Funerals
By: Jade O'Neal
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters. They belong to DC Comics, Warner Bros, Cartoon Network, and others. Spoilers: If you didn't know that Hawkgirl and Green Lantern are an item...now you do. Rating: PG, PG-13 Whatever. You're going to read it anyway. Notes: I don't read comic books, but I have an idea of what pretty much goes on because of the animated series. I don't know if Hawkman dies in the comics, and if he doesn't...I don't care. It's my story. So there.
*This takes place years from where the cartoon series is now...*
~8~
Hawkgirl took in a deep breath and watched those who had come to pay their respects file into the crowded room. Most of the people were comrades and friends of Hawkman's, but there were others there who did not know him very well.
Keeping a strong expression on her face and trying to hide her sorrow, Hawkgirl greeted the guests as they arrived.
Some saluted her. Some just nodded. Some didn't do a thing.
Funerals were strange things, and she hated them.
"Shayera?" Superman's voice said to get her attention.
She couldn't help but smile as tears came to her eyes.
"Clark?" She hugged him, and immediately felt comforted when his strong arms embraced her in return. "Thank you so much for coming."
"How are you holding up?"
After pulling away from him, she shrugged. "As well as a widow could."
Wonder Woman came in next with Batman beside her. Hawkgirl really wanted to cry now. She had missed her teammates so much.
"Diana," she muttered and embraced the Amazon Princess.
"I'm so sorry for your loss." The brunette lightly kissed Hawkgirl's cheek and gently stroked her red hair.
Shayera nodded, and let go of Diana to look at Batman. He seemed the same, except the suit had altered a bit. He looked good.
Knowing he wasn't about to hug her, she just said, "Batman."
"Hawkgirl."
"Thanks for being here."
"Think nothing of it."
She slightly smiled and adjusted her mask. Shayera swallowed loudly and sighed.
"Where are the rest of the –?"
"Right here, babe," The Flash's voice interrupted. He raced to her and grinned. "Miss me?"
"Like a hole in the head." She pulled him into a hug as a sob escaped her throat. "God, Wally. You're all grown up."
"Yeah. That happens." He lightly kissed her on the cheek, like Diana had, and then stepped back.
The Martian came to join them next. He greeted her in his monotone voice and placed a hand on her bare shoulder. "Shayera, is there anything we can do for you?"
She shook her head. "No J'onn, but I'd like you all to sit with me in the first row. You're the closest thing I have to a real family anyway."
"We'll meet you up there," Superman confirmed.
Hawkgirl watched them leave her and couldn't help but wonder if John was coming... or if he forgotten her. Just because they had something years ago didn't mean that he'd come to see her when she needed him most. How could she expect that of him? He probably had found someone new.
Someone who would treat him right.
"Shy?" The Green Lantern said as he slowly came to her.
Her eyes glittered with tears as she took in a hopeful breath. He was so gorgeous. Hawkgirl had forgotten how his presence made her palms sweat.
"John?" she choked out and waited for him to wrap his arms around her.
For the first time in a long time, she felt safe and at peace. His arms had always had that effect on her. She never wanted him to let go.
The tears fell as she told, "Thank you for coming. I – I thought that you wouldn't be here."
"No. I'm here, Shy. I'm here." He ran his fingers through her locks, and she closed her eyes as he did.
When he pulled away, she found herself almost resisting. She needed John to hold her.
Shayera had needed John for a long time.
Maybe even before her husband had passed.
"The ceremony is about to begin. The others are already up there," she stated.
~8~
The Green Lantern placed a cup of coffee in front of Shayera and sat down beside her. The Justice League had stayed at her place long after all the other guests had left. They knew she needed to be with people she felt at home with, people who truly cared for her.
"So when are you going to visit us, Shy?" Wally asked the winged redhead and sipped his mocha. "You still have to meet Linda."
"That's right. You haven't met Linda yet," Diana confirmed.
"Who is this Linda?" Hawkgirl asked.
"Flash's wife. Can you believe it?" John laughed and winked in Wally's direction.
Hawkgirl even managed a chuckled. "Wife? You're married?"
