Disclaimer: Only the story is mine. Everything else belongs to Paramount. kicks Paramount But they've abandoned their characters and stuff and did really nutso things to them, so I delete Paramount. I'm not making any money off this, so leave me alone, Paramount minions! I wrote this story, which was my very first-ever Voyager fanfic, in August, 2000. It was not beta'd. This story contains a relationship between two women, so if that offends you, please read something else.

Code: T/7.
Genre: Romance, Drama
Rating: PG-13


Ghosts, Chapter 4


In the following month, Harry Kim and Voyager's newest passenger became very close. Tom teased Harry, but he told B'Elanna that he was really happy for him. B'Elanna kept her feelings to herself. That she didn't understand why Tom couldn't seem to support Harry without teasing him, for one. Though Harry said he understood and that after all they'd been through, they always knew what the other one meant, B'Elanna still couldn't. She hated that Harry was closer to Tom than she was, though she was the one in the relationship with him.

She began thinking she might be happier without Tom. They hadn't done anything for fun in the last five weeks, she was just... bored. The only reason she stayed with him was because she still loved him. But... She didn't love him like she used to. Not like a lover. Like a friend. She shook her head and finished confiding to Harry. "And I hate that I feel more comfortable talking to you," B'Elanna looked down at her plate, which was only half-eaten, "Than to Tom." Harry looked at her with sympathetic eyes.

"Why can't you talk to Tom?"

"He's always busy... or he just doesn't seem to want to talk. Or rather, to listen to me. I've dropped hints, but he's oblivious."

"Well, I hate to say it, B'Elanna, but maybe you're better off without him. If you don't even feel comfortable sharing your feelings with him, then you can't spend your life with him." B'Elanna brought her fist up to her mouth thoughtfully. "You're my two best friends. I know that Tom loves you and that you love him. But if it isn't working out, there's no reason to keep beating a dead horse." B'Elanna's head shot up.

"You know what? You're right. But how do I tell Tom? I don't want to hurt him."

"Well, you could sing 'The time has come to say good-bye.'" Harry grinned and B'Elanna laughed. Then Harry's face turned serious. "Just try to be gentle. I'm the one who has to pick up the pieces." They exchanged smiles.

"So how's Aryn?" B'Elanna grinned at Harry. Everyone knew that he and she were a hot item. As hot as she and Tom had once been. B'Elanna expected a pang, but all she felt was the pain of losing what she had once had—not Tom.

"We've—she's—um, we're..."

"Come on, Harry. Tell me everything." Harry grinned.

"Lets just say, I didn't make the wrong choice for once." B'Elanna smiled.

"I'm glad to hear that." They ate in comfortable silence until Seven walked in. Seven had been terse and flighty around B'Elanna lately, never spending more time in her presence than necessary. Even more so than usual. Now Seven glanced over at them and walked quickly to the other side of the Mess Hall.

"What's with her?" Harry asked.

"I don't know. She's been acting strange ever since that incident with the bug people." B'Elanna said. Harry laughed. The 'bug people' was what the crew referred to the Ssckerellon as, since most of them couldn't reproduce the guttural hiss the beginning of their name required for correct pronunciation.

"Do you think she's okay? I've noticed that she's more reclusive than she used to be. This is the first time I've even seen her in here in quite a while. I think she's been eating here after hours."

"Why do you think that is?" B'Elanna asked. Seven of Nine sat alone in her corner, unable to not hear the conversation between the two other officers. She had been strangely fixated on Lt. Torres lately and she spent all her off-duty time trying to figure out why. She didn't understand why she was obsessed with this individual, but she was. The way she walked, smelled, the texture of her hair, the way she looked in her uniform... Seven moved her food around her plate, not really noticing it until Neelix's fuzzy yellow head popped into her view.

"Why, hello Seven? How are you?" Seven forced herself to eat a fork full of her nutritional supplement to keep Neelix from commenting on her loss of appetite.

"I am... fine." She chewed the food, noting for the first time that it had no real taste. It had never bothered her before, but chewing slowly, leaving it in her mouth longer than necessary, she had suddenly realized that its tastelessness was unappealing.

