A/N: Yet another chapter! I recently got my computer set up in my room which is why I've been typing a lot lately that and one of these chapters takes about 1/4th of the time it takes me to do a serious chapter. So yeah, this one's at least longer then the last one, enjoy.
"Christine I'm so sorry I left you alone with those Phans, I had no idea they would throw you in the lake." Raoul looked sympathetically at her while Erik simply rolled his eyes.
"I'm fine, really I am. But could we please get away from these people?" she gestured to the large group of Phans all sitting around the stage, watching them silently in vision which oddly reminded her of the ending scene of 'The Birds'.
"I would gladly do so but there's still the problem of them." Erik pointed to all the girls. "I won't be able to go five feet with out one of them confessing their love for me."
And just as if on queue, a shout could be heard across the stage. "I LOVE YOU ERIK."
Erik sighed, "You see."
"Well it doesn't help that you encourage them." Raoul added while keeping his eyes on Christine.
"I do not!"
It was then that an extra perky short Phan came skipping across the stage to Erik. She pushed her glasses up from her nose as she handed Erik a freshly pressed shirt. "I got your shirt for you Erik." She said while giving him a beauty pageant style smile.
"Why thank you Megan, it's greatly appreciated." Erik smiled back at the girl whose head came barely above his waist and took the folded shirt from her hands.
Megan then approached Raoul who smiled down kindly at the girl. Again she straightened her glasses before proceeding to give him a swift kick to the shin and skipping off again.
Giving out a loud yelp, Raoul clutched his newly bruised leg as Erik and Christine tried their hardest to restrain a giggle.
"Let me at her!" cried one of the R/C'ers before one of the others held her back.
"Oh no. Raoul, honey are you all right?" another said while trying to help him remain balanced as he hopped on one foot.
"You see," he began in a pained voice, giving Erik an evil glare. "This is all your fault. All I ever did was try to help Christine, and make her happy, and what do I get! Kicked in the shin and a light fixture nearly dropped on my head, and it's not even two in the afternoon yet!"
"It's ok Raoul, we understand." The four R/C'ers gave him a pitiful look while surrounding him protectively.
Raoul then looked sadly at Christine who was still trying to hold back a smile. "Oh, I'm sorry Raoul, but that was pretty funny."
"Crazy Phans," started one of the R/C'ers. "Don't they realize that Christine and Raoul are supposed the end up together?"
"Yeah, we all saw how long that lasted," Erik mumbled under his breath, taking a small step towards Christine.
"I bet I know why Christine left him," cried one of the Phans. Christine looked at the girl curiously as she continued. "Because Raoul's really just a cold hearted jerk! He's a cheating, lying, abusive, drunk, who denied Christine her right to continue singing because he's an ass!"
Christine and the four R/C'ers stood with shocked expressions firmly planted on their faces. The first R/C'er began rolling up her sleeve while glaring at the Phan.
"That's it!" she yelled. "That one dies!"
The Phan gave a small squeak before running off the stage to hide as the other girl advanced on her with an insane look in her eyes.
"Christine, could you tell them once and for all, that that's not what happened." Raoul asked in a dejected voice. "You'd be surprised how many are convinced that I hurt you in some way."
Christine moved to stand beside her former husband, who then received a rather unsettling look from Erik, before addressing the floor. "I can assure you all that Raoul was none of those things that that girl so presumptuously announced. So please stop trying to kill him."
Raoul gave her a thankful smile before yet another Phan cried out. "But you can't deny that he's a rich, spoiled, arrogant prick!"
It was Christine's turn to get upset as she signed for the R/C'ers to stay back. "Really? Erik, could you answer some questions for me?"
Erik simply shrugged before Christine continued. "Could you tell me who the best ventriloquist is?"
"I am."
"Who the best magician is?"
"I am."
"Who the best architect is?"
"I am."
"Are you a genius?"
"Yes."
"Who the best musician is?"
"I am."
"Who the best composer is?"
"I am."
"Who has best voice?"
"I do."
"Who the smartest person in the room is?"
"I am."
"And could you tell me what you do when the management doesn't give you your way?"
"Throw a fit and drop a chandelier on everyone."
"Thank you. I think my point was made." Christine crossed her arms on her chest as she looked out over all the Phans who were just sitting there, blinking.
There was a moment of silence when, "I LOVE YOU ERIK!" was once again screamed out.
Christine let out a loud sigh before she once again tried to address the girls. "Don't you people realize that the only reason you like Erik is because you've been brought up with movies like Friday the 13th and Hellraiser? That in reality most of your futures contain a lovely nine to five job for a boss you hate, only to go home to some unappreciative kids before cooking supper for your equally unappreciative husband who would rather go out for a beer with the guys than spend quality time with you, where as with Erik you could live in a world outside of reality, with a man who worships the ground you walk on, and is willing to do anything for your career and will support you? That it has nothing to do with you being any less judgmental than the rest of this world and any woman in this day and age would be crazy to give up that opportunity?"
The crowed sat dumb struck as Erik and Raoul gave her the most perplexed looks.
"When did you learn to become so cynical?" Raoul finally asked, still stunned.
"University, I majored in Psych with a minor in Women's studies."
"You went to university?" this time it was Erik who spoke, unable to hide the surprise in his voice.
"Yes, is that so hard to believe? While you two where busy sitting here, picking your nails, I was off actually having a life."
"I LOVE YOU ERIK!"
Shaking her head, Christine collapsed in a near by chair. It was pointless arguing with these people. Erik was about to speak with her when Crossover trotted up beside her.
"Uh, Christine?" Christine only gave her a distasteful look. "Meg heard you were back and would like to speak with you. She's waiting for you in your old dressing room."
With a sigh, Christine forced herself back out of the chair. "Alright, I'll go talk to her. Boys, I'll see you in a few." And with a tired look in her eyes, Christine made her way off stage and down to the old room.
Crossover then motioned for Raoul to come over to her. "You haven't seen Belle anywhere have you? Last I saw, she was kicking Hannibal's ass at chess and now he's just walking around with a goofy look on his face."
R&R Please