"Yeah. Who knew?"
"What about the rest of you? Anyone else tie the knot while I was away?" Shayera asked, trying not to sound too obvious to John. He had a feeling that she was interested in his personal life alone.
Superman spoke up, "Well, I proposed to Lois a couple of months ago."
"Really? That's great. I assume she said yes."
"She did," Batman interrupted. "Of course, I had to talk her into it."
"Ha ha," Clark said dryly.
She moved her attention to Batman. "What about you, Bruce? Is there a lady at Wayne Manor?"
"Not quite yet."
"J'onn and Diana. How are your love lives?"
The princess blew her hair out of her eyes and shook her head as she said, "I think I'll pass."
"As will I," J'onn told.
"Fine." Shayera sipped her black coffee and bit her bottom lip. John could sense that she was nervous for some odd reason.
"Johnny isn't seeing anyone," Wally remarked. "Are you, GL?"
Lantern sent a glare in the kid's direction. What made him think that he was in charge of John and Shayera's futures, especially when her husband had just died? Flash was way out of line.
Batman noticed the uneasiness and saved the conversation by asking Hawkgirl if she needed the group to stay for the night. She declined, but that was no surprise.
Twenty minutes later, the gang was ready to leave. They had said her goodbyes and were about to walk to the Javelin.
"Honestly, I think we should have someone stay with her," Diana shared. "She's hurting right now. You all saw her; she's hiding the pain."
"Who wants to stay?" Flash asked. "You, Princes?"
"No," John firmly told. "I'll stay. I know her best. I'll catch up with you all in a day or so."
"Wait, John. Is that really a good idea?" Superman questioned. "No offense, but you are her ex. What if things get out of hand? What if –?"
"Nothing will happen, but if something does, I'll handle it. I promise."
The others nodded and walked away from him, but J'onn stayed behind.
"She wants you to talk to her," he told. "So take care of her. She needs you."
"Thanks."
~8~
"What are you still doing here?" Shayera asked when she saw John step into her kitchen. "I thought you were all leaving."
"They left. I decided to stay."
"But I clearly explained why I didn't need anyone to baby-sit me."
"Yeah, but you're stubborn. Deal." GL sat down at the table and narrowed his glowing eyes.
"What?"
"Do you really want me to go?"
"No, I don't." She sat down across from him and ran a hand through her hair.
"Shy, do you want to talk about it? About him?"
She looked away from John and at her hands. Shayera shook her head. She didn't want to be miserable; she didn't want to face all the pain and sadness. John didn't need to hear all that from her.
"You've been holding it all inside. That's not healthy," he stated softly. "Please, Shy. Don't do this."
"Do what? I haven't done a thing." She once again raised her eyes to meet his. "I didn't even cry, John. I haven't cried in years. Now, is that normal? Is it normal for a widow to not grieve for her dead husband?"
He didn't answer her.
"You know, it's my fault that he was killed in battle. I didn't cover him like I should have. I wasn't fast enough."
"Don't blame yourself."
"I was his backup, the only one who could've saved him..." She closed her green eyes and swallowed over the lump in her throat. "I'm a terrible wife and a terrible detective."
"No you're not," he assured. "Listen to me. You –"
"No! I am, John! I could've saved him, but I didn't. Something inside of me wanted him gone, wanted him dead... Something inside wanted to be free, and it knew that he had to die for that to happen." Hawkgirl could feel her hands start to shake, so she asked Lantern to get her a shot of scotch from the cabinet behind him.
He did as requested and poured himself one as well.
~8~
"You didn't want him dead. Your mind is making you feel guilty; it's playing tricks with your emotions," GL stated as she swallowed another shot. "You cared about him."
She shook her head again. "John, I was unfaithful to him."
"What?"
"I didn't sleep around, if that's what you're wondering," she explained. "I mean, when we made love... I found myself dreaming of someone else. I pretended that it was your arms I was lying in... that it was you who was loving me."
The Green Lantern couldn't breath. "You don't know what you're saying. You're drunk."
"No, not yet." Shayera laughed and poured another shot. "But I'm getting there."
"You left me for him, Shy. You loved him."