"Really?" Neelix sat down across from Seven and leaned towards her, his face all friendly coaxing. "C'mon, Seven. You may not smile, but I can still tell when you're frowning more than usual. I'm your friend, you can tell me what's wrong."

"Are you?" Seven felt... alone.

"Am I what?" Neelix was as bright eyed as a child. 'So innocent,' Seven thought, enviously. She suddenly desired his naïveté, his... good-natured amiability. Though she often found him annoying, his approach did seem to work to win him friends.

Friends. Friends had never meant much to Seven. She took the few friendships she had for granted. The doctor and the captain both professed to be her friends, she and Tuvok were close colleagues, but she still did not enjoy the activities that the other crewmembers shared. She decided it was perhaps because she did not share the closeness that they did. Harry Kim and Tom Paris were her prime subjects on the matter.

She did not have anyone with whom she was as close. Not even the doctor, because his program too often got in the way of their relationship. In addition, she had a suspicion that he harbored amorous feelings towards her, making their friendship slightly uncomfortable since the sentiment was not mutual.

"Seven? Seven? Am I what?" Seven returned her attention the Neelix, whose face had turned to anxious worry in a matter of moments.

"My friend." Seven took another bite of her food and noticed that it seemed to have a taste this time—an unpleasant one.

"Of course I am." Neelix put one of his hands over hers. "Why would you think otherwise?"

"I am..." Seven heard B'Elanna laugh and her throat felt like it closed. She stood up abruptly. "Excuse me," she said to Neelix as she walked quickly out of the Mess Hall and towards Astrometrics.

"Weird," said Harry to B'Elanna, commenting on Seven's departure. B'Elanna said nothing, merely watched the door, feeling her hearts begin to pound and worrying about Seven of Nine.


B'Elanna walked into Astrometrics to confront Seven. What she found made her stop in her tracks. Seven was sitting against the console, on the floor, her head in her hands and her shoulders shaking. B'Elanna rushed to her, dropping to her knees and putting her hands on Seven's shoulders.

"Seven? Are you okay?" Seven looked up and jerked away, standing as quickly as she could. Her face was tear streaked and her eyes swollen.

"Lieutenant! What are you doing here?"

"You seemed distressed in the Mess Hall and I had something to talk to you about already." Seven forced herself to stop trembling and control her emotions.

"I am fine, Lieutenant."

"Bull. People don't cry when they are 'fine.' Look, Seven. I want to know why you've been avoiding me. Why every time we're together you want to run to the other side of the ship and won't give me the time of the day unless you have to."

"It is eleven-hundred, forty-three hours. But what has the time of day to do with anything? The computer can supply you—"

"It's a figure of speech, Seven. It means that you won't speak to me."

"We are speaking." B'Elanna stood there a moment watching Seven, trying to figure her out.

"Then tell me what's wrong?" B'Elanna asked softly.

"Why should you care?" Seven turned away. "You have never shown any interest in my feelings before."

"My mistake," B'Elanna said, surprising them both. Both were silent and Seven refused to meet B'Elanna's eyes. "Maybe..." Seven looked up.

"What?" B'Elanna thought carefully before she answered.

"We could start over. Try not to be... adversarial. We could be friends."

"Friends?" Seven looked at B'Elanna, her heart racing. The question was very important to her and it showed in her eyes. B'Elanna saw it and couldn't stop herself. When her lips touched Seven's she discovered what had been missing in her life for so long. Something that Tom couldn't give her. 'Tom!' B'Elanna pulled back, apologizing. Seven's eyes opened and it seemed to take her a moment to realize what B'Elanna was saying. She frowned. "What are you sorry for?"

"I—Tom—I shouldn't have..." Seven looked at B'Elanna patiently while she stammered.

"Lieutenant Torres. You did nothing that I didn't wish. As for Ensign Paris, that is your concern, I cannot help you with him. As I assume it is your wish, I will not tell him of your...indiscretion, nor shall we discuss what has happened further until you are ready." Seven forced the calm words out, forced herself to be calm. Inside, her heart was pounding, she didn't want to pretend nothing happened, she wanted B'Elanna to herself, but she wanted her to be happy more than either of than either of those things, so she offered her silence.

