Sunrise's (name far too, long-fingers hurt, you know who I am!) A/N: For those of you out there who've taken their GCSE's, and had at least half a head of hair at the end of it, I salute you! (Does Rimmer salute ------- not mine, don't sue, was just trying to be funny!) And for those of you, who are about to do yours in the near future, I advise you now, for the hills, a fish mongers life isn't so bad nowadays! This Christmas, me and R.T.T (raging tree trunk) shall, hopefully, be posting quite a few chapters, as we'll have soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much spare time and I will be so happy to think 'what shall I do now…anything I like cos I've got NOTHING to do' 

r.t.t a/n: hellloooooo, fellow earthlings, and quite possibly the odd alien out there.

As sunrise told you, we are EXTREMELY busy

"What with; you may ask, as we do indeed come across as sad lonely individuals with no life (sunrise nods head in agreement), however we have been completing the horrendous (sp?) And not at all gratifying task of... REVISION. Yes, over the past week, Sunrise and I have been in over our head swimming in physics, notes, English lit books, drama scripts and quite possibly every word known to man floating around our heads. We've tested each other's knowledge on plugs, and Arabian coconuts for goodness sake, and now finally it is 1 blood chilling day till exams finally drown us with misery. So please be sympathetic. Review, and remember, we took the time out for you so do the same pwease.


It was nearly a week later before Lister finally forgave Hazza. He didn't actually say it out loud, neither of them did, they just sort of caught each other's eyes and grinned, a gesture of peace, call it what you will. Soon they were back to normal or so Lister thought.

It was dinnertime, and as Granger had confiscated both of their cigs, it felt wrong to go into smokers corner without anything to smoke and recently the price of cigs on the school black market had sky rocketed, due to increased chances of being caught. So Lister and Hazza had 'borrowed' a football from P.E, causing a bit of a mess in the process and were trying out their football skills for the up coming school match. Out of the two, Hazza was the best at football, he was the really sporty one, he'd spend many an hour glued to the telly watching the biggest names in football strut their stuff on the pitch. Lister couldn't be bothered as much with football, or any kind of sport. It meant 'getting involved' something he only did when he was forced to. Instead Lister would spend many an hour glued to the lips of a girl (not necessarily his girlfriend) Hazza, as per usual, was showing off. Playing 'keepy uppy' heading the ball this way and that and generally being a big head until Lister performed a sliding tackle, knocking him off his feet, before grabbing the ball and running off with it: "That's rugby you div" shouted Hazza, brushing bits of stone from his once-white-now-grubby-grey school shirt.

"Rugby, football" shrugged Lister "it's all the same to me" He stopped short as Maria sauntered past her arms locked over her books protectively, and gazing at Hazza, who gave her a stupid smile and an even stupider wave, that carried on waving long after she'd walked past.

Lister stood waiting for the gesture to stop, and after getting bored threw the ball at Hazza's head, jerking him back to reality. "Welcome back to the land of the living!" snarled Lister.

"Maria said that to me once" gasped Hazza, as though it was the most amazing thing in the world!

"And" said Lister, frowning.

Hazza's features blushed bright red " I just thought you'd like to know," he muttered, walking off to retrieve the ball.

Lister stood still for a moment, watching his friend expertly nip the ball onto his toe before bouncing it on his knee.

"What made you think I wanted to hear about Maria?" he said finally.

Hazza shrugged his shoulders "just felt like making conversation"

"What?" laughed Lister "telling me what she said to you, I could understand if it were something dirty, but god, Hazza, you must be desperate"

"It just slipped out, I was to busy speculating about her"

"Spec-u-lating" mocked Lister "Hazza are you feeling alright"

Hazza glared at Lister, "Of course i'm feeling alright" he snapped defensively.

Lister rolled his eyes, "Alright alright man, stop pms-ing, that's Katy's job." Lister snickered before continuing, "are you sure, man? No hot flushes? Headaches? Palpitations?"

Hazza frowned, "Do you even know what palpitations are Lister?"

Lister shrugged, "Dunno it makes me sound clever though don't it."

Hazza doubled over with laughter, "YOU................CLEVER!?"

Lister glared and stamped on his foot, "alright man, no need to take the piss just cos your acing everything" spat Lister defensively,

Hazza stopped laughing, "Lister, sorry...I"

He drifted off, leaving his sentence unfinished

"You what?" asked Lister, stepping even close to Hazza.

"Nothing" he muttered, turning away.

"No spill it man, you what" A sudden thought inside of Lister's head felt the need to make itself known "You don't wanna hang round with me any more" said Lister, backing away, failing to keep the hurt look from his face.

"No" shouted Hazza, following him

"Yes, you think i'm thick, well as far as I can remember you where there every time bunking off with me, you failed every test I did, and we both were pratting about for the past 4 years, so don't start callin' me thick Harrison"

A look of sympathy crossed Hazza's face soon to be replaced with hurt, Lister looked away he didn't want to be pitied. Hazza suddenly frowned, "Why do you wanna always do so bad man? You know if you actually worked-"

Lister snapped, "You don't want to do well Hazza. You wanna impress her!"