"Did I? Enlighten me, John. Tell me that I made the right choice. Explain why I wanted to be a warrior, a sidekick, instead of a partner and a friend? Huh?"
She stood from the table and threw the glass across the room, smashing it against the wall.
"Tell me that he loved me in return, John! Tell me I wasn't just another soldier! Tell me that I mattered!" Shayera shouted. "Please? Can you make sense of it? Any of it?"
He watched with tears forming in his eyes as she slipped to the floor and curled up in a ball, covering her shoulders with her beautiful wings. John got out of his chair and sat down next to her. Gently, he touched her forearm, and she flinched.
He didn't back away.
"It's okay now, Shy. I'm here." He carefully pulled her closer to himself and held her trembling body as she sobbed.
"I'm so sorry," she cried. "I am, John. Really, I am. I'm a terrible person. I always have been. He didn't deserve someone like me. He deserved someone so much better. I never made him happy."
"Shh... You're wonderful, and he knew that." He smoothed her hair and kissed her temple. "I've got you. You're okay now."
~8~
Shayera woke to the aroma of breakfast flooding the air. She sat up, with a struggle, and made her way out of her bedroom and to her kitchen. John was cooking.
"Good morning," he greeted with a smile. "Hungry?"
"Not particularly." She sat down at the table and groaned. "My head feels like an elephant had trampled over it... twice."
"I'm sorry to hear that, but I made pancakes and a fresh pot of coffee." GL set the breakfast before her and poured two cups of java.
"You didn't have to."
"Yeah I did. What are friends for if not feeding each other?" When she smiled, his grin grew.
"What do you think of me now, John? Do you –"
"Think that you are one of the most intelligent, compassionate, courageous, and beautiful people I've ever met?" he finished. "I do, for your information."
"But I –"
"You're feeling guilty. That's normal. You're seeing all the bad and forgetting all the good in the relationship with your husband. You two cared about one another. I know it, and so do you."
John reached across the table and took hold of her hand. His touch was so warm and caring. She had missed it, despite all his conclusions.
"So what do I do?" she questioned.
"What do you want to do?"
~8~
"Welcome back, Hawkgirl!" Flash yelled and hugged the redhead. "The JLA is back in major kick-ass, mace business!"
"Thanks, Wally."
GL watched the others talk to her as they sipped their drinks. The family was finally whole again. This time, no one would tear them apart.
"I'll help you settle in," Diana said and took hold of Shy's elbow. "I'm sure you must be exhausted."
"Uh, yeah. Goodnight boys."
"Goodnight," the men answered together.
John finished his Champaign and sat down on the couch. Wally immediately joined him.
"How'd you get her to come back?" he asked, innocently. "I kinda figured that she'd want to stay away from us."
"No. She was the one who mentioned returning."
Superman sat down across from them. "Do you think this is the right choice? Isn't she running away from her problems?"
"She's a grown woman, Clark," Batman interrupted. "Let her make those decisions."
Lantern shook his head. "She hasn't run away from her problems; they're inside of her."
J'onn nodded in agreement. "Yes. Shayera has been torn up on the inside. The death of her husband has truly shaken her."
"So what you're saying is that Hawkgirl needs help?" Flash concluded with a confused face.
"Something like that," John assured.
~8~
There was a knock at Shayera's bedroom door, so she walked up to it.
"Who is it?" she quietly asked.
"It's John."
She opened the door and saw a half-naked GL standing in her doorway; all he wore was a pair of drawstring sweats.
Shayera wasn't too far behind, wearing only a skin-colored nightgown.
"I saw your light... I wanted to check on you," he explained. "Is something wrong? Can't you sleep?"
"I just wanted to finish unpacking tonight," she explained.
He nodded and sighed. "Do you need anything?"
"No. Thank you, though."
The former marine flashed a small smile and turned away, but she grabbed his shoulder.
"Yeah, Shy?"
The redhead gently touched her lips to his cheek and said, "Thank you for coming back for me."
John's dark eyes seemed to sparkle. "Get some rest. We might have stuff to deal with in the morning."
She slightly grinned. "I hope so."