"Thank you, Seven." B'Elanna had a new respect for her, but at the same time, a little part of her wished that Seven would demand she leave Tom and force the issue. But she knew that would only make her dislike Seven and refuse to leave Tom. But still...


"Why?" Tom asked. He had come to B'Elanna's quarters after his duty shift, prepared to ask her to marry him. Instead, he had been ambushed with her announcement that she wanted to break up. He had thought everything was going perfectly, that he had found someone to spend the rest of his life with. He couldn't believe that he was so wrong. "At least tell me why."

"I'm... bored, Tom. The things we had—they just aren't there anymore."

"Don't you love me?"

"Yeah. But not like that. It's... gone for me. I'm sorry." Tom didn't stay another minute. He turned and left, no interest in remaining friends—it would just be too painful. But he was a man that took no for an answer. He just didn't ever want to see her again and cursed fate that he would be stuck with her for another sixty years, barring wormholes and new technology. He headed to the nearest replicator to recycle the ring he'd spent a half-week's replicator rations on.

B'Elanna didn't run to Seven, no matter how much she wanted to. She didn't want to 'rebound' to someone she really cared about. But she didn't know if this would count as a rebound. Until she figured it out, she didn't want to act impulsively, so she didn't act at all.


Seven walked grimly to the captain's ready room, report in hand. She had found Arynlliana, the J'marel's home world. It was devastated. Janeway looked up from the report, her face pleading Seven to say she was wrong. Seven of Nine looked away.

Everyone on the ship had begun to know the bright-eyed, young, optimistic Aryn. She spent part of her time in sickbay, learning how to become a doctor and the rest with the captain, learning to be a science officer, a position that Voyager seemed to be lacking. She was gentle and quiet, but also very wild. The gentle side had won her over with the doctor, reminding him of the pupil he had lost years before—when Seven came on board. Everyone who had liked the gentle Kes liked Aryn. And everyone who liked adventure liked her, too.

She had started going on away missions with the crew, especially when food was on the list of supplies. She had an uncanny knack for finding food that even Neelix couldn't render inedible. Even Seven liked her for her efficiency and tenacity. She was always early and finished her work ahead of schedule. The thing that puzzled Seven was her daydreaming. She often seemed to 'space out' at inopportune times, sometimes ruining a project. Never on anything important, but Seven still worried when she saw the girl working on something that would affect all their lives.

Seven had worried that she would take her place as the captain's prize pupil, but such had not been the case. Certainly, the captain spent a lot of time with her, but never at the expense of the plans she made with Seven. Often Seven thought that was one of the things that made her a good captain, she tried to make time for everyone.

Aryn had been searching for her people since she learned of them from Seven's report. She had been alone on a planet for twenty-five years. She had been a mere child—only equivalent to five years, Earth development. But her species aged quicker—six times faster, to be precise. So, in actuality, she had been less than a full year old. Her parents had taken her, in an escape pod, to the surface of the planet to escape attack. Her father didn't survive the crash and her mother died a few months later. She raised herself, hoping that one day, she would be found.

But now...

Though she had been rescued and she lived a very happy life on Voyager, she had still harbored the hope that she would reunite with her people one day. According to the readings of the planet that had been identified as the J'marel home world, that would never happen.

Seven turned silently and left Janeway to her thoughts. Kathryn reread the report and estimated how much time it would take off their journey to investigate the planet firsthand.


B'Elanna looked at the away team. Herself, Harry, Aryn, the doctor and the captain. Aryn's usually bright eyes were shadowed and her normally milky skin was grey. Even her horn was dull and dark, causing Harry to send quite a few worried glances her way. Harry had become her best friend now, more than ever. It was hard on him, since he was also Tom's best friend, but he managed somehow. Tom was avoiding her like the plague and she just didn't have the time to care. She was always busy working or thinking.

She had been spending quite a bit of time with Seven. Somehow they kept managing to schedule projects so that they were working together or they 'ran into' each other in the mess hall or corridors. She felt something for Seven, of that she was sure.

