dont own YYH
Chapt. 52
Vow to Kill
"Darkfire, I'm so sorry," a smooth voice says. It was Osadyro. She hadn't changed at all. Only her purple eyes had become tinted with red from crying tears of blood.
"Don't be."
"You had what you wanted and needed…now he's gone," she chokes, holding back more tears. She pulls her hood over her eyes and glides quickly out of the room.
"Hiei," a girl cries. I look around and see Yukina. Her sea-green hair reaches her waist, no longer held back with a ribbon or bow. She was wearing a white robe that was tied with a black sash. And her beautiful red eyes showed pain and sorrow,a look that did not suit her innocent face.
She still doesn't know, does she, Hiei? You left her blind.
"Don't be sad, Yukina. He wouldn't want to see you cry," I say softly.
"But what else can I do?" she sobs, sitting beside me.
I pull her close to me and hold her tight. "You can live a happy life. He would've wanted that for you. Want to know a secret?"
She nods quietly.
"He loved you as only a brother could," I whisper, resting my cheek on her quivering head. I reach up and pull a necklace from his pocket. "I think you were searching for this." I dangle the tear gem necklace before her.
"It looks like…" she starts, pulling out her own and holding them next to each other, "mine."
"Because they came from the same person. He should've told you a long time ago. Yukina, he's your brother."
She couldn't speak. But she could cry, so that is what she did. She cried and cried, littering the floor with sparkling tear gems of sadness.
"We 'ame a' soo' a' we 'eard!" an unforgettable man shouts out of breath. "K'rama, is 'e really 'ead?"
"I'm afraid so," was Kurama's sad reply.
"That can't be so," another familiar man gasps, stepping into the room. "How?" the Ice Master wonders, looking at the faces in the room for an answer.
"He committed seppuku," a childish man says. It was Koenma; he looked the same. "I'm terribly sorry, Darkfire. I tried to talk him out of it." He rests a hand on my back, asking my forgiveness.
"And I thank you for trying," I answer sadly. "But you should be apologizing to Yukina, not me."
"Yukina, I –"
"It's ok, Koenma-sama," she interrupts quietly. She stands, bows, and exits. This must be so hard for her, harder than it is for me.
"I never thought he'd go this way," a female smirks, entering the room. Her caramel hair was tied back into a neat bun and her caramel eyes pierced the thick atmosphere.
"Shizuru," Kuwabara warns.
"You all are thinkin' the same, baby bro. I just had the guts to say it," she muses. "Honestly, I feel for ya, kid." She turns her eyes to me, pitying my loss. "I really do."
"You've all changed," I say, looking at the floor.
"O'ly in app'rance," the Irish man smiles, tilting my chin to look at him. His bright blue eyes hadn't changed one bit.
"Oh, Jin. Some have changed so much more though. Urameshi and Kuwabara have gotten more mature over this time."
"She's right, you know. Some of them have changed in more ways than one," Touya offers. His sharp eyes pierced my soul, just as Hiei's once did.
Hiei…only death can ease the pain.
"If…if it's no trouble, I'd like to be left alone," I smile, it was a small smile.
They nod and exit one by one. Once the door was shut, I turn my attention back to Hiei. He had been redressed into a white tank top and a pair of jeans. Both looked rather large on him. I could see the ripples where a bandage had been wrapped around his wounds. The dead do not bleed, so what good was the bandage?
But I did not remove it.
"Hiei, I know you can't hear me. I know that you're not in there. But there's just something that I must tell you." I stop to take a deep breath. "Death is the only way to forget, the only way that the pain will stop throbbing. A lot of people will be killed. And they will die by my two hands. I cannot stop this from happening."
I touched his face with my hand; it was so cold. Never before had I used my hand to touch his face in a kind, loving manner; the last I touched his face with my hand, it was to punish. It was in vain then. Now, it was a longing love that I touched his soft cheek.
Murder.
"Hiei, I know you told me not to become what you once were, but you aren't here anymore. You can't be here to stop me. I wish I could, but…I can't. My claws yearn to tear through flesh and bone; my eyes beg to see the blood of the dead staining my hands; my ears long to hear the screams of those dying by my wrath. It is an unbridled urge that I must obey.
"I may never be able to stop. But I can promise that I'll never be caught doing the action. Only when I let them, will they catch me. This is Enma's punishment."
I stand and gently kiss his cold cheek. And, before teleporting away, I whisper my last words to his unhearing ears:
"I'm so sorry, Hiei."
