A quick A/N from Lar-ton: Getting to the end chapters now, hope you're still liking it! I'll explain about the quote, we're both Good Charlotte fans and we were listening to "I just wanna live" and we realized it tied in with Lister's antics at school...we've been meaning to put it in since chapter 3...but...we forgot...sorry!
"Stop your messing around, boy
Better think of your future
'Better make some good plans boy' said every one of my teachers!
Look out, you better play it safe
Never know what hard times will come your way
We say, where we're comin from
We've already seen the worst that this life can bring!"
Good Charlotte "I just wanna live"
Lister lay on his bed staring at his ceiling, barely moving.
He was perhaps taking the teenage cliché of locking himself up in his bedroom with his music blaring a step too far, but he wasn't in the mood for anyone at the moment.
He just wanted to be on his own...alone...maybe even for ever (the cruel irony).
There was a light tap on his door; he lifted his head slightly to fix it with a glare "go away" he mumbled, collapsing back onto his bed.
His Nan entered with a face like thunder "I've just got off the phone with your head master, Grander"
"Granger" Lister corrected sulkily
"Whatever" snapped his Nan "the fact is, I've been told that you've been expelled for 2 weeks...For fighting"
Lister couldn't find anything to say in his defense, so he kept his mouth shut, and stared at his chest, anything to avoid eye contact with his Nan.
"What's this all about eh" asked his Nan, perching on the end of his bed.
Lister propped himself up on his eyebrows, he was getting ready to lie but when he saw the look on his Nan's face, he couldn't bring himself to do it.
No matter how much it hurt he'd have to tell what was really going on!
"The truth is Nan" he said softly "I've not been doin' as well in school as you thought..."
For years he'd lied to his Nan about everything: his grades, his attendance, his reputation...he'd changed his report with the help of Hazza, by scanning his report and altering grades and comments.
He never mentioned detentions; he'd simply say he was playing football. He conveniently 'lost' letters about his bad behavior and parent's evenings were abolished according to Lister. Lying…it made life easier, and that was all Lister wanted…an easy life.
His Nan fixed him with a curious stare "I don't understand…"
Lister looked away "I've failed practically every lesson, i'm always in trouble and I've been lying to you" he paused "I'm not ahead of the class, I don't ace exams, I'm thick Nan! I'm completely bone bloody idle and there's nothing anyone can do about it…"
His Nan clucked and pulled him into a hug "I don't give a toss what you're exam results are lad…just grow up to be a fine young man and I'll die a happy women"
"Don't say that" replied Lister, feeling the same sense of dread descend upon him every time his Nan talked about death. Having spent most of his life with no family of such, Lister refused to accept the inevitable that one day…his Nan would die.
She smiled at his un-boyish concern, and gave him a hug and a kiss.
To Lister things were looking up, he'd received hugs off the 2 most important women in his life at that moment in time, and the truth was when you were in someone's arms, things never look as bad as they are…
"I'm annoyed you lied to me, don't you think I can take bad news or something?" said his Nan, giving him a little shake making him wince"what's the matter" she asked.
Lister showed her the bruises that lined his shoulders, reminders of his fight with Hazza. He didn't remember Hazza doing so much damage to him.
He quickly told of what had happened in the yard and within the space of 5 minutes, Lister found him self de-shirted, hoisted onto the counter top, and covered in TSP.
"I'm fine," he kept protesting as yet more oils and ointments were smothered onto his skin "honestly, it's just a bruise"
"I never trusted that Aaron Harrison from the start" sniffed his Nan, as she bathed Lister's shoulder in witch hazel and many other reeking fluids"his eyes are too close together! Sign of a mad man that is"
Lister smirked, but then screamed "that stings" he wailed, swatting his Nan away,
"Baby" she tutted,
Lister pulled a jokey face at her, before sighing"you do know I love you, Nan," he said,
"Course" she scoffed, ruffling his hair like she did when he was younger "and I love you...no matter how bloody lippy you get"
"Lister"
Upon hearing his name bellowed down the corridor, Lister turned round to see Aaron Harrison striding over to him.
"Shite" he muttered as his former friend came closer and closer. It was obvious what was going to happen next…
"What are you doing out of lessons" Aaron demanded,
Lister scowled at him "I could ask you the same thing"
Aaron puffed out his chest proudly "i'm a prefect, Lister. I'm given special permission to be out of lessons"
"Mm" nodded Lister "yes...I nearly missed the bright red jumper and pompous facial expression"
A week ago Aaron had been voted a prefect after one of the existing ones had moved away. The way Maria was carrying on, you'd think he'd been voted the new Jesus.
She was constantly fussing over him, straitening his tie or smoothing down his jumper.
To Lister it was perhaps the most sickening thing in the world.
"You're jealous" smirked Aaron, crossing his arm carefully to make sure you could still read the word 'prefect' embroidered on the chest of his scarlet jumper.
Lister rolled his eyes and ignored his snide remark "What the hell are you doing here anyway, Harrison? Shouldn't you be off somewhere handing out death sentences to people who accidentally fart"
Aaron's mouth twitched angrily "I was just running an errand for a teacher"
"Ooohh the immense responsibility! What's next, brewing up? Or maybe…I bet you dream of this don't you…photocopying" teased Lister.
