Walking to Mordor (by Frodo)
(originally Walking In Memphis, by Marc Cohn (ok, a million people have sung this song... my version is by Marc Cohn...))

      Put on my Elven cloak and
      Boarded the boat
      Set off from the land of the Golden Trees
      Middle of a battle ground
      Samwise Gamgee
      Why do you always follow me
      Yeah, I got a one-way ticket
      And I'm as scared as a boy can be

      Walking to Mordor
      Walking towards hurts that just won't heal
      Walking to Mordor
      But do I really feel the way I feel

      I dreamt a dream of Gandalf
      Bridge of Khazad-dum
      Watched him as he fell again and again
      That was when my whole world fell
      Now my Samwise does not remember
      He said Gollum would prove his worth
      But he just wants my Ring
      Above everything
      Before it all ends

      Walking to Mordor
      Walking towards hurts that just won't heal
      Walking to Mordor
      But do I really feel the way I feel

      Now, Gollum's got raw fish for his supper
      But arrows filled the air
      Caught by Faramir, not glad to see us
      I don't think we have a prayer

      Not got a prayer in Mordor

      Now we're back on our way
      Climbing a stair that's so high
      And I don't trust my loyal friend
      Cos he asked me if he could
      Share the load a while
      And I ran with all my might
      Into the lair of eight-legged hell
      And I died and lost the Ring

      Walking to Mordor
      Walking towards hurts that just won't heal
      Walking to Mordor
      But do I really feel the way I feel

      Walking to Mordor
      Walking towards hurts that just won't heal
      Walking to Mordor

      But do I really feel the way I feel

      Threw off the Orcish mail, and
      Started to climb
      We reached the base of the Dark Mount Doom
      And destroyed the evil Ring
      We reached the base of the Dark Mount Doom
      And destroyed my precious Ring

CB