Hazza frowned feigning innocence, "who?"

Lister glared, "You know who I mean"

"No really who?" asked Hazza tapping his foot,

Lister exploded, "MARIA THAT'S WHO! YOU FUCKING SELLOUT"

"Okay, okay" soothed Hazza, "I AM trying to impress her" He paused hoping this would be enough to calm down Lister, evidently it wasn't.

"It's not like you've never changed to try and impress a girl, like the time, what was her name, Carly, she said she only liked guys with blonde hair" Lister bit his lip, knowing what was coming next "so" continued Hazza "you tried to dye your hair blonde, and it went wrong, You ended up with green hair, and gave Carly an asthma attack from laughing. Now, tell me something Sherlock, is that trying to impress someone or not?"

"Okay" snapped Lister "I was trying to impress her, pretty desperately actually, but you forgot the most important part of this story"

"Don't try dying black hair blonde?" offered Hazza

"No!" laughed Lister, "I scored a date with that pretty little punk from Crescent Close!"


Lister kicked the Pepsi™ can in front of him, normally Hazza would join in, maybe tackle him or play goalie but today was different. Today Hazza was seeing Maria on their first official "date" not tutoring or hanging out at lunch. No. A DATE. Hazza just didn't do date's.

He did making out, he did naughty things behind the bike sheds. But he didn't date; Lister doubted the word was in his vocabulary.

He cursed, how could he have let that

Maria influence Hazza. In the space of a week shed persuaded him to have a hair cut, improve his grades and quit smoking- even refuse to buy them for Lister which was pissing him off greatly as Hazza was the only one old enough to buy them.

Man, Maria had achieved in a week what his teachers, and parents had been trying to do for years.

Turn Aaron Harrison into a respectable citizen.

Lister, kicked the can onto the road, he was about to go after it when a freight lorry suddenly sped down the road and squashed the can into oblivion. Lister's stomach dropped. It was almost symbolic. A sign from God, that he was doomed for the rest of eternity from this point onwards- not that he'd been too blessed previously.

Lister stared at the can for a few more minutes before realizing that he was getting funny looks from 2 old ladies from across the road, who were gossiping covertly under their umbrellas. Lister blinked. It was raining? Looking up, he felt the rain on his face and hurriedly began to run towards the shops, and under an awning.

He looked up, 'Daisy's Ice Cream Parlor'.

He peered through the window; it was your typical 1950's style diner. Chrome, silver seats were set in front of a tall bar and a jukebox was lit up dimly in the corner. An old woman was stood at the counter wiping it down, smiling softly at a couple in the corner.

Lister glanced at them; they looked so sweet, so happy. For a moment Lister felt himself longing for that too.

Then he realized who it was.

Hazza and Maria.

They were sharing a huge ice cream sundae; Hazza was spoon-feeding it Maria, who was giggling profusely. A strand of hair, fell in front of her face, and Hazza's face suddenly became more serious, he brought his hand up to her face and tucked the hair behind her ear, before stroking her face. Both of them were gazing at each other now, before Hazza lent over and gave her a quick kiss on the lips. Maria closed her eyes and smiled softly, Hazza seeing the appreciation lent in again and gave her another kiss. Longer, more passionate and -Lister gaped- with tongues!

Lister, feeling like his stomach had been yanked out of his body by a hook, leant against the wall of the parlor, and groaned, but he was cut short cut short when he saw his Katy storming across the street "

"Hey babe!" he grinned, putting Hazza and Maria at the back of his mind "where you bin?"

She gave Lister a look of pure hatred and brought her hand across his cheek with an otherworldly force "you've been seeing my sister as well haven't you?" she snarled, raising her arm up for a repeat performance,

"I haven't, I swear!" gabbled Lister leaping away from the advancing hand.

"Liar!" she screamed, slapping him round the head again,

Lister managed to pin her arms down "I'm not" he paused "who told you?"

"She did!" growled Katy,

Lister cursed under his breath "I can explain!" he whined pathetically.

"Go on then..." hissed Katy, her kohl rimmed eyes narrowed dangerously.

Lister gave a weak smile, but said nothing

"Actually" he said finally "actually, I can't"

Katy went rigid with anger, "we-are-finished Dave Lister!"

Lister knew when things were bad as Katy always called him by his first name, "Honey" he pleaded

"Don't you' honey' me you evil, tow timing git, read my

lips scumbag WE ARE FINISHED!" Katy gave him one last icy glare before striding away.

Lister watched her walk off "can you tell your sister I'll pick her up at 8" Needless to say he got no reply.

"Lister" came a voice behind him. It was Hazza, looking confused and slightly embarrassed, "what are you doing here?" he asked.

"I was...just passing" Lister replied, watching Katy storm across the street, snarling at any unfortunate people who were in her way.

Hazza looked at Lister's glum face, and at Katy's raging show of pure anger and possible, as Lister so rightly predicted PMT, and put 2 and 2 together. He patted Lister on the back, "Katy broke up with you again?"

"Yup."

"You'll get back together- always do"

Lister bit his lip, "I dunno man. It's really bad this time-might be tomorrow before we're back together."