It was Aaron's turn to ignore Lister, he simply sighed as if this whole situation was getting very tedious and carried on
"And I spotted you, dawdling as per usual so i'm here to carry out my prefect duties and i'm going to punish you accordingly"
Lister raised his eyebrows in amusement "every single teacher in this school has been trying to do that for years...what makes you think you can do it"
Aaron beamed"I have my ways"
"You know the one thing I hate" sighed Lister "it's people of 'authority'…well I say authority, you're just a jumped up hall monitor with a badge"
"Kiss the badge of authority," sang Aaron, grabbing hold of his tie on which the shiny badge sat and waving under Lister's nose, who looked at him as if he were crazy
"Did the double lobotomy come with the badge"
Aaron scowled "what were you saying about authority" he spat, tucking the badge away.
"I was just saying how completely bollocks it is" shrugged Lister,
"And why'd you think that" asked Aaron.
Having become a prefect he'd developed a sense of striving for higher authority, and to hear anyone bad mouth it, sent his blood boiling. Add Lister to that equation and you could fry an egg on Aaron's ears.
"I'm an anarchist" announced Lister.
"An anarchist" laughed Aaron "you can't even spell the word, let alone be one"
"Fascist" muttered Lister darkly, walking off,
"Oi" yelled Aaron "where you meant to be now, Lister"
"French" came the reply.
Aaron frowned threateningly "French is the other way Lister" he said through gritted teeth.
"Yeah, I know" smiled Lister, spinning round to face the infuriated prefect "i'm takin' the scenic route" he paused to give Aaron the 2 fingered salute before striding off.
Unfortunately Aaron followed him
"You're not going to get away with this Lister" he sneered"I'll have you hung for this"
"I'd like to see you try and find time between your 'prefect' duties, homework, exam revision and the demanding Italian Job wanted her daily fix of Harrison"
"Italian job" repeated Aaron, frowning
"Maria" smirked Lister
Aaron scowled at Lister but chose to say nothing on the matter "speaking of exams… shouldn't you be panicking in a corner somewhere? Trying to cram 5 years worth of work on 10 different subjects into 2 weeks"
"No" replied Lister casually "i'm only being entered for one exam"
"Oh what a surprise" said Aaron sarcastically
"It isn't actually, Harrison" snapped Lister "cos you were there the day I was told I was only being entered for one exam…remember" He paused"anyway, what about you, last I heard your summer holidays started the day of the exams, cos you hadn't been entered for any. You were just gonna sit there and sleep through your G.C.S.E's"
Aaron sighed. "I went round and begged all my teachers to re-enter me, I told them I was changed boy now that I'd gotten rid of Dave Lister...with all my hard work I should be able to get at least a c in each exam"
"How very fitting" said Lister sullenly "C…for complete and total crap head!"
Aaron chest began heaving with anger, Lister had not only stepped over the line, he was dancing on it"that-is-it" he said slowly "you are" before he could even finish his threat Lister him pushed him backwards. Arms flailing wildly Aaron fell backwards into the bin, but glared at Lister and went to jump up, only to find he couldn't…he was stuck.
He struggled in vain for several seconds before deciding to ditch his pride and ask for assistance
"Help me up" he snapped, holding his hand out to Lister, who merely smiled pleasantly and walked away.
"Lister, don't you dare walk away from me" screamed Aaron, still trying to get out of the bin where he was jammed. "Lister! LISTER"
"I'm sorry," said Lister in a singsong voice "no-one is available to take your call. Leave your name and number and I'll NOT get back to you as soon as possible. Bye bye...bin boy"
Aaron frowned and tried even harder to free himself from the bin "Lister... LISTER" but it was hopeless.
He'd already gone!
Lister groaned and leaned heavily against the door. From the sounds of it Harrison was still trying to get out of the bin, Lister had no idea why he did that. It was just too tempting... he was stood there...being cocky...a bin just behind him...just about his arse's size...the temptation proved too great!
Part of Lister still felt bad though, the old Aaron Harrison wasn't just a friend...he was
The best he'd ever had...and probably still would be years from now.
Lister glanced about the corridor, trying to take his mind off his non-existent friendship.
A poster caught his eye, sending him spiraling into an even worse mood.
The date for the school prom had been announced, Lister wasn't going.
Proms were for couples and he was currently single.
Katy had made friends with Joan Yates, who was a renowned man-hating feminist. She'd infected Katy with her ideas of sexual equality and woman's rights, and in front of the whole class Katy had dumped Lister during a debate on sexism.
She'd stood there and told how he was always treating her like some fashion accessory, merely there to look good and smile and laugh from time to time. Just when Lister thought things couldn't get any worse, Katy whipped her bra off with amazing speed and skill and burnt it with her lighter.
Lister was speechless with shock...he'd sat for 4 hours... 4 painstaking, butt numbing hours whilst she tried on every bra in the shop.
He'd sat there and endured Katy getting undressed, trying on bras of various colours, fabrics and designs.
He had to sit there and say whether he thought the bra was good or not so good.
He'd been obliged to watch Katy twirl about in front of the mirror whilst she asked his honest opinion.
He was forced to tolerate that and now she's burnt the one he's spent 20 minutes deciding over...the cheek of it!
'Still' thought Lister 'it's not all bad news' most boys when being dumped had to face up to the harsh reality that they were never going to see their ex-girlfriends breasts ever again. Lister didn't have that problem, all he had to do was follow Katy to one of her marches and there she'd be...at the front...tits out and bra aflame.
With a weary sigh, Lister headed back to French, he was counting down the days till he left Ashbury. He'd always enjoyed school…not the lessons, they were crap but everything else about school was okay. He had loads of mates…well he didn't know any of them half as well as he knew Hazza, but they were still good for a laugh, and he couldn't walk down a corridor without seeing at least 1 ex-girlfriend.
It was only recently that Lister had actually began to hate school and dreamt of the future…