~THE END~
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters. They belong to DC Comics, Warner Bros, Cartoon Network, and others. Spoilers: If you didn't know that Hawkgirl and Green Lantern are an item...now you do. Rating: PG, PG-13 Whatever. You're going to read it anyway. Notes: I don't read comic books, but I have an idea of what pretty much goes on because of the animated series. I don't know if Hawkman dies in the comics, and if he doesn't...I don't care. It's my story. So there.
*This takes place years from where the cartoon series is now...*
~8~
Hawkgirl took in a deep breath and watched those who had come to pay their respects file into the crowded room. Most of the people were comrades and friends of Hawkman's, but there were others there who did not know him very well.
Keeping a strong expression on her face and trying to hide her sorrow, Hawkgirl greeted the guests as they arrived.
Some saluted her. Some just nodded. Some didn't do a thing.
Funerals were strange things, and she hated them.
"Shayera?" Superman's voice said to get her attention.
She couldn't help but smile as tears came to her eyes.
"Clark?" She hugged him, and immediately felt comforted when his strong arms embraced her in return. "Thank you so much for coming."
"How are you holding up?"
After pulling away from him, she shrugged. "As well as a widow could."
Wonder Woman came in next with Batman beside her. Hawkgirl really wanted to cry now. She had missed her teammates so much.
"Diana," she muttered and embraced the Amazon Princess.
"I'm so sorry for your loss." The brunette lightly kissed Hawkgirl's cheek and gently stroked her red hair.
Shayera nodded, and let go of Diana to look at Batman. He seemed the same, except the suit had altered a bit. He looked good.
Knowing he wasn't about to hug her, she just said, "Batman."
"Hawkgirl."
"Thanks for being here."
"Think nothing of it."
She slightly smiled and adjusted her mask. Shayera swallowed loudly and sighed.
"Where are the rest of the –?"
"Right here, babe," The Flash's voice interrupted. He raced to her and grinned. "Miss me?"
"Like a hole in the head." She pulled him into a hug as a sob escaped her throat. "God, Wally. You're all grown up."
"Yeah. That happens." He lightly kissed her on the cheek, like Diana had, and then stepped back.
The Martian came to join them next. He greeted her in his monotone voice and placed a hand on her bare shoulder. "Shayera, is there anything we can do for you?"
She shook her head. "No J'onn, but I'd like you all to sit with me in the first row. You're the closest thing I have to a real family anyway."
"We'll meet you up there," Superman confirmed.
Hawkgirl watched them leave her and couldn't help but wonder if John was coming... or if he forgotten her. Just because they had something years ago didn't mean that he'd come to see her when she needed him most. How could she expect that of him? He probably had found someone new.
Someone who would treat him right.
"Shy?" The Green Lantern said as he slowly came to her.
Her eyes glittered with tears as she took in a hopeful breath. He was so gorgeous. Hawkgirl had forgotten how his presence made her palms sweat.
"John?" she choked out and waited for him to wrap his arms around her.
For the first time in a long time, she felt safe and at peace. His arms had always had that effect on her. She never wanted him to let go.
The tears fell as she told, "Thank you for coming. I – I thought that you wouldn't be here."
"No. I'm here, Shy. I'm here." He ran his fingers through her locks, and she closed her eyes as he did.
When he pulled away, she found herself almost resisting. She needed John to hold her.
Shayera had needed John for a long time.
Maybe even before her husband had passed.
"The ceremony is about to begin. The others are already up there," she stated.
~8~
The Green Lantern placed a cup of coffee in front of Shayera and sat down beside her. The Justice League had stayed at her place long after all the other guests had left. They knew she needed to be with people she felt at home with, people who truly cared for her.
"So when are you going to visit us, Shy?" Wally asked the winged redhead and sipped his mocha. "You still have to meet Linda."
"That's right. You haven't met Linda yet," Diana confirmed.
"Who is this Linda?" Hawkgirl asked.
"Flash's wife. Can you believe it?" John laughed and winked in Wally's direction.
Hawkgirl even managed a chuckled. "Wife? You're married?"
"Yeah. Who knew?"