"...will be your responsibility, Lieutenant." The captain finished her instructions and indicated that everyone should get on the transporter platform. B'Elanna stepped up, still lost in her own thoughts.

No sooner than they had materialized on the planet than B'Elanna lost hope of finding any survivors. Less than a meter away was a skull that resembled Aryn's features, only the horn was longer and the jaw was bigger. She opened her tricorder and began scanning for technological debris.

Aryn looked around at her every nightmare. She stepped forward, her tricorder forgotten. Memories of being safe and warm in her mother's arms flooded into her mind, being replaced by memories of coming back to the crash site to find her mother cold and lifeless. For this is what she saw everywhere she looked. Dead, cold bones and rock. On a continent that had once held periwinkle grass blowing in the wind against an emerald lake and blue sky. Opalescent stone houses were reduced to rubble and so much grey where it had once been white. Her hooves sunk in dusty, burnt clay that had once been alive and beautiful. It had all been beautiful. Now it was...

Harry's head whipped around at the sound of Arynlliana's scream. He ran to her as she collapsed, screaming words in her own language that he couldn't understand. He tried to hug her but she shoved him away, standing on shaky legs. Her horn was glowing faintly—a dull golden color. Tears ran down her face and she suddenly jerked her body around, galloping off away from the team.

"Aryn!" Kathryn shouted, putting up her tricorder. She began running after her, but her footing wasn't as sure on the rocky ground and she slipped. A hand pulled her up as she watched Harry Kim speed past her and she smiled at B'Elanna. "Thank you." B'Elanna nodded, then continued her pursuit of Harry and Aryn.


All her hopes, her dreams—gone. Aryn ran, blinded by tears, away from the death. But where could she run? Everywhere she turned, there was more death, more bones. She couldn't outrun them.

She felt a burning in her forehead, under her horn. It felt like it was pulling her somewhere. She chased it, chased the feeling, chased her broken dreams and ran while her throat burned from the acrid air and her hooves gathered little rocks to cut painfully into the soft parts of her feet. Suddenly the ground dropped out from under her and she fell for what felt like forever, finally landing to a world of darkness.

B'Elanna grabbed Harry before he could jump after Aryn. He struggled for a moment and then slouched against B'Elanna. "Lia!" he yelled down. "Arynlliana!" He waited silently for an answer, but none came. B'Elanna felt him crushing her hand as if she was his only anchor to life—but his grip was slipping.


Harry composed himself before the rest of the away team arrived. B'Elanna kept what had happened between them, leaving her friend some dignity. She watched silently as the captain organized the party, planning on how to enter the small hole and retrieve Aryn. B'Elanna felt distant from it all, like she wasn't really alive. She had felt like that since she arrived on the planet. She felt cold and alone. She walked up to Janeway and noticed that there was a look of depression breaking through the captain's eyes.

Perhaps it was the planet, B'Elanna thought. Aryn had often displayed empathic abilities. Perhaps there was a psychic echo issued by the former inhabitants while they were being slaughtered.

When B'Elanna had been at the Academy, she had known a Betazoid cadet who had talked once of psychic echoes. He had said that they had driven his sister insane when they once visited a planet that the Cardassians had kept and murdered Bajoran slaves on. That Betazoid girl joined the Maquis a few weeks later, and B'Elanna had met up with her only once during her time with the rebels, but she remembered the haunted look in her eyes and the way she talked about 'the voices of ghosts.'

The Betazoid had heard the echoes because she was telepathic. B'Elanna wondered if telepaths could leave an echo that non-empaths could pick up on subconsciously. It was the first time B'Elanna had thought hard about telepaths and empaths, having never really been close to any herself. Tuvok, Kes, Suter and Aryn were the only ones she had spent any time with, and it had never been any quality or even quantity time at that.

B'Elanna broke out of her musings as the captain told her to get back up to the ship, that she could take a break until later. She saw that Tuvok had beamed down with a few crewmen and repelling/climbing equipment. Tuvok was issuing orders to a couple security personal in the group while the others began setting up equipment for the rescue expedition. B'Elanna, who had never been timid, approached the captain with her suspicion. The captain listened attentively, as did Lt. Tuvok, the latter making her somewhat nervous. But when she was finished, Tuvok surprised her.

