you too Rory." Lorelai said hanging up.
Rory walked back to the kitchen with a smile on her face. Logan saw her grinning and spoke first. "So are we okay?"
"We are more than okay." Rory said grabbing him for a kiss. She deepened the kiss, running her fingers through his hair as she slipped her tongue into his mouth. Logan was the first to step back gasping for air. "I will start bringing you Luke's for breakfast from now on if that is the reaction it is going to get." He said smiling.
"You never cease to amaze me Huntzberger." She said smiling.
"And you Gilmore." Logan said returning her grin. "I picked something up for you while I was out."
"How long have you been up Logan?" Rory asked in shock.
"I could not really sleep last night." Logan said, shifting his eyes. He did not want to talk about what had happened, he just wanted to move things forward.
"Oh okay." Rory said, not wanting to push it herself.
"It is on the couch." Logan said pointing to her gift.
Rory made her way to the living room to inspect this gift. She noticed a large box sitting on the couch and assumed that this had to be what he was talking about. She looked up to him with a confused expression altering her beautiful features. "Go ahead." Logan said.
Rory opened the box revealing a beautiful ball gown. The dress was an amazing shade of blue highlighted with a pearly white edging. The sleeveless gown was one of the most exquisite dress she had ever seen.
"Why Logan, what do you have planned?" She asked wide eyed.
"Be patient Rory, you will see…"