"What about the rest of you? Anyone else tie the knot while I was away?" Shayera asked, trying not to sound too obvious to John. He had a feeling that she was interested in his personal life alone.
Superman spoke up, "Well, I proposed to Lois a couple of months ago."
"Really? That's great. I assume she said yes."
"She did," Batman interrupted. "Of course, I had to talk her into it."
"Ha ha," Clark said dryly.
She moved her attention to Batman. "What about you, Bruce? Is there a lady at Wayne Manor?"
"Not quite yet."
"J'onn and Diana. How are your love lives?"
The princess blew her hair out of her eyes and shook her head as she said, "I think I'll pass."
"As will I," J'onn told.
"Fine." Shayera sipped her black coffee and bit her bottom lip. John could sense that she was nervous for some odd reason.
"Johnny isn't seeing anyone," Wally remarked. "Are you, GL?"
Lantern sent a glare in the kid's direction. What made him think that he was in charge of John and Shayera's futures, especially when her husband had just died? Flash was way out of line.
Batman noticed the uneasiness and saved the conversation by asking Hawkgirl if she needed the group to stay for the night. She declined, but that was no surprise.
Twenty minutes later, the gang was ready to leave. They had said her goodbyes and were about to walk to the Javelin.
"Honestly, I think we should have someone stay with her," Diana shared. "She's hurting right now. You all saw her; she's hiding the pain."
"Who wants to stay?" Flash asked. "You, Princes?"
"No," John firmly told. "I'll stay. I know her best. I'll catch up with you all in a day or so."
"Wait, John. Is that really a good idea?" Superman questioned. "No offense, but you are her ex. What if things get out of hand? What if –?"
"Nothing will happen, but if something does, I'll handle it. I promise."
The others nodded and walked away from him, but J'onn stayed behind.
"She wants you to talk to her," he told. "So take care of her. She needs you."
"Thanks."
~8~
"What are you still doing here?" Shayera asked when she saw John step into her kitchen. "I thought you were all leaving."
"They left. I decided to stay."
"But I clearly explained why I didn't need anyone to baby-sit me."
"Yeah, but you're stubborn. Deal." GL sat down at the table and narrowed his glowing eyes.
"What?"
"Do you really want me to go?"
"No, I don't." She sat down across from him and ran a hand through her hair.
"Shy, do you want to talk about it? About him?"
She looked away from John and at her hands. Shayera shook her head. She didn't want to be miserable; she didn't want to face all the pain and sadness. John didn't need to hear all that from her.
"You've been holding it all inside. That's not healthy," he stated softly. "Please, Shy. Don't do this."
"Do what? I haven't done a thing." She once again raised her eyes to meet his. "I didn't even cry, John. I haven't cried in years. Now, is that normal? Is it normal for a widow to not grieve for her dead husband?"
He didn't answer her.
"You know, it's my fault that he was killed in battle. I didn't cover him like I should have. I wasn't fast enough."
"Don't blame yourself."
"I was his backup, the only one who could've saved him..." She closed her green eyes and swallowed over the lump in her throat. "I'm a terrible wife and a terrible detective."
"No you're not," he assured. "Listen to me. You –"
"No! I am, John! I could've saved him, but I didn't. Something inside of me wanted him gone, wanted him dead... Something inside wanted to be free, and it knew that he had to die for that to happen." Hawkgirl could feel her hands start to shake, so she asked Lantern to get her a shot of scotch from the cabinet behind him.
He did as requested and poured himself one as well.
~8~
"You didn't want him dead. Your mind is making you feel guilty; it's playing tricks with your emotions," GL stated as she swallowed another shot. "You cared about him."
She shook her head again. "John, I was unfaithful to him."
"What?"
"I didn't sleep around, if that's what you're wondering," she explained. "I mean, when we made love... I found myself dreaming of someone else. I pretended that it was your arms I was lying in... that it was you who was loving me."
The Green Lantern couldn't breath. "You don't know what you're saying. You're drunk."
"No, not yet." Shayera laughed and poured another shot. "But I'm getting there."
"You left me for him, Shy. You loved him."