"I believe she may be correct. I have experienced a growing unease since we arrived, but had dismissed it as concern that we might be attacked by whoever did this."

"Whoever did this?" Harry snapped. "What do you mean 'whoever did this?' It was the Ssckerellon! Who else?" Tuvok raised an eyebrow at the outburst.

"We have no proof that the Ssckerellon were even involved, Ensign."

"They had Aryn on their ship!"

"They found her on the planet that her parents' escape pod crashed on twenty-five years earlier," Tuvok calmly countered

"What about their own report that her species was 'exterminated?' Or Seven of Nine's report that they hunted the J'marel?"

"Still, there is no proof that the Ssckerellon were responsible for this. We do not know how many enemies the J'marel had."

"What other species could be so cold-blooded?"

"Enough, gentlemen," Janeway interrupted. "This is no time for this. When we rescue Aryn and are back on the ship, you can debate the matter and work on investigating the incident. But for now, can we please concentrate on the matter at hand?"

"Yes, ma'am." Harry said and Tuvok nodded. B'Elanna watched them walk toward the rest of the team as she dematerialized.

Seven reviewed Voyager's music files, looking for something different from the music the doctor had already exposed her to. Despite how fond he was of the pieces, she often felt that their lyrics lacked the emotional intensity that she felt at that moment. She had begun by exploring the Klingon musical section, finding the operas and common songs a little too bloody for her tastes. Even the love ballads seemed to have fighting and dying firmly interwoven throughout.

She finally found one that she liked the lyrics to, but the tune was nonexistent. She didn't mind the monotone as much as the lack of rhythm. It was listed as popular with the adolescent crowd. In fact, much of the music in that category was lyrically appealing to her, but often lacked any instruments but the drums that Klingons were so fond of.

For days she had been conducting her search in her off hours. Since Mezoti, Azan and Rebi had left, she had found herself with more free time with which to occupy herself with her quest to 'discover herself,' as the Doctor put it. Music seemed at least a little important with every member of the crew, so she thought she should begin forming her own opinions.

Vulcans did not have lyrical music, not that she was surprised to discover this. The Romulan music on file was full of propaganda, the Cardassian music: paranoia. Andorian, Deltan, Bolian... She scanned hundreds of cultures, finding music in each one that she liked and music that she didn't. But she was having difficulty finding the right balance of emotion from music and lyrics matching her emotions.

Since she was born Human, she decided to try more Terran music. Recent music tended more towards synthesized sound in orchestral styles. She looked at the twenty-third century. In the later part, Earth lagged in musical achievements, the middle was filled with war songs and the early was brass and drum-styled.

She finally found what she was looking for in the tumultuous time just before the Eugenics Wars. In the mid-to-late-twentieth and early twenty-first centuries. The electric guitar was a sound she liked and she found the electric bass guitar strangely comforting in its repetition. The drums had more variation in sound and she liked the emotional honesty of the lyrics. She didn't like the songs that hid their meanings in euphemisms, as they were hard for her to understand or identify with, but she liked the ones that bluntly stated feelings and emotions.

A tiny note in the database caught her attention. Apparently, Arynlliana had liked this particular music as well, since there was a program that contained quite a few of the songs Seven had already begun to listen to and enjoy. She decided that she would request to review Aryn's files when she returned to Voyager. For now, though, it was dinnertime and she had promised Naomi a game of Kadis Kot after dinner, so she had to stay on schedule.

On her way to the Mess Hall, Seven bumped into B'Elanna. She started to smile (something she only did for B'Elanna) when she saw the expression on the other woman's face. "What has happened?"

"We lost Aryn." B'Elanna didn't meet her eyes. Seven felt like ice was moving down her back.

"She is dead?"

"No!" B'Elanna looked up. "At least, I don't think so. She fell down a hole on the planet and no one knows what happened to her." Suddenly, the red alert klaxon went off and both women hesitated only a moment before heading to their stations while Commander Chakotay's voice announced:

"All hands, brace for impact. I repeat..."

To be continued...