"Did I? Enlighten me, John. Tell me that I made the right choice. Explain why I wanted to be a warrior, a sidekick, instead of a partner and a friend? Huh?"
She stood from the table and threw the glass across the room, smashing it against the wall.
"Tell me that he loved me in return, John! Tell me I wasn't just another soldier! Tell me that I mattered!" Shayera shouted. "Please? Can you make sense of it? Any of it?"
He watched with tears forming in his eyes as she slipped to the floor and curled up in a ball, covering her shoulders with her beautiful wings. John got out of his chair and sat down next to her. Gently, he touched her forearm, and she flinched.
He didn't back away.
"It's okay now, Shy. I'm here." He carefully pulled her closer to himself and held her trembling body as she sobbed.
"I'm so sorry," she cried. "I am, John. Really, I am. I'm a terrible person. I always have been. He didn't deserve someone like me. He deserved someone so much better. I never made him happy."
"Shh... You're wonderful, and he knew that." He smoothed her hair and kissed her temple. "I've got you. You're okay now."
~8~
Shayera woke to the aroma of breakfast flooding the air. She sat up, with a struggle, and made her way out of her bedroom and to her kitchen. John was cooking.
"Good morning," he greeted with a smile. "Hungry?"
"Not particularly." She sat down at the table and groaned. "My head feels like an elephant had trampled over it... twice."
"I'm sorry to hear that, but I made pancakes and a fresh pot of coffee." GL set the breakfast before her and poured two cups of java.
"You didn't have to."
"Yeah I did. What are friends for if not feeding each other?" When she smiled, his grin grew.
"What do you think of me now, John? Do you –"
"Think that you are one of the most intelligent, compassionate, courageous, and beautiful people I've ever met?" he finished. "I do, for your information."
"But I –"
"You're feeling guilty. That's normal. You're seeing all the bad and forgetting all the good in the relationship with your husband. You two cared about one another. I know it, and so do you."
John reached across the table and took hold of her hand. His touch was so warm and caring. She had missed it, despite all his conclusions.
"So what do I do?" she questioned.
"What do you want to do?"
~8~
"Welcome back, Hawkgirl!" Flash yelled and hugged the redhead. "The JLA is back in major kick-ass, mace business!"
"Thanks, Wally."
GL watched the others talk to her as they sipped their drinks. The family was finally whole again. This time, no one would tear them apart.
"I'll help you settle in," Diana said and took hold of Shy's elbow. "I'm sure you must be exhausted."
"Uh, yeah. Goodnight boys."
"Goodnight," the men answered together.
John finished his Champaign and sat down on the couch. Wally immediately joined him.
"How'd you get her to come back?" he asked, innocently. "I kinda figured that she'd want to stay away from us."
"No. She was the one who mentioned returning."
Superman sat down across from them. "Do you think this is the right choice? Isn't she running away from her problems?"
"She's a grown woman, Clark," Batman interrupted. "Let her make those decisions."
Lantern shook his head. "She hasn't run away from her problems; they're inside of her."
J'onn nodded in agreement. "Yes. Shayera has been torn up on the inside. The death of her husband has truly shaken her."
"So what you're saying is that Hawkgirl needs help?" Flash concluded with a confused face.
"Something like that," John assured.
~8~
There was a knock at Shayera's bedroom door, so she walked up to it.
"Who is it?" she quietly asked.
"It's John."
She opened the door and saw a half-naked GL standing in her doorway; all he wore was a pair of drawstring sweats.
Shayera wasn't too far behind, wearing only a skin-colored nightgown.
"I saw your light... I wanted to check on you," he explained. "Is something wrong? Can't you sleep?"
"I just wanted to finish unpacking tonight," she explained.
He nodded and sighed. "Do you need anything?"
"No. Thank you, though."
The former marine flashed a small smile and turned away, but she grabbed his shoulder.
"Yeah, Shy?"
The redhead gently touched her lips to his cheek and said, "Thank you for coming back for me."
John's dark eyes seemed to sparkle. "Get some rest. We might have stuff to deal with in the morning."
She slightly grinned. "I hope so."
~THE END~